Our Nerdy Little Secret

SS nearly stepped on this guy when we were out Geocaching today. Yep, he was alive, but fortunately didn't seem too bothered by nearly being stepped on.

We started geocaching last year, shortly before spring break. You go to the geocaching website, find coordinates for hidden caches where ever you happen to be hunting that day, plug them in to your GPS, and you're ready to go. (Well, actually it's a little more complicated than that, but you get the gist.) It's known as a "high-tech treasure hunt." It is shocking to learn how many hides there are in any given area. There are tens of thousands in our metro area, and always have plenty of options wherever we go on vacation.

The caches we have found range in size from about 1 sq. cm. to a 3 gallon jug. For DH and me, the fun is in the finding. The kids like the larger caches, because they can trade stuff--usually inexpensive toys. But sometimes you get really cool stuff. The last time we went out we were the First to Find a new cache and were rewarded with a $20 GC to a local restaurant.

It's kind of a nerdy hobby, but it gets us (a bunch of book and computer geeks) outdoors. And its one of the few things that appeals to the whole family. And, after the initial investment of a GPS, its cheap. Our GPS was only about $75--a very basic model, but it does everything we need. Oh, but we did have to invest another $15 in a cable to download coordinates instead of having to enter by hand. It's also best to have a PDA so that you can carry along hints and info about the caches you are seeking, but I had an old one sitting in the closet.

We had a fun day, tramping through an urban nature preserve and searching for hidden plastic treasures.

Not that desperate

I applied for a couple of jobs lately that were posted on my school's job board. Today while I was happily shopping the dairy aisle in the grocery store, I got a call from one of them asking me to come in for an interview tomorrow. I was surprised that 1) they were calling to set up an interview less than 24 hours after receiving my resume and 2) that they wanted to interview me on a Saturday. But it was a small firm and I thought perhaps he was just so overwhelmed that he needed help asap and Saturday was the only time available.

So I got home and decided to google the firm. I had already done this yesterday, but didn't turn up much. I'm not sure what I did differently today, but I made a gruesome discovery.

This firm (along with 3 others) is responsible for the most patently offensive advertising campaign in the legal industry. The advertise regularly on the raunchy morning talk radio show that I listen to. Every time I hear their ads I comment about how degrading they are to the legal field. They even have "The [Sleazy Law Firm] Girls" that go to local bars where they host wet T-shirt contests. No I am not kidding. Don't ask me how that gets past the state bar advertising regulations.

The reason I didn't immediately associate the firm I applied with is because there is another law firm usually mentioned. But if you go to their website, it links to four different firms--and one is the one I applied with. Once I told DH the name of the firm he said, "Oh yeah, I think I have heard him mentioned on the radio."

So now I have to call back and cancel the interview. There is no way in hell I would work for these people. And if they ask why I am cancelling, I will be happy to tell them.

P.S. In case anyone is wondering about Pushy Mom, she has yet to return my call.

3 weeks

Til bar results come out. I'm beginning to freak out a little. I am being asked about it more and more. A couple of nights ago DH asked when exactly they are out, and then I did not sleep at all because I was playing out the possible scenarios in my mind all night.

I definitely want to be alone on that day. I just can't imagine being in an office and having to deal with people and then actually make my way home if I fail. And I want to be able to scream and dance if I pass. I told DH that no matter what, we needed to book a sitter because I am getting sloshed that night.

I remember when results came out last year. There were two recent grads working in the clinic. All day long people were in and out asking, "Do you know yet?" I happened to be in the clinic when the results came in--late afternoon. I was in the office of one when I heard a yelp from the other office. Of course, we all knew what it was. And then the one whose office I was in burst into tears. It was very uncomfortable, the range of emotions that suddenly filled our small workspace.

I am seriously contemplating sending the direct link for bar results directly to everyone who keeps asking me, and telling them, "If you don't see my name on this list, don't call me." I honestly don't know what would be worse--the public humiliation that would have to be played out over and over as all the people in all the different components of my life ask about it, or the hell of taking the damn thing over again.

Interesting article

Abortion rates same whether legal or not.

Boundaries people!

I swear to god I am a magnet for weirdos. Apparently Pushy Mom called yesterday and chatted with Lucy, our nanny. Pushy Mom told Lucy that she was calling to see if I could pick up her kids from school next week because she was having a medical procedure and her husband would be out of town. Lucy informed her that I have been working this week, my schedule is unpredictable and she doesn't know my availability for next week.

So Pushy Mom asked Lucy if she would pick up her girls! Hello? Am I wrong for thinking that was totally inappropriate? I pay Lucy to take care of my children. It is not fair for her to feel obligated by my acquaintances or to have to take on extra duties on their behalf. And anybody with half a brain should know this. I mean, would you ask my housekeeper to come mop your floor? Besides the issues of 1) Lucy is a complete stranger to this woman, and 2) Lucy drives a car that doesn't hold 5 children.

So today I will have to call and lay down the line with Pushy Mom. I am great at being confrontational in a lawyerly sense, but not so great with interpersonal relationships. I have a tendency to be blunt and burn bridges. I am trying to break this habit. Especially in this situation, since our daughters are friends and I will likely have to deal with this woman for at least the next few years. On the other hand, Pushy Mom has revealed a lot of personal information in the last couple of days that has convinced me to rein in this relationship. My children will not be spending time at her house. But I don't know that its fair to our daughters to completely cut off their relationship.

Why can't my children make friends with normal parents?

Getting Better

I was called in by contract firm yesterday to draft the petition from the research I did last week. Yea! Moving up to document drafting seems to be a good sign--more responsibility anyway. Then a minor emergency came up late yesterday afternoon and I was assigned to address it. I didn't get home until 10:00 last night. Partner just called and seemed pleased with my work and told me that he had more projects for me but needed time to organize.

More good news, I got an email setting up an interview for next week with a small plaintiff's firm. Still haven't heard back on the clerking position, but I didn't really expect to before the end of this week.

DH has an interview today. He has been looking since early summer, but unlike me he is in a position to be picky about what he accepts and nothing has panned out yet. Oh yeah, and the MRI of his kidney cyst came back ok, so we were pleased to hear that he is not expected to die any time soon. And now we have $800 worth of pictures of his insides.

So I guess I should have taken a poll...

...before going with Google Reader. I really didn't know whether Google or Bloglines was better, but I was more familiar with Google products so I just went with that. So far it seems to be working ok, and I am too lazy to move everything to try out Bloglines.

Meanwhile, not much going on here. It was kinda rainy today so I made a super yummy potato corn chowder. After three years of take-out and frozen dinners I had almost forgotten that I am a pretty decent cook. I am now miserably stuffed.

Work yesterday was much more interesting than the last time. I was glad to have a more intellectually stimulating project, but I don't think I really clicked with that partner. He did say he may need me again next week but to wait until I hear from him. I really need something a little more steady. In addition to the unpredictability in my own life, I hate to keep telling my nanny that I don't know when I will have steady work for her again. And one of these days she's not going to be available when I call.

On the bright side, the name partner who hired me stopped by to say he was glad to see me again. I think he likes me--that has to be a good sign, right?

I finally joined the 21st century...

...and set up Google Reader. Before today, I have been blog-hopping the old fashioned way--by scrolling through my favorites list. Which wasn't really the most efficient way to go about things, since then I had no idea whether a blog had been updated or not. But I am resistant to change and had my little ritual. Once or twice a day I would go through my list in a specific order--not necessarily the order of my list. There are the blogs I check daily, and others I check only once or twice a week. Some even less often, only there for when I am really bored. So I am giving up my ritual, because now Google will tell me what's new. We'll see how it goes.

P.S. Contract firm called this morning and a different partner wants me to come in tomorrow for a project--yea!

Road Trip

The girls had no school today for some completely random reason, so we decided to take the girls to a wildlife preserve. It was awesome and we all had a great time. On of the first things we saw was this guy:The girls were tossing him food pellets out the window, but apparently he was not getting enough, because all of the sudden he reached in the window and stole the entire bag of food right from TT's lap! DH had to go rescue the bag of food.

A few minutes later, this guy popped his head in my window, like a jack-in-the-box:

This guy is huge and has enormous antlers, but is very sweet and gentle:

The zebras were very friendly and would block the road until you stopped and fed them. One even tried to chew on our dashboard through the window. Doesn't he just look like he's posing for the camera:

This guy's saying, "Hey, y'all got any food in there?"

Yeah, we've got food.

The highlight of our day was definitely the giraffes. Partly because TT is a giraffe freak, so her excitement was contagious. But the giraffes were all very sweet and friendly and ate right out of all of our hands.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse

Today I got a rejection letter from a firm that I swear I have never applied with. And it's BigLaw, so I am pretty sure I would remember. (Besides, I have a spreadsheet to keep track of these things.) I think it is not a good sign when I am rejected before I even apply.

Kickin' it old school

DH installed NES emulators on all of our computers, so now we all fight over who gets to play Mario Bros. The kids love it. We had been contemplating getting some kind of game console as a family gift for Christmas this year, but who needs a Wii when you can save the princess on your own PC?

P.S. DH had his urologist appt. today. Not worried about the prostate, but there is a cyst on his kidney that is concerning (the GP mentioned it, but didn't seem concerned), so he has an MRI tomorrow. And the uro. ordered more tests to work on the recurring kidney stone problem.

Here we go again

Had another interview this morning. I was really apathetic going in. I have reached the point where I feel interviews are a waste of time because I never even get so far as a second interview. (Have I mentioned that I got the rejection letter from suburban DA's office? Other than being another kick in the gut while I was already down, I am ok with it. It was really too far to drive and I loathe the thought of selling my house right now.) Anyway, this was a for a law clerk position with the criminal courts in Big City. When I initially applied, I really wanted this job. But I applied about 6 weeks ago, and had nearly forgotten about it by the time they called for an interview. And over that time the interest kind of wore off--it would be all research, I wouldn't get to litigate and it's government so it wouldn't pay well.

But after the interview, I really want this job. That scares me, because it is hard enough to take rejection when I don't really care about the job--I don't want to deal with rejection from a job I really want. But this would give me great experience, put me in the perfect position to meet everyone remotely involved in crim law in Big City, and be a great way to start my career. Even the interviewer pointed out that most clerks get stolen by the DA or someone else--which is exactly what I was hoping for. Even thought I am occasionally blinded by visions of big money, my real goal has always been to work in the DA's office.

Overall the interview went ok. It was very relaxed and the chief interviewer was very nice and laid back. But then I discovered that one of the other interviewers just came over from the DA's office and she is the person that I had to pester to get the info I wanted for a paper I wrote last year. She remembered me and that I had to go through one of the judges to get the information I was seeking. I'm not sure that this is going to bode well for me.

So now I am desperately wanting this job, but not optimistic. They said they were doing interviews the rest of this week and into next week. I don't think that I have ever gotten a job that I actually had to compete for. Apparently charisma is not my virtue, and someone else always looks more appealing than me. Everyone I have actually worked for has praised my work--but I swear there were no other applicants for those positions and I was always hired on the spot. Maybe they just all had really low standards.

In slightly self-esteem raising news, I finally heard back from contract firm today--9 days after submitting my final work. The partner I had been working for had a family emergency and has been out for the last week and will likely be out another week. I was told that she had reviewed my work and it was fine, and she just wanted to let me know why I had received no contact and have me resubmit my billables so that I would get paid. At least now I know that my recent unemployment is not because of anything I have done.

If you like PostSecret and lolcats...

...then you'll love lolsecretz.

Yes, I am obsessed w/ lolcats.

I Survived

And there was virtually no drama. I kept the girls busy with activities so that they wouldn't have too much time to fight. Even the dueling BFF's seemed to get along well, and both were the last to leave--by a lot. (When the invitation says til 10:00 am I do not want your kids still here at 11:00 am.)

I think the BFF mom who called sort of fosters the drama. I would love to make friends with my kids' friends' moms, but I swear, they are all freakin' nuts. First there was PsychoMom , then another friend's mom who always seems half asleep. Her kid will call and invite herself over and then stay for hours and hours before her mom calls her home. I think the mom is possibly suffering from depression--or some kind of soccer-mom drug addiction. When she's awake and coherent, she's very nice.

And now the new BFF's mom (the one who started the drama yesterday) who is pushing very hard for our daughters to be BFFs and calls me almost every single day. She is very pushy and I find myself constantly having to draw lines--like when she heard I was planning PSs party, it was, "Oh, you must go here and buy this, and I have this you can use, and you have to do this, and what is your theme?" WTF? I don't have a theme--I thought that was a little kid thing. And the first time she was over to drop of her daughter she gave herself a tour of our home, giving me decorating advice all along the way. She is nice enough, besides the pushy thing (and the drama thing, and the her kids are very spoiled and seem to never hear the "no" word thing.)-it is just tiring having a conversation because I am forever having to sidestep all of her suggestions.

And so it begins...

The drama that I was hoping to avoid at PS's b-day party tonight, I mean. And the party doesn't even start for another 45 minutes. BFF #1's mom called this morning to inform me that BFF told her that BFF #2 liked to flash kids on the playground by pulling up her shirt. I calmly responded that I knew BFF #2 very well because she lives 2 houses down and she is at my house almost as much as she is at her own, and this did not sound like BFF #2 type behavior at all. I told BFF #1 mom that I would talk to PS about it and get back to her.

PS informed me that she had never, ever seen anything like that from anybody at school and that BFF #1 does not like BFF #2 at all. Great. So I called BFF #1's mom back and told her that PS had not seen that type of behaviour, I did not really think that sounded right, and there were apparently issues between BFF #1 and BFF #2. BFF's mom finally backed down--she was sort of insinuating that I shouldn't have BFF #2 at the party--there was no way that was gonna happen.

We determined that it must be a jealousy thing. At this age a girl wants her BFF all to herself, and there are two girls claiming BFF rights to PS. I know that PS had an issue w/ BFF #1 last year when PS befriended a new girl, and BFF #1 quit playing with her and told her they couldn't be friends anymore unless PS dumped New Girl. New Girl will also be at tonight's party.

Wish me luck, my hair may be completely gray before the night is over.

P.S. DH passed his kidney stone, finally. It was ginormous. (Well, not as ginormous as a baby's head, but he gets really PO'd when I point that out.) Seriously, it was an huge and jaggedy and I can see why it was causing so much pain.

Because life was already going so well

DH has been home most of this week trying to pass a kidney stone. He has had a few in the past which cause lots of pain for a few hours and then the pain subsides and the stone passes within a day or two. This one has been causing lots of pain since Tuesday and isn't in any hurry. DH finally went to the doc, who ordered a CT scan. The scan found the stone and also an enlarged prostate. We don't know what the deal is with his prostate being enlarged, and the doc wouldn't elaborate. I always though prostate problems were kind of an old guy thing. DH is 32. The doc did get him in with his urologist on Monday. But that has me a little worried because it usually takes a couple of weeks to get in with a specialist. Doc also said that if DH doesn't pass this stone soon he may have to be admitted at the hospital. He has started running a fever, which is not a good thing. Really, if DH just had to mess up a part of his body, I would prefer that it not be so closely associated with his fun parts.

My daughter is a klepto

In preparation for PS's slumber party this weekend, DH and I decided to go in and help her really clean her room. PS is a packrat, so we have to do this a couple of times a year. (The last housekeeper we had decided on her own to clean under PS's bed and came out crying--seriously!) She saves every scrap of paper or wrapper saying, "I can use it for a craft or a science experiment!" My grandmother apparently fosters this behavior, because PS had all kinds of weird stuff that appeared after spending the summer with my grandparents. PS has paper and junk stuffed everywhere possible--in her bins and baskets, drawers, dresser, nightstand, and of course, under her bed. It isn't gross stuff--she isn't allowed to have food in her room--it's mostly just paper. But we filled four big trash sacks with stuff from her room.

Apparently her packrat tendencies have led her to filch stuff from the rest of the house and bury it in her room. I found three half-boxes of Kleenex, a Ziploc full of placticware, a bunch of cellophane treat bags leftover from a party, leftover valentine treat bags, two rolls of scotch tape, a roll of packing tape, the dog's nail clippers, a wreath hanger, about a million q-tips, and the hole punch that I really needed for her birthday party invitations last weekend.

WTH? Why on earth does a kid need all this stuff. And while they are minor things, it is really irritating to know that you just bought Kleenex or tape and then not be able to find it. I guess I now know where to look.

DH thinks she has a sickness and is going to end up like those crazy people on tv that fill their houses full of crap and just keep bringing in more. I honestly don't know where she gets this compulsion (yes I do, it's from my grandparents who have never thrown out anything, ever), but it's not from me. When I no longer need something, I donate it or trash it. I don't like clutter and do not have a house full of junk or nick-knacks (how the hell do you spell that?) So why is my daughter becoming crazy klepto packrat girl?

Validation

This is exactly what I have been bitching about for the last few months.* It's like I have been validated. I'm not just a big whiner--there really is something going on. This article could have been about my school. A T1 school, which claims an average starting salary at something like $98K, and swears 98% of its graduates are employed 6 months after the bar. I already knew the employment numbers were skewed because if you don't have a job, the school will create one for you. There are law graduates essentially working a secretaries to different departments within the school. Wonder if they are reporting what they are getting paid--cause it sure ain't anywhere near $98K.

I have tried to be brutally honest about my plight (which is why I sound so whiny so much) to try to counteract the too-sunny pictures painted by the law schools. I graduated with honors from a T1 school and do not have a job--and I know of many in the same boat. I did externships, clinics, mock trial and worked for less than what I pay my nanny all to gain practical experience and make myself more marketable. The jobs aren't there and the law schools are being deceptive by implying that there are plenty of jobs and they pay big bucks.

* Thanks to PT-lawmom for the link.

Cafeteria Nazi

I went to have lunch with PS today, since it is her birthday and I was conveniently not working. The way they run the cafeteria drives me batty. Actually their disciplinary procedures do in general. At least three times while I was there the cafeteria nazi turned off the lights--meaning the kids can't talk. It's their friggin' lunch (half) hour. They are supposed to talk about all the things they aren't supposed to be chatting about while in class. These kids are in school 7 hours a day. They get lunch plus one 15 minute recess. It is absolutely ridiculous not to let them talk at lunch time.

Oh, and if they get in trouble at school, they lose their recess. Even my first graders--and the same last year when they were in full-day kindergarten. If they don't complete their work or have any disciplinary issues they lose recess. Did any of the geniuses who came up with this plan ever consider that perhaps if the kids had a chance to break for a little while they might be able to focus better--eliminating both the slow-work and the disciplinary problems? I am an adult, but I have to stop and regroup (like just getting up from my desk to go to the bathroom or to get a coke) after I have worked for a couple hours. When I come back I am always better focused. And yet we are expecting 6 year old kids to work for 3 hours and lose their only break if they start to get rowdy or work too slowly.

Can they not come up with a more creative punishment than taking away free time. I don't think recess is a reward--I think it is a necessity. And kids have to be able to chat during lunch if you don't want them chatting in class.

Speaking of...over lunch PS informed me that she had to write her name on the board for talking this morning. Honestly, I could not give a flying flip--she never, ever gets in trouble. It kind of makes me happy that she was misbehaving a little bit and not being miss goody-goody. (I know that sounds weird, but PS is very into following the rules, so much so that it almost makes her sort-of socially awkward.) I was also pleased that she felt ok telling me this--and not freaked out that she was going to be in trouble. I just told her to stay out of trouble for the rest of the day so she didn't lose any recess time. (I mean, I can't tell her that I didn't care that she got in trouble at school--I had to maintain my mom face, but I didn't make a big deal out of it.)

Nine

Today PS turns nine. It's hard to believe it has been that long since I first saw my fat happy baby. It was right about this time of the morning when my water burst all over the doctor's office--which DH still rates the #1 funniest thing he has ever seen in his life. Still didn't put PS in any big hurry to make her arrival, though. I had 8 hours on a pit drip and two and half hours of pushing before the doc finally had to vacuum her out. (I still have no hips at all, and she was an 8 lb. baby.)

So now she is nine and already acting like a moody, sulky pre-teen (shouldn't I have at least a couple more years?) I almost cut her party completely because of her bad attitude, but DH thought that was too harsh. So yesterday we went out to pick up supplies for her party this weekend. We had to stop by Petsmart for guinea pig bedding, and I made the mistake of letting her look at the kitties up for adoption. They had a litter of adorable, playful 7 week old kittens, and PS got to hold one of them.

PS has been asking for a cat for several weeks now and we have been resisting. Mainly because SS has asthma and both twins have allergies and we don't want to commit to an animal without knowing how they will react. They haven't really been around cats, so I don't know how they affect their allergies. Also, I am not thrilled with the idea of a litterbox in the house. It just seems like there's not a good place to put one.

So anyway, in a moment of weakness, seeing her with the sweet little kitten, I told PS that if she were willing to spend her birthday money on it, maybe her dad would reconsider letting her have a cat. Yeah, I know, nice of me to make him the heavy--and of course it still doesn't solve the potential allergy problem. (Although the lady in the adoption center said if you get a kitten and start giving them baths when they are little it will cut down on allergens. Makes sense--anyone know if it's true?) DH said no, and PS spent the rest of the day pouting and sulking. Which royally pissed me off, since I spent all day working on stuff for her party.

By the end of the day her attitude had improved, but this morning she was asking about getting a cat again--arrrggghhh.

So Happy It's the Weekend

I finally finished my project--yea! I am so glad to be done. I haven't heard yet if they have another project for me. The partner I am working with was out most of the week and said she would look over my stuff this week and get back to me by Monday. I hate not knowing what I will be doing next week.

Meanwhile, I had an interview yesterday morning with a DA's office in a mid-size suburb. I think the interview went well, but who knows. My mom status came out when the interviewer asked if I went straight from college to law school. But she has three kids, too, and we agreed that it probably worked out best to have kids before going to law school. And obviously she knows that you actually can be a good lawyer and have kids. Overall, I think we had a good rapport, but she said that she had 20 interviews for 2 positions, and many were my classmates. The bad news is that that suburb is far north, and my suburb is far east, and it took me an hour and a half to get there in morning traffic with no major snafu's. We would definitely have to move if that worked out--and selling our house in this market is not appealing.

Also yesterday I got a call for another interview. It is for a staff att'y position in the criminal courts in Big City. I think it would be great experience and probably a good jumping point to go to the DA's office or private practice.

Of course both of the above positions would be at least a 30% pay cut from what I am making right now as a temp. But I think that I would like what I was doing a lot more and have cushier hours. Besides, I still don't know exactly where this temp position is headed. At least some more doors are finally opening.

A Little Funny

The Dilbert Blog: Suing God

Mortification

Tonight PS brought home her writing notebook to finish a story that she had started. She also shared with us some of her other writing exercises, one was on her favorite memory.

"On my dad's birthday a lady dressed like a bunny came to our house and sang a song."

OMG--I nearly died. What must her teacher think?

Yes, it's true, for DH's 30th birthday I hired a singing telegram dressed like a playboy bunny. I very tame, non-risque bunny. The company I hired normally didn't even do that sort of thing, but when I explained what I wanted and that there would be children and grandparents present, they agreed. I did it because DH's mom did it for his dad for his 30th birthday (which is especially hilarious because DH's parents are veeerrrryyyy conservative). DH remembered his dad's bunny, and I thought it would be a fun tradition to carry on.

The look on DH's face when he opened the door to the bunny was priceless. We had already managed the huge surprise of a party--his family lives 300 miles away, so smuggling them all into town and getting him out of the house was tricky--and it was the icing on the cake.

On a sadder note, today is my baby brother's 30th. He still hasn't spoken to me since the Spring Break fiasco. I'm pretty pissed at him for not giving me so much as a phone call to congratulate me for, ya know, the whole law school thing. But maybe I'll try to be the bigger person and give him a call.

Today was a good day

I got moved into the office today. I was anticipating a cubicle buried deep in the bowels of the firm reminiscent of my last job.

Oh no, I got a real office. With a view!!! I can see rooftop swimming pools from my office. And the cars below look like ants. And it was stocked with every color and size of post-its and binder clips and every other office supply I could ever imagine..

And they had a computer all set up for me. They had already set up an email account and put in a firm signature that designated me as "Attorney". (Ummm, can they do that? I'm pretty sure I can't call myself an attorney until I get my license. Might need to look into that.) And they sent in a trainer to teach me how to use their file management software and how to log into the servers from home. And I had to set up voicemail. I was so not expecting firm email and voicemail.

Oh and to top it off I got paid-woohoo! It is the biggest paycheck I have ever received in my entire life. It's nice to be a contributing member of society and to be getting paid to do it. But I am gonna be so brokenhearted if (look at me being optimistic!) they decide they don't need me anymore.

Heart Palpitations

I went to get the mail today and immediately noticed the return address for the Board of Law Examiners. Oh Crap! What did I do? Bar results aren't due for another 6 weeks. Maybe they let you know (really) early if you fail.

Whew! They were just making sure they had my name right for my law license. How nice of them to assume I was going to pass. Well, except for the little footnote at the bottom informing that if I did not pass, I would only have 3 weeks to register for the Feb. bar.

Movin' on up

When I picked up my assignment yesterday, pseudo-employer offered to set me up with a work space if I preferred to work in the office instead of at home. I told them I would consider it and get back to them. There were a lot of factors to consider and I wanted to discuss with DH.

Working downtown would mean the expense of childcare, the expense and hassle of commuting, paying for parking, planning for lunch, getting dressed in a suit which = dry cleaning expenses.

On the other hand, if I am in the office I am visible. They get to know me. I am more likely to get continuous assignments--and more importantly the potential for full-time employment. And they have hinted that this could be a possibility. The fact that they are willing to go to the trouble of setting me up with a work space seems to confirm this. Why would they bother for a 50 hour project?

I really think I would be an idiot not to work in the office just for the visibility aspect. And they pay me enough for one hour to cover my nanny for the day (since it's just after school care). Besides the added bonus of re-employing the nanny before she finds another position. Oh yeah--and I always wanted to work in a big, shiny building downtown.

So I told them that I wanted to accept their offer to start working in the office. They will let me know when my space is set up.

P.S. They were not concerned AT ALL with the number of hours I billed on the first part of the project. I was all worked up for nothing.

P.P.S. Yes, I know my colors still look like a psychedelic cat barfed on the screen. I'll try to deal with it this weekend. And, PT LawMom if you see this, please read my comment to your comment in the previous post.

Ummm, yeah...it's a work in progress.

But I don't have any more time to fiddle with it right now. And I haven't figured out how to do edits in blogger w/o making them live.

Tip o' the Day

Don't use the "next blog" feature in the Blogger header. I was thinking that my blog needed an updated look, so I wanted to browse a few blogs to look at their headers. Using the link above is a bad idea. On the third blog I browsed, VirusScan caught three viruses. Hope there weren't more that didn't get caught.

Well, I haven't been fired yet

Finally got a call late today. They need a few things clarified, but didn't say anything about how long I took. I will probably need to pick up additional documents tomorrow and then I can set to work on the rest of the task.

So this is good. I am back to having work to do--and making money isn't a bad bonus. Actually it's a really good bonus. PS is begging for a robot for her birthday later this month. I really, really want to get her the Lego Mindstorms set, but it is $250--much more than I was planning to spend. But it is educational and I know she would love it, and so I think I might be able to splurge with the extra income from this project.

Why I have a dead guinea pig in my freezer.

Last week PS's BFF and her little sister (same age as the twins) spent the night. They liked our guinea pig so much that they went out and bought out that very day (because apparently these parents are the type to buy animals on their children's whims). So BFF's mom called and asked me for tips on the newly acquired piggie. During the conversation I mentioned that we had another guinea pig that had gotten sick and died even after a trip to the vet and my diligent efforts to nurse it back to health.

So fastforward to this Saturday. DD goes to BFF's house for her birthday party. During the party DD calls and says, "Mom, BFF's guinea pig is sick, what do we do?" Yeah, because I am totally qualified to diagnose sick guinea pigs. I said, "Well, when yours was sick I held her to keep her warm and and fed her with a syringe." So BFF's mom gets on the phone and says, "What do I do, here eyes are closing...oh no, I think she's gone. Yeah, she's getting stiff now."

Yes, the guinea pig died in the middle of the little girl's birthday party, in front of a whole room full of little girls. Kinda put a damper on the whole party.

So, since the guinea pig was purchased last week, BFF's mom can return her to get a refund or replacement. But she needs to be frozen in the meantime. BFF's mom has only the freezer attached to the fridge. It's full and she doesn't want her girls finding it. So it's in my chest freezer, resting peacefully in a Hello Kitty shoe box.

Well, I sort of have a job

I had my interview for the contract position today. It was with a mid-size firm in a big shiny building with a fantastic view of downtown.

They started out saying, "If we decide to offer you the position," and ended by telling me to come back tomorrow at noon to sign an engagement and confidentiality agreement. But they only want me to do the first step of the project so that they can judge the quality of my work before going further. Can't blame them for that. I just hope I'm up to par--I've always been a little insecure about my writing (law school will do that to you) and they wanted someone with law review experience--not me.

The good news--it pays well. It gives me something to do. They might have more projects for me after this one. This could open other doors. And I can work from home in my jammies.

The bad news--I might screw this up. It's only temporary. It is going to be really boring. Because I am working from home, I don't need my nanny, and I am really worried that I am going to lose the nanny.

Because, you just can't sleep with a lizard.

That was my response to, "Why can't I sleep with Sticky?" Sticky is the tiny little Gecko that a friend brought over and the girls begged to keep. I found a Ball canning jar and poked holes in the top to make Sticky a temporary habitat. The girlies the took her (him? PS asked me to google gender identification in lizards, but I never got around to it) outside and caught three grasshoppers half the size of Sticky and added some woodchips (to climb on!) and grass.

When I went to tuck in TT, there was Sticky (and grasshoppers) sitting in the bed. I'm pretty open to critters in the house, but I draw the line at lizards in bed.

Oh, and the twins are asking to have their ears pierced. (There will be no pigeon-holing them as girlie-girls or tomboys. They are an awesome mix of both.) I'm not sure how I feel about this. I am very much against piercing babies. But they aren't babies anymore. I had mine pierced when I was just a little older than they are now, and it worked out ok. But I rarely ever wear earrings now--or any other jewelery for that matter, drives DH crazy that I don't wear my wedding ring. Still, it seems like such a big girl thing. And it is poking holes in their bodies--permanently!

PS meanwhile has absolutely no interest in piercing anything. She doesn't want to have anything to do with anything that causes pain. Smart girl.

Thanks Bob

In a fit of excitement last night, Bob managed to land a paw right on my face with the full force of his 50 lb. doggie body behind it. I now have two lovely red welts going down my right cheekbone.

So no, I haven't been blogging because I have in fact been wallowing. I seriously sit on my ass all day. On Wednesday I slept til noon. Well, I got up and fixed the girls' breakfast and did their hair, and then went back to sleep once they left for school. I never sleep past 7:30--what is that about?

I have an interview next week for a temp job. It is a short term project, but it pays well. The only problem is that I may have slightly exaggerated my qualifications for this position. When I said that I had experience drafting Daubert motions in products liability cases. I have actually drafted one Daubert motion for one products liability case. But it was a multi-party case with multiple experts all rolled into one motion.

I'm really not one to exaggerate my abilities. I don't know what came over me. My biggest problem is usually that I am too honest. Anyway, we'll see if I can make it through another interview without screwing it up. Meanwhile, I will be researching this weekend to make sure I don't look like an idiot if they start quizzing me about my experience. Which would be a lot easier if I still had Westlaw/Lexis access.

What I'm reading

In response to Zuska's recommended reading, I thought I'd post what I've been reading and what's on my to-do list. Since the bar I have read:

Harry Potter--of course, and I loved it.

Daisy Fay and the Miracle Man by Fannie Flagg (of Fried Green Tomatoes fame). Fannie Flagg is always good for a hilarious, lite read. This was no exception.

I Don't Know How She Does It by Allison Pearson. Just finished this one. It was a hilarious and honest look at balancing work and motherhood. I really liked this book, but didn't care for the ending.

On my nightstand:


Boomsday by Christopher Buckley. Found it at the library and picked it up because it is by the author of Thank You for Smoking and that movie was great.


The Supreme Court: The Personalities and Rivalries that Defined America by Jeffrey Rosen. Just in case I feel like reading something lawyerly


Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier. Because is was only a buck at the used bookstore and it's supposed to be good.


The Mammoth Cheese by Sheri Holman. Another $1 book, and the title intrigued me.


And finally, read recently (as in within the last year):

Atonement by Ian McEan. I really liked this book and could totally see it becoming a movie when I read it (which it is now.) I had previously read Saturday by McEwan and almost gave up. Saturday was very slow going, but finally picked up about 2/3 of the way through and ended up ok. Atonement kept a much better pace.

And if you prefer something trashy:

The Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. This is my dirty little secret--I am seriously embarrassed to admit reading these books. But they are freaking hilarious. And it was nice to have something lite and easy to wind down with after studying all day. I can easily knock out one of these books in just a couple of hours. But I don't recommend anything else by this author. My mom left me a book not from this series and it was the absolute most ridiculous thing I have ever read.

So, this is what I did today

I started to wallow, but a friend that I haven't spoken with in forever called and that seemed to pull me out of my funk.

So, then I did this...

The line is from stitching the two images together because I don't happen to have a 12' X 12' scanner. This is the first time I have scrapped in about 8 months, and the picture is old because I don't think I have had prints made since Christmas.

And then I did this...

Because I though the girls needed freshly baked cookies to celebrate the first day of school. And so they came home and we sat and ate cookies and talked about their day and it was nice.

And then I applied for the only new job that I have found today.

And here is my current game plan. If nothing is happening by the end of this week, I am going to email all of the firms in my town seeking temp work. There are only a dozen or so firms here, and they are all small or solos. Is that too weird? I have never done the blast resume thing, because I don't think it's particularly efficient or effective. But I think it could work since this is a small suburb fairly remote from the city.

What am I supposed to do now?

The girlies started school today. And I am home. I am not accustomed to being home alone. All day long. I don't know what to do with myself. I guess there's always more painting, organizing and cleaning. But my house is more organized that it has been since I moved in. And the laundry is caught up. (That is a miracle around here. Laundry is the bane of my existence.)

I really thought I'd have a job by now. I have pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I will not find an attorney position before bar results. So now I am looking for any kind of temporary or contract legal work. I don't really care as long as it gets me out of the house. If I stay here I will wallow.

I am angry. I am angry at the Career Services Office for doing so little to help the 80% of us not in the top 20%. It seems like the only thing they manage is to organize OCR. I am angry at everyone in the law school for not warning us. For not telling us ahead of time that we would not have jobs on graduation--that we would not be able to get jobs for a full 6 months after graduation. For not telling us that we would be on our own in finding a job if we don't make the OCR cut. I am angry that they misrepresented starting salaries. According to my school, the starting salary in private practice is $90K. In reality, the starting salary at a small firm or in government is $50K or less. A mid-size firm might net you $80K. The large firm salaries are so elevated that they skew the rest of the results.

I know my blog is a downer lately. But I do this more for me than for you. I want to be able to one day look back at this emotional rollercoaster--and hopefully laugh. And at least for now, venting helps a little bit.

I am Betty Freakin' Crocker

Last night I had to make banana chocolate-chip muffins with crumb topping because I had not yet managed to haul my butt to the grocery store and my poor starving children would have nothing for breakfast. Yes, they are as delicious as they sound.

Today I finally made it to the store. In anticipation of someday being employed, I am experimenting with bulk cooking. We got in the habit of eating out way too much while I was in school, and it was good for neither our health nor our budget. So while I have all this leisure time, I am trying to stock up.

Last week I cooked up 3 lbs. of ground beef with onion and then froze meal-size bags flat in the freezer. (Flat defrosts quicker.) I can have a meal on the table in 15 minutes by defrosting the beef to throw into spaghetti sauce, mexican pile-up, goulash, etc.

Today I bought 6 lbs of chicken breast. I kept one lb out and have it sitting in a marinade for sesame chicken tonight--yum. The other 5 lbs are in the crockpot with about a cup of broth, and onion and some pepper. I'll freeze part of it as is to go into pasta, salads or other quick dinners. The rest I am making into chicken pot pie (I have a yummy and easy chicken pot pie recipe), chicken enchiladas, and chicken spaghetti to be frozen and defrosted later. I bought aluminum pans to put them in so that I can have the nanny put them directly in the oven (again assuming I ever have a job).

I'll probably spend about 2 hours preparing meals today (plus the half hour I already spent), but I'll have one meal on the table, three in the freezer and at least 5 packets of cooked meat for a quick dinner. Some people do this once a month, and it is an all day event. You can google OAMC or Once A Month Cooking for recipes, but I found that a lot of them are full or cream soups and cheese and other artery clogging ingredients. Pretty much anything you can freeze will work, and I prefer to use my own tried and true recipes.

My husband is the Supreme Awsome Computer Geek of the Universe

I have been having trouble with the power jack on my laptop for awhile. I had to contort the cord into all sorts of weird positions to get it to connect inside the jack. Two nights ago I had the cord strung up through my toes to maintain tension while the battery charged. It was not pretty.

I tried replacing the cord, but it didn't help. The problem was in the jack. Unfortunately, the power jack is soldered into the motherboard and replacing it is not nearly as easy as it should be.

Yesterday it quit working completely. No matter how I tried to position the cord I couldn't get any power, and of course, the battery was dead. My laptop was rendered a worthless rock with all my very valuable data (like links to everyone else's blogs) trapped inside.

But DH came to my rescue. He salvaged the power jack from the motherboard I blew up. Then he spent all night breaking my computer down into a hundred million little pieces. Seriously, this stupid tiny little part (about 1 square cm) could not be any more difficult to get to. It took 10 minutes to replace the part and 3 hours to take my laptop apart and put it back together.

And somehow, miraculously, it worked. I no longer have to string my power cord up through my toes. And there were only three screws left over.

BItchfest

So I received a response back from my thank you email, which sounded pretty much like a blow off. They were very polite and told me what a great asset I will be to the legal community and wished my luck on my bar results. Which seems to imply that 1) they do not intend to see me again before bar results; and 2) they do not think I will be a great asset for their firm.

So it is back to job hunting (as if I ever really stopped). I am trying very hard not to fall into the depths of depression and self-pity. It is hard not to think that I made a terrible, terrible mistake. My family was doing fine before I decided to flit off to law school. If I am not employed by the time my loans come due things will be very, very bad. I thought that I would be making things better for my family, but from where I sit right now, I have only made things worse.

And the optomists are bugging the shit out of me. The perfect job just hasn't come along yet--it will all work out. How do you know that? How do you know that I won't get stuck in some crappy-ass job that I hate because it is the only job that I can get? I actually liked law school, and there are several areas of the law that I would really enjoy wroking in. But none of them seem to be heading my way.

I have applied for about 40 jobs since late March. Since then I have had 2 interviews. How am I ever going to get my foot in the door at this rate? Once the kids are back in school next week I will start looking for contract work.

Let's talk about $ex, baby

Oh yes, tonight we had The $ex* Talk. Because PS's BFF's mom informed me today that after the girls' sleepover last week she found a spiral full of pen1s drawings. I so did not know we were there yet. PS doesn't even turn 9 until next month, but most of her friends will be 10 in the next few months. And I'm so protective about what she is exposed to. But all three girls have been fascinated with pen1ses since we got Bob. (The dog--and he gets excited a lot.) FortunatelyBFF's mom was cool about it and we both chalked it up to normal curiosity. But we both thought that we should talk to the girls to make sure that they understood $ex and anatomy on our terms.

We were going to the library anyway, so I picked up a book. I had bought PS "The Care and Keeping of You" about a year ago, which is an excellent resource for explaining a girl's changing body. But I needed something that went a little further to explain pen1ses and $ex. The book I found had lots of drawings demonstrating how your body changes during puberty, how a pen1s works, and how $ex works.

Overall I think it went well. Until we got to the page about contraception. I explained that that is what you used if you were going to have $ex but didn't want to have a baby. PS asked, completely bewildered, "But why would you want to do that?" To which I responded, "Because sex is fun." And then I had to add, "But you should not have sex until you find someone that you really love." She then informed me, "Destiny told me her parent's aren't married." And I had to explain that you don't have to be married to have sex or have babies, but most people think that you should be. The most important thing is that you do it with someone that you love.

I refuse to demand abstinence or preach waiting until marriage. For one thing, it's just not realistic. But I hope that by being honest and keeping the lines of communication open with my daughters they will talk to me when these issues arise. At least I know I am doing better than my mom. My $ex talk, when I was 17, consisted of "be sure you have $ex with lots of men before you get married so that you can make sure you are $exually compatible with your husband." That is some damn awesome parenting.

*I'm not a prude, just trying to avoid the perv hits.

I don't know

How my interview went, that is.

It did not start off well. First, no one knew I was coming. The HR manager with whom I was corresponding claimed I never confirmed. Umm, yes I did and I have the email to prove it.

But I still got to meet with the department head, and the interview went pretty well. The position is with a mid-size civil litigation firm that is expanding into family law. Family law isn't my top choice, but at least I would get some litigation experience, and at this point I'm not too picky. And I have experience in family law. This firm wanted an experienced attorney, but the department head said that the experience I had was great and shouldn't be an issue.

She also seemed impressed with my psych background, which actually is sort of useful for family law. Her main concern was finding someone who felt comfortable interviewing clients.

So everything was going great and I though we were getting along well. Until she asked what I wanted--like salary or hours. And I made the mistake of telling the truth. I said that I was willing to compromise a higher salary for lifestyle and that I would like to have dinner with my family more often than not. I emphasized that I was perfectly willing to do what was needed from home after my kids were in bed, but I think that I had already sunk my ship. Heaven forbid that there is an attorney who wants to be home by 6:00 pm at least 3 nights a week. I think they tricked me--all their talk of how family friendly they were. And I got too comfortable and fell for it. I should know better by now.

So anyway, she said that I would have to have a second interview with a partner before any decisions were made, and that the HR manager should contact me within a few days. I guess we'll see. Meanwhile, I sent a follow-up email trying to clean up all the messes without making it look like that was what I was doing.

Jesus Saves*

But apparently I do not. I drafted several documents for my last job that I knew would be good samples for me to use later, or writing samples (properly edited, of course) if necessary. I saved them all on a flash drive, which I cannot find anywhere. This is the problem with technology getting smaller--you can't find it if you lose it. WWJD? Back up the damn flash drive onto something that can't get lost.

My problem is that I do not have a good writing sample. I have an interview tomorrow and although they have not asked, I wanted to have a writing sample available just in case. My best sample is a memo I wrote for an international law course. Unfortunately, we were working in conjunction with the DOJ and signed confidentiality agreements stating that we would not even discuss subject matter of our papers. It was tough research, I worked hard and made a good grade. The most infuriating part is that the point of the paper is now completely moot--the issue has been very publicly resolved. But I'm still thinking I can't use that memo.

Everything else I have is crap. I did a response to a MSJ for the DA's office. But looking back it is terrible. My arguments were good, but the style was terrible. I was using a sample from an old form book (it's the government, you didn't get to use Westlaw unless you had a darn good reason.)

I have a couple of very basic motions that I drafted for my clinic, but I don't think they will be helpful. It didn't occur to me to keep anything I did in my first job.

Argh. I hope DH can miraculously find the flash drive tonight. I'm pretty sure I let him borrow it and haven't seen it since.

Oh yeah, and in case you were wondering, the concert was great. It was nice to get out.

*Jesus and Satan have a discussion as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest, with God as the judge. They sit themselves at their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight. Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show what he has come up with. Satan is visibly upset, and cries, "I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out." "Very well, then," says God, "let us see if Jesus fared any better." Jesus enters a command, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers. Satan is astonished. He stutters, "B-b-but how? I lost everything, yet Jesus' program is intact. How did he do it?" God smiled all-knowingly, "Jesus saves."

See you at the show

DH and I are going out tonight--yea! I bought him concert tickets for his b-day--which was right before the bar, so not much celebrating then. He is out with the girls getting them a movie and Happy Meals for their night in with the sitter. Why do I always feel the need to bribe my children when I go out? It's not like they care, they are just thrilled to see the nanny again. DH and I only go out alone maybe 2-3 times a year (something we really need to work on), so it's not like this is a regular thing. I guess I just feel like they should get a treat if we are going to be out having fun.

Why yes, I do have too much time on my hands

I did the Superhero Quiz, mostly because my girls are so into superheroes. But this is a fairly accurate description. I have become so used to going 100 mph that I don't know how to slow down. Since getting back from my post-bar trip, I have been cleaning, organizing and of course painting. Oh yeah, and I do find superheroes kinda boring. But I am kinda bummed that I got such a boring superpower. I always wanted to be invisible.

Your Superpower Should Be Super Speed

You're quick witted and fast to act. You're mind works at warp speed. From your perspective, everyone else is living in slow motion. You get so much done, people have accused you of not sleeping. Definitely not a couch potato, you feel a bit crazy if you're not busy doing something. Why you would be a good superhero: You're be the first on the scene... and likely to finish the job before anyone else shows up Your biggest problem as a superhero: Being bored by everyone else. Including other superheroes!

What Should Your Superpower Be?

Bowling Zen

Took the day off from painting yesterday. The girls were going stir-crazy and I though they needed to have some fun since there is only one week of summer left before school starts. We wracked our brains for something fun to do. It has been 104 outside all week, so outdoor activities were not happening. No kid movies we wanted to see at the local theater. Tried to talk them into the art museum, but the twins thought it would be boring. They wanted to go to the Science museum, but there is a special exhibit that DH wants to see so we wanted to wait for him. Finally, I spotted free passes to the bowling alley sitting on top of the microwave. The kids thought it sounded like great fun, and with free passes it would be pretty cheap.

I bowl maybe once every two years and I have never been very good. I am lucky to hit 100. But something overtook me and I suddenly became a good bowler. I was sending them straight down the middle of the lane every single time. I had three strikes and two spares. (Maybe that's not too impressive, but it is really good for me.)

This was especially entertaining because a 20-something single guy took the lane next to us. He seemed amused at our group of girls trying to bowl. He was trying to show off, sort of pitching his ball down the lane. And I was kicking his ass. I think he got embarrassed, because he started off friendly but he got quieter and quieter as I continued to out-bowl him.

We are now considering joining a family bowling league. How cheesy is that? We would so not be competitive (the kids were really terrible), but it would be a fun family thing, I think.

Can you hear the sound of hysteria?

I love the "real" version of this song, but this is freakin' hilarious!

My kids apparently have not read Tom Sawyer

They seem to think painting is fun and keep pestering me to let them help. Two six year olds and an 8 year old are hardly helpful. Well, the 8 y.o. is somewhat helpful, but the little ones are just in the way.

Meanwhile, it's a darn good thing I went to law school, because I do not have a future as a painter. I am the sloppiest painter ever. And I don't mean the paint on the walls--I mean the paint that I get everywhere else. My hands are covered in primer and it won't come off. Last night the bottoms of my feet were completely covered--how the heck did that happen?

I'm having to prime all of the walls because they are disgusting. Seriously, you would think that we live in absolute filth by looking only at the walls. There is a continuous streak of grime 2 1/2' from the ground. Apparently small children cannot walk through a room without running their hands along the wall.

So I am already tired of painting and I have a lot left. It will take at least the rest of this week and probably a good part of next week, too. If I were smart I would have waited until I had a job and paid someone to do this. But I just couldn't take the grime (or sitting home doing nothing.)

P.S. I have an interview next week. Trying not to get too excited. Seems unlikely that something would come of my first interview.

Arghhhhh!

So I had been corresponding over the weekend with a firm that claimed to have a contract attorney position. They asked me to call this morning, so I did. It turns out that their contract position was not a contract position at all. It was office sharing. I would pay them for space in their offices. The would not pay me at all, but I would get referrals for whatever walked through the door that was not in anybody else's area of practice. I would essentially be going solo.

I am a little irritated. I would not have pursued this if they had plainly stated it was an office sharing arrangement. I think they were misleading in advertising this as a contract position. Although I have considered something similar as my emergency backup plan, I really feel like I need some experience and a regular paycheck right now. And I couldn't do this until November anyway (which they knew). And if I were going to do an office sharing arrangement, it would not be 40 miles from my home.

Stupidheads!

My Week in Review

So posting is spotty because, as previously mentioned, my life is boring now. But in the last week I have:

• Returned to the human race. The bar turned me into a troll. Virtually every part of my body needed to be shaved, waxed or depilitated (is that a word?). I had 3 inches of roots to be colored. My feet were so rough they were catching on the sheets at night. So earlier in the week the girls and I did mani/pedi's while watching Bridge to Terebithia.* My feet are now smooth and my toes are Hot Magenta. The next night I colored my hair and did the routine eyebrow wax while the color set. I am overly blessed in the eyebrow area. Think Brooke Shields in 1983. I swear I always look like I've had a face lift when my brows are done. And whole head is the same color again, and those pesky greys have gone back into hiding.
• Bought school supplies. 4 stores. $150.
• Bought Webkinz. 4 stores. $35. And I am an awesome mom because as soon as DD's friends have come trickling in from their vacations, their first question is, "What Webkinz do you have?"
• Cleaned. The junk drawer, the pantry, the spice cabinet (2 jars of ginger, 2 jars of poppy seeds, 3 jars of cloves. I never cook with any of these things), my bedroom, most of the downstairs.
• Lost 3 lbs. With minimal effort. But I purged the house of all the bad stuff. And by purging I mean I ate the last 1/3 of the box of oreos and the last 1/2 of the ice cream.
• Job Hunted. 15 resumes. 1 rejection. 1 nibble. (A contract position that would be a long commute so not necessarily a good thing.) 1 job that I would really like and that I am really well qualified for and doesn't require bar.
• Bought Primer and a Sample of Paint. I figured as long as I am unemployed I would paint the downstairs. I am now in knee deep because I have 1' test patches of "dapper tan" on various walls. My house is an open floor plan so I have to do the whole downstairs in one swoop. 1500 sq. ft. of wall by my (probably incorrect) calculation.

* Bridge to Terebithia was a pretty good movie standing on its own. And it was a decent interpretation of the book. I was very skeptical going in because Bridge to Terebithia was my favorite book as a child. The movie previews led me to believe that they had massacred the book. But other than taking great liberties with the imaginary Terebithia and modernizing the setting, the movie stayed pretty true to the book.

I feel so loved

The girls keep asking me when Lucy is coming back. Lucy is the nanny. I should probably be offended by this, but I am pretty sure they are only asking because I make them do chores, eat their veggies, and limit tv time to 30 minutes a day.

On the bright side, it's nice to know the kids love their caregiver. She is like a grandmother to them. I just hope she doesn't find another job while I am looking for a job. One more reason why I really need to start working.

Why knew Lysol had so many uses?

Lysol douche ad, 1928, at MUM All I have to say is, "ouch!"

The trials of the unemployed

I have spent the last three hours applying for jobs. I have applied to a grand total of -------5 jobs. Job hunting takes forever. I researched and compiled a list of about 20 jobs last night. So today all I have to do is minor edits to my stock cover letters and fax, print or email. Ha! There is a lot more faxing and printing than emailing. Why oh why is it so hard for lawyers to accept the virtues of email? I can dash off an email in literally 1/5 the time it takes to fax. Perhaps I am just inept, but it takes forever for me to send a doc through the fax wizard. Even good old fashioned printing takes less time.

Maybe by the end of the day I'll have my 20 resumes out. Or maybe the end of the week.

My life is boring now

I feel like I have regressed back to being a SAHM. I've had that life, and I was happy to be home with my children when they were young, but I would never want to go back to that. Today I went to the pet store for critter food and then the grocery store. I will start cooking again. I also started looking into a weight loss plan and joined sparkpeople.com. I gained about 10 lbs. while in law school, and when I started I was still carrying around 10 lbs of baby weight. I am hoping to drop about 20 lbs. by the time bar results come out in November. So this is my life now--with entirely too much focus on food.

I am thrilled to have time with the kids before joining the real world, but my elation is really dampened by not knowing exactly when I will be rejoining the real world. I am purposeless right now and I hate it. I don't exactly want a job that starts tomorrow, but I would love to know that I had a job waiting within the next few weeks. There is absolutely no way that I can wait until November to start working. I am ready to start the next phase of my life. I am done with law school and the bar (hopefully), and I am ready to move on. I hate this empty limbo purgatory phase.

I know this post sounds whiny. It is really more frustrated than whiny. I loved law school and I love practicing law. I just want to get started.

Back to Reality

Despite my whining about not getting to take an exotic vacation, my post-bar trip was perfect. We took off to the cabin that my grandfather built shortly before I was born. I spent most of my childhood vacations there, but haven't been in at least 10 years. But I felt like I had never left, and still knew exactly where to find all the secret spots I loved as a kid. It was so much fun to show my kids the place I loved so much growing up.

The cabin is in a remote area, 30 miles and an hour drive from the nearest town. It is nestled into the side of a mountain, overlooking a valley with a small pond. There are a dozen or so other cabins in the area, but most were unoccupied while we were there, so we had the whole mountainside while we were there. Two of the girls and I caught our first fish (and we squealed like little girls when we did--we are not exactly outdoorsy), and we hiked to the top of the mountain. We also hiked to a tiny hidden cemetery where nearly all of the graves are more than 100 years old.

There was no tv or cell phone reception. I didn't even bother taking my laptop. It was the perfect post-bar trip. Completely stress-free and relaxing.

Next week I re-start the job search, deep clean my house, and start preparing for the kiddos to go back to school.

Finally made it to the dentist

Yes, I did have an abscess--which I had pretty much figured out. Nothing else hurts that much. I'd rather give birth again. The root was dead and the tooth was necrotic. I don't know how something that is dead can hurt so much. And the Dentist had just seen me twice within the last 6 weeks about that very tooth. I'm thinking he missed something, but he was so nice and accommodating that I didn't call him out on it. I think I am tired of being in cranky lawyer mode.

Anyway the dentist did a partial root canal and will finish the job in a couple of weeks after we get back from our trip. The root canal wasn't too bad. But the numbness hasn't worn off yet. On the bright side, I got even better pain meds. And two new antibiotics, since the last one didn't do anything for the infection.

So I got to combine two of the most painful experiences of my life. Yea me. Years from now I will be telling all the newbies, "Yeah you think you had it tough, I took the bar with an abscessed tooth."

It's over

I was more than a little concerned after the morning session. The bar examiners were playing curel mind games with us. We are supposed to have 12 essays. 2 wills, 2 UCC, 2 family law, 2 business associations, 2 property (1 usually oil & gas), 1 consumer law & 1 trusts or guardianships. The essays are always given in pairs with the two odd ones together.

When I opened my essay booklet I had no freakin' clue what area of law it was testing. That seemed like a bad sign. But I had the common sense to look at the next question to determine what the pair was. The next question was consumer law. So the first should have been trusts or guardianships. It was definitely not a trusts or guardianships. I put it aside and did the other 5 questions. They were strange. Odd details. The damn commercial paper question didn't ask about holder in due course or negotiability--which are about the only things I have to say about commercial paper. The other UCC was all about repossession--I think I did ok, but I'm not sure I hit all the notice requirements. The first property question left me completely clueless--I answered it like a contract question (it was about an option on a land contract). I was thrilled to see an oil & gas question. At least I understand and can answer oil and gas. Finally got back to the initial mystery question and determined it was about agency. WTF? Agency isn't supposed to be paired with consumer law.

The afternoon session went much better. I felt really comfortable with all of the essays. Nothing crazy like this morning. But no trusts/guardianship questions. As I was leaving, a girl I didn't know said, "Wasn't there supposed to be a trusts or guardianship question on here? There wasn't was there?" No apparently the bar examiners just wanted to screw with us.

Now I am exhausted. I will veg until I pass out. Tomorrow I may sleep till noon. I am so ready to disappear to the mountains--no TV, no internet, no cell phones (but running water and electricity, I'm not crazy). Just me and HP (oh yeah and the family--I missed my little rugrats!)

Just a little PSA

Thanks to Alexis for the tip. I thought this warning was worth passing along. Be careful what you blog.

The MBE, she is a bitch

I thought the morning session was really tough. But maybe its because I was a little bleary eyed. I did not sleep at all last night. I was having major dental pain, despite taking pain meds way more often than I was supposed to. I think I'm becoming an addict.

The afternoon session went much better, but it's so hard to guess how you did on the damn thing.

Tomorrow, 12 essays. This is what has me the most concerned. I have lost all my cockiness of last week. The wait until November is going to be hell.

I'm ready to be done with the crappy hotel and return home. I have a dentist appointment on Friday. We are supposed to be heading to my grandfather's cabin in the middle of nowhere on Saturday--I guess we'll see what the dentist does to me.

I Survived Day 1

The MPT went better than expected. I put minimal time into preparing for it, but I think I did ok. The biggest problem was time management which I think was universal because one issue had several factors to analyze. No one left early.

The P&E was harder than I anticipated. A few of the questions seemed to fall out of the clear blue sky. I had worked several practice P&E's and had not seen anything like them. I know I got at least 75% right. Since it's short answer, it's pretty easy to gauge how you did--unlike the MBE where you have no freaking clue.

My plan was to go back to my room and review for tomorrows MBE. I had the choice of studying from the uncomfortable sofa, the desk with the too short chair, or the big comfy bed. Of course I chose the big comfy bed. And fell right to sleep. I don't feel too badly about it because I didn't sleep great last night. We are about 5 miles from an airport, and apparently all southbound planes pass directly overhead. And there is a train somewhere that went by at least 5 times last night--and I swear blew its horn for five minutes each time. And I am walking distance from a baseball stadium. And there was a game last night. And apparently everyone likes to blow their horns when they leave. So anyway, I figure the nap was well deserved, and I'll blog while I shake off the grogginess.

But to put things into perspective, on this day 6 years ago I made this, which is a far greater accomplishment than even passing the bar could be:

Good Luck to all the other bar takers

I am now tucked away in my bar hotel. We start tomorrow with a half day of MPT and Procedure & Evidence. It is sort of surreal that it is finally here.

I had previously complained that they started us off with the easiest stuff and a half day only to wind up day three with a full day of essays. But now I am kind of glad they are easing us into it. I am not too freaked out about tomorrow. And I am glad that I have that half day in the solace of my hotel to catch up since I was out of it all weekend.

Ugh. I can totally hear the guy in the room next to me peeing. Now I am going to be paranoid every time I have to go. I am so not impressed with this hotel. But at least it has free internet.

My life sucks

Still in a lot of pain. I do not know what is going on, but I guess I am going to have to actually see the dentist in the morning. I don't know what that is going to accomplish because there is absolutely no way on earth I am undergoing any kind of dental procedure tomorrow. Meanwhile, I am still popping pain pills which is causing me to sleep half the day. I have not worked any practice problems in two days, but I have gone through every single one of my 700 or so flashcards.

I am trying to convince myself that since I have treated this like a marathon I should be adequately prepared despite my inability to function the last two days. I usually find comfort in numbers, and this is what I am relying on right now.

My state's bar passage rate for first-timers: 80%
My school's bar passage rate: 90%
Bar passage rate is highly correlative to quality of school and grades.
I have put in about 400 hours of preparation (including time sitting in barbri).
I have worked about 1500 MBE's.
I have worked about 75 essays.
I have read the whole dang conviser.
I went to all barbri lectures.
I reviewed and condensed notes from lectures into flashcards and flowcharts.
I am averaging about 80% on practice MBE's.

I am praying all that is enough. I am terrified that because the last minute push never happened it will kill me. I am also terrified that I will be in major pain when I take the test because I can't take pain medication. My biggest fear has always been that I would get some mystery illness when the time came.

Yeah, I know my blog has been an emotional roller coaster for the last few weeks. And now it sounds like I've gone off the deep end. Hopefully in a couple of weeks I will return to normal and not the emotional ranty bitchy whiner of the last two months.

Feeling a bit better

My dentist does not keep Saturday hours but I called his emergency number. He wasn't even in town, but called me in antibiotics and pain pills. The pain is finally under control, but I am so sleepy. TT and I just took a 2 hour nap on the sofa. Not exactly helping with my studying, but I'm hoping that the much needed rest is almost as valuable as studying. I haven't slept in weeks. When I get stressed I have crazy hallucinogenic dreams. At least 3-4 times a night I wake up sitting straight up in bed thinking that I am fighting something off.

Hopefully by tomorrow the antibiotics will have kicked in and I can lay off the pain pills. (I did not inform my dentist that I had already started antibiotics from an old prescription that I had never finished. Fortunately he prescribed exactly the same thing. Yeah, I know that's bad and that you are supposed to take the whole thing--but I have a terrible time remembering to take pills.)

Meanwhile, I have decided that this whole episode is psychosomatic. It seems every time I get really stressed I get some kind of an ailment. Like my last round of finals where I had three back to back and developed the worst migraine of my life. I really hope that I am right about the psychosomatic thing, because if not I am pretty sure I am going to need a root canal. The pain is stemming from a tooth that was recently filled for the second time and is waiting for a crown once I am done with orthodontics.