And today, that's how long I have been married.
I've made more than a few bad decisions in my life, but I seemed to do pretty well with picking a spouse. Actually, it's something of a miracle that I managed to find someone who's willing to put up with me!
We're keeping it low-key this year--since we been lucky enough to have a few kid-free nights out in recent weeks and, quite frankly, we're tired of spending money. But we'll go to dinner with the rugrats tonight and a lovely bouquet just arrived at my front door.
12/30/08
Can't a girl take a day off?
So I took off from Christmas Eve through New Year's Day. Litigation tends to be slow during the holidays, and I know that January is already shaping up to be quite hectic. So I thought I'd take the opportunity to hang out with my girlies (and save the cash that full-day child care would cost.)
But I have received a flurry of emails over the last two days. I think Big Boss is freaking out because because his paralegal and I are both out of the office. Most of the emails that he has sent involve issues that are fully under control. We have no firm deadlines until mid-January--although I assured him last week that I would have preliminary drafts ready by Jan 5.
Hopefully my email reassurances are sufficient to convince him that all is well.
But I have received a flurry of emails over the last two days. I think Big Boss is freaking out because because his paralegal and I are both out of the office. Most of the emails that he has sent involve issues that are fully under control. We have no firm deadlines until mid-January--although I assured him last week that I would have preliminary drafts ready by Jan 5.
Hopefully my email reassurances are sufficient to convince him that all is well.
12/29/08
Home Sweet Home
We survived the trip to Hometown and it was a whirlwind. We spent Friday night with DH's sibs, Saturday morning and afternoon with my dad's family and Saturday night with my mother. Sunday morning we hung out with DH's parents and his sister who was home with a sick baby on Friday, then visited with my mom's parents before heading out of town.
Saturday was my Grandfather's 81st birthday and it was the first time he has had all of his kids, grands and greats together. I don't think he could have been any happier. My dad and his sister hate each other, so we don't have big family get togethers. (My dad was subpoenaed to testify against his sister's husband before the grand jury, which led to the husband's (white-collar) felony indictment and eventual conviction and vacation to the federal pen. She blames my dad--and I don't think my dad was too fond of her before all of this.)
I got to see my cousin, who is the same age as me. We were great friends as kids, but grew apart as teens and rarely see each other now. We used to torment my grandmother endlessly. Interestingly, we both ended up having identical twin girls. My cousin said it was our punishment for what we used to do to my grandmother. Maybe she's right. The two sets of twins had great fun playing together--it's too bad they don't get to see each other more.
We were supposed to stay through Monday, but MIL looked so worn out that we took off Sunday afternoon instead. Apparently she was feeling much better last Tuesday, but once she acclimated to her new medication, she hasn't felt quite as good. And although the docs have ruled out cancer, they still haven't figured out what is causing her problem and she is still in a lot of pain. (I tried to gently suggest a second opinion, but MIL and FIL are very protective of their doctors. I think they are of the generation that believes doctors are always right and are still somewhat intimidated by them. Sigh.)
Anyway, we were trying to be helpful by giving MIL some peace since I know she was overdoing it while we were there and the kids were pretty wound up--but she cried when we left and made me feel like an ogre.
We also brought back my niece who is the same age as the twins. Her dad has to travel a lot and got stuck at the airport and couldn't make it home for Christmas. She was taking it hard, and we thought some time with her cousins might take her mind off not getting to see her dad. The girls have been playing Guitar Hero world tour since we got home (like Rockband), and they are hilarious.
Saturday was my Grandfather's 81st birthday and it was the first time he has had all of his kids, grands and greats together. I don't think he could have been any happier. My dad and his sister hate each other, so we don't have big family get togethers. (My dad was subpoenaed to testify against his sister's husband before the grand jury, which led to the husband's (white-collar) felony indictment and eventual conviction and vacation to the federal pen. She blames my dad--and I don't think my dad was too fond of her before all of this.)
I got to see my cousin, who is the same age as me. We were great friends as kids, but grew apart as teens and rarely see each other now. We used to torment my grandmother endlessly. Interestingly, we both ended up having identical twin girls. My cousin said it was our punishment for what we used to do to my grandmother. Maybe she's right. The two sets of twins had great fun playing together--it's too bad they don't get to see each other more.
We were supposed to stay through Monday, but MIL looked so worn out that we took off Sunday afternoon instead. Apparently she was feeling much better last Tuesday, but once she acclimated to her new medication, she hasn't felt quite as good. And although the docs have ruled out cancer, they still haven't figured out what is causing her problem and she is still in a lot of pain. (I tried to gently suggest a second opinion, but MIL and FIL are very protective of their doctors. I think they are of the generation that believes doctors are always right and are still somewhat intimidated by them. Sigh.)
Anyway, we were trying to be helpful by giving MIL some peace since I know she was overdoing it while we were there and the kids were pretty wound up--but she cried when we left and made me feel like an ogre.
We also brought back my niece who is the same age as the twins. Her dad has to travel a lot and got stuck at the airport and couldn't make it home for Christmas. She was taking it hard, and we thought some time with her cousins might take her mind off not getting to see her dad. The girls have been playing Guitar Hero world tour since we got home (like Rockband), and they are hilarious.
12/25/08
Merry Christmas!
I hope everyone had a joyful holiday.
The girlies have been little angels since yesterday afternoon. We went to my uncle's house last night, where my kiddos were the only kids around and they were perfect--even while we were having an adults only gift exchange. We had let them open one gift beforehand, just to keep them occupied. The twins got Barbie MP3 players, which they LOVE (in addition to playing music, they look like dolls and have clothes and accessories that you can change out) and PS got a Flypen, which I'm not sure she's figured out yet.
Then my aunt gave them old school weaving looms, and they spent the entire evening and most of today making woven potholders. I find it rather amusing that with all of the fancy electronics they received, they have spent the most time on those weaving looms.
The girls seemed genuinely appreciative of the gifts they received from Santa this morning. I got DH a guitar and he got me a red Dooney & Burke purse. I'm not a label snob, but I will only carry leather purses, and I loved the look of this one. And we happened to stumble on it in Macy's when it was 30% off plus an extra 20% off--so a great deal. (Yeah--I told DH to get it and knew what I was getting ahead of time.)
So, per our usually protocol we spend Christmas day at home in our jammies. I had intended to make a decent dinner, but we were all so lazy that I just ended up making a giant pot of homemade mac 'n cheese--yum! But now I have to finish our packing and wrapping because tomorrow we leave for hometown, which will be 3 days of nonstop Chirstmas celebrations. We usually go to the movies on Christmas day, but with getting ready to leave town, it's just not happening this year.
And I am a teeny bit irritated w/ MIL (who I love--really!) because she just informed DH that she intends to take pictures of all of us in our nice holiday clothes when we get together tomorrow evening. Yeah--we have a 7 hour drive tomorrow and will be arriving only shortly before this get-together. And I generally travel with a ponytail, no make-up and my sweats. So I'm going to have to get up extra early to make myself beautiful in the morning--so I can spend the next 7 hours in the car--or I can try to squeeze in an hour-and-a-half's worth of showering, hair flattening, and kid readying into half an hour before all of DH's sibs show up at MIL's. And we can't leave any earlier in the morning because we have to drop off the critters for boarding.
Oh, and for anyone who's still reading, and wondering what happened with MIL's health issues, she had an appointment with her oncologist on Tuesday who said there was no indication of any cancer anywhere. We were all holding our breath waiting to hear this for the last 2 weeks. They aren't sure what IS causing her issues, but they have put her on a different medication and she is feeling much, much better.
The girlies have been little angels since yesterday afternoon. We went to my uncle's house last night, where my kiddos were the only kids around and they were perfect--even while we were having an adults only gift exchange. We had let them open one gift beforehand, just to keep them occupied. The twins got Barbie MP3 players, which they LOVE (in addition to playing music, they look like dolls and have clothes and accessories that you can change out) and PS got a Flypen, which I'm not sure she's figured out yet.
Then my aunt gave them old school weaving looms, and they spent the entire evening and most of today making woven potholders. I find it rather amusing that with all of the fancy electronics they received, they have spent the most time on those weaving looms.
The girls seemed genuinely appreciative of the gifts they received from Santa this morning. I got DH a guitar and he got me a red Dooney & Burke purse. I'm not a label snob, but I will only carry leather purses, and I loved the look of this one. And we happened to stumble on it in Macy's when it was 30% off plus an extra 20% off--so a great deal. (Yeah--I told DH to get it and knew what I was getting ahead of time.)
So, per our usually protocol we spend Christmas day at home in our jammies. I had intended to make a decent dinner, but we were all so lazy that I just ended up making a giant pot of homemade mac 'n cheese--yum! But now I have to finish our packing and wrapping because tomorrow we leave for hometown, which will be 3 days of nonstop Chirstmas celebrations. We usually go to the movies on Christmas day, but with getting ready to leave town, it's just not happening this year.
And I am a teeny bit irritated w/ MIL (who I love--really!) because she just informed DH that she intends to take pictures of all of us in our nice holiday clothes when we get together tomorrow evening. Yeah--we have a 7 hour drive tomorrow and will be arriving only shortly before this get-together. And I generally travel with a ponytail, no make-up and my sweats. So I'm going to have to get up extra early to make myself beautiful in the morning--so I can spend the next 7 hours in the car--or I can try to squeeze in an hour-and-a-half's worth of showering, hair flattening, and kid readying into half an hour before all of DH's sibs show up at MIL's. And we can't leave any earlier in the morning because we have to drop off the critters for boarding.
Oh, and for anyone who's still reading, and wondering what happened with MIL's health issues, she had an appointment with her oncologist on Tuesday who said there was no indication of any cancer anywhere. We were all holding our breath waiting to hear this for the last 2 weeks. They aren't sure what IS causing her issues, but they have put her on a different medication and she is feeling much, much better.
12/24/08
Toothpaste for Santa
We're waiting out the kiddos we can do the Santa thing. I am pooped and really just want to go to bed, but that's not gonna happen any time soon.
SS insisted on leaving toothpaste for Santa. Because in the letter he sent, he mentioned that he was packing his toothbrush, but didn't mention toothpaste. She also left him water to rinse with, along with his milk and cookies.
TT made sure the reindeer were hooked up with carrots and wrote a note asking Santa how he gets all the way around the whole world in one night. I guess I need to figure out an answer to that one.
SS insisted on leaving toothpaste for Santa. Because in the letter he sent, he mentioned that he was packing his toothbrush, but didn't mention toothpaste. She also left him water to rinse with, along with his milk and cookies.
TT made sure the reindeer were hooked up with carrots and wrote a note asking Santa how he gets all the way around the whole world in one night. I guess I need to figure out an answer to that one.
12/23/08
I am the meanest mom in the whole world.
I have been begging, pleading and screaming at my kids for the last two days to clean their rooms. They have been rotten little brats for the last two weeks who completely refuse to do what they are told. And they have a huge case of the gimmes. I refuse to raise bratty kids!
I have been so tempted to leave lumps of coal in their stockings this year. That would really make me the meanest mom in the world. But they aren't truly bad kids. They are kind to others, they do well in school, their teachers say they are angels . . . apparently the rottenness only comes out at home. But it makes me so mad to have spent a ton of money buying them all the stuff they really, really want just to have them act like ungrateful brats.
So tonight, when I got home at 9:00 and their rooms still weren't clean after DH had been yelling at them for the last two hours we decided to go extreme. I told them they had 5 minutes to finish their room or I was taking one of their Christmas presents back to the store.
And they didn't get it done, so I pulled out two Webkinz, showed them to the girls and said, "Well, you were getting this for Christmas. But now they're going back to the store and some other kids who take care of their toys can have them."
Then I reset the kitchen timer for 5 more minutes and told them that they would lose 2 more toys every 5 minutes until their room is done. (Well, DH though 5 minutes was not enough--so he made it 15 minutes.)
The thing is, I HATE doing this. I knew that SS really, really wanted this particular Webkinz that you can't find in any of the stores around here. It bums me out to take away something that I was really looking forward to giving them. I don't buy toys for the kids the rest of the year (except birthdays) so I go waaay overboard at Christmas because I love buying for them so much.
But they just are getting that if they don't take care of their things they aren't getting any new ones. Aargghhh!
Update: So the timer just went off again, and I asked what happened to the toy baskets that were in the floor. "We put them away." "Umm, where." "In the closet." So I go to their giant walk-in closet to find it piled 3 feet high with all of the crap they were supposed to be cleaning up!!!
I have been so tempted to leave lumps of coal in their stockings this year. That would really make me the meanest mom in the world. But they aren't truly bad kids. They are kind to others, they do well in school, their teachers say they are angels . . . apparently the rottenness only comes out at home. But it makes me so mad to have spent a ton of money buying them all the stuff they really, really want just to have them act like ungrateful brats.
So tonight, when I got home at 9:00 and their rooms still weren't clean after DH had been yelling at them for the last two hours we decided to go extreme. I told them they had 5 minutes to finish their room or I was taking one of their Christmas presents back to the store.
And they didn't get it done, so I pulled out two Webkinz, showed them to the girls and said, "Well, you were getting this for Christmas. But now they're going back to the store and some other kids who take care of their toys can have them."
Then I reset the kitchen timer for 5 more minutes and told them that they would lose 2 more toys every 5 minutes until their room is done. (Well, DH though 5 minutes was not enough--so he made it 15 minutes.)
The thing is, I HATE doing this. I knew that SS really, really wanted this particular Webkinz that you can't find in any of the stores around here. It bums me out to take away something that I was really looking forward to giving them. I don't buy toys for the kids the rest of the year (except birthdays) so I go waaay overboard at Christmas because I love buying for them so much.
But they just are getting that if they don't take care of their things they aren't getting any new ones. Aargghhh!
Update: So the timer just went off again, and I asked what happened to the toy baskets that were in the floor. "We put them away." "Umm, where." "In the closet." So I go to their giant walk-in closet to find it piled 3 feet high with all of the crap they were supposed to be cleaning up!!!
12/17/08
Facebook weirdness
So, being the uncool thirty-something that I am, I have only recently joined Facebook. (Thanks a lot PT--I totally blame you!)
Anyway, the first person to request me as a friend came out of the clear blue sky. It was a guy that I knew in high school but wasn't really friends with. We didn't have any classes together but we went to the same church. I think he may have kinda liked me, but I had zero interest in him. And, oh yeah, his dad and my mom dated for a while.
Since I didn't have a huge connection with this guy, it seemed strange that he would seek me out as a friend on Facebook. But DH assured me that I probably just came up as a potential friend when he was looking at our high school and it was no big deal.
Anyway, tonight his dad emails me via facebook and wants me to pass along his info to my mom so that he can say "hi!." I have no idea if he knows that my mom is now on hubby #3. Or that I speak to my mom approximately twice a year.
So, who knew that facebook could be used to help your mom hook up with old boyfriends?
Anyway, the first person to request me as a friend came out of the clear blue sky. It was a guy that I knew in high school but wasn't really friends with. We didn't have any classes together but we went to the same church. I think he may have kinda liked me, but I had zero interest in him. And, oh yeah, his dad and my mom dated for a while.
Since I didn't have a huge connection with this guy, it seemed strange that he would seek me out as a friend on Facebook. But DH assured me that I probably just came up as a potential friend when he was looking at our high school and it was no big deal.
Anyway, tonight his dad emails me via facebook and wants me to pass along his info to my mom so that he can say "hi!." I have no idea if he knows that my mom is now on hubby #3. Or that I speak to my mom approximately twice a year.
So, who knew that facebook could be used to help your mom hook up with old boyfriends?
12/16/08
OMG I feel like I am taking a Contracts exam!
The legal issue that I am working on feels straight out of 1L Contracts. (Have I mentioned that Contracts was my worst class. There is a reason that I am a products liability lawyer, and its because I rocked torts--and my procedure classes, which are very handy for a litigator. The UCC--eh, not so much.)
I'm back to what constitutes an offer and an acceptance. And this fact scenario feels like something specifically drafted to make law students ferret out all the issues. The problem is that I am supposed to be drafting an opinion letter to the client. And clients don't want to see all of the potential issues. They want an opinion on whether they are going to get their money or not. But I can't seem to form an opinion because all I can see are the issues.
If the Court sees A as an offer and acceptance, you win. Oh, but you did B two days later which changed the terms. So if the court sees that as a counter-offer, you lose-because there was no acceptance. But wait, they agreed to your counter-offer via email--so you win. But then you added more terms--so you lose. But they aren't material--so you win. Unless the court thinks they are material--then you lose.
Arghhhh!!!
I'm back to what constitutes an offer and an acceptance. And this fact scenario feels like something specifically drafted to make law students ferret out all the issues. The problem is that I am supposed to be drafting an opinion letter to the client. And clients don't want to see all of the potential issues. They want an opinion on whether they are going to get their money or not. But I can't seem to form an opinion because all I can see are the issues.
If the Court sees A as an offer and acceptance, you win. Oh, but you did B two days later which changed the terms. So if the court sees that as a counter-offer, you lose-because there was no acceptance. But wait, they agreed to your counter-offer via email--so you win. But then you added more terms--so you lose. But they aren't material--so you win. Unless the court thinks they are material--then you lose.
Arghhhh!!!
Snow day!
Or rather, ice day. There is not a bit of snow, but the highways are covered in ice so the kids' school canceled classes. (It really seems kind of ridiculous since we live about 4 blocks from school--I know that my brethren in the great white north would laugh if they saw how little it takes to start shutting down schools and government around here!) I am working from home--at least for now. I left the office at 8:30 last night only to hit the freeway and find traffic stopped in every direction and flashing lights all around. I sat still for more than half an hour without moving more than 100 yards. So I wasn't dying to get back into it today--although I feel a little guilty staying home because my firm isn't officially closed.
So I am doing some research on a breach of contract case and I see that one of the parties is named Renoir. That's interesting, I think. So I run a quick Google search and find out that the case does in fact involve THE Renoir. And I came across this article, which I found quite fascinating. (Long story short, loads of Renoir's personal artifacts ended up in College Station, Texas and were subsequently transported to an Elks Lodge in Maryland where they were auctioned off to some guy in Ohio.)
Does anyone else get distracted like this when doing research? Sometimes the cases that I am sifting through are so interesting, that I have to read them even when they are clearly not on point. Or I start googling to figure out who the parties are. It's a terrible time waster.
Now, must resume research. It will not look good if I bill only 3 hours because I am working from home.
So I am doing some research on a breach of contract case and I see that one of the parties is named Renoir. That's interesting, I think. So I run a quick Google search and find out that the case does in fact involve THE Renoir. And I came across this article, which I found quite fascinating. (Long story short, loads of Renoir's personal artifacts ended up in College Station, Texas and were subsequently transported to an Elks Lodge in Maryland where they were auctioned off to some guy in Ohio.)
Does anyone else get distracted like this when doing research? Sometimes the cases that I am sifting through are so interesting, that I have to read them even when they are clearly not on point. Or I start googling to figure out who the parties are. It's a terrible time waster.
Now, must resume research. It will not look good if I bill only 3 hours because I am working from home.
12/14/08
My dog is totally whipped.
Literally. By my gay cat.
We eventually had to take the bone away from the cat so that Bob could have it.
We eventually had to take the bone away from the cat so that Bob could have it.
12/12/08
The best part of Christmas
Tonight we went shopping for our "angels." DH and I started adopting angels from the Angel Tree when we were in college. It was so much fun to shop for a less fortunate child--especially when we had no children to shop for. Now we let each of our girls pick one child off of the angel tree every year. My goal is to teach my children to joy of giving to others and to break out of the "gimme, gimme" phase that is so pervasive this time of year.
This year we had an 11 year old girl, a 3 year old girl and a 6 year old boy. The younger girl asked only for clothes and the older asked only for a coat. But of course, we couldn't just by clothes--all kids need fun stuff at Christmas.
SS was so funny shopping for clothes for her little girl. She kept going from rack to rack "how about this one Mommy? . . . oh Mommy look at this! . . . oh, we have to get her this! . . . and don't forget the shoes--it says her shoe size . . . and she needs socks, too, don't you think?" She talked me into way more stuff than I was intending to buy.
PS was shopping for the older girl--so we looked for some girlie things for her. PS found a Caboodle (remember when those were all the rage?) and insisted we fill it full of nail polishes, lip glosses and hair do-dads. She was SO excited to come home and organize everything so that it fit just right.
I (a-hem) slightly exceeded my budget, but it's all good. We are a lot better off than many right now. And all I needed for Christmas was to see my kids so excited about giving to others.
This year we had an 11 year old girl, a 3 year old girl and a 6 year old boy. The younger girl asked only for clothes and the older asked only for a coat. But of course, we couldn't just by clothes--all kids need fun stuff at Christmas.
SS was so funny shopping for clothes for her little girl. She kept going from rack to rack "how about this one Mommy? . . . oh Mommy look at this! . . . oh, we have to get her this! . . . and don't forget the shoes--it says her shoe size . . . and she needs socks, too, don't you think?" She talked me into way more stuff than I was intending to buy.
PS was shopping for the older girl--so we looked for some girlie things for her. PS found a Caboodle (remember when those were all the rage?) and insisted we fill it full of nail polishes, lip glosses and hair do-dads. She was SO excited to come home and organize everything so that it fit just right.
I (a-hem) slightly exceeded my budget, but it's all good. We are a lot better off than many right now. And all I needed for Christmas was to see my kids so excited about giving to others.
Good news for me!
We got our bonuses this morning--that was enough to make my day a good one. But the office manager also came in my office and told me that I got one of the best bonuses--especially for someone with my level of experience. She said that my supervising attorneys were very complimentary of me and that Partner is the one who suggested my bonus. Yea me!
I took off early today because my nanny needed the day off, so I picked up the girlies and we did a little shopping. I swear the twins have worn holes in every pair of jeans they own. It was nice to have a little extra time with the girls.
Tomorrow we go to the Christmas Tree Farm to pick out our tree. I have been feeling so Grinchy. Hopefully bringing a little Christmas into the house will help. But today has been a good day-and I am much happier than yesterday when I was drowning my troubles in vodka and Lofthouse cookies.
I took off early today because my nanny needed the day off, so I picked up the girlies and we did a little shopping. I swear the twins have worn holes in every pair of jeans they own. It was nice to have a little extra time with the girls.
Tomorrow we go to the Christmas Tree Farm to pick out our tree. I have been feeling so Grinchy. Hopefully bringing a little Christmas into the house will help. But today has been a good day-and I am much happier than yesterday when I was drowning my troubles in vodka and Lofthouse cookies.
12/11/08
I could kill him
My brother, that is. A few weeks ago he got into major trouble. Think of all the really bad things that could happen to you at the same time--financial problems, criminal charges, family issues. Much of it was his own fault--or at least his willful blindness. Some of it was not.
I did as much as I could on the legal end. I also called my dad and my grandparents--who my brother had completely cut out of his life for the last two years. I convinced them that my brother was in dire straits--that he needed help. They reached out to him and bailed him out.
Now my brother has disappeared. He won't return phone calls (I think he phone has been turned off) or emails. He hasn't shown up when he promised to. He basically took everything he could from all of us and then just went back to the way things were.
I feel like I have been conned. There are few people in the world who could pull one over on me. I am inherently distrustful and can almost always see through bullshit. But I sure feel like my brother conned me--and it pisses me off.
But even more than that, I feel like my brother took advantage of my grandparents. We don't have the best parents in the world, but my grandparents have always been there when we needed them. My grandparents have always been comfortable and in a position to help out financially when we really needed it. But I think they have lived longer than they planned for and have really cut back on their spending in the last few years. I know that they do not have the extra income to bail out my brother like they could have a few years ago.
And yet they did, and now he is being a total asshole. If I weren't 400 miles away, I would totally kick his ass--even if he is 8" taller and 100 pounds heavier than me.
I did as much as I could on the legal end. I also called my dad and my grandparents--who my brother had completely cut out of his life for the last two years. I convinced them that my brother was in dire straits--that he needed help. They reached out to him and bailed him out.
Now my brother has disappeared. He won't return phone calls (I think he phone has been turned off) or emails. He hasn't shown up when he promised to. He basically took everything he could from all of us and then just went back to the way things were.
I feel like I have been conned. There are few people in the world who could pull one over on me. I am inherently distrustful and can almost always see through bullshit. But I sure feel like my brother conned me--and it pisses me off.
But even more than that, I feel like my brother took advantage of my grandparents. We don't have the best parents in the world, but my grandparents have always been there when we needed them. My grandparents have always been comfortable and in a position to help out financially when we really needed it. But I think they have lived longer than they planned for and have really cut back on their spending in the last few years. I know that they do not have the extra income to bail out my brother like they could have a few years ago.
And yet they did, and now he is being a total asshole. If I weren't 400 miles away, I would totally kick his ass--even if he is 8" taller and 100 pounds heavier than me.
12/9/08
The not so fun part of being a lawyer
So, it turns out that I did not get my paralegal in trouble. He got in trouble for taking 3.5 hours to do a task that should have taken 30 minutes.
I have known for a while that my supervisors are not especially fond of Paralegal. But 75% of his assignments come directly from me, so I have been doing my best to advise him on how to do better and to protect him from my higher-ups. But now I am under heavy-pressure to make him live up to expectations and he just isn't cutting it. I don't especially like the managerial task that I have been given, but I don't really have a choice. I feel like I am being tested to see whether I have what it takes to be a manager.
So today I went and basically gave Paralegal very short deadlines to complete projects that have been languishing. He just isn't getting tasks done quickly enough-even though I have told him to cut all of his deadlines in half. If he doesn't meet these newly-imposed deadlines, there is going to be a big problem. I have had to yank projects away from him in the past, and it looks like it may happen again. But this time Big Boss is watching closely and it won't bode well for Paralegal.
Ugh . . . they definitely did not teach this in law school.
I have known for a while that my supervisors are not especially fond of Paralegal. But 75% of his assignments come directly from me, so I have been doing my best to advise him on how to do better and to protect him from my higher-ups. But now I am under heavy-pressure to make him live up to expectations and he just isn't cutting it. I don't especially like the managerial task that I have been given, but I don't really have a choice. I feel like I am being tested to see whether I have what it takes to be a manager.
So today I went and basically gave Paralegal very short deadlines to complete projects that have been languishing. He just isn't getting tasks done quickly enough-even though I have told him to cut all of his deadlines in half. If he doesn't meet these newly-imposed deadlines, there is going to be a big problem. I have had to yank projects away from him in the past, and it looks like it may happen again. But this time Big Boss is watching closely and it won't bode well for Paralegal.
Ugh . . . they definitely did not teach this in law school.
12/7/08
Walking the tightrope
I think one of the biggest challenges for new lawyers is learning to balance. And I'm not talking about work vs. life. I mean things like taking initiative versus appearing presumptuous and completing one supervisor's tasks before another's.
The first is the biggest challenge for me. Every day there is at least one task that I question whether I should go forward with or seek approval for. Generally, if I have a question, I seek approval. But when I have done something repeatedly and know that it will be required again, then I will just do it. Usually this is ok--but this week I got my paralegal in trouble for doing I task that I assigned (creating a med chron). We have done med chrons for all similar cases, so when the records came in, I handed them off and told him to do the chron. Apparently Partner, for some reason I have yet to ascertain, did not want a med chron on this case. (I did tell Paralegal that if he is ever called out because of a task I assigned to please make clear that I gave him that assignment and that I will take the heat.) Another new lawyer on the other end of the office was scolded the same day for giving her paralegal a task.
Sometimes the line is just hard to see. Big Boss is constantly telling me "the staff works for you." So as I have been getting busier and busier I have been handing more tasks off to my secretary and paralegal. I also try to anticipate what needs to be done, because we are so busy, so that we are not bombarded at the last minute. But apparently anticipation can backfire.
The balance of assignments from different supervisors not something that I usually struggle with anymore, but I know other associates in my office are having problems with this. The best advice I can give if you have this issue is to ask for deadlines on every assignment. Partner was terrible about giving me deadlines, which made it difficult to prioritize my tasks--you have to know what is due and when to keep things running smoothly. Also, be sure that the attorneys you are working with know if you are being piled on by another attorney. Many are oblivious to anything except their own cases.
This issue definitely gets easier. Now I have a set of cases that I am primarily responsible for--so I am well acquainted with what is due when, and it is much easier to prioritize. This week, however, I had to deal with two supervisors who seemed to be at odds about when a task needed to be done.
On Monday Big Boss asked me to send some documents out to a third party by the end of the week. I assured them that I would get the documents out without a problem--but the documents needed to be approved by Partner before they were sent (Big Boss was out of town until Friday). On Tuesday I approached Partner about the documents. Partner informed me in no uncertain terms that he was unable to view the documents the entire week.
At that moment, I knew I was screwed. Big Boss wanted the documents out--but wanted final approval from someone higher than me. And I had scheduled a conference call with the party receiving the documents for Tuesday--so they definitely needed to be fed exed by Friday so that he would have time to review them before the call.
On Thursday morning I again (knowing it would piss Partner off) approached Partner about the docs and reminded him of the conference call next week. Partner (who was definitely pissed off) again informed me that he did not have time to look at the documents.
Yep, definitely screwed. I knew that Big Boss would not be happy when he arrived on Friday and the documents had not been sent. But I couldn't exactly force Partner to do anything. All I could do is have the documents in final perfect form and ask Big Boss to approve them so that they could be sent on Friday.
On Friday I held my breath while waiting for Big Boss. To say he was pissed is an understatement--it was not pretty. But I let him have his say and then said calmly, "What do you want me to do about it? The documents are ready, I can overnight them today, but they haven't been approved." He said, "You're approving them, and they're going out."
OK then--I could have had them out on Tuesday if I had had the authority to approve them.
I have to say that I feel sort of betrayed by Partner. He knew that Big Boss would be angry and he knew that I would be the one to take the heat. I guess Partner doesn't owe me anything, but I would never let my paralegal or secretary take the hit for something that I had control over. And I even tried to spin it to Big Boss to put Partner in the best possible light (he was really busy, he had this and this and this going on . . .)
Fortunately, I don't think Big Boss's anger was really directed toward me (and even apologised later). He knows that I get my assignments done on time (usually well ahead of schedule) and that I am not a procrastinator. But he also said that there were going to be some changes that I am not entirely happy about. I'm not too excited to go to work tomorrow to see what the fallout from all of this is.
The first is the biggest challenge for me. Every day there is at least one task that I question whether I should go forward with or seek approval for. Generally, if I have a question, I seek approval. But when I have done something repeatedly and know that it will be required again, then I will just do it. Usually this is ok--but this week I got my paralegal in trouble for doing I task that I assigned (creating a med chron). We have done med chrons for all similar cases, so when the records came in, I handed them off and told him to do the chron. Apparently Partner, for some reason I have yet to ascertain, did not want a med chron on this case. (I did tell Paralegal that if he is ever called out because of a task I assigned to please make clear that I gave him that assignment and that I will take the heat.) Another new lawyer on the other end of the office was scolded the same day for giving her paralegal a task.
Sometimes the line is just hard to see. Big Boss is constantly telling me "the staff works for you." So as I have been getting busier and busier I have been handing more tasks off to my secretary and paralegal. I also try to anticipate what needs to be done, because we are so busy, so that we are not bombarded at the last minute. But apparently anticipation can backfire.
The balance of assignments from different supervisors not something that I usually struggle with anymore, but I know other associates in my office are having problems with this. The best advice I can give if you have this issue is to ask for deadlines on every assignment. Partner was terrible about giving me deadlines, which made it difficult to prioritize my tasks--you have to know what is due and when to keep things running smoothly. Also, be sure that the attorneys you are working with know if you are being piled on by another attorney. Many are oblivious to anything except their own cases.
This issue definitely gets easier. Now I have a set of cases that I am primarily responsible for--so I am well acquainted with what is due when, and it is much easier to prioritize. This week, however, I had to deal with two supervisors who seemed to be at odds about when a task needed to be done.
On Monday Big Boss asked me to send some documents out to a third party by the end of the week. I assured them that I would get the documents out without a problem--but the documents needed to be approved by Partner before they were sent (Big Boss was out of town until Friday). On Tuesday I approached Partner about the documents. Partner informed me in no uncertain terms that he was unable to view the documents the entire week.
At that moment, I knew I was screwed. Big Boss wanted the documents out--but wanted final approval from someone higher than me. And I had scheduled a conference call with the party receiving the documents for Tuesday--so they definitely needed to be fed exed by Friday so that he would have time to review them before the call.
On Thursday morning I again (knowing it would piss Partner off) approached Partner about the docs and reminded him of the conference call next week. Partner (who was definitely pissed off) again informed me that he did not have time to look at the documents.
Yep, definitely screwed. I knew that Big Boss would not be happy when he arrived on Friday and the documents had not been sent. But I couldn't exactly force Partner to do anything. All I could do is have the documents in final perfect form and ask Big Boss to approve them so that they could be sent on Friday.
On Friday I held my breath while waiting for Big Boss. To say he was pissed is an understatement--it was not pretty. But I let him have his say and then said calmly, "What do you want me to do about it? The documents are ready, I can overnight them today, but they haven't been approved." He said, "You're approving them, and they're going out."
OK then--I could have had them out on Tuesday if I had had the authority to approve them.
I have to say that I feel sort of betrayed by Partner. He knew that Big Boss would be angry and he knew that I would be the one to take the heat. I guess Partner doesn't owe me anything, but I would never let my paralegal or secretary take the hit for something that I had control over. And I even tried to spin it to Big Boss to put Partner in the best possible light (he was really busy, he had this and this and this going on . . .)
Fortunately, I don't think Big Boss's anger was really directed toward me (and even apologised later). He knows that I get my assignments done on time (usually well ahead of schedule) and that I am not a procrastinator. But he also said that there were going to be some changes that I am not entirely happy about. I'm not too excited to go to work tomorrow to see what the fallout from all of this is.
12/2/08
Sucky stuff all around us
MIL has been having lots of trouble with her kidneys lately. They put in a stint about a month ago, but it got blocked so they took it out again. She has continued to be in a great deal of pain, so they went in yesterday to replace the stint and found some kind of blockage in her bladder.
MIL was diagnosed with colon cancer about 5 years ago. She had a very large section of her colon removed (any more would have required a colostomy bag) and underwent chemo and radiation. She fought off the cancer, but it returned two years later. I think they only did radiation the second time.
So the docs are speculating that this "blockage" could be scar tissue from the radiation. Or something else. They ordered an MRI, but weren't able to complete it. So we are all just left wondering what is going to happen next. And it is not an easy wait given all the she has been through in the last few years.
Than today DH called to tell me that they had just laid off the guy who works directly under him and several other people in his company today. Scary. We've felt pretty insulated from the current economic situation until today. This hit a little close to home. But DH feels pretty secure because he is (now) the only web guy in the entire company. And it is a large company that must have someone in-house to keep things running. DH thinks that his job is secure--but of course he feels terrible for his friend that was just laid off with no notice.
And the kicker is that this company is having its big, awesome holiday party this weekend. If it is anything like last year, the cost of this party could cover at least two annual salaries. There was an open bar (for like 700 people), tons of food, 2 bands (a 9 piece and a smaller jazz band) and goodies galore. It just seems wrong to have a party like that when you are laying people off (although DH pointed out that it may have all been booked before these decisions were made). But they were kind allow the laid-off workers to still attend the party--better add a few more bottles to that alcohol order.
MIL was diagnosed with colon cancer about 5 years ago. She had a very large section of her colon removed (any more would have required a colostomy bag) and underwent chemo and radiation. She fought off the cancer, but it returned two years later. I think they only did radiation the second time.
So the docs are speculating that this "blockage" could be scar tissue from the radiation. Or something else. They ordered an MRI, but weren't able to complete it. So we are all just left wondering what is going to happen next. And it is not an easy wait given all the she has been through in the last few years.
Than today DH called to tell me that they had just laid off the guy who works directly under him and several other people in his company today. Scary. We've felt pretty insulated from the current economic situation until today. This hit a little close to home. But DH feels pretty secure because he is (now) the only web guy in the entire company. And it is a large company that must have someone in-house to keep things running. DH thinks that his job is secure--but of course he feels terrible for his friend that was just laid off with no notice.
And the kicker is that this company is having its big, awesome holiday party this weekend. If it is anything like last year, the cost of this party could cover at least two annual salaries. There was an open bar (for like 700 people), tons of food, 2 bands (a 9 piece and a smaller jazz band) and goodies galore. It just seems wrong to have a party like that when you are laying people off (although DH pointed out that it may have all been booked before these decisions were made). But they were kind allow the laid-off workers to still attend the party--better add a few more bottles to that alcohol order.
11/30/08
I love the stuff my kids write
We were just going through the kids' school folders and found what must have been TT's Thanksgiving essay:
I am thankful for K.V. because she is my best friend in the whole world. And Mrs. B. is the best teacher in the world. And P.M. is also my best friend in the world to. And my twin sister S.S. My favorite sister P.S. is to. And of course [L.C.] and [Mr. L.C.], my mom and dad who I love and my cats and dog. And Mrs. P [1st grade teacher] and Mrs. P2 [K teacher]. And all my other friends to. And my living fish to. And my cousins and parents and uncles and aunts. And Stephaney and Bella [guinea pigs] befor she passed away. Like some of my fish did. Stephaney did not pass away yet.
Does Amazon Still Suck?
My Amazon Sucks post, written about this time last year, is probably my most frequently hit post of all time. It seems a lot of people think Amazon sucks. I have pretty much boycotted Amazon since last year because they pissed me off--but I found a few good deals there this year and decided to give them another shot. In fact, I have placed quite a few orders with Amazon over the last few days.
On Thursday I ordered a GPS to replace the one that was stolen a couple of months ago. This particular model was $99 in many stores' Black Friday ads. I decided to order from Amazon rather than battle the crowds on Friday. This turned out to be a great move--I got free shipping, saved approximately $8 in taxes and my GPS was on my doorstep yesterday!! So, I'm thinking maybe Amazon doesn't really suck so much.
Also on Thursday, I placed two separate orders for Barbie MP3 players for $15 each with free a free accessory. The same MP3 players are in this weeks' Target ad, but they are the 512 meg players and I got 1 gig players--so a good deal, especially with the free accessory. (I had to do separate orders because I couldn't add two free accessories in the same order.) I picked up a CD that DH wants, The Tales of Beedle the Bard for PS, and another toy for my niece, split between the two orders so that they would be over $25 and I could get free shipping. All of those items have already shipped or are scheduled to ship on Monday (except Beedle, which isn't released until Dec. 4.) So, unless my orders don't actually show up next week, I am still pretty happy.
On Friday, I placed an order for 2 Nintendo DS's. Both scheduled to ship on Monday. Again, I'm happy.
But Amazon hasn't lost all of their suckiness. On Friday I placed an order of about $150 for assorted video games, all of which I got pretty good deals on. One has shipped. The rest are not scheduled to ship until AFTER CHRISTMAS!! WTF are they doing still advertising this stuff as available--with absolutely no notice that they will not ship until after Christmas until the final checkout screen. It is infuriating to think that I am ticking 5 items off of my Christmas list, only to find that I will not have them until after Christmas. HEY AMAZON, IF YOU DON'T HAVE THE ITEM IN STOCK, DON'T ADVERTISE IT AS BEING IN STOCK AND WASTE MY TIME!
Anyway, I went ahead and placed the order. None of it was must-have stuff. We'll see if it ships earlier than estimated. If it gets close to Christmas and it hasn't shipped, I'll cancel my order.
Also, on Thursday, I placed an order from Target for the Fly Pentop Computer that was advertised for $29. Target's online store is powered through Amazon. Despite the fact that this particular item was in Target's Black Friday ad, and that I have ordered it a full month before Christmas, my order confirmation states that it will not ship until December 26. WTF? Again, WHY ARE YOU SELLING SHIT AND ADVERTISING IT AS IN STOCK WHEN IT WILL NOT SHIP UNTIL AFTER CHRISTMAS? OBVIOUSLY IT IS NOT ACTUALLY IN STOCK OR IT COULD SHIP SOMETIME IN THE NEXT F'ING MONTH.
So, does Amazon still suck? We'll it is a mixed bag. You may or may not get what you want when you want it. The true test will be whether I get the stuff I ordered before my estimated shipping date. But it is quite frustrating not to know whether I am going to be getting my order or not. Honestly, it reeks of dishonesty. Amazon suckers you in with good prices, gets you to load up your cart with other stuff, and then informs you that you aren't going to get the items that you originally wanted until after the holidays. Until Amazon starts stating up front, on the initial item description page that their products won't ship for a full month, then, yes, Amazon still sucks.
On Thursday I ordered a GPS to replace the one that was stolen a couple of months ago. This particular model was $99 in many stores' Black Friday ads. I decided to order from Amazon rather than battle the crowds on Friday. This turned out to be a great move--I got free shipping, saved approximately $8 in taxes and my GPS was on my doorstep yesterday!! So, I'm thinking maybe Amazon doesn't really suck so much.
Also on Thursday, I placed two separate orders for Barbie MP3 players for $15 each with free a free accessory. The same MP3 players are in this weeks' Target ad, but they are the 512 meg players and I got 1 gig players--so a good deal, especially with the free accessory. (I had to do separate orders because I couldn't add two free accessories in the same order.) I picked up a CD that DH wants, The Tales of Beedle the Bard for PS, and another toy for my niece, split between the two orders so that they would be over $25 and I could get free shipping. All of those items have already shipped or are scheduled to ship on Monday (except Beedle, which isn't released until Dec. 4.) So, unless my orders don't actually show up next week, I am still pretty happy.
On Friday, I placed an order for 2 Nintendo DS's. Both scheduled to ship on Monday. Again, I'm happy.
But Amazon hasn't lost all of their suckiness. On Friday I placed an order of about $150 for assorted video games, all of which I got pretty good deals on. One has shipped. The rest are not scheduled to ship until AFTER CHRISTMAS!! WTF are they doing still advertising this stuff as available--with absolutely no notice that they will not ship until after Christmas until the final checkout screen. It is infuriating to think that I am ticking 5 items off of my Christmas list, only to find that I will not have them until after Christmas. HEY AMAZON, IF YOU DON'T HAVE THE ITEM IN STOCK, DON'T ADVERTISE IT AS BEING IN STOCK AND WASTE MY TIME!
Anyway, I went ahead and placed the order. None of it was must-have stuff. We'll see if it ships earlier than estimated. If it gets close to Christmas and it hasn't shipped, I'll cancel my order.
Also, on Thursday, I placed an order from Target for the Fly Pentop Computer that was advertised for $29. Target's online store is powered through Amazon. Despite the fact that this particular item was in Target's Black Friday ad, and that I have ordered it a full month before Christmas, my order confirmation states that it will not ship until December 26. WTF? Again, WHY ARE YOU SELLING SHIT AND ADVERTISING IT AS IN STOCK WHEN IT WILL NOT SHIP UNTIL AFTER CHRISTMAS? OBVIOUSLY IT IS NOT ACTUALLY IN STOCK OR IT COULD SHIP SOMETIME IN THE NEXT F'ING MONTH.
So, does Amazon still suck? We'll it is a mixed bag. You may or may not get what you want when you want it. The true test will be whether I get the stuff I ordered before my estimated shipping date. But it is quite frustrating not to know whether I am going to be getting my order or not. Honestly, it reeks of dishonesty. Amazon suckers you in with good prices, gets you to load up your cart with other stuff, and then informs you that you aren't going to get the items that you originally wanted until after the holidays. Until Amazon starts stating up front, on the initial item description page that their products won't ship for a full month, then, yes, Amazon still sucks.
Our Lady of Grace Continues her Reign
So, I recovered from my little incident on Friday, but managed a repeat performance (minus the excruciating injury) this morning.
DH and I were leisurely reading the ads in the Sunday paper when he came across the Roboquad in the Target ad for $35. PS has been going on and on about the Roboquad for over a year now. She asked for it on her 9th birthday--and I explained that there was no way in Hades that I was paying $100 for a toy that she would lose interest in within 15 minutes and which would be gathering dust in the corner of her room for the rest of eternity.
I learned early on that my children have little sustained interest in battery-operated toys. They may be initially drawn in by the lights and sounds, but after a day or two those toys are always left buried in the bottom of their toy bins. Legos, K-nex, little dolls (not baby dolls) and figures are the things that actually get played with. And PS rarely even plays with those--she is more a books/puzzles/crafts kind of girl.
Anyway, despite my unwillingness to drop $100 on the Roboquad, I was willing to spend $35 on the darn thing. Mainly because PS has not shut up about it since she first asked for it. (In fact, just yesterday I told DH I might by the $12 mini-Roboquad just see if it would pacify her.) So, as soon as I saw it in the ad this morning, I threw on clothes and ran out the door, knowing that there would only be a couple available. I ran into Target and managed to grab the last one remaining on the shelf!
On the way home, I stopped by Starbucks and had a lovely chat with our Starbucks guy (you know, the one who knows what you always order) who was surprised to see me without kids in tow.
And as I was sliding back into the Behemoth I managed to drop DH's mocha right in the seat--spilling everywhere. I yelled, "Shit!" and then "Fuck!" as I noticed that my ass was also now covered in mocha--yes, in the brand new, extra-comfy yoga pants that I had just bought yesterday.
Of course, there happened to be an entire tour bus from Mexico unloading right next to me right about the time I was patting down my ass trying to soak up all the coffee. (This Starbucks is in a truck stop--but it is the least busy one in town.) I got a few odd looks, but I shrugged them off. Fortunately, my seats are leather and the console is full of napkins, so I managed to get most of the mess cleaned up.
I finally managed to get back into the Behemoth and start pulling off when I noticed a car that was parked right next to me the whole time. There was a lady sitting in the passenger seat (like 18 inches away from where all this happened), just shaking her head at me. She looked like one of those pentecostal women with the really long hair and no make-up. (Look at me all judgmental, with my long hair pulled into a ratty ponytail, hiding under a baseball cap, and no make-up.) I'm sure that she was praying for my mortal soul after the expletives that I had spewed earlier.
I finally managed to make it home without further incident and with 1 1/2 mochas.
DH and I were leisurely reading the ads in the Sunday paper when he came across the Roboquad in the Target ad for $35. PS has been going on and on about the Roboquad for over a year now. She asked for it on her 9th birthday--and I explained that there was no way in Hades that I was paying $100 for a toy that she would lose interest in within 15 minutes and which would be gathering dust in the corner of her room for the rest of eternity.
I learned early on that my children have little sustained interest in battery-operated toys. They may be initially drawn in by the lights and sounds, but after a day or two those toys are always left buried in the bottom of their toy bins. Legos, K-nex, little dolls (not baby dolls) and figures are the things that actually get played with. And PS rarely even plays with those--she is more a books/puzzles/crafts kind of girl.
Anyway, despite my unwillingness to drop $100 on the Roboquad, I was willing to spend $35 on the darn thing. Mainly because PS has not shut up about it since she first asked for it. (In fact, just yesterday I told DH I might by the $12 mini-Roboquad just see if it would pacify her.) So, as soon as I saw it in the ad this morning, I threw on clothes and ran out the door, knowing that there would only be a couple available. I ran into Target and managed to grab the last one remaining on the shelf!
On the way home, I stopped by Starbucks and had a lovely chat with our Starbucks guy (you know, the one who knows what you always order) who was surprised to see me without kids in tow.
And as I was sliding back into the Behemoth I managed to drop DH's mocha right in the seat--spilling everywhere. I yelled, "Shit!" and then "Fuck!" as I noticed that my ass was also now covered in mocha--yes, in the brand new, extra-comfy yoga pants that I had just bought yesterday.
Of course, there happened to be an entire tour bus from Mexico unloading right next to me right about the time I was patting down my ass trying to soak up all the coffee. (This Starbucks is in a truck stop--but it is the least busy one in town.) I got a few odd looks, but I shrugged them off. Fortunately, my seats are leather and the console is full of napkins, so I managed to get most of the mess cleaned up.
I finally managed to get back into the Behemoth and start pulling off when I noticed a car that was parked right next to me the whole time. There was a lady sitting in the passenger seat (like 18 inches away from where all this happened), just shaking her head at me. She looked like one of those pentecostal women with the really long hair and no make-up. (Look at me all judgmental, with my long hair pulled into a ratty ponytail, hiding under a baseball cap, and no make-up.) I'm sure that she was praying for my mortal soul after the expletives that I had spewed earlier.
I finally managed to make it home without further incident and with 1 1/2 mochas.
11/28/08
SS's Christmas List
7-year old SS just presented me with the following list, intended to supplement the list that she already sent to Santa:
Laptop (With name on it.)
Toy Guitar
Toy Drums
Diary
Transformers
Star Wars Toys
Star Wars Legos
Frog Posters
Robot servent
My own little hut made out of kertons that are pink around my bed
Webkinz Snowman
Webkinz Squirrl
Webkinz (Red) bird
Webkinz Raindeer
de Blob (Wii game)
I love it--but I'm not so sure that the laptop or robot servant are going to happen.
Laptop (With name on it.)
Toy Guitar
Toy Drums
Diary
Transformers
Star Wars Toys
Star Wars Legos
Frog Posters
Robot servent
My own little hut made out of kertons that are pink around my bed
Webkinz Snowman
Webkinz Squirrl
Webkinz (Red) bird
Webkinz Raindeer
de Blob (Wii game)
I love it--but I'm not so sure that the laptop or robot servant are going to happen.
I'm so smooth
I spent most of Thanksgiving allowing DH and the Kiddos to wait on me, while supervising DH's preparation of our feast from the sofa. He did a pretty good job for a first-timer (except for his refusal to salt and pepper the mashed potatoes, which led to a rather ridiculous fight.) I was feeling pretty well--especially considering that the day before I felt like I'd had the crap beaten out of me.
This morning I was feeling even better. DH and I even got out for a bit and did some shopping, and held up pretty well. Came home, took a nap and woke up with the munchies. Grabbed a muffin and an icy cold glass a milk and settled into the sofa to catch the Mork & Mindy marathon.
And then I dropped the entire glass of icy cold milk right in my lap. I screamed and jumped up. Bob took off, thinking he was in trouble, and DH came running into the room wondering what in the heck I had done. Meanwhile I am frantically trying to rip off my jeans, which are now glued to my body with icy cold milk.
Somewhere, in the midst of instinctively leaping from the couch after I dumped milk all over myself, I managed to injure myself. All of the improvement that I made over the last two days has disappeared, and I am in the most pain I have been in since the moment I woke up from surgery, right before they pumped me full of morphine.
I'm a little concerned that I pulled some of my stitches, but I have no way of knowing because they are internal. My incisions are super-glued on the outside--so nothing to pop there.
After sitting on the couch for a couple of hours following this little incident, I started to feel better. We had promised to take the rugrats to see Bolt this weekend, and I thought I could manage sitting in the theater. Mistake.
Actually, the sitting was ok. I stuffed TT's coat behind my back and managed to get comfy. But walking into and out of the theater was absolute torture. As in, a white hot knife twisting where my gallbladder used to be.
So DH says I am now grounded to the sofa for the rest of the weekend. Yea me.
Yes, I am a complete and total dork.
This morning I was feeling even better. DH and I even got out for a bit and did some shopping, and held up pretty well. Came home, took a nap and woke up with the munchies. Grabbed a muffin and an icy cold glass a milk and settled into the sofa to catch the Mork & Mindy marathon.
And then I dropped the entire glass of icy cold milk right in my lap. I screamed and jumped up. Bob took off, thinking he was in trouble, and DH came running into the room wondering what in the heck I had done. Meanwhile I am frantically trying to rip off my jeans, which are now glued to my body with icy cold milk.
Somewhere, in the midst of instinctively leaping from the couch after I dumped milk all over myself, I managed to injure myself. All of the improvement that I made over the last two days has disappeared, and I am in the most pain I have been in since the moment I woke up from surgery, right before they pumped me full of morphine.
I'm a little concerned that I pulled some of my stitches, but I have no way of knowing because they are internal. My incisions are super-glued on the outside--so nothing to pop there.
After sitting on the couch for a couple of hours following this little incident, I started to feel better. We had promised to take the rugrats to see Bolt this weekend, and I thought I could manage sitting in the theater. Mistake.
Actually, the sitting was ok. I stuffed TT's coat behind my back and managed to get comfy. But walking into and out of the theater was absolute torture. As in, a white hot knife twisting where my gallbladder used to be.
So DH says I am now grounded to the sofa for the rest of the weekend. Yea me.
Yes, I am a complete and total dork.
11/25/08
So, I survived
The gallbladder surgery went much better than I anticipated. I had a tough time with the anesthesia after my ablation a couple of months ago, and I expected to feel like crap most of the day. But they pumped me full of zofran and phenergan (and morphine), and I only had a few minutes of nausea.
There was quite a bit of pain immediately afterward. The surgery was done laproscopically and apparently they inject CO2 to inflate your abdomen so they can see what they are doing. But all the gas doesn't come back out, and what remains is painful. When I first awakened, it felt like there were bricks on my chest and I couldn't take a deep breath--much like it felt when I had broken ribs. Eventually the pain shifted and the drugs kicked in. Now there is some pain in my side and shoulders, but otherwise I am feeling pretty good. Just very, very tired.
I am looking forward to having the next five days off, with a good excuse to just lie around the house doing nothing.
There was quite a bit of pain immediately afterward. The surgery was done laproscopically and apparently they inject CO2 to inflate your abdomen so they can see what they are doing. But all the gas doesn't come back out, and what remains is painful. When I first awakened, it felt like there were bricks on my chest and I couldn't take a deep breath--much like it felt when I had broken ribs. Eventually the pain shifted and the drugs kicked in. Now there is some pain in my side and shoulders, but otherwise I am feeling pretty good. Just very, very tired.
I am looking forward to having the next five days off, with a good excuse to just lie around the house doing nothing.
11/24/08
Spending my last hours bonding with my gallbladder
Today has been predictably crazy. It was my only day at work this week. The next 6 days will be the most consecutive days I have had off of work since I started there a year ago. (And I haven't told them yet that I have booked a 7 night trip to Disney World this summer!)
So this morning I had to go to the hospital for bloodwork. At least that's what they told me when I spent half an hour on the phone with them last week doing all the pre-admit crap for my gallbladder surgery tomorrow. They also told me I would be in and out quickly--especially if I went in early. So I left my house at 7:15 this morning to be at the hospital by 7:30. Where I waited for half a freakin' hour before I saw anybody. Then I had to go over a ton of the preadmit crap that I had already spent an half an hour going over last week. I was peeved about making the effort to get there early just to be stuck waiting and was not particularly nice to the preadmit girl (ok, I was a total bitch.) But I had a report that I had worked on over the weekend and really wanted to have waiting on Big Boss's desk when he arrived--and they were making me late to work and enduring that wasn't gonna happen.
Of course, now I'm afraid that my bitchy karma is going to come back to haunt me and they are going to forget to give me pain meds or something tomorrow.
I ran my ass off the rest of the day, trying to make a couple of deadlines and get all of my loose ends wrapped up before I was out the rest of the week. I swear to god, if my secretary asks one more time, "does this have to go out today?" I am going to scream. Yes, it f'ing has to go out today or I wouldn't have told you that. I'm sorry that you have a lot to do. I have a lot to do, too and I don't have time to do both of our jobs.
I was afraid that I would be working late tonight--a problem because DH had plans and PS had gymnastics at 7:00. I called my nanny to see if she could take PS if I didn't make it on time. She said, "well, I don't know. I don't know if I can find it--I'm just not sure about that." WTF? Part of the reason that I pay for a nanny so that I have someone who can take the kids to all of their activities. I even pay her a gas allowance for this. She gets the gas allowance every week--even though she hasn't had to take the kids anywhere in almost a month.
Somehow, I managed to get all my crap together and out of the office by 5:30--in just enough time to run home, grab the girls, drop PS off at gymnastics and run get some dinner while bribing the twins with ice cream cones. Back to the gymnastics place, watch the end of PS's practice, then stop to grab her a burger, and home by 8:30--just in time for bed. Yelled repeatedly for the girls to brush their teeth, lay out clothes for tomorrow and hop in bed (no time for baths tonight--but at least it's getting cooler and they didn't have much time to run around and get stinky outdoors today.)
9:00--haven't heard a peep from DH. I am somewhat irritated with him for making his plans for tonight when I warned him that it was going to be a crazy day for me. I definitely do not mind him going out--today was just a really bad day and he was unreasonably resistant to changing his plans. I'm feeling not very high on his priority list lately.
So this morning I had to go to the hospital for bloodwork. At least that's what they told me when I spent half an hour on the phone with them last week doing all the pre-admit crap for my gallbladder surgery tomorrow. They also told me I would be in and out quickly--especially if I went in early. So I left my house at 7:15 this morning to be at the hospital by 7:30. Where I waited for half a freakin' hour before I saw anybody. Then I had to go over a ton of the preadmit crap that I had already spent an half an hour going over last week. I was peeved about making the effort to get there early just to be stuck waiting and was not particularly nice to the preadmit girl (ok, I was a total bitch.) But I had a report that I had worked on over the weekend and really wanted to have waiting on Big Boss's desk when he arrived--and they were making me late to work and enduring that wasn't gonna happen.
Of course, now I'm afraid that my bitchy karma is going to come back to haunt me and they are going to forget to give me pain meds or something tomorrow.
I ran my ass off the rest of the day, trying to make a couple of deadlines and get all of my loose ends wrapped up before I was out the rest of the week. I swear to god, if my secretary asks one more time, "does this have to go out today?" I am going to scream. Yes, it f'ing has to go out today or I wouldn't have told you that. I'm sorry that you have a lot to do. I have a lot to do, too and I don't have time to do both of our jobs.
I was afraid that I would be working late tonight--a problem because DH had plans and PS had gymnastics at 7:00. I called my nanny to see if she could take PS if I didn't make it on time. She said, "well, I don't know. I don't know if I can find it--I'm just not sure about that." WTF? Part of the reason that I pay for a nanny so that I have someone who can take the kids to all of their activities. I even pay her a gas allowance for this. She gets the gas allowance every week--even though she hasn't had to take the kids anywhere in almost a month.
Somehow, I managed to get all my crap together and out of the office by 5:30--in just enough time to run home, grab the girls, drop PS off at gymnastics and run get some dinner while bribing the twins with ice cream cones. Back to the gymnastics place, watch the end of PS's practice, then stop to grab her a burger, and home by 8:30--just in time for bed. Yelled repeatedly for the girls to brush their teeth, lay out clothes for tomorrow and hop in bed (no time for baths tonight--but at least it's getting cooler and they didn't have much time to run around and get stinky outdoors today.)
9:00--haven't heard a peep from DH. I am somewhat irritated with him for making his plans for tonight when I warned him that it was going to be a crazy day for me. I definitely do not mind him going out--today was just a really bad day and he was unreasonably resistant to changing his plans. I'm feeling not very high on his priority list lately.
11/18/08
Helluva Day*
Or, a day in the life of a law mom...
Up at 4:15 this morning to leave the house a 5:15 to meet Big Boss at 6:00 to drive to the 9:30 prove-up hearing on the settlement agreement that has been a major pain in my ass for the last month in a town out in the sticks** 3 hours away.
Yeah, I was a tiny bit nervous about spending 6 hours in a car with Big Boss--but it really wasn't bad. He is very good at carrying a conversation, and imparted plenty of wisdom and lawyer gossip along the way. And on the way back he had conference calls most of the time. (At one point he had his phone in one hand, while checking his Blackberry with the other and driving with his knee.)
I expected to be the invisible sidekick once we arrived at the courthouse, but Big Boss surprised me by telling everyone that I had been doing all the work to pull this thing together and make it run smoothly.
This was my first time in federal court, and I was thrown off a little bit--forgetting that you use a podium in federal court. (Not that I was the one speaking--I'm not admitted in federal court. But Big Boss told me that I need to work on getting admitted into two of our local federal district courts!) Every prove-up I have ever attended has been at the bench. And even for lengthier hearings in state court, counsel remains seated at counsel tables. There is definitely more formality in federal court.
And I think I saved the day at the end of the hearing by pointing out that an important document hadn't been given to the judge.
I made it back to the office by 2:00 where I ran my tail off making sure I make a couple of deadlines and finalizing the details of another prove-up tomorrow. I left at 5:15, and headed to meet DH and the girls.
Although all 3 girls are in the same school, PS and the twins had events at different schools tonight. So DH left early to take PS to her event and I met him and grabbed the twins to take them to their event. Of course I arrived 5 minutes before it started and the cafetorium was packed and standing room only. And, of course, since I had a hearing this morning I am in a suit and 3 1/2 inch heels.
Finally made it home at 8:00, and threw the twins in the bath. Somehow, both of the cats also managed to make it into the bath. DH and PS arrived home a few minutes later, and I watched the video of her first orchestra concert, which was not nearly as terrible as I anticipated.
And, while everything else in my crazy day is going on I am dealing with a very close relative who has gotten into some deep shit. And the types of law that my relatives usually need help with are generally outside the scope of my expertise. But I am doing what I can to help out on the legal front and to be as supportive as possible.
Now I am going to collapse into bed and try to get a decent night's sleep before another marathon day tomorrow.
*I just noticed this is my 500th post. Am I supposed to do something special to celebrate 500th post day?
**Don't let the "sticks" part fool ya. This court is well known as a hotbed of high-end litigation of a particular genre--and the other courtroom was packed with more than a few well known lawyers.
Up at 4:15 this morning to leave the house a 5:15 to meet Big Boss at 6:00 to drive to the 9:30 prove-up hearing on the settlement agreement that has been a major pain in my ass for the last month in a town out in the sticks** 3 hours away.
Yeah, I was a tiny bit nervous about spending 6 hours in a car with Big Boss--but it really wasn't bad. He is very good at carrying a conversation, and imparted plenty of wisdom and lawyer gossip along the way. And on the way back he had conference calls most of the time. (At one point he had his phone in one hand, while checking his Blackberry with the other and driving with his knee.)
I expected to be the invisible sidekick once we arrived at the courthouse, but Big Boss surprised me by telling everyone that I had been doing all the work to pull this thing together and make it run smoothly.
This was my first time in federal court, and I was thrown off a little bit--forgetting that you use a podium in federal court. (Not that I was the one speaking--I'm not admitted in federal court. But Big Boss told me that I need to work on getting admitted into two of our local federal district courts!) Every prove-up I have ever attended has been at the bench. And even for lengthier hearings in state court, counsel remains seated at counsel tables. There is definitely more formality in federal court.
And I think I saved the day at the end of the hearing by pointing out that an important document hadn't been given to the judge.
I made it back to the office by 2:00 where I ran my tail off making sure I make a couple of deadlines and finalizing the details of another prove-up tomorrow. I left at 5:15, and headed to meet DH and the girls.
Although all 3 girls are in the same school, PS and the twins had events at different schools tonight. So DH left early to take PS to her event and I met him and grabbed the twins to take them to their event. Of course I arrived 5 minutes before it started and the cafetorium was packed and standing room only. And, of course, since I had a hearing this morning I am in a suit and 3 1/2 inch heels.
Finally made it home at 8:00, and threw the twins in the bath. Somehow, both of the cats also managed to make it into the bath. DH and PS arrived home a few minutes later, and I watched the video of her first orchestra concert, which was not nearly as terrible as I anticipated.
And, while everything else in my crazy day is going on I am dealing with a very close relative who has gotten into some deep shit. And the types of law that my relatives usually need help with are generally outside the scope of my expertise. But I am doing what I can to help out on the legal front and to be as supportive as possible.
Now I am going to collapse into bed and try to get a decent night's sleep before another marathon day tomorrow.
*I just noticed this is my 500th post. Am I supposed to do something special to celebrate 500th post day?
**Don't let the "sticks" part fool ya. This court is well known as a hotbed of high-end litigation of a particular genre--and the other courtroom was packed with more than a few well known lawyers.
11/15/08
Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Clause
Last week the twins wrote letters to Santa while they were home with the nanny and promptly put them in the mailbox. (Yeah, I thought they were jumping the gun a little bit--thank you Wal-mart toybook.) Anyway, DH and I never saw the letters. We meant to pull them from the mailbox after the girls went to bed, but forgot. The next day, however, the letters were gone.
Today both girls received letters from Santa addressed to them. I have no idea where they come from. I guess the postman must must have a hookup with the big guy.
SS is so excited she has read her letter about five times and keeps dancing around the room with it. I just hope she doesn't think Santa is really going to bring the $225 Hannah Montana electric scooter that was on her list--'cause it ain't gonna happen.
Today both girls received letters from Santa addressed to them. I have no idea where they come from. I guess the postman must must have a hookup with the big guy.
SS is so excited she has read her letter about five times and keeps dancing around the room with it. I just hope she doesn't think Santa is really going to bring the $225 Hannah Montana electric scooter that was on her list--'cause it ain't gonna happen.
Thanksgiving
We're trying to figure out what to do for Thanksgiving. We live about 400 miles away from our families--but usually some of them come here and I cook. I love to cook Thanksgiving dinner. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday--it is all about yummy food and relaxing. No worrying about buying gifts for people who already have too much crap anyway. (I love giving when I know it is something the recipient will really love--but I hate the pressure of coming up with some token gift just because it is a holiday.) And I don't get dragged to church.
But this year I have scheduled my gallbladder surgery two days before Thanksgiving (yes, so I won't miss work). Therefore, we won't be traveling and we haven't invited anyone here because I doubt that I will be up to preparing a big meal.
My preference would be to simply eat out--but it looks like most regular restaurants will be closed. Only fancy restaurants and hotels are offering Thanksgiving brunches or dinners. And my little suburb has no such places.
Another option is to order in dinner. But it would be rather expensive just for us (and a ton of food)--and I know that it wouldn't taste nearly as good as what I could prepare.
So, I'm thinking DH is going to be stuck cooking under my direction. We will keep it simple--perhaps preparing only a breast instead of a whole turkey, and cutting back on the sides. And no yummy homemade rolls. (I had to marry into the family to get MIL's roll recipe and they are the best!)
PS has suggested that we just have Turkey Pot Pie. She says, "you've got the turkey, you've got the pie, what else do you need?" Maybe she's right.
But this year I have scheduled my gallbladder surgery two days before Thanksgiving (yes, so I won't miss work). Therefore, we won't be traveling and we haven't invited anyone here because I doubt that I will be up to preparing a big meal.
My preference would be to simply eat out--but it looks like most regular restaurants will be closed. Only fancy restaurants and hotels are offering Thanksgiving brunches or dinners. And my little suburb has no such places.
Another option is to order in dinner. But it would be rather expensive just for us (and a ton of food)--and I know that it wouldn't taste nearly as good as what I could prepare.
So, I'm thinking DH is going to be stuck cooking under my direction. We will keep it simple--perhaps preparing only a breast instead of a whole turkey, and cutting back on the sides. And no yummy homemade rolls. (I had to marry into the family to get MIL's roll recipe and they are the best!)
PS has suggested that we just have Turkey Pot Pie. She says, "you've got the turkey, you've got the pie, what else do you need?" Maybe she's right.
Work
I am beginning to feel overwhelmed. I have been super-busy the last month or so. In fact, I was the top biller in my firm last month (we get statements each month of the most & least hours billed and the average--do all firms do this?) And I'm on track for a repeat performance. The thing is--I have no desire to be the top biller. One of the attractions of a smaller firm is more reasonable working hours. And up until recently I feel like my hours have been pretty reasonable and that I was doing pretty well maintaining the work/life balance. Not so much over the last two weeks--I have been working late and going in early--seriously cutting into my time with the girlies.
Part of the problem is that everyone in my office is extremely busy--and we are working on hiring more attorneys. But there was a huge response due on a very big case last month--I wasn't involved at all and I still outbilled the two guys working on it.
The other part of the problem is that Big Boss, who typically does a lot of traveling, has been in the office a lot lately and he has been piling the work on. And I keep taking it, because Big Boss allows me to work on bigger projects and gives me more responsibility than Partner.
I'm not sure Big Boss is aware of how much he as given me--he has no idea what I am doing for Partner (fortunately, Partner realizes that Big Boss is throwing a lot my way and has not been piling it on as well). And I have more stuff taking me out of the office--which means that I have less time to get stuff done in the office. It killed me to spend 4 hours in the car on both Wednesday and Thursday this week. Even though I can bill for my travel time, I can't get anything else done--so it felt like wasted time.
Next week I have two out-of-town prove-ups. Big Boss informed me that these are the only two that I will be accompanied on--and then I will be on my own. I think this is his way of telling me I will be traveling more. He also informed me that I will be getting a blackberry. Yeah, I know I am probably the only lawyer on the planet without one--but I was ok with that because I'm not so sure that I want to be available to my firm 24/7. (Actually, I have a Blackjack for my personal phone, but I wasn't about to put my work email on it.)
DH says I need to set some boundaries. And even Partner has warned that Big Boss will take over my life if I let him. But I still feel like I am proving myself--and I am just now getting do the things I have been wanting to--so I'm not quite ready to pull the reins yet.
Part of the problem is that everyone in my office is extremely busy--and we are working on hiring more attorneys. But there was a huge response due on a very big case last month--I wasn't involved at all and I still outbilled the two guys working on it.
The other part of the problem is that Big Boss, who typically does a lot of traveling, has been in the office a lot lately and he has been piling the work on. And I keep taking it, because Big Boss allows me to work on bigger projects and gives me more responsibility than Partner.
I'm not sure Big Boss is aware of how much he as given me--he has no idea what I am doing for Partner (fortunately, Partner realizes that Big Boss is throwing a lot my way and has not been piling it on as well). And I have more stuff taking me out of the office--which means that I have less time to get stuff done in the office. It killed me to spend 4 hours in the car on both Wednesday and Thursday this week. Even though I can bill for my travel time, I can't get anything else done--so it felt like wasted time.
Next week I have two out-of-town prove-ups. Big Boss informed me that these are the only two that I will be accompanied on--and then I will be on my own. I think this is his way of telling me I will be traveling more. He also informed me that I will be getting a blackberry. Yeah, I know I am probably the only lawyer on the planet without one--but I was ok with that because I'm not so sure that I want to be available to my firm 24/7. (Actually, I have a Blackjack for my personal phone, but I wasn't about to put my work email on it.)
DH says I need to set some boundaries. And even Partner has warned that Big Boss will take over my life if I let him. But I still feel like I am proving myself--and I am just now getting do the things I have been wanting to--so I'm not quite ready to pull the reins yet.
11/8/08
Socializing
This week I met my first MILP. I've never met anyone that I knew through the internet before. Probably because I am inherently non-trusting--but a fellow MILP seemed pretty safe. (No, I'm not telling you who it is, because her blog says where she was, and that would reveal the location of my super-secret bat cave. But if you read both blogs it doesn't take a genius to figure it out.)
I'm usually very quiet and shy when I first meet new people, but I'm afraid I might have talked her ear off. I guess 'cause its not really like meeting a "new" person. I already know what is going on in her life--so it was more like just catching up with an old friend.
And there were no freaky surprises--like horns, or finding out that she was not, in fact, a MILP but an 43-year old overweight balding man posing like a MILP just to pick up hot young lawyers.
She was exactly like you would expect from reading her blog.
We had dinner and drinks and chatted forever. I had a great time visiting with another law mom. Now I think we need to have MILP convention, where we abandon our children our studies and our jobs and party like rock-stars for a weekend.
I'm usually very quiet and shy when I first meet new people, but I'm afraid I might have talked her ear off. I guess 'cause its not really like meeting a "new" person. I already know what is going on in her life--so it was more like just catching up with an old friend.
And there were no freaky surprises--like horns, or finding out that she was not, in fact, a MILP but an 43-year old overweight balding man posing like a MILP just to pick up hot young lawyers.
She was exactly like you would expect from reading her blog.
We had dinner and drinks and chatted forever. I had a great time visiting with another law mom. Now I think we need to have MILP convention, where we abandon our children our studies and our jobs and party like rock-stars for a weekend.
I May Have Been Given Just Enough Rope to Hang Myself
So remember that list I posted earlier in the week about what I wanted to do in the next year? Well, I may be ticking things off more quickly than I anticipated.
On Wednesday, Partner told me that I was taking a corporate rep depo. On Thursday, Partner told me that he wanted to "shift responsibility" for three cases to me. This was after I informed him that we hadn't done something that we needed to do very soon. He seemed irritated, but I don't know if it was at himself or at me. But I couldn't have taken care of this particular task because I never saw the document that it related to--it went straight from Partner's desk to the file. Secretary is not allowed to give me documents without Partner's instruction.
I guess I am going to have to pin down Partner this week and tell him that while I am happy to take on more responsibility, he must allow Secretary to give me everything that comes in on these cases. I'm not going to be the scapegoat if a deadline is missed. Fortunately, I caught the other issue before it was too late.
So Friday, I spent most of the day doing the corp. rep. depo, and next week I am going to prep employees for the depositions that I will be doing later in the week. The following week I am accompanying Big Boss to two prove-ups for the Settlement Agreements I have spent the last month drafting and coordinating (BTW, Big Law A-hole has been less of a PITA lately. Maybe he reads my blog--ha!) And I am working on scheduling 3 more depos.
My inbox is overflowing and I can barely find the top of my desk, and all of these out-of the-office appointments are slowing me down further. My work load has picked up substantially in the last 2 months. But I guess it can't be a bad thing for my hours to shoot up right before bonuses are decided.
On Wednesday, Partner told me that I was taking a corporate rep depo. On Thursday, Partner told me that he wanted to "shift responsibility" for three cases to me. This was after I informed him that we hadn't done something that we needed to do very soon. He seemed irritated, but I don't know if it was at himself or at me. But I couldn't have taken care of this particular task because I never saw the document that it related to--it went straight from Partner's desk to the file. Secretary is not allowed to give me documents without Partner's instruction.
I guess I am going to have to pin down Partner this week and tell him that while I am happy to take on more responsibility, he must allow Secretary to give me everything that comes in on these cases. I'm not going to be the scapegoat if a deadline is missed. Fortunately, I caught the other issue before it was too late.
So Friday, I spent most of the day doing the corp. rep. depo, and next week I am going to prep employees for the depositions that I will be doing later in the week. The following week I am accompanying Big Boss to two prove-ups for the Settlement Agreements I have spent the last month drafting and coordinating (BTW, Big Law A-hole has been less of a PITA lately. Maybe he reads my blog--ha!) And I am working on scheduling 3 more depos.
My inbox is overflowing and I can barely find the top of my desk, and all of these out-of the-office appointments are slowing me down further. My work load has picked up substantially in the last 2 months. But I guess it can't be a bad thing for my hours to shoot up right before bonuses are decided.
11/4/08
More than just a little barfy
This is a very good account about living through a pregnancy with hyperemesis gravadarum. I suffered through HG for three pregnancies (my oldest, my twins, and a miscarriage in between). I discussed it briefly here and here-- but those posts are pretty long and it is a lot to filter through.
In short (or maybe not), HG is morning sickness to the 10th degree. With my oldest and the pregnancy, I spent about 6 weeks carrying around an IV pole at home to receive fluids. I vomited constantly (I kept a 32 oz. plastic cup by my bed and would fill it completely every couple of hours.) I didn't even try to eat, it was all bile. And I had the cup, because when you vomit that much and go that long without food, you simply don't have the energy to walk the 10 feet to the bathroom to barf in the toilet.
It was 1000 times worse with the twins. I was in the hospital for most of my first 20 weeks. My docs brought in a psychiatrist because they thought it was psychosomatic (even though I had been through this twice before, and this was very much a planned pregnancy). Then they told me to consider termination, because I was in the very real danger of starving to death. The put a feeding tube down my nose, which I barfed back up. Then they put a line into a major artery, right at my collarbone, to deliver more substantial nutrients than the IV in my arm was capable of. Finally, an awesome gastroenterologist discovered an experimental treatment involving massive doses of steroids. It took a couple of tries, and there were no studies indicating what the impact of the drugs might be on my unborn children, but it finally worked.
Unfortunately, although the HG finally cleared up my twins developed TTTS. My research after the twins were born leads me to believe that it was caused, or at least contributed to, by the HG. TTTS is a condition that only happens to identical twins, where shared blood vessels in the placenta shunt the majority of the nutrients to one twin. There is only a 30% survival rate for both twins, and 30% of twins who survive suffer brain damage.
Of course, my girls survived in perfect condition, but it was an extremely long and difficult pregnancy and underscores the potential consequences of HG.
In short (or maybe not), HG is morning sickness to the 10th degree. With my oldest and the pregnancy, I spent about 6 weeks carrying around an IV pole at home to receive fluids. I vomited constantly (I kept a 32 oz. plastic cup by my bed and would fill it completely every couple of hours.) I didn't even try to eat, it was all bile. And I had the cup, because when you vomit that much and go that long without food, you simply don't have the energy to walk the 10 feet to the bathroom to barf in the toilet.
It was 1000 times worse with the twins. I was in the hospital for most of my first 20 weeks. My docs brought in a psychiatrist because they thought it was psychosomatic (even though I had been through this twice before, and this was very much a planned pregnancy). Then they told me to consider termination, because I was in the very real danger of starving to death. The put a feeding tube down my nose, which I barfed back up. Then they put a line into a major artery, right at my collarbone, to deliver more substantial nutrients than the IV in my arm was capable of. Finally, an awesome gastroenterologist discovered an experimental treatment involving massive doses of steroids. It took a couple of tries, and there were no studies indicating what the impact of the drugs might be on my unborn children, but it finally worked.
Unfortunately, although the HG finally cleared up my twins developed TTTS. My research after the twins were born leads me to believe that it was caused, or at least contributed to, by the HG. TTTS is a condition that only happens to identical twins, where shared blood vessels in the placenta shunt the majority of the nutrients to one twin. There is only a 30% survival rate for both twins, and 30% of twins who survive suffer brain damage.
Of course, my girls survived in perfect condition, but it was an extremely long and difficult pregnancy and underscores the potential consequences of HG.
11/2/08
One Year
Today marks the one year anniversary of being a licensed attorney. So I guess tomorrow, I am officially a second-year. A lot has changed in the last year. This time last year, I was wondering if I would ever find a job and if I had just spent a hundred grand on the biggest mistake of my life. Or if I would be stuck doing a job that I hated because it was the only one that I could find.
But I did find a job--and one that I like. It wasn't my first choice. I really, really wanted to be a prosecutor and applied with every DA's office within a hundred-mile radius. But it just didn't happen. I felt a tiny pang of jealousy toward a group of baby-prosecutors at a CLE last week. They have what I wanted. And now my career-path is set. They don't exactly take laterals in the DA's office.
But mostly, I am ok with the way things worked out. My desire to work in the DA's office was to gain trial experience quickly. I'm not sure that I would have wanted to be a career prosecutor. And I definitely would not have wanted to switch to criminal defense.
I like what I do now. I like the kind of law I am practicing and the quality of cases that I get to work on. (Mostly products defense.) And while I do not have the trial experience that I would have preferred to have one year in, I have had increasing responsibility this year.
One year ago I did:
But I did find a job--and one that I like. It wasn't my first choice. I really, really wanted to be a prosecutor and applied with every DA's office within a hundred-mile radius. But it just didn't happen. I felt a tiny pang of jealousy toward a group of baby-prosecutors at a CLE last week. They have what I wanted. And now my career-path is set. They don't exactly take laterals in the DA's office.
But mostly, I am ok with the way things worked out. My desire to work in the DA's office was to gain trial experience quickly. I'm not sure that I would have wanted to be a career prosecutor. And I definitely would not have wanted to switch to criminal defense.
I like what I do now. I like the kind of law I am practicing and the quality of cases that I get to work on. (Mostly products defense.) And while I do not have the trial experience that I would have preferred to have one year in, I have had increasing responsibility this year.
One year ago I did:
- mostly research projects
- some motion drafting
- lots of depo summaries
- lots of document review
- no secretary or paralegal--and not much need for either
- and I was completely invisible to anybody outside the firm
- lots of reports to clients (not my favorite)
- less research
- some motion drafting
- lots of discovery drafting and responses
- drafting settlement agreements
- fewer depo summaries--general summaries are given to a paralegal, I do summaries when we are looking for something specific
- less document review--again, much of this is now given to my paralegal
- I have a secretary and a paralegal and have significantly increased my use of them over the last few months. Partners give me big projects and it is my job to direct the staff to ensure they are done properly and on time
- Communicating with other counsel to negotiate minor points & scheduling
- Attending minor hearings solo
- Meeting with clients occasionally
- Taking depositions on minor cases--and no experts yet
- Interviewing and communicating with experts
- Argue in court
- Take more depos--more important depos
- See my name on a pleading/motion
- More interaction with clients
- More authority to manage my cases
- My own cases (there are a few that are mostly mine, but I still run everything by Partner. This is also a double-edged sword. Any cases that I get will be minor cases--and I love working on the huge cases--even if it's just in the background. So I don't want to be buried in small cases to the exclusion of the big cases. Right now I have both. )
- Being pigeonholed--one attorney in my firm does only one type of case. Two others work only on one very big case. That would suck! I have a broad variety cases, and I like it that way.
10/31/08
What the hell were their parents thinking?
Per our annual protocol, I am staying home to hand out candy while DH and the rugrats canvas the neighborhood.
Two little girls just came to my door dressed like slutty pirates. They couldn't have been more than 12. In spaghetti straps, micro-miniskirts, fishnet stockings, bright red lipstick, and more eyeliner than I could use in a year.
Oh, and there was no adult in sight. Ugh! It makes me sick thinking about what could happen if these girls come across the wrong house.
For the record, my twins are out there dressed as Darth Vader and a Clone Trooper--not an ounce of skin showing! PS is Pocahontas--not her first choice, but I had to make her a Pocahontas costume for a school project last week, and dammit, it was gonna be worn again. Besides, I bought her a pair of fake Uggs to go with it, and that pretty much appeased her.
Two little girls just came to my door dressed like slutty pirates. They couldn't have been more than 12. In spaghetti straps, micro-miniskirts, fishnet stockings, bright red lipstick, and more eyeliner than I could use in a year.
Oh, and there was no adult in sight. Ugh! It makes me sick thinking about what could happen if these girls come across the wrong house.
For the record, my twins are out there dressed as Darth Vader and a Clone Trooper--not an ounce of skin showing! PS is Pocahontas--not her first choice, but I had to make her a Pocahontas costume for a school project last week, and dammit, it was gonna be worn again. Besides, I bought her a pair of fake Uggs to go with it, and that pretty much appeased her.
10/29/08
Mom stuff
Left work early today for a teacher conference. TT is doing awesome, which I already knew. Ran home grabbed the kids, went back to the school for another meeting. PS's class gets to go to camp for 3 days in the spring, so there was in information meeting for parents. I clearly remember doing the same thing when I was in the 5th grade--and having a blast.
I got home to find a message from PS's G/T teacher. PS said she thought she was calling parents for phone conferences.
Not quite. G/T teacher informs me that they reviewed TT's test scores and have decided to admit her into the G/T program. Both twins were tested at the end of last year on the recommendation of their teachers, but were not admitted. This mystified me, because both of their teachers told me that they were certain that they would make the cut. I had a lengthy meeting with the G/T teacher (who I think is a fruitcake anyway), but little came of it.
But our school system introduced a new standardized test that they took into consideration. And TT's new teacher has really been pushing for her admission into the G/T program.
So now one of my identical twins has been admitted, but not the other. How the hell am I supposed to handle this? To make it worse, two of my 3 children have been admitted. I am afraid SS is going to think she is the "dumb kid."
Her test scores are generally lower than her sister's, but only by a few points. On the most recent standardized test, TT was in the 92 percentile and SS was in the 89th. And truly, I don't think that TT is smarter than SS--they just exhibit their intelligence differently.
Stupid fruitcake teacher says to me, "Well, you know each child is an individual." Are you freaking kidding me? I am the mother of identical twins who most people can't tell apart--yet to me their personalities couldn't be more different. I know better than anybody how individual my children are.
Does being a parent ever get easy?
I got home to find a message from PS's G/T teacher. PS said she thought she was calling parents for phone conferences.
Not quite. G/T teacher informs me that they reviewed TT's test scores and have decided to admit her into the G/T program. Both twins were tested at the end of last year on the recommendation of their teachers, but were not admitted. This mystified me, because both of their teachers told me that they were certain that they would make the cut. I had a lengthy meeting with the G/T teacher (who I think is a fruitcake anyway), but little came of it.
But our school system introduced a new standardized test that they took into consideration. And TT's new teacher has really been pushing for her admission into the G/T program.
So now one of my identical twins has been admitted, but not the other. How the hell am I supposed to handle this? To make it worse, two of my 3 children have been admitted. I am afraid SS is going to think she is the "dumb kid."
Her test scores are generally lower than her sister's, but only by a few points. On the most recent standardized test, TT was in the 92 percentile and SS was in the 89th. And truly, I don't think that TT is smarter than SS--they just exhibit their intelligence differently.
Stupid fruitcake teacher says to me, "Well, you know each child is an individual." Are you freaking kidding me? I am the mother of identical twins who most people can't tell apart--yet to me their personalities couldn't be more different. I know better than anybody how individual my children are.
Does being a parent ever get easy?
10/28/08
F.U. Part 2
The little fucker did it again. They finally sent back redlined settlement documents (changing shit they had already agreed to), but didn't copy all parties. So I forwarded their revisions to the rest of the parties along with the corrections I made to the Addendum.
He wrote back (again copying everybody) "We're fine with all of the corrections--as long as you corrected the misspelling in the footer and the misuse of he/she in paragraph 2."
Ok, did you not read the fucking document I just sent? I made the damn corrections. But thanks for pointing it out--AGAIN.
It took a great deal of professional composure not to dash off a snotty response.
The good news is that Big Boss did not say a word to me. Probably because all hell is breaking loose in one of our massive cases. I am completely buried right now--I have never been so busy or been so behind.
But because everyone else is also crazy busy, I am also getting to be more visible. Usually I am hidden in the background being bcc'd on everything. I've also had to take on a much more managerial role with my secretary and paralegal. Big Boss has been pushing me to be bossier all along--and at this point I just can't get it all done by myself. They are grumbling and probably like me less than they did a couple of weeks ago. But I just remind them to be glad they have to deal with me and not Big Boss.
He wrote back (again copying everybody) "We're fine with all of the corrections--as long as you corrected the misspelling in the footer and the misuse of he/she in paragraph 2."
Ok, did you not read the fucking document I just sent? I made the damn corrections. But thanks for pointing it out--AGAIN.
It took a great deal of professional composure not to dash off a snotty response.
The good news is that Big Boss did not say a word to me. Probably because all hell is breaking loose in one of our massive cases. I am completely buried right now--I have never been so busy or been so behind.
But because everyone else is also crazy busy, I am also getting to be more visible. Usually I am hidden in the background being bcc'd on everything. I've also had to take on a much more managerial role with my secretary and paralegal. Big Boss has been pushing me to be bossier all along--and at this point I just can't get it all done by myself. They are grumbling and probably like me less than they did a couple of weeks ago. But I just remind them to be glad they have to deal with me and not Big Boss.
10/26/08
F.U.
I have spent the better part of the last month preparing settlement documents in a big case for a substantial settlement. This was my first time to ever prepare settlement documents, and I was pretty much left to wing it.
But I pulled it off. There are 5 parties involved in this settlement, and we had everybody in agreement by the 5th revision--and most of the changes were pretty minor. So I was feeling pretty good about getting it right on my first go 'round. In total, the settlement documents exceed 60 pages. I did 95% of the drafting--incorporating changes by the other parties as requested.
Then, an ad litem was appointed at the last minute who wanted to make several changes, including adding an addendum. So I spent half a day incorporating all of his changes, and again, submitted the agreement to all parties for final approval. Big Boss told me to ask the other parties to please make any changes they wanted and circulate them among the parties. (They have, so far, been submitting revisions to us and I have been making all changes.)
Within a couple of hours, one of the parties approved the new changes. But I just got an email (cc'd to about 10 people) from another party saying, "We're still reviewing the settlement documents, but you spelled 'Addendum' wrong in the footer of that document, and in paragraph 13 of [65 paragraph document] [one party out of about 17] is referred to as a he rather than a she."
Thank you very much Big Law a-hole. Because you couldn't have included those two mistakes that were admittedly mine in the list of the other changes that needed to be made (although seriously, in a footer with an 8 point font can you even tell the difference between an "n" and an "m"?) God knows I fixed some of your mistakes without advertising it to the world. Or are you just PO'd that we asked you to make your own changes this time?
I am sure to be bitched out on Monday about this. Big Boss will not be happy that I sent out a document with a spelling error.
Sigh--what a way to ruin a perfectly good Sunday afternoon.
P.S. Yes, I get the irony. If you spend any time at all on my blog you will find it riddled with typos. I spend minimal time proofing here. But I swear, I combed those documents. All 60 pages, line by line with a ruler. Guess I missed the footer. And the red squiggly line that Word should have put under my misspelling.
But I pulled it off. There are 5 parties involved in this settlement, and we had everybody in agreement by the 5th revision--and most of the changes were pretty minor. So I was feeling pretty good about getting it right on my first go 'round. In total, the settlement documents exceed 60 pages. I did 95% of the drafting--incorporating changes by the other parties as requested.
Then, an ad litem was appointed at the last minute who wanted to make several changes, including adding an addendum. So I spent half a day incorporating all of his changes, and again, submitted the agreement to all parties for final approval. Big Boss told me to ask the other parties to please make any changes they wanted and circulate them among the parties. (They have, so far, been submitting revisions to us and I have been making all changes.)
Within a couple of hours, one of the parties approved the new changes. But I just got an email (cc'd to about 10 people) from another party saying, "We're still reviewing the settlement documents, but you spelled 'Addendum' wrong in the footer of that document, and in paragraph 13 of [65 paragraph document] [one party out of about 17] is referred to as a he rather than a she."
Thank you very much Big Law a-hole. Because you couldn't have included those two mistakes that were admittedly mine in the list of the other changes that needed to be made (although seriously, in a footer with an 8 point font can you even tell the difference between an "n" and an "m"?) God knows I fixed some of your mistakes without advertising it to the world. Or are you just PO'd that we asked you to make your own changes this time?
I am sure to be bitched out on Monday about this. Big Boss will not be happy that I sent out a document with a spelling error.
Sigh--what a way to ruin a perfectly good Sunday afternoon.
P.S. Yes, I get the irony. If you spend any time at all on my blog you will find it riddled with typos. I spend minimal time proofing here. But I swear, I combed those documents. All 60 pages, line by line with a ruler. Guess I missed the footer. And the red squiggly line that Word should have put under my misspelling.
10/18/08
Date night --woohoo!
DH and I rarely ever go out without the kids. Because we work long hours and don't spend a lot of time with the kids during the week, we make it a point to spend a lot of family time together in the evening. And we spend enough on childcare that there is not much that will provoke us to drop another $80 or so on a babysitter so we can go out. Usually when we go out, it's for a concert (I just bought Eagles tix!! Last time it was the Foo Fighters). And we usually catch a couple of hockey games each season.
But tonight we're going to the movies. I can't even tell you the last grown-up movie I saw at a theater. PS was invited to a sleepover party and the twins are going to a Halloween-themed Kid's Night Out at our local gymnastics place. $40 for the twins, but they will have a blast and it's half what we would spend on a sitter.
It'll be nice to have some kid-free time together. (I know DH gets little mention on the blog, but we really do like each other.) Especially because he's taking off for Boston next week, leaving me as a single-parent all week.
But tonight we're going to the movies. I can't even tell you the last grown-up movie I saw at a theater. PS was invited to a sleepover party and the twins are going to a Halloween-themed Kid's Night Out at our local gymnastics place. $40 for the twins, but they will have a blast and it's half what we would spend on a sitter.
It'll be nice to have some kid-free time together. (I know DH gets little mention on the blog, but we really do like each other.) Especially because he's taking off for Boston next week, leaving me as a single-parent all week.
10/17/08
I have incestuous gay cats
So we kept two of the male kittens from the litter that we found in the flowerbeds. And they have always been very cozy. Soon after we gave their siblings away, we noticed that Voldy would pin Harley down to suckle his teats. This went on for a couple of weeks. And they groom each other and really like to cuddle.
But this morning, Voldy started, ummm grooming Harley's furry little naughty bits. Which Harley apparently enjoyed--a lot. DH and I were staring in shock when SS walked up and said, "Voldy must have hurt Harley because it looks like he's bleeding!" Yeah, cause Harley's tiny red pecker was out. I wasn't even going there at 7:30 in the morning when we were trying to get ready for our day so I just nodded and agreed, "umm, yeah, I guess he's hurt" and shooed the cats apart.
Is this normal cat behavior? I've never had a pair of cats before. We're pretty tolerant, but I could live without the kitty porn.
But this morning, Voldy started, ummm grooming Harley's furry little naughty bits. Which Harley apparently enjoyed--a lot. DH and I were staring in shock when SS walked up and said, "Voldy must have hurt Harley because it looks like he's bleeding!" Yeah, cause Harley's tiny red pecker was out. I wasn't even going there at 7:30 in the morning when we were trying to get ready for our day so I just nodded and agreed, "umm, yeah, I guess he's hurt" and shooed the cats apart.
Is this normal cat behavior? I've never had a pair of cats before. We're pretty tolerant, but I could live without the kitty porn.
10/15/08
The lawyer you don't want to be...
The Chatty Cathy. This is the lawyer who is apparently completely unconcerned about her billables, because she will spend excessively long stretches of time yapping your ear off if given the slightest opportunity. This isn't a friendly co-worker stopping by to say "hi" or to give you the 10 minute run-down on her date last night.
No, the Chatty Cathy parks it in your office and traps you there as she hashes out ever detail of her day--no matter how mundane. Oh--and you never get the chance to get a word in edgewise--its all about her. And she is oblivious to your not-so-subtle hints that she needs to get back to work. Like returning to your reading or typing. You find yourself praying that the phone will ring so that she has to leave, and plotting whether you can reach your Blackberry and email your secretary to call you without her noticing.
Whenever anyone else walks by, you yell out your door, "Oh, hi--were you looking for me--what do you need?" Of course, this random person is clueless unless she, too, has been trapped by the Chatty Cathy. Then the look of pleading in your eyes is all too familiar.
So, my words of wisdom as an almost-second-year lawyer--don't be the Chatty Cathy. Keep the chit-chat short--or make plans for lunch or drinks after work. Even if you may like working until midnight, I prefer to get my billables in during normal working hours. And pay attention to what is going on around you--if I start typing, it means I really don't have time for this right now.
No, the Chatty Cathy parks it in your office and traps you there as she hashes out ever detail of her day--no matter how mundane. Oh--and you never get the chance to get a word in edgewise--its all about her. And she is oblivious to your not-so-subtle hints that she needs to get back to work. Like returning to your reading or typing. You find yourself praying that the phone will ring so that she has to leave, and plotting whether you can reach your Blackberry and email your secretary to call you without her noticing.
Whenever anyone else walks by, you yell out your door, "Oh, hi--were you looking for me--what do you need?" Of course, this random person is clueless unless she, too, has been trapped by the Chatty Cathy. Then the look of pleading in your eyes is all too familiar.
So, my words of wisdom as an almost-second-year lawyer--don't be the Chatty Cathy. Keep the chit-chat short--or make plans for lunch or drinks after work. Even if you may like working until midnight, I prefer to get my billables in during normal working hours. And pay attention to what is going on around you--if I start typing, it means I really don't have time for this right now.
Boss's Day--WTF?
I grabbed a sandwich for lunch and decided to splurge on a cookie from the bakery in the basement of my building. As I approached the line I saw my secretary. I walked up behind her and tried to say something, but she was oblivious to my presence. Before I can catch her attention, she asks the bakery worker--"so what are you going to have available for Boss's day?" I hightail it out of there, before she notices me (I hope) in an effort to avoid an awkward situation.
SO, who the hell came up with this fake wannabe holiday? Is it just intended to create awkwardness? I don't want anything from my secretary and I'm sure not getting anything for my supervising attorneys. No one should be expected to buy gifts for the people they work for.
SO, who the hell came up with this fake wannabe holiday? Is it just intended to create awkwardness? I don't want anything from my secretary and I'm sure not getting anything for my supervising attorneys. No one should be expected to buy gifts for the people they work for.
10/10/08
Life
So posting has been light lately. Partly because life has just gotten busy with PS's gymnastics on Monday nights and TT's football practice on Thursday nights and all those other things that get crammed into a week.
Partly because it's the time of year where allergies are kicking in and my eyes hurt so badly by the end of the day that I want to scratch them and the thought of looking at a computer screen for one more second is pure torture.
Partly because there is a lot of stuff going on that I just can't blog about. Like work. I really wish I could blog more about what lawyer life is like, but a lot of it could be construed as negatively portraying my firm and, well, I'd like to keep my job. I'm anonymous, but not that anonymous and I know that anyone who really wanted to find me could. But I do wish I could give a more accurate portrayal of life as a new lawyer.
One thing I can say is that Big Boss and Partner took me to a swanky restaurant earlier this week to thank me for all the effort I've been putting in lately. We've been getting tons of new cases and I have had to help out quite a bit when one of our attorneys who was pregnant had her baby early. She usually doesn't have any help on her cases, and she hadn't yet briefed anyone on her caseload, so it has been a challenge to get up to speed on cases that I know absolutely nothing about--while trying not to step on her toes or give the impression that I am trying to take over her cases. (She is very quiet, and we don't know each other well.)
But overall, it is going ok--with a little craziness mixed in.
Partly because it's the time of year where allergies are kicking in and my eyes hurt so badly by the end of the day that I want to scratch them and the thought of looking at a computer screen for one more second is pure torture.
Partly because there is a lot of stuff going on that I just can't blog about. Like work. I really wish I could blog more about what lawyer life is like, but a lot of it could be construed as negatively portraying my firm and, well, I'd like to keep my job. I'm anonymous, but not that anonymous and I know that anyone who really wanted to find me could. But I do wish I could give a more accurate portrayal of life as a new lawyer.
One thing I can say is that Big Boss and Partner took me to a swanky restaurant earlier this week to thank me for all the effort I've been putting in lately. We've been getting tons of new cases and I have had to help out quite a bit when one of our attorneys who was pregnant had her baby early. She usually doesn't have any help on her cases, and she hadn't yet briefed anyone on her caseload, so it has been a challenge to get up to speed on cases that I know absolutely nothing about--while trying not to step on her toes or give the impression that I am trying to take over her cases. (She is very quiet, and we don't know each other well.)
But overall, it is going ok--with a little craziness mixed in.
Overheard
The twins just signed up for the chess club, so they dragged out our chess set and decided that they would start practicing.
I heard TT say, "I'll trade you my knight for your king."
"Ok, deal," SS responded.
I said, "I don't really think that's how you play chess."
To which TT replied, "We know, but Daddy won't get off his bottom and come help us because he's lazy."
Oops! It's really hard to lecture your children about being respectful to adults when you are laughing hysterically.
I heard TT say, "I'll trade you my knight for your king."
"Ok, deal," SS responded.
I said, "I don't really think that's how you play chess."
To which TT replied, "We know, but Daddy won't get off his bottom and come help us because he's lazy."
Oops! It's really hard to lecture your children about being respectful to adults when you are laughing hysterically.
10/2/08
Sucky, sucky, sucky day
Today just sucked. It was one of those days where everything is just off-kilter all day long. It started this morning, when I had to go into the school to drop the girls off and speak to the cranky ladies in the office. Then traffic sucked. Then I got to work, and before I even make it to my office my secretary informs me that I am on the naughty list.
The naughty list is the list that the office accountant sends out to the entire office every week informing us who doesn't have their time in. I am on it about half the time, because my time has to be approved by Partner before it is sent to accounting, and he tends to let it sit on his desk. The end of the month is the most important, because that is when the bills go out.
Of course, Partner had not approved by time, so I was on the list. And Partner was out of town this morning. I called the accountant the second I got to my office to explain the situation. He was a complete and total jackass to me on the phone. He gets this way a lot. Our 60 year old accountant has mood swings like a 14 year old girl. He is known for his pissy moods-but it usually isn't directed at me.
I mean, I would have understood irritation. I get that we are on a tight schedule at the first of the month--but he was really an asshole. A few minutes later Big Boss came in and I asked him to approve my time. In the meantime, Accountant blasted off two more office-wide emails informing everybody that I was the lone holdout in submitting my time. By 9:15 this morning my time was in. I dashed off an email, biting my tongue the whole time, politely telling the accountant that my time had been submitted.
He writes back, "was it approved." And I responded, "No, your temper tantrum terrified me into throwing caution to the wind and submitting my time, to hell with whether it had been approved or not." Then I added, "Of course it has been approved."
30 seconds later the phone rang. Accountant, "I need to know if your time is approved."
"I told you it was approved."
"How was it approved--did you get an email." Ok, he has never ever asked how my time is approved --and it is always approved orally. So now he is basically accusing me of lying. However, Big Boss just happens to be standing outside my office and hears this exchange.
Big Boss says, "Tell him I said your time is approved, it's done, he needs to do the billing."
So I relay that information to Accountant, who huffs, "I don't understand why you are being so ugly to me." To which I respond, "Ditto."
A couple of minutes later he sends another email complaining about my attitude. I didn't respond.
Ok, I'll admit, it was not a shining morning of professionalism. I probably should have kept my mouth shut. The secretaries were glad to see me stand up to him. He treats everybody like crap--but they couldn't get away with standing up to him.
The rest of the day went down hill from there. Big Boss was in the office, and throwing new projects at me all day. One of our attorneys just had her baby a month early, and he is freaking out and handing me her stuff. I'm not sure how happy she is about all this. I don't want to step on her toes, but I can't exactly refuse a project Big Boss hands me, so I am doing my best to copy her on email to keep her in the loop.
Then I made a pretty minor error in a letter to the client. But, as Partner pointed out, sending stuff to this client (who is in-house counsel) is like getting your homework graded. He catches freaking everything. So Partner was mildly irritated with me.
And then one of my kids' teachers won't respond to my notes and emails. And my kids' doctor won't let me take all three kids at once for their checkups (I think this is going to mean a new doctor.) And I'm going to have to go lawyer to get my claim paid from when my car was broken into.
And my glasses broke right across the bridge for no apparent reason. The good news is that they are under a breakage warranty, so it is only $20 to replace them. But while I was at the eyeglass store, I asked about my lenses which have developed these strange spots, where it looks like the lens coating is coming up. They said that for another $10 I could have the lenses replaced. I said that I have no problem paying for the broken frames because they don't know what happened (although, really, they literally just broke apart in my hands while I was cleaning them), but that the problem with the lens coating was clearly a manufacturing defect and I should not have to pay a copay to have them repaired. The huffy sales girl said, "well, I can't make that call--you have to talk to a manager." And then they tried to tell me that the only warranty they offer is the breakage warranty with a co-pay.
Of course I wanted to see this actual "warranty" and they didn't have one in the store. They had to get another store to fax it over. And of course it is not a warranty but a replacement plan, and thus is not intended to cover a manufacturing defect.
The girl said, "Well, this is the only warranty we offer." And I replied (much snottier than necessary), "actually it's not. Under the law, there is an implied warranty offered on all goods unless you specifically disclaim it--which you did not." And of course, I get the "we can't make that call" line again.
So I paid the $20, got new frames, and still don't have the lenses fixed. Yeah, I should have paid the damn $10--and probably would have if I hadn't already been in a royally shitty mood. But I'll take it up with the manager and get the lenses fixed and probably spend $500 worth of lawyer time doing it to save $10. Yeah--I'm totally logical when I'm pissy.
The bright spot in my day--a pair of fabulous red suede heels were sitting with the mail when I got home. So I changed into shorts and a tank top and wore my fabulous heels (they make me feel like Dorothy) around the kitchen while I busted into one of DH's beers and pulled dinner together before DH and the girls got home from football practice.
Thank god tomorrow's Friday. Darn right.
The naughty list is the list that the office accountant sends out to the entire office every week informing us who doesn't have their time in. I am on it about half the time, because my time has to be approved by Partner before it is sent to accounting, and he tends to let it sit on his desk. The end of the month is the most important, because that is when the bills go out.
Of course, Partner had not approved by time, so I was on the list. And Partner was out of town this morning. I called the accountant the second I got to my office to explain the situation. He was a complete and total jackass to me on the phone. He gets this way a lot. Our 60 year old accountant has mood swings like a 14 year old girl. He is known for his pissy moods-but it usually isn't directed at me.
I mean, I would have understood irritation. I get that we are on a tight schedule at the first of the month--but he was really an asshole. A few minutes later Big Boss came in and I asked him to approve my time. In the meantime, Accountant blasted off two more office-wide emails informing everybody that I was the lone holdout in submitting my time. By 9:15 this morning my time was in. I dashed off an email, biting my tongue the whole time, politely telling the accountant that my time had been submitted.
He writes back, "was it approved." And I responded, "No, your temper tantrum terrified me into throwing caution to the wind and submitting my time, to hell with whether it had been approved or not." Then I added, "Of course it has been approved."
30 seconds later the phone rang. Accountant, "I need to know if your time is approved."
"I told you it was approved."
"How was it approved--did you get an email." Ok, he has never ever asked how my time is approved --and it is always approved orally. So now he is basically accusing me of lying. However, Big Boss just happens to be standing outside my office and hears this exchange.
Big Boss says, "Tell him I said your time is approved, it's done, he needs to do the billing."
So I relay that information to Accountant, who huffs, "I don't understand why you are being so ugly to me." To which I respond, "Ditto."
A couple of minutes later he sends another email complaining about my attitude. I didn't respond.
Ok, I'll admit, it was not a shining morning of professionalism. I probably should have kept my mouth shut. The secretaries were glad to see me stand up to him. He treats everybody like crap--but they couldn't get away with standing up to him.
The rest of the day went down hill from there. Big Boss was in the office, and throwing new projects at me all day. One of our attorneys just had her baby a month early, and he is freaking out and handing me her stuff. I'm not sure how happy she is about all this. I don't want to step on her toes, but I can't exactly refuse a project Big Boss hands me, so I am doing my best to copy her on email to keep her in the loop.
Then I made a pretty minor error in a letter to the client. But, as Partner pointed out, sending stuff to this client (who is in-house counsel) is like getting your homework graded. He catches freaking everything. So Partner was mildly irritated with me.
And then one of my kids' teachers won't respond to my notes and emails. And my kids' doctor won't let me take all three kids at once for their checkups (I think this is going to mean a new doctor.) And I'm going to have to go lawyer to get my claim paid from when my car was broken into.
And my glasses broke right across the bridge for no apparent reason. The good news is that they are under a breakage warranty, so it is only $20 to replace them. But while I was at the eyeglass store, I asked about my lenses which have developed these strange spots, where it looks like the lens coating is coming up. They said that for another $10 I could have the lenses replaced. I said that I have no problem paying for the broken frames because they don't know what happened (although, really, they literally just broke apart in my hands while I was cleaning them), but that the problem with the lens coating was clearly a manufacturing defect and I should not have to pay a copay to have them repaired. The huffy sales girl said, "well, I can't make that call--you have to talk to a manager." And then they tried to tell me that the only warranty they offer is the breakage warranty with a co-pay.
Of course I wanted to see this actual "warranty" and they didn't have one in the store. They had to get another store to fax it over. And of course it is not a warranty but a replacement plan, and thus is not intended to cover a manufacturing defect.
The girl said, "Well, this is the only warranty we offer." And I replied (much snottier than necessary), "actually it's not. Under the law, there is an implied warranty offered on all goods unless you specifically disclaim it--which you did not." And of course, I get the "we can't make that call" line again.
So I paid the $20, got new frames, and still don't have the lenses fixed. Yeah, I should have paid the damn $10--and probably would have if I hadn't already been in a royally shitty mood. But I'll take it up with the manager and get the lenses fixed and probably spend $500 worth of lawyer time doing it to save $10. Yeah--I'm totally logical when I'm pissy.
The bright spot in my day--a pair of fabulous red suede heels were sitting with the mail when I got home. So I changed into shorts and a tank top and wore my fabulous heels (they make me feel like Dorothy) around the kitchen while I busted into one of DH's beers and pulled dinner together before DH and the girls got home from football practice.
Thank god tomorrow's Friday. Darn right.
9/28/08
The Talk
Last night we were finishing up dinner when I sent the twins out to get the mail. They were taking longer than I thought they should, so I went to check on them.
TT: "Hey mom, you got a movie."
SS: "We peeked at it."
TT: "It's 'Sex of the City.' That's a funny name for a movie."
SS: "TT, I think you said a bad word."
TT: "Sex isn't a bad word, it means . . ."
Me: "Hey, wait a minute. First, sex isn't a bad word. Second, TT, what do you think sex means?"
TT: "It means when grown-ups love each other."
Me: "Well, not exactly. Remember how we talked about when grown-ups love each other they give each other a special hug, and that's how babies get made? Well, that is called sex."
SS: "Yeah--but how does a hug make a baby?" Clearly they weren't going to let me off easy on this one.
Me: "Well, remember how we talked about girls and boys have different parts?"
TT: "Yeah--girls have a hole and boys have a wiener."
Me: "Umm, yeah. The girls part is called a vagina and the boys part is called a penis. So during the special hug the man puts his penis into the woman's vagina, and that's how a baby gets made."
SS: "Yeah, but how does the baby get in there?" Ok, these kids are really wanting the dots connected.
Me: "Well, the man has this juicy stuff inside his penis that has these little fishy things called sperm, and so the juicy stuff comes out inside the woman's vagina and meets with an egg and then they become a cell that grows and grows until it becomes a baby."
TT & SS: "Ewwwww."
TT: "So the cells just keep making more and more and more--like the germ video that we watched at school? It started with just one and then it kept making more and more and more?"
Me: "Yeah--kinda. The cells just keep multiplying just like with germs." I have now equated a baby with the flu.
TT: "But which part of the baby is made first--the stomach?"
Me: "Sort of. The baby starts out as a blob--so I guess it's kind of like the stomach. But as it keeps growing it starts to grow arms and legs and then fingers and toes. So, do y'all have any more questions."
TT: "What are the girl parts called again?"
I wasn't exactly planning to have this talk with the girls yet. I had had it with PS a while back, but the twins still seem so young. But the opportunity presented itself and they were curious. I would rather they get accurate (ok, semi-accurate) information from me than misinformation from other kids. And they were very open about this and not embarrassed to be talking about it--something I hope will continue as they get older.
DH and PS meanwhile were still lingering at the dinner table. Apparently once they caught wind of our conversation, PS went into the pantry and closed the door because she didn't want to hear it. DH, wasn't about to walk in on the middle of this conversation. He is just relieved that we have all girls and I am the one who gets to deal with this kind of thing.
Oh, and about the movie: I watched it last night and did not really like it. Spoiler alert--stop now if you haven't seen this movie and intend to.
I can't believe Carrie went back to Big after what he did. I mean, even if you aren't sure, you go through with the damn wedding that the whole worked knows about. Get divorced 2 weeks later. Or just don't ever sign the marriage certificate. By the end of the movie, she was blaming herself. Hello--he's an adult and could have put a stop to the big brou-ha-ha well ahead of time if that's not what he wanted. If he didn't care enough about her to not publicly humiliate her, then they had no business getting married in the first place.
TT: "Hey mom, you got a movie."
SS: "We peeked at it."
TT: "It's 'Sex of the City.' That's a funny name for a movie."
SS: "TT, I think you said a bad word."
TT: "Sex isn't a bad word, it means . . ."
Me: "Hey, wait a minute. First, sex isn't a bad word. Second, TT, what do you think sex means?"
TT: "It means when grown-ups love each other."
Me: "Well, not exactly. Remember how we talked about when grown-ups love each other they give each other a special hug, and that's how babies get made? Well, that is called sex."
SS: "Yeah--but how does a hug make a baby?" Clearly they weren't going to let me off easy on this one.
Me: "Well, remember how we talked about girls and boys have different parts?"
TT: "Yeah--girls have a hole and boys have a wiener."
Me: "Umm, yeah. The girls part is called a vagina and the boys part is called a penis. So during the special hug the man puts his penis into the woman's vagina, and that's how a baby gets made."
SS: "Yeah, but how does the baby get in there?" Ok, these kids are really wanting the dots connected.
Me: "Well, the man has this juicy stuff inside his penis that has these little fishy things called sperm, and so the juicy stuff comes out inside the woman's vagina and meets with an egg and then they become a cell that grows and grows until it becomes a baby."
TT & SS: "Ewwwww."
TT: "So the cells just keep making more and more and more--like the germ video that we watched at school? It started with just one and then it kept making more and more and more?"
Me: "Yeah--kinda. The cells just keep multiplying just like with germs." I have now equated a baby with the flu.
TT: "But which part of the baby is made first--the stomach?"
Me: "Sort of. The baby starts out as a blob--so I guess it's kind of like the stomach. But as it keeps growing it starts to grow arms and legs and then fingers and toes. So, do y'all have any more questions."
TT: "What are the girl parts called again?"
I wasn't exactly planning to have this talk with the girls yet. I had had it with PS a while back, but the twins still seem so young. But the opportunity presented itself and they were curious. I would rather they get accurate (ok, semi-accurate) information from me than misinformation from other kids. And they were very open about this and not embarrassed to be talking about it--something I hope will continue as they get older.
DH and PS meanwhile were still lingering at the dinner table. Apparently once they caught wind of our conversation, PS went into the pantry and closed the door because she didn't want to hear it. DH, wasn't about to walk in on the middle of this conversation. He is just relieved that we have all girls and I am the one who gets to deal with this kind of thing.
Oh, and about the movie: I watched it last night and did not really like it. Spoiler alert--stop now if you haven't seen this movie and intend to.
I can't believe Carrie went back to Big after what he did. I mean, even if you aren't sure, you go through with the damn wedding that the whole worked knows about. Get divorced 2 weeks later. Or just don't ever sign the marriage certificate. By the end of the movie, she was blaming herself. Hello--he's an adult and could have put a stop to the big brou-ha-ha well ahead of time if that's not what he wanted. If he didn't care enough about her to not publicly humiliate her, then they had no business getting married in the first place.
9/20/08
Yes, I am insane
I have 9 girls spending the night, in addition to my own three. I am trying to just stay out of the way and let them do their own thing--but provide enough structured activities to keep them from fighting or acting like crazy people.
It is mostly going ok. But after they made sundaes they decided that everyone should try to eat face first (yeah--these are 10 - 11 year olds, I thought they were past this kind of thing) and one managed to get chocolate all over her shirt and now swears that her mom is going to kill her. So I have stain treated it and am washing it, but after the first run-through, it's not looking good.
The pillowcase decorating went much better. There was a lot of talk about boys. Apparently they don't understand why their dads don't like it when they talk about boys ("They were boys once, they should know that we think boys are cute.") And at least two of them have preceded a confession with , "This is a secret and my mom told me not to tell anybody..." So, FYI ladies, your kids will rat you out.
Speaking of... one of the dad's called at 3:30 this afternoon to ask if he could drop his daughter off at 4:00--2 hours before the party. He said he got called in to work and she wouldn't be able to come otherwise. It was no biggie, so I said that was fine. While his daughter was helping decorate I off-handedly said, "so your dad got called in to work, huh?" And she said, "no, not really. Some of his soccer friends just called and wanted him to go to the lake." Oops!
Overall, this group of girls is getting along very well. There are a few that I have not met before, so I was a little concerned. And one of the ones who is supposed to be here didn't show--which may be a good thing because I heard from a couple of sources that she and another girl don't get along. Oh, the drama of being a 10 year old girl.
It is mostly going ok. But after they made sundaes they decided that everyone should try to eat face first (yeah--these are 10 - 11 year olds, I thought they were past this kind of thing) and one managed to get chocolate all over her shirt and now swears that her mom is going to kill her. So I have stain treated it and am washing it, but after the first run-through, it's not looking good.
The pillowcase decorating went much better. There was a lot of talk about boys. Apparently they don't understand why their dads don't like it when they talk about boys ("They were boys once, they should know that we think boys are cute.") And at least two of them have preceded a confession with , "This is a secret and my mom told me not to tell anybody..." So, FYI ladies, your kids will rat you out.
Speaking of... one of the dad's called at 3:30 this afternoon to ask if he could drop his daughter off at 4:00--2 hours before the party. He said he got called in to work and she wouldn't be able to come otherwise. It was no biggie, so I said that was fine. While his daughter was helping decorate I off-handedly said, "so your dad got called in to work, huh?" And she said, "no, not really. Some of his soccer friends just called and wanted him to go to the lake." Oops!
Overall, this group of girls is getting along very well. There are a few that I have not met before, so I was a little concerned. And one of the ones who is supposed to be here didn't show--which may be a good thing because I heard from a couple of sources that she and another girl don't get along. Oh, the drama of being a 10 year old girl.
9/17/08
My car is jinxed
First, it was broken into in my driveway (it is almost always in the garage--a total fluke that it was in the driveway) and DH's fancy HD radio was stolen. Then I got a crack in the windshield coming home from a work trip. Then the driver's side window spontaneously shattered while sitting in my garage overnight. And today, the passenger-side window was busted out and my GPS was stolen.
The Suburban was sitting in the parking garage at work. The one with gates that is supposedly patrolled by security personnel. It looks like someone just took a baseball bat and shoved took a swing at the window. For a freakin' $150 GPS. They didn't touch the fancy radio or the 20 or so CD's in the console. PS's Nintendo DS and our portable GPS that we use for geocaching were in the back, and they are still there, too. Really--how much does a basic GPS get on the black market?
And you would think with the previous break-in that I would have learned my lesson about leaving stuff in the car. I never leave the Suburban on the driveway anymore, and if I am out shopping, I hide the GPS and the radio faceplate in the console. But I guess I felt safe in my security-patrolled parking garage. Ugh!
The Suburban was sitting in the parking garage at work. The one with gates that is supposedly patrolled by security personnel. It looks like someone just took a baseball bat and shoved took a swing at the window. For a freakin' $150 GPS. They didn't touch the fancy radio or the 20 or so CD's in the console. PS's Nintendo DS and our portable GPS that we use for geocaching were in the back, and they are still there, too. Really--how much does a basic GPS get on the black market?
And you would think with the previous break-in that I would have learned my lesson about leaving stuff in the car. I never leave the Suburban on the driveway anymore, and if I am out shopping, I hide the GPS and the radio faceplate in the console. But I guess I felt safe in my security-patrolled parking garage. Ugh!
Every Freakin' Year...
My kids' school, like many schools around the country, have subscribed to the AR reading system. Basically, they test at the beginning of the year to determine their AR reading level. Then they are required to read books on their assigned AR level and take 10 question quizzes which allegedly test their comprehension (I have my doubts). Books are assigned point levels based on their level of difficulty, and kids are encouraged to rack up as many points as possible.
My problem with the AR system is that it limits what the kids are allowed to read. The teachers repeatedly tell my kids that they can only read books on their assigned AR level--and the assigned AR level is always way below what they are actually reading.
I take my kids to the library or bookstore just about every weekend. I know what books they are reading--heck, I can barely keep them in books because they are all speedy readers performing well-above their grade level. (Which means they zip through the books with age-appropriate subject matter in record time.)
And, honestly, I have come to the conclusion that the AR leveling test is completely inaccurate. Because it always puts my kids below the level they are actually on--when all of their standardized testing puts they years above their grade level (although how many years I'll never know because my school won't test more than 2 years out and all of my kids always max out the tests--but that's another battle.)
So again this year, just like every other year since PS started school, I have to go to the teachers and request that my children be allowed to read anything they want. If the subject matter is questionable, I will read the book with them. But I refuse to have my children limited. Some of the teachers have been great on this issue--but with a couple of them, this has been a major battle, which I completely don't understand. I guess we'll see what happens this go 'round.
My problem with the AR system is that it limits what the kids are allowed to read. The teachers repeatedly tell my kids that they can only read books on their assigned AR level--and the assigned AR level is always way below what they are actually reading.
I take my kids to the library or bookstore just about every weekend. I know what books they are reading--heck, I can barely keep them in books because they are all speedy readers performing well-above their grade level. (Which means they zip through the books with age-appropriate subject matter in record time.)
And, honestly, I have come to the conclusion that the AR leveling test is completely inaccurate. Because it always puts my kids below the level they are actually on--when all of their standardized testing puts they years above their grade level (although how many years I'll never know because my school won't test more than 2 years out and all of my kids always max out the tests--but that's another battle.)
So again this year, just like every other year since PS started school, I have to go to the teachers and request that my children be allowed to read anything they want. If the subject matter is questionable, I will read the book with them. But I refuse to have my children limited. Some of the teachers have been great on this issue--but with a couple of them, this has been a major battle, which I completely don't understand. I guess we'll see what happens this go 'round.
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