Growing Up

It seems like PS has really grown up over the last few months, both physically and metaphorically. It makes sense--she's 13 and starting high school next year. But I'm not adjusting well to her new-found independence and the idea that she will be going off to college in only 4 short years.

She has grown several inches taller over the last year, finally surpassing the 5-foot mark.She used to be the smallest in her class, and while she's still on the smaller end of the spectrum, she's no longer the smallest. And she's filled out. We can finally buy junior's sizes in regular stores, instead of having to head out to junior's specialty stores. (There is a huge difference between an Old Navy size 0 and an AF or Delia's* size 0.)

She has developed her own unique sense of style. It trends a little goth, with a lot of black and skulls, but without the black eyeliner and Docs. And lots of ironic T-shirts. Our latest purchase is a pair of black Chuck Taylors.

And she has started spending more time with friends and less time with mom. She's had a phone for a while, but only over the last few months has the texting been ever-present in typical teenager fashion. And last week she informed me that all of her friends were going to see the Hunger Games after their theater performance, dashing my hopes of some mom/daughter time.

But I did get to take her and a friend to see her favorite band this week. She got the tickets for Christmas and has been waiting impatiently.  Unfortunately, all "seating" was standing-room only general admission, and I was envisioning mass hysteria with thousands of screaming girls shoving my petite PS to the back of the crowd.

Luckily, the venue was a smaller one, and it has an attached restaurant.  I got an email right before the concert that if we ate there, we got priority seating for the concert. And so we arrived early, had over-priced burgers, and were among the first 30 or so people in the door.  PS and her friend were dead center, right in front of the stage!!! (I went to get her a shirt, so I was a couple of people-rows behind them when I came back.)

It was indeed hysteria, with the crowd constantly pushing forward (I am too old for the pit!), but PS and her friend were able to hold their place and had a great view for the entire concert.  And I even caught a guitar pick that one of the band members threw. PS told me over and over how awesome the experience was. That's about as good as it gets for a mom of a teenager.


*BTW Delia's is a great place to buy jeans for petite girls.  The go down to a size 00 and they have several lengths for each size.

Don't Mess With Me, Door

We spent this morning repairing the door from my garage into the house.  Because last Tuesday I kicked it in like I was the Incredible Hulk's love child and in the process tore out the entire door frame.

I wasn't angry.  The door had been sticking for some time, and rainy weather of late had made the door swell to the point that it just wouldn't budge. It was pouring rain, and I really didn't want to go around front and get soaked. So I kicked it.  And completely underestimated my own destructive powers. The door was unharmed; it was the frame that suffered--which, of course, is way more difficult to replace than a door.

So on Thursday, I picked the girls up from school for a dentist appointment, and then headed over to Lowe's to see if I could figure out what I needed to do to repair the damage. The guys in Lowe's looked bemused when I told them my story, standing in a pencil skirt and stilettos with three kids in tow, and asked them if it was possible to purchase a door frame.

Surprisingly, it is. Or at least, a kit that to make a door frame.  I also picked up a new door knob for good measure, but declined the boring drill bit that they tried to talk me into (the frame kit does not have a pre-cut hole for your door lock to slide into) because I knew we already had one.

And so $50 and a couple of hours of labor later the door is fixed.  And DH was only a little irritated with me.

Happy 1000th Postaversary to Me!

 So, this is my 1000th post. I originally started this blog in fall 2004 when I started law school.  It didn't really get very far that first year because, well, I was entrenched in 1L and I had three-year-old twins and a six year old (hence, my title). But I had a reboot in August 2006, my 3L year, and I have been blogging consistently ever since.

When I began law school there were very few other law moms blogging. I think AAL and Suzie JD were both around back then under other names, and that was about it. So I started blogging as my own outlet, but also as a way to preserve my experiences for other law moms coming up behind me. I try to blog honestly, and I know that by doing so I don't always paint myself in the best light. I'm ok with that, but that's part of the reason I blog anonymously.

Anyway, to celebrate my 1000th post, I decided to go back and review my old posts to pull out to best, worst or most meaningful. I wanted 10, but ended up with 20. (No, I don't really think anyone is going to read all 20, but I started with 30 and 20 was the best I could do!) It seems that the most frequently used word on my blog is chaos.  I write about it a lot.  I definitely feel that my life is chaotic at moments, but I didn't realize that it was such an overarching theme of my life. But I guess I'm ok with that, because there's nothing that I really want to change.

I'm also going to borrow a page from LL's book and offer to answer any questions that anyone has a burning desire to ask.

And so, without further ado, the best of worst of LC from the last 7.5 years and 999 posts:

The Beginning:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2004/07/ok-so-i-got-into-law-schoo_109105493337658129.html

Mothers:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2006/02/how-do-you-break-up-with-your-mother-i.html

The hardest case I’ve ever worked on:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2006/02/public-stonings-should-be-reconsidered.html

Worst Exam ever, almost:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2007/05/con-law-makes-me-sick.html

The End:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2007/05/thats-all-folks.html

Really the worst exam ever:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2007/07/finally-made-it-to-dentist.html

But at least I passed:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2007/11/play-by-play.html

My first real job (nearly a full year after I graduated):

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2008/03/party-at-lcs-place.html

The decision to become a  working mom:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2008/05/decisions.html

Should you go to law school?

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2008/05/one-year-later.html

Where the girls aren’t:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2008/07/why-arent-there-more-women-in-courtroom.html

One Year In:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2008/11/one-year.html

Why I left my first firm:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2009/03/too-far.html

The stupidest and smartest thing I have ever done:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2009/05/done.html

A Week in the Life of an Attorney and Mom:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2010/10/week-in-life-of-working-mom.html

Setting Limits:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2010/05/setting-limits.html

My Most Controversial Post:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2010/05/making-mommy-proud.html

Religion:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2010/08/great-divide.html

Boys Drool and Girls Rule:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2011/02/why-i-am-superior-to-my-male.html

Lawyer Fun:

http://legallycertifiable.blogspot.com/2011/06/great-day-to-be-lawyer.html

So this is how my day went...

I took home a couple of over-stuffed boxed of documents to review of the weekend. I pulled the privileged docs and put them together on the top i nside the box. This morning I arrived at work and unloaded them from the back ofmy car. And then the 45 mph wind blew off the lid. While I was catching the lid, papers started blowing out of the box. Yep, the privileged docs.

Fortunately, there was a line of shrubbery about 15 yards away that seemed to catch them. So I crawled down on my hands and knees through the grass and mud in my work clothes and bright red stilettos yanking my privileged papers from the depths of the bushes.

Once the boxes were dealt with, I went to park my car in the underground parking garage. The weather was supposed to turn nasty, and I had just had my car washed and definitely did not want to risk it getting hailed on. But apparently when I had my car cleaned over the weekend, they piled everything in the car into a bag that the kids took into the house. Including my parking pass. So I had to park again and go up to my office and beg one of my coworkers to lend me her parking pass. On my way back down, Bob the secutiry guy told me I could have just borrowed his.

Finally got my car tucked away safe and sound, and headed up to my office. By then my perfectly coifed hair looked like I had just woken up and hadn't bothered to comb it.

I kindly held the door for an older lady behind me. Who proceeded to fart just as we stepped into the elevator. And then about 5 more people piled in, and I swear pushed every possible button and my floor is to top one for that elevator bank. You can only hold your breath for so long.

The rest of the day was insanely busy before I headed out the door at 7 hoping to avoid nasty weather on my way home (I did!)

Tomorrow's prospects don't look much better. DH has to be up at 4 to go to the airport, and I have to drive PS and her BFF to school at 6:45 for Theater UIL, before facing a long to-do list and then having to run home for soccer jersey pick-up followed by the twins soccer practice(but at least I don't coach that one) with no DH to help out with it all.

Just Breathe

The mini vacay was nice, but I'm pretty sure I was being punished today for the time away. It was pure insanity, and I barely had time to breathe. Every single one of my bosses put a new file on my desk today. Two were filings that had to be done today. I finished the first at 3:00 and the second at 6:15 before literally running out the door to make 7:00 soccer practice.

I felt far more competent filing a last-minute motion in federal court in a well publicized multi-million dollar case than I did teaching a bunch of little girls to play soccer. Our teenage helper wasn't around tonight, so DH and I were on our own. We rehashed the drills we did last week, and then let the girls scrimmage. Except that I didn't know how to start the game for the scrimmage. And I couldn't remember if you got a corner kick if you kicked the ball over the end line you were defending or trying to score on. And I didn't even bother trying to figure out when someone was offsides. Clearly all of my book reading and you-tube watching does not make up for practical experience.

The good news: DH and the girls bought me Reece's Peanut Butter cups when they were out running errands today. It is definitely a chocolate kind of day.

Spring Break!

After a crazy busy week, I get to take a few days off. The girls are out of school next week for spring break, so I took off through Wednesday. We've rented a cabin and are going to a beautiful area we've been visiting annually for the last few years. Typically DH and the kids fish while I read trashy magazines and drink wine. And we usually do a couple of river floats and hike a little. It's a nice trip because it's just peaceful and relaxing.

We've spent most of today shopping and doing laundry and packing. Thank goodness we're not leaving until tomorrow, because I never would have gotten it all done otherwise.

And this morning we had our first soccer practice. It went really well. I've been watching YouTube videos to learn drills, and I've read up on the rules. But it gets better! One of the girls has a 16 year old brother who plays elite soccer. He helped out with the drills and gave the girls tons of tips on their footwork. Yay! He was a huge help, and it is so nice to see teens who are willing to jump in and help out.

On an unrelated note, I have to admit that I feel like a weight has been lifted since my mother left. Having to care for one more person, plus having to specifically deal with her just left me overly stressed and walking around in a cloud of negativity. I am palpably happier now and I feel so much more in control of my life. Yay for normalcy!

I am officially certifiable now

I signed up all three girls to play in the church's recreational soccer league. The twins wanted to play with their BFF whose dad is also the coach.  It turned out that PS is in the same division, but she did not want to play with her sisters, so we asked that we put her on a different team.

We got an email from the twins' coach telling us all about practice times and when we would be starting.  But not a peep from PS's coach.  Turned out there was no coach.  So the church sent out an email saying, "there's no coach, we need a coach so the girls can start practicing, figure it out."  And nobody responded.

So, in a moment of pure insanity, I emailed the sports coordinator and told her that I could help out with the team.And now I am a soccer coach.

Brilliant, since I have never played soccer. Everyone who knows me finds it pretty hilarious that I am taking this on.  I'm not athletic.  at. all.  I'm the girl who got stress fractures in both ankles just from running.  And I've broken and sprained both ankles on other occasions, broken both arms on separate occasions, broken ribs, and had multiple broken toes. Grace and coordination are not my virtues.

And it gets better.  This is the church league.  It's supposed to be a ministry.  You're supposed to preach to the kids.  And I'm an atheist. Oh boy. I think I need the intervention of a higher power right about now.

But now I have a polyester coach's shirt (ick!), a matching visor (double ick!) and a whistle (yay!), so I guess I'm all set. And I went and bought "Soccer for Dummies" last night.

What the heck was I thinking?  I don't like other people's kids, I don't know how to play soccer, and I don't have an excess vat of time hiding out somewhere. I'm pretty sure I've lost my mind.

Losing Friends

Today I was unfriended on FB for the first time for political reasons. I'm pretty sure it's the first time I've ever really expressed a political opinion on FB.

The "friend" in question is DH's uncle who made an idiotic statement agreeing with Rush L. Really, how was I supposed to keep my mouth shut when someone agreed with that moron?

My initial response was an innocuous "babies cost a lot more than contraception.". The conversation degenerated from there-- especially when his wife joined the fray and said that the pill aborts embryos! (WTF?) And then some other crazy joined in and equated the pill with euthanasia.

And then I was unfriended, so I could no longer respond to the crazy. Which was surely for the best.

But seriously, the pill = abortion??? It is morally reprehensible to be preaching that crap.

Career Choices

If you saw some weird posts from me yesterday, please ignore.  I was re-reading some old posts and tried to re-post a couple that I had taken down that related to why I left my last job.  But they posted with yesterday's date instead of in their original timeline, so I took them right back down and prayed they didn't show up in anybody's news feed.

Anyway, I was reading posts from spring 2009 when I was at my last job. I may think life is tough these day, but it was so much worse back then.  I was working way too many hours, I earned a lot less, and the environment was absolutely toxic.

The named partner that I worked for was an asshole.  He was an asshole to opposing counsel and he was an asshole to everybody that he worked with.  I can see in my posts how I was always holding my breath around him--it was like living with an abusive spouse.  You just never knew when he was going to explode or when he was going to bring you (figurative) flowers.

The other partner I worked for wasn't an asshole (at least not in the same, overt, sense), but he didn't improve life.  He was obviously afraid of the named partner and had no problem letting me take the fall for things that weren't my fault. Fortunately, named partner liked me, so it wasn't career killing.  But I was constantly defending my staff, because I would rather suffer than them (and he would fire somebody for minor infractions).  It would have been nice to have had a superior who would go to bat for me every once in a while.

I've now been at my current job quite a bit longer than I was at that job, and I still have so much anger for the way I was treated there.

Over the last year I have contemplated whether to stay at my current firm or make another change. I know that I am on the partnership track at my current firm, and that I can stay with them for the rest of my career if that is what I want. And now, as a mid-level, is the time to make some decisions.

I will admit that I don't love my practice area. I sort of fell into it.  It can be dry.  I see a lot of the same issues over and over.  I want to be in court more, and we settle virtually everything. (But I think these issues may be the same in any commercial litigation practice.)

What keeps me here is that the environment is so much better than where I was.  I sometimes get frustrated with my bosses, and we all have our asshole days, but there is none of the relentless torture that I suffered as a young lawyer.  Any one of my bosses would stand up for me to another if it came down to it--but nobody is throwing me under the bus anymore, anyway. 

I don't work nearly the hours that I worked back then, and my compensation is much better. My billables are much lower, although I do a lot more nonbillable work, and I have never heard a peep about my billables. I have the flexibility to make appointments or work from home when I need to and not feel like I am being docked for it. And I actually like the people that I work with.

There is a whole lot to be said for all of that. I've been getting calls from recruiters lately, but they've got nothing that would entice me to leave.  I've seen the dark side and I don't want to go back there. And any pay increase would come with a much higher billable requirement.  I'm very happy with my work/pay balance, and I'm not very interested in taking more time away from my family just to make a little more money.

So, in the end, I choose a better working environment over a choice practice area. (And don't get me wrong, I do love my job.) Besides, it's kind of fun to see the quizzical look of people's faces when I tell them what kind of law I practice, because no one ever expects it.

Whirlwind Weekend

Friday started with me rushing out the door to make a 9:00 meeting.  I was running behind because I spent too much pondering the perfect outfit for an early-evening "business casual" event at a national convention in San Antonio.

Usually I interpret business casual as a cardigan and dress pants, but that just didn't seem quite right this time. And I had to fly to this event, so I needed something that could also stand up to marching through the airport, disrobing for security, and the general disheveldness that comes with a day of work and travel.

So I took a while figuring it all out, but I think I came up with just the right ensemble.

And then, on my way out the door, I noticed a hole in the seam of my skirt.  No time to change and it was mostly covered by my top, so I just grabbed a safety pin and kept on moving.

Made it to my meeting with 5 minutes to spare.  I spent the rest of my morning tying up loose ends before the weekend and sewing up my skirt in the ladies room (tiny sewing kit = best conference swag ever).

Left the office at noon to head to the airport.  Had to go through the body scanner.  Not happy.

One of my bosses was on the same flight, so we took a cab from to the event venue.  But the cab driver dropped us off at the wrong location and disappeared.  He left us at a martini bar and we were going to a wine bar.  Fortunately, the martini bartender was kind enough to give me directions and we were only a couple of blocks away.

The event went really well and I was happy with my choice of outfits.

Four of us (three partners and me) were on the same late flight home, which kept getting delayed, leaving us with a few hours to kill after the event. And so P1 says, "Let's go see the Alamo." And the rest of us say, "what?" And P1 says, "we have to go see the Alamo.  It's only a few blocks from here and it's Texas Independence Day."

And so we take off in the direction we think the Alamo might be.  In the dark.  And I am in 3" heels.

We wander a bit and do not find the Alamo. We ask for directions and find that we have somehow circled around the Alamo. We eventually do find the Alamo, take a few pics, and then say, "ok we've seen the Alamo, now what?"

P1 says, "now we have to see the River Walk."  Really?  My feet are freaking killing me.

Fortunately the River Walk is really close to the Alamo.  And so we were able to hit all of the touristy San Antonio hot spots in under an hour. We walk a bit more (now my calves are cramping), the guys start to take pity on me, and we eventually find a bar to chill out in until our much-delayed flight.

On the way home we see fireworks from the plane.  Very cool.

I get home very late and I am very tired.

But I have to get up at 6:00 this morning because I volunteered to work the twins' school carnival/5k. And I volunteered to pick up 3 of PS's friends who are volunteering to work the carnival. And so by 7:00 I am driving all over town picking up overly chipper teenagers. I take then to the school, cheer DH in the race,run up the bids on the silent auction, and help out with the carnival until the very end at 1:00, and then return all of the now-obnoxious teenagers back home.

Go to lunch with the family and then to the sporting goods store to buy cleats before soccer starts next week.  Because my girls have giant adult--sized feet I had to pay much more for shoes than I wanted to, and $170 later they are ready for soccer.

Whew!  Not much else on the agenda except for a trip to Costco tomorrow (which is literally 2 minutes from my house--I've timed it!), but I think I've already crammed a couple of weekends in here.