Finally made it to the dentist

Yes, I did have an abscess--which I had pretty much figured out. Nothing else hurts that much. I'd rather give birth again. The root was dead and the tooth was necrotic. I don't know how something that is dead can hurt so much. And the Dentist had just seen me twice within the last 6 weeks about that very tooth. I'm thinking he missed something, but he was so nice and accommodating that I didn't call him out on it. I think I am tired of being in cranky lawyer mode.

Anyway the dentist did a partial root canal and will finish the job in a couple of weeks after we get back from our trip. The root canal wasn't too bad. But the numbness hasn't worn off yet. On the bright side, I got even better pain meds. And two new antibiotics, since the last one didn't do anything for the infection.

So I got to combine two of the most painful experiences of my life. Yea me. Years from now I will be telling all the newbies, "Yeah you think you had it tough, I took the bar with an abscessed tooth."

It's over

I was more than a little concerned after the morning session. The bar examiners were playing curel mind games with us. We are supposed to have 12 essays. 2 wills, 2 UCC, 2 family law, 2 business associations, 2 property (1 usually oil & gas), 1 consumer law & 1 trusts or guardianships. The essays are always given in pairs with the two odd ones together.

When I opened my essay booklet I had no freakin' clue what area of law it was testing. That seemed like a bad sign. But I had the common sense to look at the next question to determine what the pair was. The next question was consumer law. So the first should have been trusts or guardianships. It was definitely not a trusts or guardianships. I put it aside and did the other 5 questions. They were strange. Odd details. The damn commercial paper question didn't ask about holder in due course or negotiability--which are about the only things I have to say about commercial paper. The other UCC was all about repossession--I think I did ok, but I'm not sure I hit all the notice requirements. The first property question left me completely clueless--I answered it like a contract question (it was about an option on a land contract). I was thrilled to see an oil & gas question. At least I understand and can answer oil and gas. Finally got back to the initial mystery question and determined it was about agency. WTF? Agency isn't supposed to be paired with consumer law.

The afternoon session went much better. I felt really comfortable with all of the essays. Nothing crazy like this morning. But no trusts/guardianship questions. As I was leaving, a girl I didn't know said, "Wasn't there supposed to be a trusts or guardianship question on here? There wasn't was there?" No apparently the bar examiners just wanted to screw with us.

Now I am exhausted. I will veg until I pass out. Tomorrow I may sleep till noon. I am so ready to disappear to the mountains--no TV, no internet, no cell phones (but running water and electricity, I'm not crazy). Just me and HP (oh yeah and the family--I missed my little rugrats!)

Just a little PSA

Thanks to Alexis for the tip. I thought this warning was worth passing along. Be careful what you blog.

The MBE, she is a bitch

I thought the morning session was really tough. But maybe its because I was a little bleary eyed. I did not sleep at all last night. I was having major dental pain, despite taking pain meds way more often than I was supposed to. I think I'm becoming an addict.

The afternoon session went much better, but it's so hard to guess how you did on the damn thing.

Tomorrow, 12 essays. This is what has me the most concerned. I have lost all my cockiness of last week. The wait until November is going to be hell.

I'm ready to be done with the crappy hotel and return home. I have a dentist appointment on Friday. We are supposed to be heading to my grandfather's cabin in the middle of nowhere on Saturday--I guess we'll see what the dentist does to me.

I Survived Day 1

The MPT went better than expected. I put minimal time into preparing for it, but I think I did ok. The biggest problem was time management which I think was universal because one issue had several factors to analyze. No one left early.

The P&E was harder than I anticipated. A few of the questions seemed to fall out of the clear blue sky. I had worked several practice P&E's and had not seen anything like them. I know I got at least 75% right. Since it's short answer, it's pretty easy to gauge how you did--unlike the MBE where you have no freaking clue.

My plan was to go back to my room and review for tomorrows MBE. I had the choice of studying from the uncomfortable sofa, the desk with the too short chair, or the big comfy bed. Of course I chose the big comfy bed. And fell right to sleep. I don't feel too badly about it because I didn't sleep great last night. We are about 5 miles from an airport, and apparently all southbound planes pass directly overhead. And there is a train somewhere that went by at least 5 times last night--and I swear blew its horn for five minutes each time. And I am walking distance from a baseball stadium. And there was a game last night. And apparently everyone likes to blow their horns when they leave. So anyway, I figure the nap was well deserved, and I'll blog while I shake off the grogginess.

But to put things into perspective, on this day 6 years ago I made this, which is a far greater accomplishment than even passing the bar could be:

Good Luck to all the other bar takers

I am now tucked away in my bar hotel. We start tomorrow with a half day of MPT and Procedure & Evidence. It is sort of surreal that it is finally here.

I had previously complained that they started us off with the easiest stuff and a half day only to wind up day three with a full day of essays. But now I am kind of glad they are easing us into it. I am not too freaked out about tomorrow. And I am glad that I have that half day in the solace of my hotel to catch up since I was out of it all weekend.

Ugh. I can totally hear the guy in the room next to me peeing. Now I am going to be paranoid every time I have to go. I am so not impressed with this hotel. But at least it has free internet.

My life sucks

Still in a lot of pain. I do not know what is going on, but I guess I am going to have to actually see the dentist in the morning. I don't know what that is going to accomplish because there is absolutely no way on earth I am undergoing any kind of dental procedure tomorrow. Meanwhile, I am still popping pain pills which is causing me to sleep half the day. I have not worked any practice problems in two days, but I have gone through every single one of my 700 or so flashcards.

I am trying to convince myself that since I have treated this like a marathon I should be adequately prepared despite my inability to function the last two days. I usually find comfort in numbers, and this is what I am relying on right now.

My state's bar passage rate for first-timers: 80%
My school's bar passage rate: 90%
Bar passage rate is highly correlative to quality of school and grades.
I have put in about 400 hours of preparation (including time sitting in barbri).
I have worked about 1500 MBE's.
I have worked about 75 essays.
I have read the whole dang conviser.
I went to all barbri lectures.
I reviewed and condensed notes from lectures into flashcards and flowcharts.
I am averaging about 80% on practice MBE's.

I am praying all that is enough. I am terrified that because the last minute push never happened it will kill me. I am also terrified that I will be in major pain when I take the test because I can't take pain medication. My biggest fear has always been that I would get some mystery illness when the time came.

Yeah, I know my blog has been an emotional roller coaster for the last few weeks. And now it sounds like I've gone off the deep end. Hopefully in a couple of weeks I will return to normal and not the emotional ranty bitchy whiner of the last two months.

Feeling a bit better

My dentist does not keep Saturday hours but I called his emergency number. He wasn't even in town, but called me in antibiotics and pain pills. The pain is finally under control, but I am so sleepy. TT and I just took a 2 hour nap on the sofa. Not exactly helping with my studying, but I'm hoping that the much needed rest is almost as valuable as studying. I haven't slept in weeks. When I get stressed I have crazy hallucinogenic dreams. At least 3-4 times a night I wake up sitting straight up in bed thinking that I am fighting something off.

Hopefully by tomorrow the antibiotics will have kicked in and I can lay off the pain pills. (I did not inform my dentist that I had already started antibiotics from an old prescription that I had never finished. Fortunately he prescribed exactly the same thing. Yeah, I know that's bad and that you are supposed to take the whole thing--but I have a terrible time remembering to take pills.)

Meanwhile, I have decided that this whole episode is psychosomatic. It seems every time I get really stressed I get some kind of an ailment. Like my last round of finals where I had three back to back and developed the worst migraine of my life. I really hope that I am right about the psychosomatic thing, because if not I am pretty sure I am going to need a root canal. The pain is stemming from a tooth that was recently filled for the second time and is waiting for a crown once I am done with orthodontics.

I'm a big fat whiner

Yesterday morning I developed this pain radiating from my teeth on the right side of my mouth. It would come and go, but got progressively worse throughout the day. Tylenol was not helping at all. Finally before bed I was in enough pain to take the Vicodin left over from my gum surgery. (I usually have a fairly high pain tolerance and avoid taking strong pain meds.) It did not help much and I woke several times during the night and even took a second pill.

I called my orthodontist first thing this morning and he got me in immediately. (He is so sweet--he even sent me a note wishing me good luck on the bar.) We both thought that my TMJ splint just needed to be adjusted. (This plastic guard thing I wear to keep me from clenching and aggravating the TMJ while I study for the bar.) Well, he fixed that this morning, and I am still in major pain.

I have not had dental pain like this since I had a tooth abscess a few years ago. I am pretty sure I don't have any cavities or abscesses because I just saw my general dentist about two weeks ago. But I just can't imagine this much pain merely from clenching. The only thing that has helped at all is a heating pad on my face.

I do not need to be losing study time right now. And what the heck am I going to do if this pain is not gone by Tuesday??? I guess I will try my general dentist in the morning--I think he has Saturday hours. And in the meantime I will sit here and feel sorry for myself. I so do not need this right now.

One Week

One week from tomorrow is the beginning of the end. It's also the twins birthday--so I will have to make up for my absence by spoiling them rotten.

I think that if the bar were this week instead of next that I could pass. (Oh god, I hope I haven't just jinxed myself.) I took a practice test from NCBE (the people who write the MBE) and got a 167. I have done pretty well on all of my practice essays--and I have done at least 6 in each subject. The only thing I am still struggling with is commercial papers--but I figure that if I just list the elements of negotiability and holder in due course I can squeeze out enough points to get by.

I almost wish the damn this was this week because I am so tired of studying for it, but there are still some areas that need work. I'd like to build up enough of a cushion to deal with any curve balls. And to walk out of the test feeling like I passed--is that possible? I heard rumors last year that many had a feel for how they did.

Anyway, I feel like I have reached bar zen. We'll see if it sticks around for the rest of the week. And if come November I am looking back on this post with horror at my own stupidity. To paraphrase Donald Rumsfeld, the biggest threats are things that you don't know you don't know.

Yeah, I'm a little cranky these days

This afternoon I was hunkered down in my little study closet working commercial papers essays (which were kicking my ass). And this jackass decides he needs to enter the study room next to mine to take a phone call. A 15 minute phone call. About nothing seemingly important enough to require that he disturb my studying.

The study rooms are not soundproof at all. I could hear every single word of his conversation as if he were sitting right next to me. (Apparently the girl he had been seeing was "decently cute." WTF does that mean? I think that comment pissed me almost as much as the fact that he was disturbing me.) I was trying to ignore him, but it just kept going on and on. I could feel my face flush with rage. I was seriously contemplating telling him to shut the fuck up. And then he started to wind it up. And finally he got off the damn phone and went back to his table outside the study rooms.

About that time I finished and had to use the bathroom. I shot him the evil eye on the way past. And then on the way back both he and his buddy were staring at me. I couldn't resist--I popped off, "For your information, these study rooms aren't sound proof at all." Them, "uh, ok." Me, "Yeah, I could hear every single word of your conservation. Really, we can all hear you." Them, "ok, we get it." I'm sure my bitchiness will entertain them for the evening.

Life in Solitary*

Ok, I am less freaked out than I was on Monday. The rest of the week has gone pretty well. Except today. I do not know what the hell is up with the property essays. There is no consistency, no common threads. I worked eight property essays today and none of them had anything in common. Except Oil & Gas. Yes, I am fortunate enough to live in a state that tests oil & gas law and apparently the bar examiners love it. Apparently the bar examiners also like to keep things interesting in property and test every freaking nuance. And of course they don't seem too interested in testing the stuff I already have to learn for the MBE.

On the bright side I have learned that I am really good at making crap up and it being pretty darn close to the actual right answer.

*Ran into a friend in the library who referred to studying for the bar as being like solitary confinement. That is pretty darn accurate. I spend 8 hours today by myself in a room the size of a closet.

For the first time, failure is an option

I haven't every really considered failing the bar. I mean, I have never in my life failed at anything I put at least a half-assed effort into. And so far in my studies I have managed to stay just ahead of the curve--and pretty much exactly where I need to be to pass.

Except now I have only two weeks left. Two Weeks. And I feel like I have plateaued. Even if I am at a borderline passing point, any surprises could be disastrous. I need to be way ahead of the curve at this point, but I am not doing any better than I was at the very beginning. I think I have forgotten half of what I have learned.

My studying today did not go well. I was working contracts questions, which is my second worst subject. I got the worst scores I have ever received. (With the tiny consolation that I was working only advanced questions.) Then I did an essay--which I felt only so-so about. Only when I went to grade the essay did I discover that I had already worked the exact same problem at some point in the last 6 weeks! How the hell did I not recognize it? How the hell could I not know the answers when I had already worked the same damn thing?

This is not looking good for me.

The Return to Chaos

DH and the girlies finally made it home yesterday after extending their stay an extra day. It was nice to have them all back and I blew off my study for the rest of the day to hang out with them. They were full of snuggles and hugs and kisses.

Then at 4:00 this morning TT came down to tell us that SS had thrown up. And TT had diarrhea.

Since barbri is over, today was supposed to be the first day of the final crunch, where I spend all day in the library. Instead, I called the nanny and told her not to come in because I'm not going to make anyone else deal with my barfy, runny kids.

So, in a showing of excellent parenting, they will be plopped in front of the tv recuperating all day while I try to get as much done as possible with three kids in the house. I am trying to keep them at arm's length because I so do not need to get sick right now, but the damage has probably already been done considering how snuggly they were yesterday.

The timing is right--and quiet

So I have been considering a silent timer for practice and the real thing, but a quick search revealed that the silent timers are about $30. I am inherently cheap and not about to spend that much cash on something that I will only need for the next couple of weeks and when I can foresee no possible future use.

That same search also led me to a message board where someone suggested a timer from Radio Shack from which the noise-making device could be removed.

So think morning, as I am setting my kitchen timer to start my practice MBE's I started thinking, surely it wouldn't be that hard to remove the noise maker. I'm a smart girl and I'm married to an engineer.* It took me all of two minutes to take out the two screws, identify the noise-maker (a round piece about the size of a quarter), and cut the wires. A-ha, silent timer.

Of course, now my kitchen timer is completely useless, but it think it was about $5 to begin with. Also, if you decide to try this at home, make sure your timer can be set for as long as you need. Mine only goes up to 99 minutes--something I failed to consider before I started snipping wires.

*The engineering thing is an inside joke. When DH got his master's in software engineering the undergrad valedictorian went on and on and on about how awesome engineers are and how theirs is the hardest program ev-ah and how engineers are going to take over the world.

I hate crim law!!

It is the only area I score below average in. The great irony being that crim law is what I have the most actual experience in and my top choice for a job is working for the DA's office.

Maybe if I didn't have to memorize three freaking bodies of law I could figure this crap out. I mean, first we have the imaginary common law that is not applicable--oh, anywhere. Then we have the MPC--again imaginary law not applicable anywhere. And finally we have my state's law, which I have to know for procedure & evidence, but not the MBE which only tests imaginary law.

Take conspiracy. I miss this one because I thought, "gee, there was an overt act, so there must have been a conspiracy." Oh wait, no, that is the law in the imaginary MPC jurisdictions, not in the imaginary common law jurisdictions. Arghhhh.

I think I need to go get a snow cone.*

*We have this new place that I swear has figured out how to make actual snow for their snow cones. And I don't even like snow cones because they are so sweet, but I discovered vanilla which is absolutely yummy. Like snow ice cream. Just thinking about it makes me less cranky.

WooHoo--Last day of barbri

Definitely cause for celebration, but at the same time it really emphasized how little time there is left.

For last day entertainment a mystery dog began running around the barbri room. The speaker was pretty much oblivious until the dog ran across the stage, followed by a little boy. Finally after being chased by at least three adults and the kid, the dog was caught and the lecture resumed.

No, I am not making this up. And I have absolutely no idea where the dog or the kid came from.

This is why I did not want to screw around with my hormones

Yeah, I'm breaking my promise to avoid girlie tmi.

I went to the store today and bought mac 'n cheese, mashed potatoes, and Ben & Jerry's. (Remember DH and the kids are out of town, so I am only shopping for me.) Clearly these are not the dietary selections of a hormonally balanced woman. Or one who doesn't want an ass the size of a blimp.

And my boobs are killing me in a way that usually only comes along with pregnancy. I swear I have gone up a cup size, and I definitely do not need help in this area. On the bright side, I don't think I've been too bitchy, but maybe that's just because I don't have anyone here to bitch at.

Meanwhile, I am getting a lot accomplished in my empty house. DH is considering staying an extra day and I am not really fighting it

My legislators have their priorities straight

I am so thrilled to learn that my state has passed a statute allowing trusts for the benefit of our animal friends.

I mean, they still can't figure out school finance and the lottery program is insolvent, but damn I'm happy to know that I can provide for Bob in my afterlife.

Home Alone on the Fourth of July

PS finally decided she was ready to come home, so DH took the rest of the week off and he and the twins headed to Hometown to visit his parents and retrieve PS. I have four days all to myself. This might sound like heaven if I weren't studying for the bar--but I actually have a lot to do.

This is the last week of barbri, and my goal is to catch up on all barbri assignments by the end of this week so that I can really dig in and review and practice for the last two weeks. I'm not so far behind that this is unmanageable, but I won't have a lot of time to slack, either. I would be a lot better off if I could leave the house to study today, but since nothing is open, that's not gonna happen. I'm just going to have to fend off the urge to nap that tends to overtake me when I study from home.

The F Word

This video if fucking hilarious. F Word - ebaumsworld.com

Maybe because I am expert at incorporating at least 4 forms of the word into a single sentence when driving in 5:00 traffic.

He is trying to send me over the edge

I will admit that I am a little touchy lately. But I swear DH just encourages it. We got into a tiff tonight over something completely ridiculous. But instead of leaving me alone to let it burn off, he has to follow me from room to room pestering me. Because in his tiny pea brain that makes things better. THAT DOES NOT MAKE THINGS BETTER. Leave me the hell alone when I am pissed off at you!