It's The Final Batman!

Yes, Batman arrived in a Tardis to battle Joker riding on a giant robot. It complimented our Very Whovian Christmas--I pretty much bought out the Doctor Who collections at ThinkGeek and Hot Topic.

There were not really any big ticket gifts for the girls this year.  When I asked them what they wanted for Christmas, all I got was "band merch" and 'Doctor Who stuff."  So that is what they got.

PS also asked for, and received, "the biggest set of Prismacolors you can find."  Those are pretty pricey, but not iPod pricey.  She is becoming an amazing artist, and we are trying to be supportive.  I've said for years that everyone needs to find the one thing they are better at than most people.  It took a while to figure it out, but for PS that thing seems to be art.  It's funny, because I really pushed her into taking an art class in high school because her course load was really tough and I thought she needed a blow-off class.  She had always been pretty good a drawing, but she really blossomed over the last year or so.  And she will spend hours working on one drawing--or how to perfect eyelashes.

A few years ago we got her a Bamboo digital drawing tablet.  It sat around, mostly unused for a while. But then she started teaching herself digital art  several months ago. And I am amazed. This is one of the first pieces that she did (the weird line is my doing) and she has only gotten better since:

So, yeah, she got her fancy pencils.  And she is talking about going to art school.  Which my pragmatic, conservative self wants to rail against.  But she loves art, and she is good at art. And all I really want for my children is for them to be happy in their career and life choices. 

Christmases Past and Present

This year we spent a quiet Christmas at home, just DH and the kids and me. I like our quiet family Christmases, but I wonder if we are depriving our kids by not giving them noisy, boisterous Christmases fully of cousins and aunts and uncles.

As as kid I had divorced parents and one set of divorced grandparents.  Christmas Eve and Day were filled with visiting family, sometimes as many as five different gatherings over the two-day period once step-parents were added into the mix. After DH and I were married and we added in his families' celebrations, things only got more chaotic. We never lived in Hometown during our married life, so the holidays always meant trekking back to Hometown and staying with his parents.

And then we had kids. It wasn't so bad making the rounds with just one kid.  But the first Christmas back home with the twins and I was done.  We had six celebrations to attend over the course of two days with 6 month old twins and a 3 year old in tow.  Needless to say, it was not a pleasant experience, and with that I said no more. From that point on we would be spending Christmas in our own home.  Anyone who wanted to join us was welcome, and we would come down after the holidays to visit our immediate families.

It was a good decision.  And our parents did come to visit a time or two, when the kids were little.  But then MIL got sick, and my relationship with my mother worsened, and most years it's just been the 5 of us. Now that the kids are older we sometimes travel, like last year.

Other years are like this one. On Christmas Eve we went to church, and then opened a few gifts and played games and watched movies together.  Christmas Day brought more gifts, and a day of lounging in our PJ's, playing with our new toys. It's a pretty good way to spend a holiday.  I just hope the kids feel the same.

More Batman!

Joker on Ice

Goin' Fishin'  Pretty Sure Batman has finally offed Joker.

Pinata! Batman likes his chocolate.

Can you spot me, Bro?

Sometimes you just need a hot bubble bath after long day of villianry and crime fighting.

Mary Poppins!  PS did this one all on her own because DH and I were out that night.

Hitting the booze.

Out of ideas

Paint me like on of your French girls, Jack. (PS came up with that caption.)

Kissing under the mistletoe.  Ok, they are supposed to be dancing, but the kids insist they look like they're kissing. We love Batman no matter which team he bats for.

And the crazy award goes to...

Yesterday I had a mediation.  It was, without question, the most insane mediation I have ever attended.

As per usual, it began with an opening caucus. But instead of formal opening statements, the mediator wanted to have an informal discussion.  This seemed ok because the parties already appeared close to an agreement, with one unresolved issue. It was a commercial litigation matter, so not the high emotion that one might see in a family law or personal injury case. The relationship between the parties and counsel had been cordial.

But a few minutes into the group session, and seemingly without a trigger, opposing counsel came unhinged.  He suddenly started yelling at my client, leaning across the conference table and pointing his finger in my client's face.

I leapt from my seat and positioned myself between opposing counsel and my client and said in my biggest, meanest mom voice, "You MAY NOT speak to my client like that." He kept yelling, and I kept repeating myself.  He stood up and I puffed up and stood my ground. He is at least 60 years old had a good 6" and nearly 100 pounds on me, but I was not going to back down or tolerate his rant.

And then he started blowing raspberries.  Yes, sticking out his tongue and spitting like a preschooler. I held my ground and said (in the big mean mom voice) "That is the most unprofessional behavior I have ever seen."

Meanwhile, the mediator was trying to regain control of the room.  Opposing counsel finally sat back down, but continued to blow raspberries. I stood my ground, and the mediator hustled the other parties out of the room.

In the end, the case settled and I got exactly what I asked for.

While it makes for an amusing story (much better when told in person), I  wonder about the impact on my professional reputation. Opposing counsel isn't an attorney I come across often, but the mediator's firm is a peer firm in our niche industry.  I hadn't worked with the mediator before, but he is well known in our niche industry, and I've worked with other attorneys in his office.  I have never yelled at another attorney before, and I don't want that story going around in a way that makes me seem like the crazy one.

Parenting Fail

I generally think we're doing ok at this parenting thing.  Our kids are liked and well mannered (at least in public).  They don't get into serious trouble and they do well in school.  They think about other people (unless those other people are their sisters). The time I felt the most incompetent was during potty training.  Until now.

PS's grades dropped severely this year.  She has historically been an A student, although she has struggled a bit with math for the last year or two.  This year she is all over the place in all of her classes--even English which should be easiest for her.

Since she is in high school, I generally expect her to fight her own battles, but her grades dropped to the point that we needed to intervene. We met with her AP history teacher several weeks ago and got a much better idea of his of his expectations and how she needed to be studying.  That class is truly preparing her for college-level work, and I have since worked with her on better study techniques (like how to create flash cards and a super detailed outline, instead of pages and pages of block notes). That grade went up, but the others kept falling, even though PS studies for hours every night and we hired a math tutor. So we finally called a meeting with her counselor to help figure out the problem and how to fix it.

The counselor was astonished when she saw PS's schedule with 6 PreAP/AP classes. She said nobody takes that many, especially sophomore year.  (PS swears that all her friends do, but all her friends are the robotics super nerds and in reality they probably are not taking the non-core Pre-AP classes.) And the counselor thought that her grades were ok, given her difficult course load.

But poor PS is overwhelmed.  She studies constantly, and has little free time. My normally stoic daughter was in tears last week because of her grades in relation to the amount of work that she is putting in.

And, of course, who do you think pushed her to take this course load? Yes, that would me. The mom who wants to give her daughter every opportunity to succeed and go to the best school possible. But it is coming at the risk of her mental health.  I see how overwhelmed she is.  I see how hard she is trying.  She often puts in longer days at school than I do at work, and then hours more studying at home. (I honestly think she studies more than I did in law school.)  She simply has more work than she has time for.

And so she is dropping a couple of the PreAP classes.  Her mental health is more important than showing a potential college that she can hack a super tough schedule.  And that tough schedule isn't really demonstrating anything if her grades are mediocre.

But I shouldn't have pushed her so hard.  We should have figured this out before now.  The first child truly is the guinea pig.  We won't make the same mistakes with her sisters.  You can talk Tiger Mama all you want, but kids need downtime. And frankly, teenage depression scares the shit out of me after a rash of suicides we have had in our community. I don't think PS is depressed, but she absolutely needed a reduction in stress levels. And reducing her stress levels reduces my stress levels.

Here's hoping the new year and new schedule brings some relief.

Batman on the Shelf

I've been quite disappointed over the last couple of years that my kids are too old for the Elf on the Shelf, that is sweeping Facebook and Pinterest.  He looks like so much fun! So this year, I decided that we needed to do our own, teenager version of the Elf on the Shelf.  So I got online and ordered an allegedly poseable Batman and a Joker, in case we wanted to mix it up a bit.

Batman and Joker arrived rappelling from the ceiling fan on dental floss with this note, and have proceeded to display their antics everynight:

Playing Battleship--although the girls pointed out that none of the hits actually matched where the ships are.  Oops.

Breaking into the Lucky Charms (By the way, I had no idea we even had Lucky Charms.  The twins went to the grocery store and I let them pick from the cereal that was on sale and obviously was not paying attention to what they threw into the cart.  But it is a great late night snack.)

The girls wanted to know how Batman was able to spell out HELP when he doesn't actually have superpowers.  Could they be a little less analytical, please? (No, the table's not dirty, just beat up.  Yes, I need to replace it.)

Anyway, I was driving the twins and their friend to an event last week, and they were showing the friend our Batman pictures (and one of TT posing with Satan while in New Orleans, and one of PS pretending to cut her dad's head off  with a saw at the Christmas Tree far) and the friend said, your family is...interesting. 

I think she meant it as a compliment.  At least, that's how I'm going to take it.

Ice Day

We don't get snow days around here, we get ice days.  It was 80 here on Wednesday--we've seen a 50 degree drop in 24 hours--crazy!

There's little accumulation on the ground, but what's there is solid ice.  My tree is one giant icicle and my neighbors crepe myrtles are now hanging all the way into my yard, over the 6 foot fence, and onto my rose bushes--I hope it is only the weight of the ice and that the branches haven't broken.

The city is completely shut down.  Schools were cancelled yesterday before a drop of freezing rain ever hit the ground.  I wonder what our ancestors would have thought about our ability to predict the weather future? Doppler radar sure would have been handy in pioneer times.  I bet the Donner Party would have appreciated it (too soon?).

Courts, city offices, the twin's girl scout campout, and every holiday event scheduled for the weekend has been cancelled.  Except The Marathon.  The Marathon is the biggest running event in this region. The weather is generally pretty crappy for it, but if you have ever met a marathoner, you know they are all slightly crazy and will run in just about anything--especially when they have been preparing for a year or more.

DH is supposed to be running a relay leg.  He is not a crazy marathoner determined to accomplish the goal he has been preparing for all year.  He is a casual 5Ker who got roped into the relay because his company is a race sponsor. If it were only him, he would back out, but he has an entire team to consider (they are called 4 Girls and DH).

Meanwhile, he is in New Hampshire, which is quite a bit warmer than where we are, which should never, ever be colder than New Hampshire.

Anyway, I'll happily take the ice day.  I am  happily ensconced in my warm and cozy house with my girlies.  I had to foresight (thanks to that handy doppler radar)  to pick up provisions to keep up fed through the weekend, and a box of fake logs to supplement our meager firewood in case we lose power. (We already lost power yesterday, before the storms  came in,which is particularly puzzling since the power lines are underground here.)

I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that DH's flight home tomorrow doesn't get cancelled. If it does, I guess he definitely won't be running in the marathon, and I'm sure as heck not filling in for him!

Back From Our Week in NOLA

We left a day earlier than we had planned, trying to get ahead of a predicted-to-be nasty winter storm. Unfortunately, the storm just followed us, and the weather was cold and rainy and a bit of a buzzkill, since most of what we wanted to do involved outdoor activities. (Yeah, you Northerners can laugh at us!)

Monday we explored the shops and art galleries in the French Quarter until the mist turned to rain, and then we bailed in favor of nap time at the hotel, rounding out our day by going to see Catching Fire (a much better adaptation than the Hunger Games).

Tuesday the weather was even nastier, so we headed to the aquarium.  We have a fantastic aquarium in our own backyard, and the Audubon Aquarium didn't quite measure up, but the twins enjoyed it. Buying a membership was the best financial choice for our family of five, so the twins and I followed up the aquarium with the insectarium (DH couldn't get in because it inexplicably had security and DH had a pocket knife, but he wasn't very interested anyway.) The Insectarium was unimpressive.  Most of the exhibits were artificial--few live specimens.

By Wednesday the rain was gone, but it was still cold.  We hit the zoo, and spent a lot of time in the heated reptile building.  The zoo was the best of the Audubon trio, although many of the exhibits were closed because of the cold or renovations. But the more cold-tolerant animals were more active than we typically see in more temperate weather. It warmed up by afternoon, so we did a scavenger hunt tour of the garden district from the Stray Boots app.  The tour was worth the modest cost of the app, and the kids enjoyed it.  That evening DH and I headed out to the swanky Irvin Mayfield's Jazz Playhouse, for some really good music and decent, interesting drinks.  I had a cucumber, basil margarita, which would have been really good if they had not added soda water.  I can't do bubbles in my alcohol. We hadn't intended to leave the kids alone this trip, but our hotel felt really safe and they were totally cool with it.

Thursday, of course, our options were limited, but the weather was much nicer.  We watched the Macy's parade from our hotel before heading out to lunch (did anybody catch the 5 seconds of robots that started the parade?  PS's team competed against two of them.) We hit the French Quarter after lunch and it was busier than we had seen it all week. It was really the first time we saw street performers.  We also caught the Bayou Classic parade, watching from Jackson Square with beignets and cafe au laits.  The girls had great fun catching beads.  That evening we finally made it to Preservation Hall.  We had wanted to do this earlier in the week, but were put off by the though of standing outside in the cold.  It was sooooooo good.  Absolutely blew the music from the previous night out of the water.  I was disappointed it was our last night, because I would have gone back.

We were headed back home Friday, but we headed back out the the French Quarter for a couple of hours so the girls could pick up some things they had scoped out earlier in the week.  The weather was beautiful and the Quarter was much more active.  We found Royal to be our favorite street in the Quarter--only a block over from Bourbon, but a totally different vibe--loaded with art galleries and fun shops. PS's dream job is to be a Pixar animator, and she was thrilled to find a gallery with original works by Tim Burton.

Overall it was a good trip, but we definitely missed out on some things because of the weather.  We had intended to do a ghost tour, but nobody wanted to be out at night in the cold.  And we wanted to spend some time exploring Magazine Street.  We're already thinking that a warmer weather trip is a must.

I'm Still Standin'

This fall has been challenging.  With the twins now in middle school, we are busier than ever.  We are lucky if we get one weeknight in any given week that is unscheduled.

And work has picked up a lot.  It is good news, because we have been really slow for a long time.  But the frenetic business is draining.  And I remain the only full time associate supporting 5 partners (not to mention my own growing book of business). While I have been able to do whatever they need for a very long time, I have lately been turning down work because I am completely maxed out.  I am frustrated by not having any support for my own cases or someone that I can hand work off to at this stage in my career. Such is the life in a small firm, I guess.

And the asshole ratio for opposing counsel has increased substantially in the last few months. I have always loved my job, but dealing with so many pricks lately is making me rethink my line of work. I am feeling very burned out lately, and  it does not help that I rarely get a moment of down time.

But... I took off this coming week. The kids are out of school all week and it's our only chance to take a vacation until summer (and we did not get more than a long weekend last summer).  Honestly, I would be perfectly happy chilling out at home all week.  What I really need is a slow down. I love traveling, but I just can't generate a lot of enthusiasm for this trip.  I don't even have our days planned, which is totally contrary to my control freak personality.  (Gee, once I read what I have written so far, this sounds like textbook depression.  Hmmmmmm.)

Anyway, we're headed to New Orleans tomorrow.  We've stopped while passing through on trips elsewhere, but we have never spent more than a few hours there.  We love what we've seen in our short visits, and wanted to spend more time exploring the city.  (Of course, I've received more than a few inquisitions-"You're taking your kids to New Orleans?  For Thanksgiving?!?") Yes, yes I am exposing my children to new food and music and art and culture.  You might try it sometime, Judgy McJudgersons.

So, yay, vacay!  And I'm sure we'll have fun once we're there, even if I'm being rather grumpy right at this moment. Worst case, there will be plenty of booze and beignets.

The Geek Squad

So yeah, haven't been around much lately. My downtime is minimal now that school is back in full swing.  The kids are out of school today and I have a late-morning court appearance, which has granted me a rare bit of free time in the morning.  I think that it what I miss most about summer--having an hour or so in the mornings to take care of a few things and catch up on my reader.  Now I have to hit the ground running, and the days are long.

DH bought the girls tickets to a Comic Con event on Friday.  He did this last weekend, essentially giving us one week to pull together costumes. (PS said "if you don't dress up for Comic Con, you just look like an idiot.") And I worked all weekend because we were on standby for trial this week (which, of course, didn't go). So it has been a bit of a challenge to pull this off, but we're doing ok.

PS may be the world's first non-slutty Poison Ivy.  Late Saturday night we hit Wal-Mart (my least favorite place in the world, but with our time constraints, options were limited) in search of something I could hack into a Poison Ivy costume.  We found a size 2XL green sundress on clearance for $5, and I managed to cut it down to a size 5. I am no seamstress, so fortunately my crappy seams are hidden by the 10 million leaves we have glued to it. So far so good.

But then my kid who never wears any makeup decided that she must do Poison Ivy makeup.  So I bought some green eye makeup and she dug up a tube of  bright red lipstick.  Holy crap, my 15 year old just morphed into a 21 year old!  Thank goodness her dad is going with her. And that we managed to create a modest Poison Ivy outfit.

We are making a Tardis tutu costume for SS, complete with a light-up hat. I haven't seen the whole outfit together yet, so I'm anxious to see how it looks. Meanwhile, I have sadly learned the intricate details of the Tardis.

And TT will be the 11th doctor. Her costume was definitely the easiest.  Fortunately, I have a suit jacket that will work well enough, so she just needed a few accessories. Although there was a brief moment of panic when we didn't know if I had ordered the 10th doctor's sonic screwdriver or the 11th doctor's sonic screwdriver.  God, mom! How did I not know there were different sonic screwdrivers?  Oh yeah, I don't watch Doctor Who.

How many oceans are there?

Can you answer without googling?  I asked at least 5 people that question today, all with graduate degrees, and all answered 7.  That is wrong.

Apparently the answer isn't 4, either. Although it was when I grew up.  We had the Arctic, Indian, Atlantic and Pacific oceans.  But wait...in 2000 the powers that be (who exactly gets to decide these things?)  decided there should be another ocean.  So now we have 5 oceans (or one ocean divided into 5 zones), the fifth being the Southern Ocean.

WTF?  Why have I not head about this before now? And how the hell do you just get to up and create a new ocean?  Is this to make up for the deplanetization of Pluto? Because it's not the same, dudes, and Pluto will always be a planet in my heart. 

The Sad, Sad End of Summer

We made it through the first week of school, and were quite happy to have a 3-day weekend to recover from it.  It is going to be a very busy year.

SS's days were particularly long because of volleyball tryouts. She made the "B" team, and we were thrilled.  Volleyball is extremely popular here and many girls play competitive club ball.  There were twice as many girls trying out as there were spots.  If you haven't been playing, you didn't have a chance in heck of making a team.  The sad reality of modern America is that if you haven't picked a sport by the time you're 10, you have virtually no chance of playing once you're in middle school and high school. It seems awfully young to have to have you're life figured out. 

We're already booked for every night this week, and our entire fall is quickly filling.  I've always been careful not to over-schedule the kids, but I feel like we are pushing our limits this year.  Part of it is that the kids are simply getting older and having more school-related activities.  Volleyball practice is now everyday instead of once a week.  And we have choir and band. PS still has robotics and SS is planning to get involved with the team at her school.  And now we have added fencing to our schedules--something that we could get rid of, but those of us who are doing it don't really have another regular physical activity.

One big question mark is Girl Scouts.  There are conflicts with the regular meetings.  But the girls really like to go camping and do other special events with their friends--who I am sure all in the same position. Even last year, the regular meetings grew pretty few and far in between. The girls had also been going to church on Wednesday nights (which is really just a church-sanctioned rave where all their friends hang out), but already had to skip last week so that they could get their homework done. 

And, of course, the workload has substantially increased.  All three are taking pre-AP courses in their core classes (PS is actually taking her first AP class), and their teachers are making it clear that they won't be slacking this year.  All three are scrambling tonight to complete projects that were assigned over the weekend.  And we just realized that they all need glue and we can't find a single non-dried out bottle in the house.  When I was buying school supplies, it didn't occur to me that my middle and high school students would need school glue.

Hopefully we can hang on with our overly-busy life.  But I guess if it gets to be too much, we'll have to start making cuts.

Terrible Timing Is...

Getting your first period on the first day of middle school. 

Minor Update

Thanks to all who left comments on my last post.  Your tips and experiences are really helpful.

I nearly lost it with the doctor's office on Friday because I couldn't get a call back.  And when I finally talked to a real person, it was a nurse who could answer none of my questions.  We will definitely be changing doctors.  In the meantime, I spent a good part of my day tracking down a pediatric endocrinologist.  Even in a big city, they are not easy to come by, most of them wouldn't make an appointment without a referral, and the earliest appointments are months away. But eventually, I found a specialist, made an appointment for late October--the earliest I could get in with anybody, and directed my doctor to make the referral to specialist and send over PS's records.  It was all far more difficult than it needed to be, if the primary care physician would have done his freaking job.

I know in the great world of terrible diseases, this one is not so bad. It just sucks to have a chronic illness diagnosis at 14.  And my bigger concern is her risk of related illnesses--so I want as much information as possible so that we can do whatever we need to prevent or minimize future problems.

Between this and other issues this week has been really shitty.  I'm feeling like I must have really pissed off karma. I just want to crawl in bed and  hide under my covers and wish all the bad stuff away. Unfortunately, that doesn't really work for grown-ups.

Not Cool

I took PS to the doctor yesterday. Mostly just a well-child check.  To go ahead and start the HPV vaccine. And because she had been complaining a lot about being tired and having headaches.  I didn't know if it was normal teenagerness or something else. So it seemed like a good time for a checkup.

Her vitamin D is low.  And so is her thyroid. Unfortunately, I learned all of this via a voice message because I was stuck in meetings all afternoon. The doctor never returned my call back.  I'm not happy that this news was delivered via a voicemail with no call back. I have a lot of questions. 

But my cautious googling has me a bit freaked out.  PS will likely have to take thyroid meds for the rest of her life The meds contribute to low bone density--already a risk for her. If it's not treated, her children could have birth defects.  And she could develop a goiter.  And hypothyroidism is associated with rheumatoid arthritis--what my mother has and the thing I am most terrified of inheriting from her.  But I am even more terrified of my children inheriting that ailment.

I had better talk to the doc tomorrow.  I will insist on a referral to a pediatric endocrinologist. I  need to know what is causing this--and if there is anything else going on. Honestly, I don't trust my doc to do a thorough review.* I only recently started going to him, and he doesn't seem to be particularly detail-oriented, although he's happy to give out meds.  He doesn't have a family history--so he doesn't know that her grandmother who died from cancer also had thyroid issues, and that her other grandmother has multiple autoimmune diseases (the most common cause of hypothyroidism is autoimmune disease). I need someone who wants to figure out the whole picture and not just a quick fix to an immediate problem.

In happier news, we found out that SS made the select choir in middle school. This is somewhat hilarious, since she absolutely will not sing in front of us.  So I had no idea what her chances were.  But apparently the kid can sing.



*Yes, I know this means I should look elsewhere. I just changed from a doc who wouldn't listen to me and would give me meds for anything, so it was a welcome relief to actually receive treatment for real ailments. Finding a good doc is not an easy thing.

Ouside My Comfort Zone

We had our first fencing tournament yesterday.  It was an in-house tournament, so not super formal and there were only familiar faces around, but it was sanctioned. I didn't come in last!

PS, TT and I have only been fencing for about 6 weeks, so none of us had great expectations.  We are the newest in our club by quite a bit,  and several of the others have competed nationally. 

Doing this really is outside my comfort zone. For one thing, it seems most people don't suddenly pick up fencing at the ripe old age of 38. There are a few adults in our club, but most of them fenced when they were younger.  The vast majority of the club is teenagers. And most of their parents stay for our practices.  I have no idea what they think about the old lady hanging out with all the kids.  But I roll with it.  Who cares, right?  At least I'm active and not sitting on the sidelines.

And I'm highly competitive (duh--like most type A lawyers).  But that makes it hard for me to stick with something that I'm not naturally good at.  I'm not naturally good at this (or anything that requires athleticism).  But it's fun.  And it's great time with my girls.  And it's more exercise than you would think (especially when our coach goes all Jillian Michaels in our drills).

So I'll keep working at it.  My goal in this tournament was to get at least 5 points (or touches) against my opponents.  I got 17.  And I won one bout! The kid I beat was only 13, but built like a linebacker and was an experienced fencer. And I scored some great points against the two girls who fought the final bout. (One of them said she was going easy on me at first, but I surprised her because I was better than she was anticipating.) At least I made them work a little for their wins, and they didn't steamroll me.  Overall, I am very happy with how I did.

PS and TT were in a younger pool going against two very experienced fencers.  They didn't place well, but a lot was due to the small pool and the stiff competition.  I think they will do fine in a larger pool and should be ready for a real tournament in the fall.

Life...it's busy

I've been burning the candle at both ends for a while now.  I doubled my typical monthly hours for July, knocked out the first draft of a national journal article, and wooed a new client. I'm on track for another very above-average month for August. I'm ready for some down-time, and I'm thrilled that this is my first unplanned weekend in more than a month.

Last weekend was my shopping weekend with the twins with a stay at a resort hotel.  The shopping was fun, and the pool at the hotel was awesome.  I think we may have to start an annual tradition. It was really fun to get some girlie time.

The weekend before that was my cousin's wedding.  The one my mother was able to attend, despite having to travel more than 350 miles.  Despite the fact that it was in a very old,  historic location with plenty of stairs and uneven brick pavement. But she couldn't make my brother's wedding, a mile from her house with no accessibility issues.

I did my best to keep the drama to a minimum.  My brother was angry enough that he didn't want to attend at all.  However, since I kept his daughter after his wedding, he had to travel here to retrieve her, and didn't really have an excuse not to attend.  We managed to avoid her until after the wedding.  But the bride wanted a photo with all of her family.  I was walking up to the group and apparently had my bitchface on while approaching my mother. 

She said, "are you mad?"

 I said "yes, I am. What you did to [Brother] is not ok." She was stunned.

My brother told my aunt he wouldn't be in the photo.  But the bride didn't know anything about the drama and said "wait, where's [Brother and New Wife]"  And someone else said, "yeah, where did they go?"  Obviously my family did not know about what had happened.  So I said, while smiling at the camera, "He's not here because HIS mother didn't bother to show up for HIS wedding."

Photo snapped, everyone disbursed. Other cousin high fived me "that was awesome." I apologized profusely to the mother of the bride (my aunt) for the drama that spilled over into cousin's wedding, and explain how hurt my brother was and how humiliating it was to explain over and over why his mother wasn't at his wedding.

We stayed on the opposite side of the room from my mother for the reception and left early (with the reasonable excuse that it was an hour's drive back to our house and we had the kids).

In other news, I took TT to the pediatric cardiologist for a checkup today, and she has outgrown her heart defect.  Yay!!!

TT, PS and I are still fencing.  TT decided to stick with it after all, and they are ahead of me because they've made a lot more classes than I.  I'm glad to have an activity I can do with them, and I'm glad they've both found a physical activity they enjoy.  I enjoy it too, but I'm frustrated with my slow progress.  I'll admit that I tend to not stick with things unless I'm good at them.  I'm not naturally good at this.  But hopefully I will get better. And the workout is a good thing, I can definitely feel my legs right now.

I've plateaued on the weight loss front, after losing about 25 pounds.  Mostly because I've been too busy to shop, plan, prepare and then log the foods I eat.  But at least I've made enough healthy lifestyle changes that I have maintained even while being super busy. Now that things have slowed down a bit, I'm trying to refocus so I can lose the last 7 pounds of my original target. Many of my clothes are too big, but I don't want to go shopping until I lose that last bit. I'm also annoyed that my belly doesn't seem to be shrinking.  My arms and shoulders are looking great (I think the fencing is helping), and my already skinny legs are getting skinner (I wish they wouldn't), but my stupid belly won't budge.  After stuffing two babies in there, nothing short of plastic  surgery may work, although I suppose I should at least try a good ab workout.

The girls go back to school in two weeks.  I'm in a bit of a funk, dreading the end of summer.  I hate the extra craziness that the school year brings, and I think it will only be worse with the twins in middle school and participating in athletics and choir and band and theater.

Week in Review

The last week didn't proceed at the frenetic pace of the previous three, mostly because our temporary injunction hearing was pushed back to this coming week, but it was still pretty darn busy. I am not complaining.  We have been so slow for so long that busy is good.

The twins turned 12 on Wednesday.  How is that possible?  My sweet babies aren't babies anymore.  Since they had a big end of school party, we kept their birthday low key.  My niece was here, and they invited another friend to their favorite burger joint and then back to our house for cupcakes and to watch Teen Beach Movie.

Our big gift to them is a shopping weekend with mom in which we stay at a fancy resort hotel near a huge mall to do their back-to-school shopping.  That will be next weekend, since their mid-week birthday was flanked by family weddings on the weekends. I'm excited about out our girlie time.

So, we brought my youngest niece, who is 10, back with us after my brother's wedding.  OMG, she is so funny.  She is so precocious and has a fantastic sarcastic sense of humor (much like mine, but much more fantastic on a 10 year old) that belies her years. My brother is coming in today for our cousin's wedding, and to retrieve his kid. He says my mother will be here.

So, she can make it 350 miles to her niece's wedding, but not 1 mile (literally!) to her son's wedding. I do not want to make a scene at my cousin's wedding, but if she speaks to me it will get ugly fast. I have nothing nice to say. She is the most selfish, narcissistic person I have ever met and apparently put not a moment's thought into how humiliating it would be for a groom to explain over and over why his mother wasn't at his wedding. Fortunately, a lot of people assumed that our stepmother was his mom. She was a bit bothered by this (she didn't marry my dad until we were adults, so she never had a "mom" role with us),  but I told her, "Hey, you're here.  That's enough."

DH and PS are at an out-of-town robotics competition, so it is just me and the three girlies (yesterday we were out and a sales girl said "Wow, they must all be your mini me's because they all look just like you." My niece found this hilarious.  She said, "I fit in more with your family than my own." Her sisters are all clear-skinned blondes and we are all freckled brunettes.) I think we will go to the arboretum this morning before getting ready for tonight's wedding.  Everybody wants their hair curled, so it will take a while!

Furious

My brother's wedding was tonight. My mother did not show up.  I am so freaking pissed. Who the fuck doesn't show for her own child's wedding. My brother was incredibly hurt. This may actually top all of her previously crappy behavior. 

In other news, life has been insane.  A client got smacked with a TRO and basically two years worth of discovery has been expedited into two weeks in preparation for the injunction hearing. I think the shortest day I've worked in the last two weeks is 12 hours. I am exhausted. 

I was supposed to have today off for the above mentioned wedding.  But my firm wanted me to handle a deposition today (the opposing expert and key witness!) and offered to fly me  out for the wedding. (A pretty awesome compliment.)

So this morning DH and the kids dropped me off at my depo and hit the road for Hometown. I followed by plane a few hours later. And did I mention that it's DH's birthday? So he was stuck on a long road trip for my brother's wedding while I get to fly in.  And then the wedding. And then driving my grandparents home. I have to say he's been pretty freaking awesome today and I owe him big time.

Happy Independence Day!

Thank FSM today is a holiday! The last week and a half has been insane.  We have been so slow for so long, and then, suddenly, there is a shitstorm in every case. I gave birth to a summary judgment response late yesterday, and by the time I finally got home I just sat on my sofa drinking wine with the cat curled up on my chest, unable to do anything else. (Isn't that really what a major brief is like--giving birth?)

But guess what else I did this week? I started fencing classes with PS and TT! The classes are at the sports complex where SS has volleyball, and I've been trying to talk TT into it for a while (mostly because I wanted to do it).  Then PS heard about it and she thought fencing sounded like great fun. (She's been working on a novel for which she has recently been doing research on swords and sword fighting, and it is not bad.  It needs a bit of polish, but she writes better than most adults.) And so we all went together for the introductory lesson.

PS and I quite enjoyed it, although TT thought it was rather boring. Most of the team was at a competition, so we got a lot of attention from the few who were there. And my fears about being too old to take up a new sport were quickly quelled. Our instructor had to be somewhere near 80.

The girls went back last night, while I, sadly, was still at work.  I don't know if TT will stick with it, but I want her to give it a few more tries before giving up. And I am happy to find something that at least PS and I can do together. She's a bit of a renaissance woman with her robotics, and web designing and art and writing, but she needed a physical activity. I think fencing fits perfectly, and all the better if its something she can do with her mom.  If TT continues, it will be a double score!

Alone--Day 2

So what have I done with all that free time?

I spent a good hunk of yesterday morning updating my Goodreads account and scouring the interwebs for book recommendations. I've had the Goodreads account for a few years now, but I never really did anything with it after initially setting it up.

And then I realized that it probably had mobile apps (it does), and that I had just solved 2 problems: 1) wandering around the bookstore or library looking for something to read; and 2) not remembering what I've read and what I haven't (I have seriously gotten several chapters into a book before realizing that I had read it before.  I do this with movies, too.  My memory is awful.)

Now I have a list of to-reads and a partial list of already-reads on my phone.  Woot!

I decided that I wanted a Gillian Flynn novel for my weekend page-turner.  I really liked Gone Girl, and I was hoping that she could deliver again.  So with my handy dandy Goodreads app installed, I headed out to Half Price Books, sadly the only bookstore in my town.

I love Half Price Books, but it it really better for treasure hunting than seeking out something specific.  I didn't find anything on my list, but I did bring home a half dozen books that I didn't really need (for the grand sum of $12).  I'm not sure a book lover ever really needs more books. I have at tons of unread books from  my previous treasure hunts already clogging my shelves. Not to mention a fairly well stocked nook.  And I visit the library almost every week.  But I can't resist more books.

My book collecting drives DH nuts.  There used to be stacks of books cluttered all around my night stand.  Then I got smart, and when we got a new bed a few months ago, I replaced the night stands with book cases.  Why had I never thought of that before?

None of my new books had the page-turner appeal I was seeking, so I ended up buying the novel I wanted on my nook.  That was a splurge, because I rarely pay full price for books.  It's a practice instilled long ago when I had few funds and a lot more time to read.  Which means that my nook doesn't get as much use as it could, since most of my reading material still comes from the library or used bookstore. (Although I have learned that around the holidays they tend to discount tons of books, and I stock up then.) I usually only buy a new book if it's something that I really want to read, or a favorite author.

So, by mid afternoon, I had my page-turner in hand.  I read for a while, watched an old movie (I love Doris Day!), a couple episodes of House of Cards, colored my hair, read some more. Today I went to the grocery store early and have a lazy afternoon of more reading planned. I could do a bit of house work. Or not.

I've enjoyed my quiet time, but I'm ready to have my people back.

Alone

DH and PS left yesterday for Hometown to attend his grandfather's funeral.  The twins and I were not able to go with them because they left for camp this morning and I needed to drop them off.  So now everybody is gone and I am alone until tomorrow afternoon when DH and PS return.

They were all concerned that I would be sad and lonely.  Let's see, 30ish hours in which I am responsible for nobody but myself?  Yeah, I can deal with that. That is the introvert's ideal state--at least every once in a while. I don't think I have been alone overnight in my own home since I was studying for the bar in 2007 and DH took the girls to Hometown over the July 4th holiday.

So, what to I do with this little nugget of time? I have no idea.  I kind of wish I had a page-turner, because I wouldn't mind a weekend ensconced in a really good book all weekend.  (I'm in  the middle of two books right now, but neither would qualify as a page-turner.)

I checked to see if The Great Gatsby was still showing, so that I could knock "seeing a movie by myself" off my bucket list, but sadly it is not. And I've used up all my discretionary funds shopping for the kids' summer clothes, so shopping is out (not that I really want to go shopping anyway).

Hmmm...

Craziest depo experience to date

I subpoenaed several nonparty fact witnesses for their depositions today.  My assistant called them all last week to let them know the  subpoenaes were coming and to consult with them regarding their schedules--basically trying to make it as easy as possible because nobody wants to be dragged into someone else's lawsuit.

So the last guy of the day shows up, along with a woman.  The both seem to be quite dressed up for a deposition.  She was in a very tiny dress with very tall heels.  He was in his black  Stetson and dress boots.

We were discussing whether the woman could sit in the deposition with him, and she said, "We're newlyweds!"

And I said, "Congratulations!  How long have you been married?"

And she said, "Like,  just now.  We just left the court house and all of our family is waiting for us at home."

Holy crap.  I totally subpoenaed and deposed some guy on his wedding day.

Of course, I never would have done that intentionally. We did talk to him before the subpoena went out and he never mentioned a wedding.  He said he kind of forgot the wedding and the deposition were on the same day. Wow.

Doctor Who???

So, this is our first summer without a nanny.  I've interspersed a few camps throughout the summer, but there's still plenty of downtime. My biggest concern is that they will become couch potatoes, because they have no way to get around and our neighborhood is surrounded by 55 mph highways and there's  no way I'm letting them cross those to walk anywhere.

 Apparently my fears were not unfounded. Today I learned that the twins watched SEVEN episodes of Dr. Who.  Seriously???

I figured this out because we cut the cable for the summer, so everything they watch comes through Netflix or Hulu.  At least I can monitor what they're watching.  And tell them to knock off the marathons or there will be no television at all.  But really, seven episodes?  I don't think they left the couch at all.

Random Tidbits From This Week

--So the esophageal manometry was as much fun as I anticipated.  But results were normal.  So yay for that.  I swallow like a regular person.

--TT got the Science Award at their end of year ceremony (One kid per grade gets an award for each of the core subjects.  PS also got the science award in 6th grade.) But last night we actually opened the envelopes full of their award certificates and saw SS's name on the science award.  So now we have no idea who actually was supposed to get the Science award.  And I can't call and ask because the science teacher mysteriously quit and the last few weeks were taught by a sub with no email address and no contract requiring her to put in days after the term ended.

--At her robotics banquet, PS got the Most Valuable Team Member award.  Pretty freaking awesome for a freshman.

--I took a potential client call at work this week.  I usually draw the short straw on taking these calls.  Nobody else wants to do it because 90% of them are people trying to get free legal advice. This guy lived in Oklahoma and had a dispute with someone in Oklahoma.  I am not  in Oklahoma.  I explained at least 5 times that we are not in Oklahoma and are not licensed to practice in Oklahoma and that he needed to contact an Oklahoma attorney.  Potential client  was getting progressively irritated, telling me that no one would listen to him about his case.  I said, "I understand your frustration, but you really need to be calling Oklahoma attorneys."  He insisted that I was the person to help him, despite not being in Oklahoma.  I asked a few questions and said, "based on what you have told me, there are jurisdictional issues that would required this case to be handled in Oklahoma--and I am not licensed to practice there." Then he yelled,"You just don't want to help anybody unless they've been run over by an 18-wheeler!" and hung up on me.  Yeah,  that's it.  Especially since I am NOT a personal injury attorney.







 

Not So Happy Day

I have to be at the hospital at 7:00 in the morning for esophageal manometry. This pretty much involves sticking a sensor-filled tube up my nose and down my throat to measure whether I swallow normally.  I am so not excited.

 I had a feeding tube once as part of the many unsuccessful attempts to treat my extreme hyperemesis when I was pregnant with the twins.  It was possibly the most miserable part of the whole experience.  Worse than the pic line or the central line and giving birth, vaginally, to twins, one with forceps and the other breech, about 10 minutes after my epidural was placed and well before it completely kicked in. So yeah, not looking forward to this.

The reason for all this is to confirm that I am a good candidate for surgery to treat my acid reflux. I'm also not happy about that.  I had my follow up with my doc last week.  I really expected her to tell me that I was golden and she would see me in a year.  My reflux is 1000 times better since she changed up my meds, and I lost all the weight she advised.*

But my reflux is only better because of the meds.  As soon as I scale back, it comes back. And the meds will continue to weaken my already thin bones.So here we are, looking at a miserable test and abdominal surgery.  I'm not old enough for this shit.

* So, the weight.  I have been sticking to the South Beach plan, as recommended by my GP. I have lost 19 pounds since my February post-holiday, PMS-bloat high, and  14 from where I normally hover.  I'm pretty much back to my pre law school weight.  All of my belts are too big now, my clothes fit better (and in some instances are really too big), and I can wear things that have been hiding in the back of my closet for years. I'm about 10 pounds from my target now.

And not one.single.person has noticed.  Seriously, nobody.  Not my secretary who always knows when I'm not feeling well, not my aunts who will never hesitate to tell me if I've put on 5 pounds.  Nobody.  I'm pretty private--I haven't advertised that I'm trying to drop a few pounds.  But you think someone would have noticed that the skirt I wore on Friday was about to fall off. It's a bit frustrating--good thing I'm changing my diet for better health rather than to make myself look better.

Economics

Our party was a smashing success.  We had 10 kids show up throughout the night, and they all seemed to have a good time.  No drama and no crying (which is always a possibility with a bunch of 12 year old girls--although we did throw in a few boys for good measure).

Whenever we have a party, I am always so appreciative of my kids, who seem so calm and chill compared to some of the others.  There are a few who make me wonder how their parents survive without a daily dose of Xanax and vodka (maybe they don't).

My girls have an interesting cross-section of friends. Most of the kids we knew fairly well, but there was one we hadn't met before.  Her mom asked if we could pick her up because her car wasn't running.  I agreed, assuming that she lived close by since she goes to school with the girls.  Nope.  She lives in the trailer park across town.  When DH went to get her, she was running with a pack of kids down the road, covered in mud because they had been digging in the creek for crawdads. 

She was in awe at the GPS and backup camera on our car and proclaimed us rich because we lived in a brick house. (I've mentioned before that when I was a kid I also thought anyone who lived in a brick house was rich.)  I guess compared to her we are rich.

The kid was precocious.  I figure she's got a 50/50 chance of becoming something great or becoming a criminal.

Meanwhile, PS went over to a friend's house to escape our madness.  She was self-conscious about inviting her friend over because her friend lives in a very, very nice home.  PS said our 2700 sq ft, 10-year old  house would look like a shack comparatively. PS may or may not have had lobster for dinner at friend's house (she's not sure). We just had burgers and hot dogs at our shack.

Seriously, it's all relative.  We are neither rich nor poor, and our cars and house do not reflect our finances as much as they reflect how we choose to spend our money. We purchased our house one a single income less than 1/3 our current combined income. Theoretically,using the 2.5 x income general rule of thumb, we could be in the very, very nice home, but I just can't imagine that kind of house payment with student loans still owing and three college educations in our future. Not to mention I'd like to leave my house every once in a while, and I'd far rather have discretionary funds for travel and entertainment than live in a McMansion.  But we could certainly take a step or two up without going for broke.

We've been tossing around putting our house on the market next spring, now that housing prices are finally going back up, but it's a hard choice.  I feel like it's college vs. nicer home, although it's really not that black and white. I guess we'll see what happens.

Summer!

Today is 6th Grade Graduation.  I think I will get teary.  I can't believe my babies are moving on the middle school.  We've had a kid in this elementary school for 9 years now.  It is a big transition.

SS is wearing a fabulous sparkly zebra-print dress with hot pink accents. We spent an hour this morning trying to coax curls into her stick-straight hair.  And, of course, it is raining.  But I put in enough hair spray to withstand a hurricane, so maybe the curls will make it through this morning's ceremony.

TT is wearing a short-sleeve plaid button down shirt with white capri jeans.  Pretty much the exact opposite of her sister.

We've planned an end-of-year party on Saturday.  They wanted a pool party, which sounds great except that we don't have a pool.  So we bought a ton of water guns and water balloons and DH and the girls have built obstacles (like in paint ball or laser tag) all over the yard so that they gan have water battles. 

They've invited 20 kids.  So far I have 2 RSVPs.  Their two closest friends will both be out of town.  Sigh.  I think it was a bad weekend, probably should have done it last weekend. We figured there would be several who couldn't make it, which is why I allowed 20 in the first place. I'm just crossing my fingers that more show who haven't RSVP'd

The good news: summer is here! I love summer.  The kids aren't so busy. I don't have to constantly nag them about school. We have more time together in the evenings.  I have more time in the mornings because I don't have to get all of them out the door and dropped off.  Yay for summer!

Stupid Not Yet Teenagers

For the second time in a month a teenager in our community has committed suicide. Of course, this has all parents on high alert because of the cluster effect.

So I was talking to my girls last night about suicide and bullying (which was a rumored cause in the first instance, but I don't know about the second) and all of the changes we could make if bullying or any other circumstance in their lives got so bad that they thought the only option was to take their own life.

And then SS and TT said, "oh yeah, something happened that we forgot to tell you about..."

Apparently, friend R was rubbing friend K's shoulders at recess.  Two Mean Girls surreptitiously filmed this with their camera phone and promptly uploaded it to Facebook with a title that said something like "Lesbian Love."

These kids are in 6th fucking grade. They aren't even old enough to be on FB! I am stunned and angry.  I asked if R and K had told their parents, and they had. Our school district has been running a huge anti-bullying initiative, but obviously all those lectures about about bullying and proper use of social media aren't getting through. 

I feel like we we need to do something--but I don't know what. I'm afraid it's going to be a long haul through middle school and high school.

Better Week

Finally got the car repaired by a second mechanic.  The problem was indeed the minor one that I had diagnosed via Google, rather than the $1400 problem that the first mechanic claimed.  Woot! (But the original mechanic will never get our business again.)

Then the a/c in the house started acting funny. The repairman told me it was the least expensive part that I could replace, although if I had let it go it probably have taken out the motor which would have been much more expensive.  That repair as $115, and I was doing a happy dance that it wasn't far more.

Yesterday the twins had a Girl Scout thing, so DH and I had a date day (PS was invited but turned us down). DH got free tickets to a  "Taste Of..." event, and even though I declared it a cheat day, I really didn't eat very much bad food. I did, however, have the most delicious peach bellini ever. Yum! A very pleasant surprise in a land of  unimpressive wine margaritas. And it was really nice to get some alone time with DH. 

We didn't stay too long at the festival, so we did a bit of shopping on the way home, since I was still searching for a gift for TT. We almost immediately found a Fossil Watch that seems perfect for her. It's not quite the more keep-forever piece I had been hoping for, but it is so much more her style than anything I had been looking at, and it is her first "grown up" watch or jewelry.

We were all back home by late afternoon, so that evening TT and I went shopping for dress clothes.  It was not easy, although we did get her a cute summer outfit that is a bit nicer than her usual superhero T and soccer shorts. We were having no luck finding non-dress dressy clothing. But finally, in our fourth store she found a dress that she thought she might be able to live with, and with a bit of bribery, I talked her into it. Yay!

The dress came with a cute purple skinny belt. TT said, "I am NOT wearing a belt with a dress.  What's the point of that?  A belt is supposed to keep your pants up!" Indeed. Getting her into a dress was step one--I think it will be a while before we get to accessorizing. But her fashionista twin was happy to take the belt (and is now demanding her own shopping trip). Maybe we'll do out mani/pedi date today.

Girls and Nongirls

How did I end up with 3 girls, but only 1 who is actually girly? I'm glad that my girls all have their own identities, but the anti-girls make shopping hard.  When's the last time you had to find a dressy outfit for a tween with no pink, no ruffles, and no sparkles?  It's damn near impossible.

TT and SS have 6th grade graduation this year. (For the record, I don't equate this with a "real" graduation, but I do consider it a big turning point in my girls' lives.) Anyway, we are looking for nice outfits for their graduation and a couple of weddings that we will attend this summer.

TT is refusing to even consider a dress (she did say she would wear a suit, snort), and I'm having no luck finding anything appropriate that's not a dress and that meets the no-sparkle-ruffle-pink rule.  Grumble. It doesn't make it any easier that they are stuck in tween wasteland, between kids' and juniors' sizes.

I also want to give each of them each a moderate piece of jewelery--just as a symbol of transitioning from a kid to a teen.  I gave PS an amethyst necklace.  I will start SS a silver charm bracelet.  I'm clueless as to what to do for TT. I'm thinking maybe a plain silver locket engraved with her initials--but I'm still not sure it's her style.

SS was easy.  She's my girly-girl.  We ordered a sparkly zebra-print dress with hot pink accents. Of course, SS comes with her own girlie issues. Earlier this week, on a busy morning, a caught only a flash of SS as I dropped her off for school.  And  in that flash I  saw nothing but an excess of green eye shadow, bright pink lipgloss, and hot pink hair feathers. As she leapt from the car, I shouted "Are you wearing makeup?"  She either didn't hear me or chose to ignore me.  The teacher manning the carpool lane, however, was cracking up.

I don't really care if SS starts wearing makeup--she'll be in middle school next year, and I was wearing makeup at her age.  But I do expect it to be tastefully applied and for my little girl to still look like a little girl.  And apparently she caught some flack from the other girls at school about her eyebrow-high green eyeshadow.

So that night we went through her makeup, and I told her what  was ok for school (pastel eyeshadows only, a bit of pink blush, the tiniest touch of mascara) and gave her a makeup lesson.  She said "but you can't tell I'm wearing anything!" And I said, "that's the point. Makeup is only supposed to enhance your natural beauty, not make you look like someone else."  And so I pulled in her non-makeup wearing identical twin and stood them side-by-side in front of the mirror.  Then she could see the difference and was ok with the minimal makeup. (That twin thing is handy sometimes.)

And then there's PS, who also hates dresses, and who learned that there is to be a robotics banquet. So, we presumed that she will need a dress or other appropriately dressy outfit.  She's in to a Victorian-Gothic style found only in the pages of her favorite Manga, and her dream dress would involve black lace and a corset.  Ummm, no. But I did find a black lace party dress on sale at Macy's for $17 that looks adorable on her and she actually approved. 

And then we learned that the "banquet" won't be dressy.  I'm disappointed.  I was so looking forward to PS in a dress, and the puzzled looks she would receive from the robo boys, who are used to seeing her in converse and protective eye wear. It will be like Hermione at the Yule Ball.Oh well, we're keeping the dress--it was a steal.  With three girls it will surely come in useful at some point. Maybe.

Happy Mother's Day

I hope all my fellow MILP's are treated well by your loved ones and rugrats.

DH and the girlies borrowed from his Father's Day gift last year and gave me a date with each of the girls.  I get Fro Yo and mani/pedi's with SS, lunch and bowling with TT, and dinner and the theater with PS.  Perfect.

They are also going to put in some rose bushes this afternoon. We were planning on buying patio furniture, too,  but that is delayed until after we see the bill for DH's car repair.

The week from hell definitely got better by the weekend.  I finally got around to cleaning out my closet, which was something of a disaster.  And in the process, I started trying on clothes that hadn't fit in a while.  Three pair of pants that I haven't worn in years fit now!  Woo hoo!  A couple of other thing are a bit tight, but should be perfect in another 5 pounds (and let me just say that there is a big difference in an Ann Taylor size 10 from a few years ago vs. a recent size 10.  My size wasn't changing, but my butt was definitely getting bigger.)

This South Beach thing seemed specious--especially the initial zero-carb phase, but it really does seem to be working.  I am not starving like I've been on every other diet I have ever tried--and I'm much happier now that I have added back fruit and whole-grain carbs. I've also been tracking my foods, even though it's not required, because I was worried about what a high-protein diet would do to my cholesterol.  My cholesterol numbers are fine as long as I stick to egg whites instead of whole eggs, and I find that I'm nearly always under my calorie allotment without even trying. Right now I'm on track to be at my goal weight before the two family weddings this summer. Yay!

Week From Hell

Monday:

TT is sick.  I go into the office late and leave early so she's not home by herself all day and because I am starting to feel crappy.  The day gets worse as it goes along.

DH's car starts smoking on the way home.  He can't identify the source, it stops, he makes it home ok.

Tuesday:

I'm sick, so DH takes my car and drops the girls off at school. In the afternoon PS misses the bus for a robotics meeting, so I head out to pick her up.  But DH's car is dead.  The key fob doesn't even work. She has to bum a ride home. But she doesn't know how to give directions to our house and leads her good Samaritan in circles around the neighborhood. Oh boy.

DH gets home, charges the battery and all seems well.  I think this must have something to do with the smoking incident.  He thinks there was just a loose battery cable and it is a coincidence.

Wednesday:

PS isn't feeling well, but has major tests that the school has warned them not to miss absent exceptional circumstances.

 DH's car is dead again. We decide to drop it off at the shop and carpool.  We are standing in the backyard while the car is charging and hear a pop and a hiss.  When we go running to the driveway we see steam coming from under the car.  It stops and the car seems drivable, so I follow him to the shop, less than a mile away.

DH's drops me off at work and heads to the office in our only working car.

The shop calls three times and can't figure out the problem.We tell them to keep trying. I start googling, and figure out what appears to be a remarkably inexpensive solution that exactly matches our symptoms.  We call the shop and they say, no, it's this related problem that will cost $1,400.  I have no faith in the shop at this point.  We ask them to implement our solution for now.  If it doesn't work, we will seek a second opinion.

PS calls after finishing her test asking us to pick her up.  DH leaves to get her.  He isn't feeling well either.  I bum a ride home from a co-worker who lives in the 'burbs near me.

We go get DH's car after I get home.  All seems well.

PS starts vomiting overnight.

Thursday:

DH is flying to Chicago for a job interview.* His flight is at 7:55, which is seriously problematic if his car isn't fixed and I have to drop him off and get back home in time to get all the kids to school. He wakes me at 4:45 to tell me his car won't start and I will need to drop him off (a cab ride from the 'burbs to the airport would probably be $100+--not a luxury we can afford if we are staring down a $1400 car repair).

He is feeling miserable and starts puking.  Pulls it together and decides to go forward with the trip. (Apologies to anyone he might have infected along the way. Yes, we do generally try to keep our infectious diseases to ourselves.)

I drop him off at 6:30, head back home, grab the girls, drop them off (minus PS) by 8:00, back home to shower, and make it to work by 9:30, feeling like I've already put in a full day.

Leave work at 4:45 because SS has volleyball practice at 6:00 and traffic is miserable because it rained today.  SS jumps in the car as I roll by, and she makes it to vb with 4 minutes to spare.

Pick her up again at 7:00 and run through a drive-through for dinner.

DH texts to say that the interview went well and he didn't puke on anybody. He's on his way back now, and I have to pick him up at 11:00 (which is past my bedtime, yes, I'm old).  Thank god the kids are old enough to leave alone now.

I'm scared to see what Friday will bring. 

*This is for a telecommuting position, so sadly, we will not have the opportunity to live in Chicago.  However, the opportunity to work from home is huge.  DH's commute is 30 miles and 1-1.5 hours each way in city traffic.  He would effectively regain at least 2 hours of his life back every single day.  And we would have someone nearby for the kids, which has been a major concern with us both working so far away and especially since we no longer have a nanny. Also, one of is is having to leave work early at least once or twice a week to get the kids to a meeting or practice--this will be a major help with that.

I do worry about him becoming socially isolated, though.  Right now he has his work buddies that he goes to the gym and to lunch with.  Living with 4 women, he needs some guy time.  And we gave up our office  last summer so that TT could have her own room. We're not sure where he will work if this all goes through.

And he really loves his current job.  The only negative is the horrific commute.  It's hard to leave a job you love, but we've been talking for a long time about one of us needing to be closer to the kids, and he has the most flexibility for this.  The only law I could practice out here is family law and petty crimes, and I have no interest in either.

So, fingers crossed that the job goes through and works out well for him. And that this week doesn't get any worse.

Sick Day

The girlies have been passing around a stomach bug since we got back from St. Louis, and it finally landed on me.  I was feeling queasy and left work early yesterday after handing in my part of a brief that we were filing that day, and thank goodness I did because I was in sad shape by late afternoon.

I awoke this morning, unsure of how I felt, but hopped in the shower hoping to wash away the sickness and head in for a 9:00 am  client meeting.  By the time I got out of the shower I managed to convince myself that I didn't need to go into the office or spread my germs to our out-of-town client, so I texted Big Boss to share the happy news.

I snoozed throughout the morning and finally managed some hot tea and crackers, which perked me up a bit. I never take a sick day, and I'm feeling a bit guilty about being home now that I'm starting to feel better.  I really need to get over this work guilt thing. Especially since I really don't have anything pressing to deal with.

I've spent my day watching a Who's the Boss marathon that's been saved on my DVR.  That show is my comfort food. DH makes fun of me for watching it, but I don't care.  I totally wanted to go live with Tony and Angela when I was a kid, and I love seeing all the retro reminders.

I'm also planning an end of the year party for SS and TT.  This is their last year of elementary school, and I think that's worthy of a party--especially since many of the kids they've gone to school with for the past 7 years will be moving away or going to a different middle school.  But, really, any excuse for a party.  I LOVE party planning.  So I've spent a big chunk of my day searching out party ideas.  Whatever did we do before Pinterest?

I don't know when I've spent so much time lying around.  I almost miss work. I'm definitely stir crazy, but since I'm concerned I'm still infectious I guess I'll keep my germs at home to myself.

Stupid Teenagers

I am sad, and cranky and irritated for PS. She was texting several of her friends yesterday, trying to find someone to go see a theater production at the high school with her this weekend. She was bummed that no one seemed to be available.  And then one of them let it slip that they were all going to Six Flags. But no one invited her.

It wouldn't be a big deal if it were a one-off, but it happens a lot.  PS invites her friends for things, and often they are able to go. But no one ever invites her.  I don't think it's because she's "that annoying kid." For one thing, PS is very low key. But also because they don't always turn her down when she invites.  She gets invited to parties where there are bigger groups, and she hangs out with them at school.

A couple of weeks ago we ran into a group of them at the library, where they had prearranged to meet (there aren't many options in our town). They seemed genuinely excited to see her, and then invited her along to walk to a nearby ice cream shop.  So I don't think it's that they don't like PS--they just don't seem to ever think about PS unless she's standing in front of them.  Sigh.

She also has her robotics group of friends, but they are all boys. It's about a 5-1 male/female ratio, and every one of the girls has a boyfriend (sadly, I think most of the girls are only doing it because of their boyfriends).  The robo boys aren't into the artsier things that PS is. And she already spends a lot of time with them, and I'm not going to let her hang out with a group of all boys all the time (especially because one of them seems like he might be more than just a friend.)  She needs girlfriends to hang out with.

I know her feelings were hurt by the Six Flags snub. I wish I could make it better. On he bright side, she actually hung out and chatted with DH and me last night, and that NEVER happens.