Whirlwind Weekend

We are finally back home after spending the last three days in St. Louis for the robotics championships.  It was a quick busy trip, and we are pooped, but so happy we went.  PS left at 1:00 am Wednesday morning, and we followed after picking up TT and SS from school on Wednesday afternoon.

The Hotel

This is the TripAdvisor review I wish I could write.  We stayed in one of the swankier hotels in St. Louis, only because DH works for a REIT that happens to own the hotel and we got a fantastic rate. (Thus the reason I can't actually publicly post a review.) Anyway, to get the great rate, DH had to email someone in the hotel's management office and let him know exactly what we needed.  I saw the email--it said two adults and two kids.

When we arrived at 1:00 am Thursday morning,  we were given a king suite with a pull-out sofa.  Except that there was no room to actually fold out the sofa due to a massive piece of furniture sitting opposite the sofa. They said. "oh, we only had one person on the reservation."  And you didn't see 4 of us walk in? After much discussion, we were upgraded to a larger king suite on the club floor.  Yay! But by the time we finally got to bed it was 2:00 am.  Not a great start to our stay.

We were up early the next day and headed out to the robotics competition--not fully recovered from the long journey and late night.  It was after 9 when we got back to our hotel Friday night and we promptly showered and crashed.  And then, at 10:45, I was awakened from a dead sleep by music so loud that it was literally shaking the windows in our room and I could hear every word of every song ("Last Dance with Mary Jane," "Sweet Home Alabama"...) We called the front desk and we're told, "we'll see what we can do, there's a prom going on two floors above you." WTF? Obviously Swanky Hotel regularly hosts similar events.  Are they usually loud enough to shake the windows of their club level guests? I can't imagine.  Ambient noise I could have tolerated, but this was so loud it could have been right next door.  Fortunately, they shut it down within about half an hour.  I got the impression we weren't the only ones complaining.

And then last night, about 11:30 there was some crazy noise like a giant chain being dragged across the roof that, again, awakened us.  Even the kids heard that one. Fortunately it was short lived. All of this was annoying for us.  I would have been livid if I had paid the rack rate (nearly $300/night). Unacceptable for a hotel of the caliber it proclaims to be. 

The City

I'm kind of "eh" about St. Louis.  I didn't love it.  Traffic wasn't bad, but it has all these crazy loops and u-turns to get on and off the highways that made me feel like I was always driving in circles. 

We visited the Arch.  Knock that off the bucket list. Not that exciting.

We visited the City Museum.  That was exciting.  The kids decided it was the awesomest "museum" they have ever visited, and we practically had to drag them out of there. It's not really a museum. It's really a giant maze made up of enormous sculptures, architectural elements and industrial leftovers.  For instance, there is a giant "slinky" kids can climb through that is made from an old refrigeration coil from the Budweiser plant.  I really don't know how to describe this place, but for kids who like to climb and explore it is pretty freaking amazing.  One caveat is that I would have been a nervous wreck when my kids were smaller because there is really no way to keep up with them.  At age 11--and having two of them--I felt pretty comfortable letting them explore on their own with specified meeting times.

We also visited Fitz's Rootbeer, a restaurant in an old bottling factory that still bottles while you watch.  The food was decent and it was fun.  It's on Delmar Street (I think) which was a nice little shopping district.  We found a cool book store and comic book store, and I bought the girls finger narwhals in a little giftshop.

OMG ROBOTS!

The robotics competition did not disappoint.  There were 400 teams competing at our level (FRC), plus who knows how many teams competing at lower levels (like lego robotics)  for younger kids. At FRC there were teams from Israel, the Netherlands, Australia and Canada (and those are just the ones I know about!)  Needless to say, there were a lot of kids there, and it's just one huge party.

On the first day PS texted us "I just met some Canadians that are in the Archimedes division who were super duper nice and gave me chocolate that's illegal in America because of a choking hazard.  Today has been cool!"

I let my daughter go off to a nerd convention, and she mixes with crazy Canadians who introduce her to illicit chocolate! They obviously know her drug of choice. She had a fantastic time--although I think we saw about 5 minutes of her the entire trip--she was always running, running, running. (We sat with several other team parents and when they found out who we belonged to, every single one said, "Oh, PS!  We love her!")

Their team did great at the competition.  We made it through the quarter finals and lost in the semifinals.*  Our team is very young in the robotics world and this was only the second trip to nations and the first time making the finals.  The goal was to make it to finals (and therefore help establish our cred in robot world), and they were thrilled to make it that extra step. Definitely a worthwhile trip!

*****

*Ok, if you really want to know how this works... Each team gets 8 qualification matches. During the qualification matches, the robots are randomly assigned to teams of 3 (your "alliance") and have 3 on 3 game play.  Your win/loss is based on the total points for your entire alliance--so much depends on the robots you are paired with and those you compete against--and teams are ranked individually by their win/loss record.

After all of the qualification matches, the top 8 teams are automatically in the finals.  But then each of the top 8 gets to pick the alliance that it wants to go to the finals with.  Often the top teams pair together, which opens up spots for the next highest ranked teams.  So 24 total robots go to finals, in alliances of 3.

We were ranked 19th, but were a first round pick by the #5 seed team.  It was seriously huge that we were picked so early. Of course, rankings don't tell the whole story because so much depends on how others perform, and I guess the #5 seed saw this.

After alliance selections, it goes to a double-elimination bracket system for finals. Since we were the 5th alliance we played the 4th alliance and won.  Then it was down to 4 teams and we played the #1 seed and lost.  The winner of the top 2 in our division went to the "Einstein Division" which was the top team from each division (since there are 400 teams, they were divided into 4 divisions), and the winner of our division made it to the very end and lost (to the Canadians, so PS was very happy for them!) Maybe there really is something to that chocolate!

Ch-ch-ch--ch-changes

My doctor has informed me that I need to go on the South Beach Diet.  Just got labs back and my triglycerides were way too high.  Yay.

Frankly, I would have been far happier if he had told me to go vegetarian.  I can live without meat, but oh, how I love my carbs.  I guess that's what got me into this situation in the first place.  Bread, pasta, rice, potatoes--I love it all.  I also love a cupcake as much as the next girl, but I have enough sense to keep the sweet stuff out of the house.  The pasta and potatoes are the real problem.

I would love to blow this off as a fluke, but  this was a retest with the same high-tri result.  Not to mention that both my dad and brother have diabetes, and there seems to be some connection between high-triglycerides and diabetes. Since I really do not want to go down that path, I guess we'll give this a whirl.

The first two weeks of South Beach require cold-turkey elimination of all carbs and sugar.  Supposedly this is supposed to regulate blood sugar and eliminate cravings. This is tough--especially since I'm not a big veggie eater. I've been searching for recipes without much luck. Half of what is out there is sweets made with artificial sweeteners.  This doesn't seem to comport with the goals of regulating blood sugar and reducing cravings, since multiple studies say that artificial sweeteners trigger the same cravings and blood sugar swings as real sugar. And I've been trying to move away from processed foods and more toward whole foods--artificial sweeteners are just another processed food.

I've had better luck just adapting my own recipes. So far it's not too bad--it just takes a lot of planning to make sure that I have the rights kind of food at work. But I'm glad this phase is short, because there is a lot of redundancy and there is no way it would work in the long term (and I don't even want to think about the havoc being wrecked on my cholesterol levels, with all the dairy, meat and cheese.)

Ugh!

TT texted me after school today that she had a note saying that her science teacher had resigned "for personal reasons." Of course this made me immediately suspicious.  Teachers are under contract--they don't just leave in the middle of the year unless something has happened. 

I told DH after I met this guy for the first time that he gave off a pedophile vibe.  Not very PC, but there was just something "off" about him. He was new to the school--the only sixth grade teacher that PS hadn't already had. Of course, there's not much you can do about an instinct.  Be vigilant. Limit out-of-class contact. Have the inappropriate touching talk--a lot.

So when I got TT's text, the first thing I did was google court records.  Nothing popped up, though. And then, within an hour, I had a text from the mom rumor mill saying that he had allegedly been touching girls' hair and the police had questioned him. 

Once I got home I tried to not-too-obviously question the twins.  TT said "he's creepy," which she had said before.  And then she told me that one of her friends had told her that he had rubbed her upper thigh when she went in for help after school.  I lectured her and SS on why they hadn't told me or another grown-up about that incident and I grilled them about whether he had ever touched them in a way that made them uncomfortable.  They swear he did not, and I believe them.  I don't think they have the personalities of typical targets, and they had already told me that they didn't really like him (and they love most of their teachers.)

Maybe I shouldn't give much credence to the rumor mills, but my gut instinct plus TT's story today lead me to believe there's some veracity there.  I just hope he was found out before it got any further than what we already know about.

Friday Fun

So I finally had my endoscopy.  I have esophageal ulcers and a smallish hiatal hernia. I feel so validated, finally having a diagnosis.  But apparently esophageal ulcers are somewhat rare and often caused by over-consumption of alcohol.  So now I'm afraid my docs will think I'm a lush.  Great, since I have a couple of drinks a couple of times a month and I've only been drunk enough for a hangover twice in my entire life.

So the doc is changing up my meds and there may be another invasive procedure and possibly surgery in the future.  Yay.

In other news, we've been busy, busy, busy, with spring sports now in full swing. We have a meeting or practice or event every night of the week.  I'm so ready for the summer slowdown. Last night we ended up with a rare family night together.  Usually the kids are going in three different directions. But PS has to see a live show for her theater class by next week and we were planning to go on Saturday while the twins were at a Girl Scout event, but the show was sold out on Saturday so she bailed on robotics on Friday and we all went together.

We we went to our favorite tiny theater to see a "popcorn-throwing melodrama."  We've taken PS before, but never SS and TT (sometimes the shows aren't kid appropriate), who thought any place where you get to throw popcorn and not get in trouble is pretty much the awesomest place ever. We were seated literally 1 foot from the stage and had great fun. (One of the actors gave us a thumbs up after one of the kids landed a piece of popcorn in his mouth--yes this is not only allowed, it is encouraged.) It was the first time in a while we all got to hang together as a family, with nobody whining about being bored or wishing she were somewhere else.  These days are becoming increasingly rare, with the kids' social calendars getting fuller  by the year.

PS

Sooooo, PS did pass her geometry test.  Not exactly with flying colors, but by enough to bring her overall grade to passing.  Of course, passing isn't exactly the standard of success in our house, so she is still under restrictions until she has at least a B. But as long as she passes this grading period, she will be able to go to the robotics finals in St. Louis. (She still has to toe the line, another bad grade will sink her.)

At least we now have a plan and a tutor in place who can help her out the rest of the year.  And she hopefully now realizes that she has to focus a little more on math and a little less on robotics.

Awkward

I'm in Hometown for the holiday and to finally probate MIL's estate. Yesterday the girls and I went to lunch with my mother at this tiny dive with awesome burgers on the most delicious homemade buns I've ever eaten.

Apparently my mother and stepdad are in there nearly every day and everybody knows them. My mother introduced our waitress as the lady who also cleans their house.

And then the waitress said, "you look really familiar, did you go to school here?"

It turns out that we went to high school together.  We weren't friends, and I only vaguely remembered her, although she seemed to have a better recollection of me.

She asked where I was living and what I was doing.  I tried to dodge the question the first time, but she asked again, more pointedly.

Never have I wanted less to admit that I am a lawyer--especially a Big City lawyer.  It just felt like bragging. And went I finally 'fessed up, she said, "That's great. I'm just a waitress."  How do you respond to that? I said something lame that I can't fully recall.

I went to a disadvantaged high school.  Lower socioeconomic status.  A lot of gangs and fighting.  A lot of teen pregnancy.  Not a lot of parent involvement.  I'm in the minority of kids who went on to college, and certainly who now have grad degrees. And while I worked hard to pull myself out of that situation and make a better life, I am also very lucky to have been blessed with brains, which made it a whole lot easier.

It was just a totally awkward situation.

And now for an Easter funny:

Last night SIL asked my adorable 3-year-old nephew if he wanted to dye eggs.  He got a horrified look on his face and said, with much disgust, "Why?  Why do we want to die the eggs?"

Advice for Young Lawyers: Quality over Quantity

I am working on a response to a 12(b)(6) motion. I rolled my eyes a bit because the author of the motion cited more than two dozen cases over about 5 pages. Not string cites, either. A new case for nearly every.single.sentence. Really, you couldn't find a single case that supported more than one point in the same paragraph? Id is your friend.

But my irritation at having to pull and read all those cases was quickly squelched when I read the very first case she cited.  She completely misstated the holding of the case--asserting that it holds the opposite of what it really does!  Clearly the Author was so busy throwing as much authority as possible at her point that she didn't bother to thoroughly read her cases. She picked out the good nuggets and ignored the rest.

Not only does this give me ammo that destroys her arguments, but it's also all the ammo I need for my own argument. I have my ace-in-the-whole case, and the other side handed it over on a silver platter.

This isn't the first time another party gave me good authority because they didn't thoroughly analyze their cases, but it is the most dramatic. Read you cases!

And really, a handful of solid cases is all you need to support any given argument. It's ok to cite a case more than once. Really.

Sometimes Being a Parent Sucks

...And Sometimes it is Awesome

The Suck

It came to our attention late Tuesday that PS, my formerly straight A student, is failing geometry.   She has struggled with geometry all year, but always managed at least a B when push came to shove.

She really bombed a test a couple of weeks ago. But so did everyone else, so we didn't worry too much. (We can see class averages and medians in the gradebook, plus PS has some insight on how her friends do.)  But  then she bombed the retake.  And then she bombed two quizzes.  And so things were looking really bad.

There is another test next week that could be a grade changer (tests count 60%, homework and quizzes 30%).  But PS had a robotics competition Thursday - Saturday which would mean missing 2 days of school immediately before this test.

So what kind of parent lets their kid go to a robotics competition and miss two days of school when she is failing a class and has an upcoming exam in that class?

I emailed PS's teacher about what she would be missing and how detrimental it would be.  She said there was a quiz that day that would be a good predictor of PS's success on the test.

And then on Wednesday we learned that PS failed that quiz, too.

And so we were left deciding whether to make her go to school and miss the one thing that she has been working on relentlessly for three months, or make her suffer the consequences of her grades.*

DH and I went back and forth.  It seemed appropriate to make her miss the competition.   She has spent a lot of energy on robotics and not so much on math. But on the other hand, she has worked really, really hard at robotics.

In the end, we let her go to the robotics competition.  We weren't sure if it was the best decision, but it seemed unfair to take it away from her with so little notice.  We also set forth a strict set of consequences and rules that she must follow until she is passing all classes again.  And I hired a tutor for an intense session tomorrow and then weekly for however long she needs it.  And one of the upperclassmen in robotics is going to tutor her during school.

And the Awesome

And now, we are so glad we let her go.  On Friday one of the team's mentors came up to us and said, "Are you PS's parents?  She is phenomenal." Yes, yes she is.

DH and PS have worked hard to put together the team's website and PS has been filming their competitions and practices and editing video to put on the website.  And on Friday night we made trading cards with a QR code leading to their website, which the rest of the team was amazed by.

And today her team won the regionals and now are heading to the world championships in St. Louis next month!  It was such a great weekend for her team and I'm so glad she got to be part of it.

Of course, she will not be going to the world championships if she doesn't pass geometry.  But I think we have a good plan in place, and hopefully, with the help of the tutor she will rock her test next week.

I hated the idea of making her miss her competition, but I also don't want to be the mom who is afraid to parent when the going gets tough.  And she is a genuinely good kid who works really hard.  Hopefully we made the right decision and it will all work out ok.  Because I really, really don't want to tell her that she can't go to the world championships because of her grades. But at least she already knows that consequence is on the table, which should be a good motivator.

*She wasn't automatically precluded because these grades haven't been reflected on a progress report or report card.  Also, Pre-Ap classes are inexplicably excluded from the no pass-no play rule.

Shopping!

So, we have been on a money diet for the past several weeks. We just kinda suck at budgeting, and I have been growing more concerned about the kids' rising expenses and paying for college, and we just decided that it was time to have a reboot of our finances. (You think it will get better once you get past diapers and formula and daycare.  Ha!  All that money and more goes to classes and camps and lessons and school trips and yearbooks and club dues and about a million other things.) Anyway, we have strictly limited our spending and have been putting big money toward debt reduction and savings. It hasn't been so bad, but there hasn't been much shopping lately.

But we are about to get DH's bonus money, and have allocated a nice chunk of that for mattresses.  We are in desperate, desperate need of new mattresses, and have decided to upgrade from queen to king. We spent  a good part of last weekend playing Goldilocks, trying this one and that one.  I think mattress shopping is one of the more awkward shopping experiences--lying bed in the middle of a store while random strangers saunter by. We've narrowed it down to two, both oh so plush and comfy, with a $500 difference between them.

And then, the real fun.  Since we are upgrading the size of our mattress, we need all new bedding, too.  I had a pretty good idea of what a mattress would cost, but I didn't even consider how much new bedding would cost. There is a hefty price jump in king sized linens.  And there is also the matter of an actual bed.  We haven't figured that one out yet. So much for the money diet.

And we need to repaint our bedroom.  I've been tired of our current sage green for a while--but I don't really know what I want to do next. I guess it depends on the bedding.

So mattress shopping has turned into bedding shopping, which has turned into paint color shopping, and also involves headboard shopping, which has all reminded me that I don't really like shopping that much to begin with.  But it will be nice to have a fresh new super-comfy bedroom.

Good Week

It has been a good week, professionally. I finally got a long-awaited decision in my favor on a complex multi-state procedural issue that I briefed back in December. Woot!

On the same day, I mediated a 3-year-old case with my very first client (that I brought in myself and whose 7-figure case I handled completely by myself) and got a great result.  But the best part is that the mediator, one of the other attorneys, and another party's insurance adjuster were very complimentary of me. The mediator said, in front of the other parties and their lawyers, "she is the only attorney who showed up today." Double woot!

In other news, work is very busy right now.  I have some kind of major event to prepare for every week for the rest of this month, plus a bunch of smaller fires that are turning out to be huge time sucks.  I'm not sure how I'm going to fit it all in.

And then,  even with everything else on my plate, I left early on Friday because I have a cold and was feeling pretty crappy.  I went to take a nap at 3:00 and didn't budge until 6:15 when the twins awakened me to take them to Girl Scouts.  I never sleep like that!

Feeling a bit better today.  I have a lot to do, but at least I can do it in my PJ's from my sofa.

And in case you are wondering about the robotics competition, they performed much better on Saturday and made it to the finals.  Unfortunately, the drew the #1 team in both rounds of the semi-finals and got knocked out. (That team was so good, there was no chance of beating it.) They've got another shot in a couple of weeks, so hopefully they will have all the kinks worked out by then and will make it to nationals.

Nerd Convention

We're spending the weekend at PS's robotics competition.  It has been so much fun, ans it is so amazing to see not only what these kids can create, but also, how many different ideas and designs all of the teams have come up with to accomplish the same task.

They have all had just a few weeks to design, build and program a robot that can throw frisbees into targets (both autonomously and with user-control) and then to climb a pyramid-shaped pole frame that is about 10 feet high.  These robots weigh over 120 pounds, so climbing is a major risk because if the robot falls it is likely destroyed. Just one team managed to climb all the way to the top, and it was amazing (yeah, I know I keep using that word)  to watch.

Only 3 kids from their 40ish person team are allowed on the field, but PS managed to score a super-special press pass, so she also gets to go down there to film.  DH helped her set up the team website, so she has taken off with that and gained a lot of cred with her team (especially for a freshman).  She's also been filming their practices and editing video for the site.  She's done a great job, and I'm so glad that her work has paid off by letting her get closer to the action.

We're also getting to see lots of family this weekend.  The competition is just a couple hours from hometown, so DH's dad came down. Because we live so far from family, the kids never have grandparents at their events, so this is kind of cool.  And DH's nephew has a baseball tournament here this weekend, so we've been able to spend some time with them and let the kids get some cousin time.   And my aunt is coming down today.  PS will have quite the cheering squad.

Today we have the last rounds of qualifying matches and then finals.  It's not looking great for PS's team.  Their robot is one of the better ones when it works, but they have had some unfortunate technical glitches.  And there are two teams here that are far above the rest.  The good news is that we signed up for another regional competition in a few weeks, so we should have some time to figure out the problems.  ( This team made it to nationals last year, so the kids have high expectations for themselves.)

Litigious Lawyering

Sitting at the airport at the end of a very long three days.  I met my client here on Monday for depo prep, and spent the last two days in depositions. There was an unbelievable amount of drama leading up to these depositions because one attorney refused to produce his clien after agreeing to these dates long ago (and after I had to jump through hoops and set a hearing to even get dates in the first place).

But two of the three noticed depos went forward and I got a certificate of nonappearance for the third. There will be a motion for sanctions, among other things, as soon as I return.  The whole ordeal was just unnecessarily contentious--at least before we all sat down in the same room.

And then OC told me today that I was nothing like what he had pictured before meeting me.  I guess he was expecting an ogre.  And after we were done, I had lunch with another OC and we worked through a lot.  It went really well.

Hopefully, this weeks's events will help move us to resolution.  If not, there is sure to be a lot more drama.  But I do think the in-person meetings were helpful to understanding one another's personalities.  Sometimes this electronic era is not what's best for our clients.

Terrified

PS went to the movies with a friend tonight.  A perfectly normal thing for a teenager to do, in our sleepy suburban city with few other options. We sent her off and told her to have fun and text us when the movie was out if we needed to pick up. So, thank god, out phones were nearby when this text came in:

Movie's out.  Apparently two people for shot in the parking lot.  There are ambulances and police cars and helicopters.

OMG.  DH and I both went flying out the door,  and I broke many traffic laws heading to the theater. DH called PS on the car bluetooth so we could both hear.  She was fine. It all happened while they were in the movie and they didn't even know anything until they came out.

But still, I sobbed all the way there and most of the way home. I don't even want to imagine a scarier text.

And these things don't happen here.  I don't live in Big City.  I live in a tiny suburb with virtually no crime.  Until last spring, there had only been two murders here in recorded history.  And then one of PS's classmates was killed by her mother's boyfriend.  And now this. (We don't know the condition of the victims.)

I don't ever want to let my children leave the house again. I try not to be an over-reactor.  I tend to rely on statistics to convince myself that my children will be safe when I send them out into the world.  But this was too, too close.  A few minutes' difference, some changed circumstance--who knows what might have happened? 

Grumpy and Whining

My doctor love has seriously faded. I met with the gastro today. Yes, I need the scope, blah, blah, blah.  Losing 15 pounds or so would probably help, too. (Thanks. As if I didn't know that.) I may be within the small percentage of people for whom surgery is recommended because of the long-term effects of the acid reducers on my bone density. We'll just have to see what it looks like in there. And we can schedule the scope as soon as I'm ready and have pre-paid it (because I haven't met the deductible on my crappy insurance). Yay. SS gets her braces this week.  I was so looking forward to writing another big check.

Not 15 minutes after I got back to my office, the new GP called with my lab results.  No stomach-ulcer causing bacteria.  But my cholesterol was high and my Vitamin D is low (and one of the only places to get Vitamin D is in milk and milk is full of cholesterol--WTF?) Doc is putting me on a prescription megadose of the D.

So I'm feeling like a fat ass whose problems would all be solved if I weren't such a fat ass. And then Girl Scout cookies came in today.  Yes, I'm a fat ass with 150 boxes of cookies in my dining room. FML.

How do you spell relief?

More than a year ago I made a New Year's resolution to find a new family practitioner.  I felt like my current GP just didn't listen to me.  And she never did anything to make me feel better.  She made me feel like a hypochondriac.  I go to the doctor maybe twice a year--when something weird is going on or I am so sick I think I'm about to die.  And her advice is usually something along the lines of "take a Benadryl."

It was so bad that the last couple of times I was sick, I went to urgent care (and paid 3x my copay) because I knew they would actually give me something to make me feel better.

And way back when I broke both ankles, and she discovered that I have low bone-density, she decided that I could no longer have my prescription for Protonix filled because it is contraindicated for low bone density.

I have terrible, awful acid reflux.  Vomit in my sleep and aspirate it, bad. Can't even drink water some days (yes, literally) bad. Lumps of food stick in my throat bad.

She said, take Zantac, raise the head of your bed, modify your diet.  I did those things.  Zantac didn't work, DH HATES having the bed raised (but it is), I don't drink coffee or soda or eat anything with red sauce.  And it is still terrible, and she still she wouldn't give me anything.

So finally, finally, today I went to a new doc.  And as soon as I told him my symptoms he said that I needed a scope.  And her ordered a bunch of labs, including a test for an ulcer-causing bacteria that no one has ever looked for before.  And he put me back on the Protonix, even with the low bone density.

And with all that--even getting 5 vials of blood drawn and facing a so-not-fun endoscopy in the future--I left the doctor's office happy.  I was so stunned that I didn't have to convince him that my situation was truly bad.  That I needed to be fixed. I didn't leave feeling like I was some kinds of drug whore (I didn't even take pain pills after I gave birth to twins, but old doc wouldn't give me so much as an antibiotic.)

Why is it so easy to advocate for others and ignore ourselves?  I would never put up with this treatment of a client or my children.

Freedom!

This is the first weekend in I don't even know how long that we have nothing to do.  No hauling kids around to games and practices, no commitments, nada. The twins left on Friday to go camping with their Girl Scout troop.  Poor PS is sidelined with norovirus (otherwise we would be hauling her around).

So what the heck do we do with a rare free weekend? Yesterday, we decided to head to Ikea.  It's a 30-mile drive in city traffic, so we only go once or twice a year.  And the kids HATE it. So it was nice to go and dawdle and not listen to any griping kids.  Woot!  And I bought a small trash bin full of stuff and still came in under $40--double woot!

Then we headed to a nearby mall and I got the new iphone, which was my slightly late birthday gift from DH. My old phone was a slow, slightly-buggy 3gs, so I was in desperate need of an upgrade, and we had great fun asking Siri stupid questions on the way home.

Next, we headed to a fun, always-crowded mexican restaurant for lunch.  And we were seated within  5 minutes.  Do you know how much easier it is to get a table for 2 than a table for 5? And we spent less than $20!

Finally, we wandered back home, with a quick stop for groceries. After unloading, I crashed on the sofa and took a 2-hour nap--something I could never get away with if the twins were home.

We spent the evening watching The Dark Knight Rises with PS.  She had DH saw the midnight premiere in the theater, but I had not seen it. I have to say, I was not impressed, but dark and depressing isn't really my idea of entertainment.  And Bane's voice was unbelievable annoying.

Halfway through, PS was starving and feeling much better, so we headed out for ice cream (in a drive-thru), barefoot and in out pj pants.

It was a good day.

Of Course...

...my printer would say it's out of toner when I am trying to print W-2's on the day before they are due.  And, of course, it's not really out of toner--the stupid printer industry is just trying to trick me into buying a $75 cartridge that I don't even need yet.

I finally managed to cajole it into printing my docs, but this is why procrastination is bad. 

And don't even get me started on what the stupid required W-2 forms cost--$17!  I needed ONE--ONE form--  but the smallest I can find is a pack of 10--for $17!

And just for grins, I went ahead and did a quick prep of my taxes.  We owe a decent chunk--but thankfully nothing close to the 5-figure hit we took when I first started working and we screwed up our withholdings.   Still, I thought we were going to be closer to breaking even this year. I think I need to buy a bigger house so we can take a bigger mortgage interest deduction (yeah, right!).  It is so frustrating to be phased out of every other freaking deduction--especially student loans, when the only reason I have a high income is because I have student loans out the wazoo.


Oh, and I got the quote for SS's braces today.  $5k.  Why didn't anyone tell me braces cost $5k? But after asking everybody I saw today who has ever had a kid in braces, that seems to be the going rate around here.  I guess I live in a fairy land where braces actually cost less than my first 2 cars combined (ok, they were really crappy cars).

Defenders of the Downtrodden

That would be SS and TT.

Early in the school year, TT made a new friend, M.  I'd never met M because she was new to the school. Soon, TT started talking about M being bullied at school.  Over and over again, this topic would come up, and we would talk about how to respond (walk away when possible, and stand up for your friends). TT and SS assured me that they were not the target of the bullying, but it was relentless against M, mostly because of her weight (and, yes, we did talk to the teachers about this).

This week seemed to be a breaking point, and  TT and SS told me that they accompanied M to visit the counselor because "she just couldn't take it anymore." The girls reported that they were in the counselor's office for two class periods.

That prompted me to call the counselor to get a fuller picture.  To find out how much bullying was really going on (because it is such a buzzword these days) and that my girls weren't being pulled into someone else's self-created drama. To confirm my girls' reports that they were not being bullied (they are not).

The counselor confirmed that there is some bullying, but that she also talked to the girls about what is bullying and what is just rude behavior. She has been involved with M, and it seems like the child just has a tough life.  She is being picked on for her weight and because she lives in a trailer park. There are some tough family dynamics.

The counselor also thinks my girls are a great influence on M. That they show her how to be strong against the bullies and that they are accepting of her no matter what.  I mentioned that I had been intending to invite M over, because I did not know her, and the counselor thought that was a great idea, but warned that M was very self-conscious about not being able to reciprocate. (And we intended to have her over this weekend, and poor TT got sick.)

So we will do what we can to help her out, and show her that she can have friends no matter what.  Her family situation seems a lot like mine was.  I was so lucky to have friends in junior high and high school where I spent a lot of time to get away from my own miserable situation. 

Late last week, the girls accompanied another bullied classmate to the counselor's office for a rap session. To call this child irritating is an understatement, and even my girls have limited patience for her, but I have always insisted that they are kind to her, and they have been.  Apparently, she was this week's target of the bullying, and my girls stepped in to help her out.

I've been trying to think of something more proactive the girls can do.  They truly are right in the middle of the mean girls stage (we somehow managed to skip this with PS--I have no idea how). I think my girls have a bit of power because they are fairly popular, but so far they haven't managed to shame the bullies into quitting their antics. Maybe it's just a matter of surviving this year and moving on to middle school where the pond is much bigger.

So Proud

While playing Monopoly tonight I was bidding against SS for a property. I said " Ha! I get it because you don't have enough cash!" To which she replied, " yeah, I know. I was just bidding you up."

Me: "Wait, how do you even know what that means?"

SS: "From watching Storage Wars." Duh.

She definitely takes after her mother in her no-holds- barred Monopoly gamesmanship.

Boring

Life has become quite boring.  That is generally a good thing, but it doesn't really make for blog fodder.  And we are so very slow at work.  I hate being bored at work.  The days pass so slowly--among other reasons why being slow at work is not a good thing.

We finally changed ISP's because our service through AT&T was ridiculously slow and they don't offer anything faster in our almost-rural neighborhood. DH was reluctant to change because he couldn't bear to give up his 15-year old email address.  I finally put my foot down and told him it was his email address or me--we needed faster internet. The change is stunning.  We can finally stream without poor quality and hiccups every 5 minutes.  And we can stream on multiple devices at once.  Yay!

With our new-found streaming capabilities, I reactivated Netflix.  And started watching Downton Abbey.  Although I've heard much about it, I really had no interest because it looked so very dry. But I was bored and gave it a try and now I am hooked.  I finished off the first season, and just activated a free trial of Hulu Plus so that I can watch the second season, and I am trying very hard to avoid any spoilers. My only complaint is that I HATE the score.  It is so heavy-handed.  It takes me back to my childhood when the Young and the Restless would come on at my grandma's house.  I hated that theme, too. It just seemed to predict sadness.

Along the same lines, I have almost convinced DH to give up cable and move to streaming only.  We watch so little television that it just doesn't justify the $80/month price tag. There are 5 shows that we regularly record on our DVR.  Most of them are available on Hulu, and the remainder we could buy on itunes and still spend less than half what we spend on cable. Has anyone successfully ditched cable for streaming devices?

Other than that, I am a taxi driver.  Last night I had to drop SS at volleyball at 6:30, TT at Girl Scouts at 7:00, pick up SS at 7:30 and drop her off at Girl Scouts, pick up PS at 8:00 from robotics, hit the store for emergency wine and cupcakes, and head back to pick up SS and TT by 8:30 (although, blessedly, their BFF offered them a ride home, which saved that final trip.)  The kids are busy, even if I am not these days.  Poor PS is at school every night until 8:00 preparing for their first robotics competition.  Their robot has to throw a Frisbee at a target while fighting off competing robots.  It is truly amazing what these kids are able to do. Because they are working so late, parents are taking turns taking meals up to the kids.  I think I am going to take a couple of pork roasts and make pulled pork for sandwiches.  Any other suggestions for feeding 30 teenagers?  They are sick of pizza and tacos.  Pasta's been done quite a bit, too.

The good news about busy kids--we have found little pockets of alone time.  On Wednesday nights all of the kids have stuff going on, and we have two hours to go to dinner or have grown-up time in an empty house. Even though the kids are now big enough to leave alone, we don't do it very often because, well, we're usually so busy that we feel like we should spend time with the kids.  But these little pockets of kid-free time because the kids are busy are totally guilt-free.  Yay! So, moms of toddlers, take comfort that someday, many years from now,  your kids will have more active social lives than you, and you will actually be able to eat a complete meal, while it's still hot, without having to cut up anyone's food, and while having an adult conversation. And you won't even have to pay a babysitter.