Legally Certifiable

Seriously, God?

2012-02-01T19:42:00.000-06:00

My brother is at the hospital with my 8 year old niece who has appendicitis and is being taken to surgery. Are you freaking kidding me?

Another day, another ... heck, I don't know!

2012-01-31T08:58:00.000-06:00

So my mother is stable and she looks a whole lot better. But she will be having surgery. Again. I spoke with the infectious disease doc yesterday morning who said that the infection likely stemmed from her bones or one of her prostheses. He said that surgery was a reasonable possibility, but it would be the surgeon's call, and that they could just do a debridement, or possibly have to remove the newly installed parts.

The surgeon told her that he is just doing the debridement, but I wonder if he just didn't mention that removing the new parts is a possibility. Reading between the lines, I'm concerned that amputation is a possibility, but I'm not mentioning that to her.

And the infectious disease doc said that at a minimum she is looking at several more weeks on IV antibiotics.

So we've essentially rebooted and this story is never going to end.

I had to go to the library after the hospital, and once I sat down in the quiet peace of the law library and processed all of this, it was all I could do to hold back tears. (Can you imagine some crazed lawyer lady crying in the middle of a law school library?) This is going to go on for months. Last month there was a light at the end of the tunnel and now there is not.

I'm spread as thin as I can go. I really don't know what to change to do differently to lighten the load. I have new housekeepers starting today for weekly cleanings and I am scrambling to hire a new nanny, because those are about the only things I can do to relieve some of my stress. (The nanny is not so much a babysitter as a chaos control agent--making sure the girls are doing homework and transporting them to activities and making sure my house isn't a disaster when I come home in the evenings.)

On the bright side, we are in the middle of settling three big cases at work. It is certainly good timing for me, as it will lighten the load at work a bit. But I'm also meeting with a new client this morning, so who knows what that will bring.

LC on WebMD

2012-01-29T20:03:00.000-06:00

So, in a move all doctors hate, I was googling my mother's condition this morning. I was trying to figure out if sepsis could really have had such sudden onset that the doc who examined her the same morning didn't pick up on it. Apparently it is possible for sepsis to develop over a matter of hours.

But in researching that issue, I learned that the mortality rate for people with her risk factors (poor health, auto-immune disorder, long time on antibiotics) who develop sepsis is very high. It seems I underestimated the seriousness of her condition. I guess I'm just so used to her having to go to the hospital all the freaking time that I'm sort of desensitized to it.

I talked to her internist this morning, who confirmed that her condition is very serious. And he said that we really wouldn't know how serious until 72 hours had passed. I guess they need to see how she responds to the medications that she is on.

They also found a blood clot today and installed a stint. My super awesome husband went up to the hospital during that procedure because I had just returned from visiting her when she called and was supposed to meet with the nanny candidates that I had cancelled on yesterday.

And so, I guess we sit and wait.

Blogging ... it's cheaper than therapy

2012-01-28T22:06:00.000-06:00

You know how my uncle was supposed to be taking my mother home today, after five whole months here? Yeah, that didn't happen.

My mother developed sepsis overnight and was taken to the ER. Apparently I never turned the volume back on my phone after my hearing yesterday, so I didn't see the 9 missed calls until 9:00 this morning.

WTF? She saw her surgeon on Friday and he said she was ok to go home. I saw her Friday night, and she was perfectly fine.

Anyway, I called the ER doc to get the scoop (he left his personal cell number!). She told him that her daughter was a lawyer and he clearly did not want to take responsibility for anything that happened to her and was peeved that he couldn't reach her surgeon. She was at a small neighborhood hospital and he wanted her transferred to the big hospital where she had her surgeries. I had no disagreement, as the big hospital is certainly a better facility that the tiny no-name hospital she was currently in.

So, I spent my Saturday at the hospital. I was supposed to interview nannies this morning, and I had to cancel the interviews at the last minute. And I almost cried when I had to tell my girls that I would not get to spend the day with them. I had had a very busy week and was definitely feeling like I was not getting enough girlie time.

I know it's irrational, but I'm angry with her. I swear I feel like she somehow psychosomatically created this so that she didn't have to go home. (She doesn't want to go home--that's another long story.) I needed her to go home. My time is full with my job and my kids and running my house. I've had hardly any downtime since she's been here--because if I have any extra time, I have to stop in and see her, or rearrange my weekend to see her. And usually there's not extra time anyway, and so it's taking away time from my kids or my job. And right this minute, I am really, really busy at work and so she's taking away time with my kids. And it just makes me angry. Because she never made time for her kids. She didn't rearrange her job or her life for us. And the thing I want the most in life is to not be like her. And yet she's making me like her because I'm not spending time with my kids. (I told you this post wasn't rational.)

So anyway, I stayed with her until they got her transferred to the big hospital. She is in ICU there, and probably won't be moved to a regular room for at least another day or two. The ICU nurse gave me a look of incredulity when I left this evening. I guess people usually camp out when a relative is in ICU, from the looks of the chaotic ICU waiting room. But I didn't see what I could do there, and my kids needed me at home.

And so I brought home pizza and we had movie night.

And tomorrow I will have to go back to the hospital, and I rescheduled the nanny interviews, and I have some work that I need to do, and I need to send out the W-whatever to our old nanny, and my house is a wreck (but new housekeepers start Tuesday!) and I need to do laundry, and we can just forget about grocery shopping, but at least I did a big shopping trip last weekend.

I feel like I have absolutely no control over my life any more.

Great Day Parts 2 and 3 (But it's getting better!)

2012-01-26T22:30:00.001-06:00

Oh please let this week end soon.

Wednesday:

I settled a $10M case for 4 figures. (It's not nearly as impressive as it sounds. But it was good to get my client out of a complex, multi-party case that was going to be very expensive to defend.)

I got threatened with a $100M lawsuit. (Guess we hit a nerve with that Complaint!)

I filed a motion for sanctions against yesterday's lawyer for failing to remove his improperly noticed hearing from the Friday's docket. (I forgot about the mailbox rule in my last post, so I didn't even have to rely on the lame technical late fax argument.)

I finally got home from work at 10:00 pm.

Thursday:

Telephone hearing with arbitrator (my first arbitration!)

Worked my tail off to draft a substantive response to the bullshit, late-filed motion, but had it on file by 4:00 (yay e-filing!)

Got another late-filed bullshit motion from the same opposing counsel that completely manipulates two different statutes. Happily learn that I completely anticipated and countered opposing counsel's arguments in the response I had just filed. Feel very good about arguing against this bullshit motion because I read every single case involving one of the statutes when I did my annual survey a few weeks ago, and I fully researched the other statute for another case recently. (Unfortunately there is absolutely no case law construing both of the statutes together. This would be a great case to take up on appeal.)

Left the office at 5:15 (Woot!), terrible traffic, grabbed kids for a quick dinner, then had to go buy a gift for a baby shower at work tomorrow.

Back home by 8:00, drafted outline of arguments for hearing tomorrow. Got all my mother's crap together so that I can drop it off because my uncle is driving her home Saturday morning!!!!

Tomorrow:

Hearing, baby shower, drop off mother's crap.

Great Day (please note sarcasm)

2012-01-24T23:05:00.000-06:00

I was busy at work--but that's ok. I'd rather be busy than not. But I had to leave at 5:00 because PS had her freshman information fair tonight starting at 6:30. On an average day it's an hour commute home, and today it was raining so I really didn't have a second to spare.

As I was leaving the office at 5:00, I stopped by the printer and noticed a fax coming in for me. I could tell it was a motion and I wasn't going to be happy about it, but it was still printing and I didn't have time to wait, so I just asked an assistant to scan it to me as soon as it came through.

Rushed home, picked up PS, and headed over to the high school (which is so much farther from our house than her other schools and about 3 times as far away as the closest high school). Opened up the motion to find that I am indeed not happy about it. The motion is set for hearing this Friday (because we already have two other motions set at the same time). So I am essentially given three day's notice of a hearing on a motion that is the equivalent of a MSJ. That is just sleazy lawyering. I don't dispute your right to zealously defend your client, but to set an evidentiary motion for hearing with three days' notice is just slimy.You couldn't have even got the court to set a hearing that fast if we weren't already on the docket.

Actually, he didn't technically give me three days' notice. Our rules state that service by fax has to be received by 5:00 or it will be effective the next day. His motion is stamped 5:01. Not a point that I would normally argue, but in this case I think it is justified.

I am booked the next two days, so it is going to mean late nights to prepare any kind of proper response to this ridiculous motion. And I had an email from a co-defendant asking what my plan was because he is in depositions the next two days. So that was happy news.

And, OMG, the freshman fair had a parent meeting that lasted almost 2 hours. Kill me now. (But it did make me happy to see PS and her girlfriends sitting together and whispering and giggling because she is not normally a giggling, whispering kind of girl).

Stopped on the way home to pick up take out for dinner, and finally set down to eat at 9:15.

Whew! And did I mention it was my birthday? Oh yeah.

At least PS baked a cake for me, so my house smells like cakey goodness and I have some chocolate frosting to drown my troubles in.

How Not to Behave in a Deposition

2012-01-21T13:30:00.000-06:00

I find myself frequently lamenting the decline of civility and good manners. There are some temp workers in my office building who have yet to figure out that letting passengers off of the elevator before you pile in is not only polite, but common sense. When we went to see the Nutcracker people were coming in a full 15 minutes after the performance began, never mind that floor seats started at $50. And at the twins' orchestra concert I received an unbelievably rude response from an grandfatherly type when I politely asked him to quit talking during the performances.

So I don't have great expectations from the general public. But I do expect better from attorneys in a deposition. I guess those expectations are misplaced, too.

I spent three days last week in depositions in a big multi-party case. The room was packed with lawyers. On the second day, one older lawyer asked another attorney if he could borrow her laptop to check on something during a break. She generously agreed, and he proceeded to dominate her laptop during the rest of the deposition. The third day he again commandeered her laptop. And then he started talking. Through the entire deposition, while the poor court reporter was trying to focus and take down the testimony of the deponent. At one point he took a phone call right in the middle of the deposition--without bothering to get up and leave! All the while typing as loudly as humanly possible on the laptop that wasn't his.

He was oblivious to the shaking heads and pointed looks directed at him, and I was surprised nobody said anything. (I was close to it, but I didn't want to further disturb the questioning.)

At the end of the day he thanked the lawyer from whom he had borrowed the laptop for allowing him to ensure he got his desired tee time! She asked if he was going to bring his own laptop to the next round of depos, but he said it was too much trouble. Of course it's much easier to just take over someone else's stuff.

Honestly, my children behave better than this "professional" who was obsessing over his golf game on his client's dime.

Out of Control

2012-01-15T09:25:00.000-06:00

Feeling a bit out of control. I just don't seem to have enough time lately to get everything done. It's always been a delicate balance between work and family, but I've always managed to pull it off. But lately, more things seem to be falling between the cracks.

For instance, a couple of months ago I ordered some things online. I was in search of a mustard-yellow sweater, but the one that arrived was baby-diarrhea yellow. There was also a belt that I loved but it was too big. It was about $60 worth of merchandise that I needed to return, but I kept putting it off. Shortly before Christmas I looked at the receipt to check my deadline for the return and determined it was in mid-January. So last week I dug it out of my closet to finally return it--and when I checked the receipt again the deadline was in December (apparently I couldn't do simple math back in December.) So now I'm one of those people who donates things to Goodwill with the tags still on, because I couldn't get my shit together.

And then, right before Christmas I got a parking ticket while in court for a hearing. I parked directly next to the meter and loaded it up with every cent I could dig out of every nook and cranny in my car. So when I came out and say the ticket flapping on my windshield, I knew it was unjustified. Indeed, there were still 52 minutes on my meter. I really wanted to fight that ticket--but it was only $35 and wasn't sure it was worth my time. I fumed about it for a couple of days. And then I completely forgot about it and my hearing date passed and my $35 ticket suddenly jumped to $65 and my opportunity to fight it disappeared. (In my defense there was only 2 weeks to deal with the ticket from the day it was written, and because of the holidays, only about 5 working days. But still...) Once again I need to get my shit together.

At least it is only these minor things that I'm failing at. My job and the kids are still ok. But it still leaves me feeling out of sorts.

I think the problem is a combination of losing our beloved nanny in the fall and having to deal with my mother. We tried replacing the nanny with a housekeeper, but she just didn't work out. And I think am going to have to go back to a nanny. And then there's my mother. I keep having to take time off for her surgeries and doctor's appointments. She calls and demands things. Her caseworkers and doctors call me. She keeps getting moved from one facility to another (because medicare will only pay for each type of facility for a certain number of days). And the last facility was a minimum 45 minute drive from my house (the others I could make part of my commute to or from work). I feel like she is sucking every free moment I have and many of my not-free moments. And I will admit that I am resentful. Because I feel like I was forced into this position. And I know that she would not do the same for me--nor would she have done it for her own parents. She keeps hinting about coming to stay with me, but I have unequivocally told her no.

Shit My Mom Says

2012-01-11T20:57:00.000-06:00

Today I had to attend a doctor's appointment with my mother and at the end we had to visit with the surgery coordinator because the doc scheduled a day surgery to clean out her incision that's not healing well. I had to deal with the surgery coordinator a lot when her custom hip implant was so delayed, and the surgery coordinator was really an advocate for her.

So anyway, the surgery coordinator has a picture of her beautiful infant twins sitting on her desk. And my mother decides to pop up and ask, "Is one of your twins black?"

The poor surgery coordinator looked shocked.

And I said, "you cannot ask questions like that."

And the sweet surgery coordinator said, "no, she just has a darker skin tone."

And she said, "do they have the same father?"

And the surgery coordinator just stared and said, "yes."

And so my mother says, "is your husband hispanic?"

And the surgery coordinator said, "no."

And so my mother says, "so is the mailman?"

And I said sharply, "Mother, you are not old enough or senile enough to be asking such offensive questions."

I guess I managed to shame her, because she apologized to the poor girl, who was very nice about it all, but I can't imagine what she was thinking.

Seriously, WTF is wrong with her? She's not senile, she's not on any drugs that seem to otherwise impair her judgment, she's only 61--so she grew up in the 60's and should be fully aware that interrogating anybody about their ethnicity or the origin of their children is inappropriate.

Supposedly she only has two more weeks here and then she goes back home. Please god, let it be true. She keeps joking about coming to stay with me and I flat out told her absolutely no way.

New Years Goals No 4 - Personal Peace and Sanity

2012-01-09T09:10:00.001-06:00

I'm busy (duh!) I work long days, I have three kids, and I'm partly caring for my mother right now. I don't think anyone will argue that it makes for a hectic life (except my mother who seems to think I at her beck and call). But I do think I need to make it a priority to carve out more purposeful down time. I tend to default to watching tv or surfing the internet when I do have unscheduled time (mostly the internet, I really don't watch much tv). I guess it's easier to just plop down on the sofa with my computer than to figure out something else to do, but I feel like I'm spending way too many hours each day in front of a screen (and my eyes usually punish me for it).

I like creating things, and I have a room with a big workspace. Back when I was a SAHM I was always working on some kind of crafty project, but now they are few and far between. I'm thinking about signing up for a block-of-the-month. I haven't quilted in a long time, and trying to take on an entire project sounds overwhelming--something I'm likely to buy all the materials for and then give up on. But I think a BOM might be just right. Just a small project each month and then I get another block the next month to remind me to keep going. The only problem is that I haven't found a BOM that I really love. So I may just end up buying a pattern and materials.

I also think I should start playing music again. I occasionally drag out my flute when I am helping out the twins as they practice their violin and viola. I'm surprised that I can still play at all, but it's actually not that bad. (I've lost my very high and very low ranges and I definitely can't play complex pieces at the speed I once could.) But music is a great stress reliever. I practiced a lot back when I played. Hours every day. I was complaining to my grandmother about my twins not practicing and she said, "well, the reason you practiced so much is because that was your escape from everything that was going on at home." I was a little surprised that my grandmother was this perceptive, but she was dead on. Playing music was my escape--a way to vent my anger and frustration over things that, as a kid, I had no control. I don't have the angst that I did back then, but I think it would still be a good stress reliever.

Third is exercise. My default excuse is that I don't have time. That's only partly true. If I try hard enough, I can find time. And even when it's cold and dark outside (which is usually the case before and after work) I've found playing Just Dance on the wii with the kids is a great workout.

New Years Goals: No 2 - Health

2012-01-08T11:31:00.004-06:00

First, find a new GP. I hate my GP. I feel like she doesn't listen to me and she doesn't really do anything when I go see her. I only visit like twice a year when I really feel like I'm dying, and her best advice is usually "take a Benadryl." A few weeks ago when I picked up some kind of nastiness that just wouldn't go away, I went to the urgent care center. Why? Because I knew they would give me drugs--even if it was only for placebo effect. And they did, along with a steroid shot, which I think really did make me feel better.

So, find a new GP, then resolve outstanding issues.

1) My feet. Am I still grounded from running? I need to have a new bone density test to see if I am actively losing bone mass or if I have always had old lady bones. And is all that calcium and vitamin D I've been taking actually doing anything?

2) GERD. I have indigestion. All.the.time. I eat Tums like candy. My bed is elevated 6 inches above my feet (DH loves this!), but I still vomit in my sleep and then aspirate it if I eat too late. (Yeah, that's disgusting and I probably shouldn't have shared.) I had a scrip for Protonix which actually worked quite well. But the GP referenced above refused to refill my prescription because it affects bone density. She told me to take OTC Zantac, which DOES NOT WORK! So I started taking OTC Prilosec which is pretty much the same thing as Protonix, and clearly states on the box you are only supposed to take for two weeks. But I take it all the time, bones be damned. Clearly I need to get this situation under control. But I think the real answer is to drop 20 pounds.

3) Get in better shape. (Oh how cliche!) DH got me a bike since I'm banned for running. Now I just need to make it a priority to find the time and the motivation to use it. And I need to work in strength training--the real key to avoiding any more breaks in my old lady bones.

And, of course, I need to improve my diet. I actually did make some positive changes last year that stuck. (Unfortunately they did not affect my fatness.) I quit drinking sodas and started drinking water. I limited french fries to no more than once a week (we did eat a lot of fast food, but have substantially reduced). I started bringing apples and raw almonds to munch on at work, instead of the carby crap we keep in the kitchen. I mostly stopped grabbing fast food on my way home on late nights. I started keeping oatmeal (w/ extra fiber and protein) in my drawer at work and eating breakfast every day.

But there is plenty of room for improvement. When I cook, everything I make has cream or butter. I need to find healthier recipes. (But cream and butter make everything delicious!) We need to add more veggies to our diet. And I need to log what I eat, because that, I think, is the key to effective dieting and portion control.

Gee, that doesn't sound so hard.

New Years Goals: No 3 - Home

2012-01-07T17:14:00.000-06:00

First, hire a new housekeeper. I had to fire mine last week. She was a very nice person, but she was not a very good housekeeper. And the biggest problem was that she wasn't showing up when she was supposed to be here, and twice left me scrambling to get the kids to their activities. (She was supposed to work from 3:30 - 6:30 in the afternoons so that she would be here with the kids and could transport them when needed.) Week after week her check was half what it should have been because she didn't work the days or times that she was supposed to. I could have lived with the less than stellar housekeeping, but not the unreliability.So now I have to start the hiring process all over again. Arghhh.

Second, create a zen space in my bedroom.

My bedroom is the only non-public space on the first floor--so it's become the place stuff gets stashed when we don't know what to do with it or people are coming over. The clutter definitely has an anti-calming effect.

And we recently had to replace our bedding after ours ripped beyond repair. I love the new bedding, but it does not coordinate with the sage green walls that we now have. And I'm kind of over the green. Definitely time for a new coat of paint.

I put a ton of effort into making an awesome pad for the twins--now it's time to do the same for me! This is a top priority project. My plan is to declutter over the next couple of weekends, then paint!

Third, all the little things. I'll admit it--DH and I are 90 per-centers. We get 90% through a project and then we stop. We put in new flooring and baseboards, but the baseboards still need to be caulked. And we put in new trim around the windows and a new back door and they all need to be painted. I guess we need to make a list of all of those little odds and ends and try to knock out one per weekend.

New Years Goals: No 1 - Professional

2012-01-07T10:05:00.000-06:00

I'm not really into the whole resolution thing, but there are some things I would like to accomplish this year. And setting up a goal isn't much good without setting up a plan for implementing it. So I guess I'll make this a series instead of one long-ass post.

First up--Add three new clients this year

I need to actively work on building a bigger book of business. I have brought in about 4 clients and right now I have 2 active clients. My yearly receivables are about $30k. The only way I can grow professionally is to develop a book of business. In my firm, I am getting the most meaty litigation experience from my own cases. Otherwise, as in every firm, the partners get to do the most interesting work. Also, if I ever want to open up my own firm, I'm going to need my own clients. This isn't necessarily something that I want to do--I really don't like the administrative side of running a law practice--but it would be nice to know that I had that option if I needed it.

So how do I accomplish this? Networking.

Blah. I hate networking. I am not a people person, I am a recluse at heart. I hate cocktail parties and I am terrible at starting up conversations. So maybe my first goal should really be learning how to talk to strangers. But I think that is one of those sink or swim kind of things where you really just have to jump in and do it until you get used to it.

I've actually started taking the baby-steps toward this goal. I somehow managed to get myself appointed to three local bar association committees. This will allow me to network with lawyers in other industries who might be a good source for referrals.

And I'm writing my state law survey to be included with the national survey. This will get my name in front of lawyers in my industry in other states--another possible source of referrals.

Other things I need to do:

1) Join the Women in the ________ Industry group. This will allow networking with potential clients. And in this male-dominated industry where women are referred to as "skirts," I think women appreciate working with other women.

2 )Join an industry trade group and attend their monthly meetings. There are tons, and most of the attorneys in my firm belong to at least one of them, so I guess I need to follow their paths.

3) Start speaking. To somebody--lawyers, trade groups. I need to get in front of people and talk about what I know. I don't really have a fear of public speaking, but I do have a fear of people expecting me to know answers that I don't have.

I am Sixteen, Going on Seventeen

2011-12-30T08:54:00.000-06:00

I've been married 16 years today, that is. Wow. That seems like a really long time. And how are we spending this 16th anniversary? DH is getting a colonoscopy. Fun! He's only 36 (50 is usually when they recommend that you start getting colonoscopies), but he is now only 10 years younger than his mom was when she was first diagnosed. She was stage IV at her initial diagnosis--and the doctors waited too long to do that first colonoscopy because of her age. She had to push to have it done, but she knew something wasn't right with her body. So, we aren't messing around with DH. I demanded that he have this procedure done, even though it's about the last thing in the world he wants to do. Happy anniversary, baby!

In other news, my four days of bliss were indeed blissful but Tuesday was back to the grind. Work was steady and then my brother decided to make a last-minute trip here to visit our mother, and then they finally discharged her from the hospital to a new rehab facility at 7:00 Tuesday night. Unfortunately, this new facility is not at all convenient for me to get to--in the opposite direction of my home and office and requiring a trek through multiple highways and heavy traffic. I've already warned her that my visits will be much fewer.

And at work I somehow managed to get roped into preparing an annual survey of my state's law in my practice area for a national survey put together the relevant ABA section forum. When I agreed to this, I was told the deadline was in the spring. It's actually the end of this year. Oh boy. I started gathering materials yesterday. My state generates a huge body of case law, so there is a lot to sort through. We've also got several substantial legislative updates, but my firm helped draft most of them so at least I'm up to speed on those. And my biggest challenge will be tailoring this down. It's only supposed to be a couple of pages with a few short paragraphs. What I've drafted so far is more like a law review article.

Meanwhile, we're heading to Hometown either this afternoon or tomorrow (depending on how DH feels after being Roto-Rooted). We made reservations to kennel Bob, but we completely forgot about Stefanie, the guinea pig. The kennel doesn't take rodents. We could throw her in the car, but she stresses easily and I don't think she will handle it well. We could ask a neighbor to check in on her, but I feel like they are always helping us out and we never reciprocate (not because we aren't willing, but because they never ask). I guess I better figure this out.

Down Time

2011-12-23T10:02:00.000-06:00

I have the next four days off of work. And no company--not even any family parties to attend because everyone else will be out of town. This may sound sad to some, but it sounds absolutely wonderful to me because I am in desperate need of down time. There is nothing that I have to do and nowhere that I have to be over the next four days--and that's the best gift Santa could bring.

My mother is still in the hospital, so that requires daily visits. Work has been particularly busy for December with lots of deadlines and two hearings this week. And the kids have had concerts and plays and Girl Scout events. There has hardly been a night where I've been home before 9:00 p.m. lately.

I'm planning to spend my four days of bliss curled up with a book and a cup of coffee (Santa brought us a Keurig a few days early!), watching Christmas movies, and playing the Wii with the kids. Today we might venture out to see Hugo (we've been dying to see this movie but simply haven't had time) and may even go ice skating.

And I'm copping out and going easy for Christmas dinner. I'm going to put together a baked ziti today that we can just pop in the oven on Christmas. And I'm making making Overnight Pecan Praline Baked French Toast for Christmas morning. (I made this at Thanksgiving and it is really yummy, but 6 eggs are plenty and be sure to cut your bread thick or it will be soggy.)

We'll head to Hometown next weekend to see our families. It will be fun, but not nearly as relaxing as my four days at home (did I mention how excited I am about this?)

Finally!

2011-12-13T21:03:00.000-06:00

My mother finally had the second half of her hip replacement surgery today. The first half was August 25--we've been waiting almost 4 months. Meanwhile, she's been in a rehab facility here--400 miles from home--where I am pretty much the only person available to check in on her. (Her husband can't stay here with her because he is receiving chemotherapy treatments in Hometown.) So it was a huge relief to finally have this surgery.

Of course, it did not go as smoothly as planned. After the surgeon opened her up, he came out to tell us that he would have to replace her femur because there wasn't enough bone left to attach the hip. And in the end, she ended up getting a new knee, too, because the new femur couldn't attach to the artificial knee that was already there.

So she now has an incision from her hip to mid-calf and will be on bedrest for 7 days to allow it to hear. She'll be in the hospital for at least 10 days, instead of the originally planned 3-4. And then rehab starts all over again. We were hoping she could go home by mid-January, but who knows how long recovery will take now.

And she will eventually have to come back to have the other hip done.

This was a big step, but it still feels like a never-ending nightmare.

Finally went to the doctor today

2011-12-12T15:14:00.000-06:00

Totally not embarrassed at all when I found out I would be getting a steroid shot in my butt from a very young male nurse and I was wearing see-through purple lace undies.

Rule for life in LC's house--the sexier the undies, the longer it's been since laundry was done. I guess I should be glad it hadn't been a few more days.

Holiday Madness

2011-12-11T13:14:00.000-06:00

DH and I are cuddled up on the sofa this morning snorting and sniffling and piling up the snotty Kleenexes. How romantic!

We have been crazy busy since before Thanksgiving and there is no end in sight. Thanksgiving was great, but we had lots of company which meant little downtime. And every weekend through the end of the year is booked.

Yesterday we finally got our Christmas tree and put up outdoor lights. Until then we had not a single decoration up (kind of funny, since we had Halloween decorations up for 6 weeks thanks to PS's late-September party). It has become a yearly tradition to cut our own tree at a local tree farm, and the kids refused to give it up even it it meant waiting a while to get a tree. I'm glad we stuck with our tradition, though--it was a beautiful day yesterday and we had a great time.

But the tree is still sitting in a bucket in the garage. The twins had Caroling for Cans with their Girl Scout troop last night and DH and I attended his work party where I wore the very short dress and had a fabulous mashed potato martini (the most awesome martini evah for a carb lover). I guess today we'll be decorating indoors today.

This week the twins have their first orchestra concert, PS has a play and my mother (finger's crossed!) has her surgery. And I have about 5 work deadlines on Friday, but I think I have them all under control. And then we have symphony tickets next weekend, and more work parties and I still have some serious baking and shopping to do. Oh boy!

In other news, our family pics turned out great--especially considering that we only had about a 20 minute window to work with. In fact, we got so many good ones that I am now considering doing photo books instead of just a framed family photo for the grandparents for Christmas. Anybody have any recommendations for where to order? It looks like I can order from just about anywhere, but I have no idea how the quality among the various retailers compares. I'm also planning to order canvases, if anyone has ordered those before and can testify to the quality of a particular place.

I wish I could share them, but that would kinda kill the whole anony-blogger thing. So you just get the rear view. (DH hates this pic--he says it looks like we're off the see the Wizard.)

The best laid plans...

2011-12-04T18:23:00.000-06:00

For weeks we had our family pictures scheduled for yesterday. We wanted them before Christmas, and this was just about the only weekend we've had open since mid-October. So I had the photographer booked, scouted the perfect outdoor location, arranged to have my hair done, and shopped for coordinated but not matchy-matchy outfits.

And then I started feeling crappy. A handful of drugs and a steamy shower allowed me to feel semi-humanoid.

And then the weather turned ugly. Windy and misty--the perfect weather to ruin the fabulous hair that my stylist had just given me. My hair is naturally curly/frizzy--it does not agree with humidity.

But I already had everything booked, so we went forward. The photographer loved the location that I chose, and we were about 20 minutes in and getting great shots when the skies opened up and we all got poured on. That was the end of our session because we looked like a family of drowned rats.

She said she got some good shots, but she didn't know if there was a good family shot. Kind of a bummer since the family pic was supposed to be our Christmas gifts to our parents and grandparents.
We never got to a grouping of just the kids, but she got lots of individual pics of each.

She sent me 4 pics tonight--the group shots weren't great (it's always a challenge getting 5 people to look good at the same time), but there was a good one of DH and me and she said there were several more really good couple shots. So I guess not all is lost. I hate having my picture made, so there are very few pictures of me in existence, and DH and I haven't had a picture together since we were engaged--so over 16 years ago!

I can't wait to see the rest. Hopefully she got some good individual shots of the kids.

Oops

2011-11-21T20:03:00.000-06:00

So I ordered this super-cute dress from Dorothy Perkins to wear to DH's work party. I've never ordered from that site before, but they were running a sale when I ordered and the price was worth the risk that the dress wouldn't fit.

It finally showed up today, and I ripped open the package and immediately went to try it on, half expecting it to be too small. Woohoo--it fits!!!

Except that it is REALLY short. Like slutty short. Like barely covering my girlie bits better make sure I get a wax before wearing short and don't sit or bend EVER short.

Of course, the measurements were provided on the website, but I didn't bother to check the length. It didn't look short on the mannequin, and since at 5'4" I'm on the shorter side, even dresses that look short on tall, slender models are usually ok for me.

So am I going to return it?

No. Even though I think I'm a bit too old to wear a dress this short. But my legs are among my better assets, and the rest of the dress is conservative enough to offset the slutty shortness, I think. I will add black hose instead of going bare-legged, as was my original intent, though.

The quality was also better than expected for the price. To get free shipping I threw in a pair of earrings and this cute little sweater, which also seems like decent quality for the price.

My Babies are Growing Up

2011-11-17T20:58:00.000-06:00

So TT came to me last night and said that she really wanted to start shaving her legs. This kind of surprised me, since she's my tomboy. I would have expected her girlie-girl twin to ask first. But as TT pointed out, she does wear shorts a lot. (The child practically lives in soccer shorts. She's always hot, and it was still in the 80's here this week. And she does have really hairy legs.) Also, I kind of had to push PS to start shaving when she entered 7th grade, because I was afraid the other kids would make fun of her. (I was shaving well before 7th grade, but I remember skipping a week or so and then wearing a skirt and catching hell from a couple of asshole boys.)

I think I started shaving the summer before 5th grade, so this seems about right for TT. I bought her an electric shaver, like I did for her older sister. It works well enough for now, and she was excited about trying this new big girl thing. I can hear the shaver whirring away as I type.

I'm sure SS will want to jump on the hairless bandwagon now that TT has started. But Target only had one shaver on the shelf, so she'll have to wait a few days until I can get to the store again.

Poor girls, they don't realize that they've just set themselves up for a lifetime of shaving and stubble.

Meanwhile, I am seriously considering laser hair removal for my face. I swear, I'm turning into a man with a full beard and I can barely keep up with the waxing and depilatories. And believe me, fair skin and dark hair is not a good combination.

Turkey Day

2011-11-15T22:52:00.000-06:00

So I'm hosting Thanksgiving this year, for the first time since 2006 when I was still in law school and my mother-in-law was still alive. I love Thanksgiving and generally love to host, but I've had some concerns about it causing more stress this year since there has been so much going on.

FIL and his wife are coming to town. I have to admit I was more than a little relieved when I learned they would be staying in a hotel. And I just learned that SIL and her family will be coming down Black Friday. It's been a while since we saw them, and we're looking forward to hanging out with our adorable little nephews.

Fortunately, the new housekeeper is working out great, and she will be here the Tuesday and Wednesday before Thanksgiving to make sure the house is company ready. Having someone to maintain the chaos in the house has been a HUGE stress reliever. It's so much easier to relax in a clean house.

Local family is coming, too, so it looks like we will have 12 for dinner. A reasonably sized crowd, although we have had about double that before. I've already bought my turkey and all of my nonperishables, and I've been testing out new recipes. I'm going to try brining the turkey this year, and then using my regular recipe. I've never brined before, but I keep hearing that it's the best way to get a moist turkey. I guess we'll see.

And today I bought tickets for the Nutcracker for the Sunday after Thanksgiving. I have never seen it performed live. Every year I say I'm going to take the girls, but we never make it. But I got an email today with a great deal on tickets to see a well-regarded production company at our beautiful new opera house. I'm so excited! It will be so much fun to get all dressed up and have a girls day out. (DH didn't have much interest in going with us.) It will be a lovely way to wrap up our Thanksgiving weekend.

Listamania: Things I love about my kids

2011-11-12T20:33:00.001-06:00

1) They are funny. I had no idea how much I would laugh once I had kids. When they were little, they made me laugh with silly little kid antics. Now that all have witty, deadpan senses of humor.

2) They are good kids. They are well-behaved and people like them. I always get compliments from their teachers.

3) They are kind. They will stick up for someone who has been wronged. And they aren't mean girls-they are nice even to the kids who irritate them. I think the twins would be classified as popular. Of course, being a twin brings built-in popularity. EVERYWHERE we go we hear "Hi SS, Hi TT!!!"

4) They like to hang out with their family. I guess this surprises me, because I was always hiding in my room with a book. But they love it when we have family movie nights or game nights. And often, we are all hanging out in the same room, even if it means that we are all on different computers with a tv blaring in the background. I love being lumped together on the couch like a pile of puppies!

5) Each is her own person. PS won't do anything just because someone else is doing it. She could not care less that every other kid in her school lives in their Abercrombie shirts and Toms shoes. And the twins may look exactly alike, but their personalities are completely different. It is very clear which twin takes after me and which one takes after DH. One is laid-back and goes with the flow. The other is high-strung and bossy. One loves to wear dresses and jewelery and carries a purse everywhere with her blinged-out cell phone in it. The other lives in soccer shorts and the rattiest t-shirts she can dig up, and hates skirts.

Hip to Be Square

2011-11-12T08:31:00.001-06:00

Thank goodness it's the weekend. After being out of town last weekend, I feel like I have been going, going, going for two weeks now. I'm really looking forward to some downtime, although I am going to have to spend some quality time at the office at some point.

So I finally got an answer out of the doctor regarding when my mother's custom hip implant would be ready. December fucking 12. Thank you Biomet. No, they haven't given me any reasonable explanation for why it takes 3.5 MONTHS to make a custom hip implant. It is beyond ridiculous.

No, the doctor did not ever advise us at any point that it would take 3.5 months for this part to be made. We were told the second half of the surgery would be in 8 weeks--NOT 15!

I am not happy, but I don't think there's much I can do about it, at least not right now. I really believe that Biomet dropped the ball somewhere along the way. And the lack of communication from the surgeon is appalling. In typical surgeon fashion, he just wants to cut and has no interest in patient care. But by all accounts, he is the very best at this specialized surgery, so I am treading carefully so that I don't piss him off.

Meanwhile, she has run out of time on her insurance. They are telling her she needs to move out this week--just when we learn it will be another month. The rehab facility keeps asking her why she can't go home with me--and she asked me about it this week. This is an asinine question. SHE CAN'T GET OUT OF BED!!! She is completely non-weight bearing on both legs. A physical therapist or nurse has to move her from her bed to a chair on a board. She has been injured twice by professionals trying to move her. She can't transfer to a toilet. She would require in-home care at least 16 hours a day. A wheelchair won't fit through my doorways--she would be living in my living room or dining room. And for my own sanity: I already have 3 kids to take care of; I'm gone at least 12 hours a day; I'm not going to force my husband and children to take on this responsibility; I am stretched as far as I can be stretched right now moving her here would undoubtedly break me.

The uninsured per diem to remain where she is is $170/day. That's about $5000/month. I'm certain she has access to $5K, so it's not like I'm forcing her on the street by telling her that she can't stay here.

Not to mention that home care would cost close to that $170/day, if not more. And it doesn't cover room and board and food and laundry service and a full professional staff.

It was just beyond her comprehension that she might have to pay something out of pocket after she has been in rehab for 2.5 months. But after telling her that moving in with me is not an option, and breaking down the finances, I think it is getting through to her.

Boy, I wish they'd get that new hip in.

Vegas, baby

2011-11-08T08:58:00.000-06:00

So, since my blog has taken a turn for the whiny of late, I will tell you about my trip to Vegas, which was really nice and lots of fun.

I've mentioned before that I don't really love Vegas. I've been once before, and my strongest memories were of inflamed sinuses from the cigarette smoke and the whore peddlers handing out trading cards on the street. Yeah, those things were still there. The cigarette smoke is pervasive, and I felt vaguely headachey the entire time we were there because of it. I guess the good news is that it kept us out of the casinos. I'm not really a gambler anyway, but I was not inclined to spend any time sitting in a haze of smoke while losing my money.

But other than that, I really enjoyed our trip, and I think a weekend is just the right amount of time to spend there.

We stayed in the Bellagio, which is fantastic. Our room was gorgeous and I wanted to bring the entire bathroom back home with me.

We saw three shows while we were there: Love, Absinthe and Mystere. Love was really the reason for the trip and it did not disappoint. It was simply fantastic. If you are a Beatles fan it is a must-see. There was so much going on that I would go see this show again just to catch everything I missed the first time around.

I'd heard that Love is different from the typical Cirque show, and some people don't care for it because it is more about the music than the acrobatics. So we made a last minute decision to see Mystere when we found discount tickets--just so we could experience a classic Cirque show (because we had never seen any Cirque shows before this trip).

I really did not care for Mystere. I thought both of the other shows that we saw were infinitely better. I can't put my finger on why I didn't care for it. It was weird and abstract--but so was Love. The Love music was definitely better. The Mystere music felt a bit dated. There is a bit with a giant baby in Mystere that I just thought was dumb.

Finally, Absinthe. It is a fairly new show in a tent in front of Ceasar's. We had heard about it before we left and were interested but didn't know if we would have time to see it. But on our first night we were walking by and tickets were available, so we made the spontaneous decision to check it out.

Absinthe is vulgar, obscene, offensive and fantastic. We both really liked it (DH said more than LOVE--and he is the Beatles fan!--but I would probably put it right behind Love.) If you are offended by racial or sexual humor, don't see this show--it is really, really offensive to people of all races, colors and sexual orientation. And multiply the Hangover 2 by 10 to understand the obscenity. But it was really funny, and the athleticism of the performers was amazing. There was a tiny 10 foot diameter stage, and it was astonishing what the performers could accomplish there. It's also a very small venue--we were only 3 rows back--and I doubt there was a bad seat in the house. I highly recommend Absinthe, with the caveat that it is offensive and if you are sensitive you should skip it (and definitely do not take your grandmother).

Other than shows, we shopped, we ate, we wandered around. The spiked milkshakes at BLT Burger in the Mirage are definitely worth checking out, but I thought the food was mediocre. The service at Cabo Wabo in Planet Hollywood was the worst I have ever encountered anywhere. The breakfast buffet at Bellagio was eh--nothing was warm, hard to justify the price. Room service was cheaper--and I do love eating in bed in a hotel room! Didn't try any high end restaurants--fancy food is not really out thing.

I'm glad to be back home and I think I can wait another 8 years to go back. By Sunday afternoon , we were both kind of bored. But I'm glad we went--it was a much needed, relaxing weekend.

My Life is a Roller Coaster a/k/a All Hell is Breaking Loose...Again

2011-11-07T21:06:00.000-06:00

I got up at 5:45 this morning to make my 8:45 flight back home from Vegas (DH is there until Wednesday for his conference). Made it to my office by 2:30. At 3:45 TT texted me that she had a fever and wasn't feeling well. At 4:00 the power went out in my building, so by 4:30 I had packed up and was heading home.

Got home and rechecked the kid's temp. Yep, definitely a fever. Got online for web check-in at urgent care. Then PS told me that there was a hole in the fence and they had to supervise Bob every time he goes outside. So I went to fix the fence while I waited for urgent care to call back with my appointment time.

I totally suck at fixing fences. I broke at least 5 nails in half, bent about 8 more, and it took me entirely too long to replace two pickets. I was cursing DH for leaving me with this crappy fence (that we are about to replace, we are just waiting for his dad to bring down a nail gun at Thanksgiving), but I eventually got the job done. Then realized an hour had passed and urgent care had never called. Called them, they had no record of my web check in, but said to come on down.

Of course we had to wait 30 minutes to be seen. Doc confirmed strep (no surprise, since SS had strep a week ago) and gave us a prescription for a Z-pack. Meanwhile, huge thunderstorms rolled in. Because DH is still in Vegas, PS and SS were home alone and I was worried that they would get scared or the power would go out, but neither would answer their phones!

I headed to Kroger in the pouring rain to get the scrip filled and yelled at the punk high school who whipped around in front of me to turn into the opposite slanted parking spot (the one that was slanted in my direction).

Inside I found that Kroger had just had a power surge and most of their computers weren't working. They couldn't process my insurance or my credit card. But Kroger awesomely estimated my insurance payment (and I know it was right because I got the same scrip for TT last week) and I, fortunately, had cash on hand.

Headed out and stopped by Sonic per TT's request for a milkshake. Her sisters finally called back and proclaimed they were starving (it was 8:00 by then and I hadn't made dinner yet). Ordered dinner and then realized that my wallet was nowhere to be found. Frantically called the pharmacy which confirmed that they had my wallet. And, since I have a habit of sticking cash in the various nooks and crannies of my giant Mary Poppins bag, I had enough to cover the food I had just ordered.

Left Sonic and headed back to Kroger. TT said, "hey, did you get my shake?" No, I forgot all about the shake--the whole purpose of going to Sonic for my poor sick girl with a sore throat.

Back to Kroger for my wallet, then back to Sonic for the shake. Finally made it back home at 8:30, exhausted.

Texted housekeeper to see if she could come in early and stay with TT tomorrow (if she was even willing to deal with sick kid) but she is sick, too. I need to go to work tomorrow, since I only worked a couple of hours on Friday and Monday, but it doesn't look like it's meant to be.

in less chaotic news, all of my crises from last week resolved themselves. The dishwasher did turn out to be related to the garbage disposal (no, I didn't say " I told you so" but I did say " you should listen to your wife, there are people who pay lots of money for her opinion.") And Friday afternoon the court granted my motion to continue the hearing that was set for tomorrow. And I quashed all of my upcoming depositions except one in response to a pleading filed by an opposing party on Thursday--so my schedule for the next two weeks pretty much cleared out.

Lets hope life stays calm at least until Thursday when DH is back and can help out. I am a wee bit bitter that he is still living it up in Vegas while I am back to the circus that is our life.

Bitchfest

2011-11-02T21:37:00.000-06:00

I am feeling like a rubber band that just keeps getting stretched farther and farther. You can see the cracks developing and you know its gonna break, it's just a matter of when.

Today PS texted me, "There is water spewing from the thing at the top of the sink and it is getting on the hardwoods." Grrr-eat! Fortunately, she's a smart girl and knew that was a vent for the dishwasher, so she turned off the dishwasher and cleaned up the mess before it ruined the floor.

Two days ago I looked under the kitchen sink and noticed it smelled musty. Upon further inspection I found that the garbage disposal was dripping nasty water and there was quite a puddle and a couple of inches of putrid water in a vase that happened to be conveniently placed.

DH replaced the garbage disposal last night so I figured that today's issue was probably related to his installation. He vehemently disagreed, and I honestly can't see the connection between the dishwasher and the garbage disposal when I look at the pipes under the sink, so I guess he's off the hook. Except that he's still the one who gets to figure out what the heck is going on with the dishwasher.And during his inspection tonight he accidentally pulled loose a hose and backed-up water flooded my kitchen and the hardwoods in the connected living room.

And this is all most inconveniently timed. We are both leaving for Vegas on Friday. My brother is coming down to visit our mother and look after my girls. I do not want to leave him in a house with an f'd up dishwasher or garbage disposal. I also don't want to go buy a dishwasher because it would come out of my Vegas money. And I don't really have the time to deal with any of this. Arrrghhhh!

This stupid trip is causing more stress than it's worth. If it wasn't nonrefundably paid for I think I'd cancel.

I return early Monday afternoon so that I can get in a half day's work. I have a hearing* on Tuesday, depositions on Wednesday and Thursday, a full day client meeting to prepare for his deposition the following Monday, followed my more depositions the next Wednesday and Thursday. Meanwhile, DH is out of town until Wednesday night--and PS has a play Wednesday night.

Two different named partners have had me on two different monster memos for the last week and a half, so I haven't had time to prepare for anything coming up in the next two weeks.

And yesterday I started working on an MSJ and Shepardizing a recent MSJ on the same topic when I found that the state supreme court issued an opinion last week that overturned existing law and completely obliterated the affirmative defense that was the basis of my MSJ. This case is specific to the industry in which 99% of my firm's practice is based and has significant ramifications for most of our clients. So I took it upon myself to brief the opinion and send it out to all of my partners.

Do I get a "Wow, thanks LC. It's a good thing you told us about this case cuz its pretty important to our clients." Um, no (because I don't live in a fairy tale world where partners actually say thank you). I get, "Did you add this memo to our research database? What search terms did you use? (Economic loss because its about the economic loss rule, duh!) You know it's important to guess which search terms other people might use and not just enter the terms that come logically to you. (So, I'm supposed to use my Spidey-sense to know what random ass search term you are going to enter when you are looking for that supreme court case on the economic loss rule?)" I was fine without a thank you, but that conversation irritated me.

And then I got, "By the way, please send me the contact information for all of the attorneys who handled that case." That REALLY irritated me. Because a secretary totally couldn't do that, right? It took an enormous amount of self-control not to pop off with a smart ass comment that probably would have gotten me fired.

Maybe I'm just being overly sensitive because I'm stressed. I've been on the verge of tears a lot lately. That's not really my thing. I definitely need more control over my life.

*And by hearing, I mean a trial on appeal from an administrative decision. So I have to put on witnesses and introduce evidence and pick a jury. I have a pending motion for continuance, but the court hasn't ruled yet.

Listamania: These are a few of my favorite things

2011-11-02T08:00:00.003-06:00

No, I'm not naming my husband and kids--we already know they are my favorite things. This list is a little more shallow than that.

1) 80's sitcoms. My fave's are Growing Pains, Who's the Boss and Family Ties. I think those are indicative of my crappy childhood and the fact that I loved watching the idyllic perfect families. (Although, oddly, the Cosby Show was never one of my faves). Other favorites are Facts of Life and Golden Girls. My freshman year of college all of my dormmates used to watch Golden Girls and Designing Women every night.

2) My new super comfy blanket from Costco. I'm not sure DH loves it, though, since I won't share with him.

3) Cinnamon Roll Cake. Seriously the best cake I have ever made.

4) Margaritas. Pretty much the only cocktail I ever order.

5) Fantastic shoes. I have a boring, conservative work wardrobe, but I love spicing it up with great shoes.

6) Traveling. We never took vacations as a kid, and I love getting to explore new places and the extra time with my family.

7) Snuggling on the couch with my cozy blanket and a good book on a dreary day.

Happy Halloween!

2011-10-31T20:08:00.000-06:00

From my creepy creatures to yours!

Listamania: Rules for Life

2011-10-27T20:00:00.002-06:00

1) Always be nice to everyone. Especially the people who seem to need it the most. You never know what someone else is going through.

2) Always convert to pdf, unless you are making a conscientious decision not to. It just makes life easier on everybody.

3) If you have to qualify your statement(e.g. not to be rude, but...) you probably need to rethink whether that statement really needs to be made.

4) Never let a man hit you. The first time should be the last time.

5) Never depend on a man to take care of you. Be able to take care of yourself. (This one came from my 80 year old great-grandmother when I was in high school.)

The Most Dreaded Word an Associate Can Hear from a Partner

2011-10-27T18:44:00.001-06:00

"I know there's a case..."

And thus begins the chase for the ethereal case that may or may not actually exist and definitely will not exist in the jurisdiction that the partner is certain it hails from.

Oh boy

2011-10-24T19:30:00.000-06:00

Thank goodness I had a nice, relaxing weekend to prepare for today.

My day started with an emergency research project that I was happy to get. I like research and haven't done much lately.

And then my mother's doctor's office called to let us know that her surgery is indefinitely postponed because the custom implant that is being made for her is not ready yet. What??? Nobody told us this two weeks ago when you scheduled her surgery and then sent us to the hospital for pre-admission where they dropped her and broke her femur. (It turned out that the fracture was not a cause to delay the surgery, but she had a urinary tract infection that delayed it for a week-or so we thought.) Apparently there is a backlog on custom hip implants right now, and hers was especially complicated.

It could be another month before the implant is ready. Which means another month in rehab. And it also puts the scheduling of the next surgery in a very hairy time for me. I have about a zillion depositions and a couple of hearings in November. And my firm has a huge trial starting January 3rd--I'm not on that trial team, but because we are a small firm I am definitely feeling the effects.

And as soon as I got off the phone with the doc, I saw about 5 missed calls on my cell. Apparently SS started running a fever at school, and DH had to go get her. Looks like strep. She will be out again tomorrow, so DH and I will have to paper-scissors-rock to see who gets to stay home. But I loaded up all of my research, just in case. This week, at least, I don't have a lot going on and research projects are pretty portable.

And I talked to my brother, who is coming in down in 2 weeks when DH and I go to Vegas. This trip was planned months ago--long before my mother's surgeries. He is being sent to a convention by his employer. We decided to take advantage of the subsidized airfare and hotel and fly in the weekend before for a quick getaway. But right now this getaway is just causing more stress.

I kind of thought I would have to cancel when my mother's issues popped up--but then my brother mentioned that he was thinking of coming down that weekend. I talked him into watching my kids in exchange for gas and groceries, and it seemed too perfect not to go forward. Someone will be here if anything comes with out mother, and I still get to take my already paid for trip.

But he will have his 4 plus my 3 girls to deal with--ages 15, 14, 13(2), 10(2) and 8. The good news is that he teaches middle school, so he is used to dealing with lots of screaming teenagers--and all of out kids are pretty easy to deal with. But I may have to send him on his own trip to Vegas after that!

Nice Weekend

2011-10-23T19:42:00.000-06:00

This was the most stress-less weekend we have had in a while, and it was nice. I feel so much more ready for Monday than I usually do.

Saturday I interviewed a housekeeper, and I plan to offer her the position as long as her references come back ok. She is already working part-time for another attorney, so she would just alternate days working for the two of us. I really liked her, and I really hope this works out. I think controlling the chaos in my house is a big step toward controlling the feeling of constant chaos in my life.

After I finished up the interview we went to the library and the pumpkin patch where we loaded up on way too many books and picked out a family of pumpkins to carve next weekend. And (bonus!) the worker there was incredulous that DH and I could be old enough to be the parents of out kids.

That evening, out former nanny came by for a visit. She left for college in the fall, and we were so sad to see her go. The kids were thrilled to see her again, and it was a really nice visit.

We ended the day watching baseball, while I sewed Girl Scout patches. 56 badges and patches, to be exact. PS said, "well, maybe now you will keep up with sewing the badges on." Thanks a lot! But I have been a slacker--we've had most of these for a long time. However, I did find it ironic that I was sewing on the twins' sewing badges. (But the badges are all circular and the invisible thread was a PITA to work with, so I don't think they could have handled it.)

Today I slept in until 9--that never, ever happens. It is almost physically impossible for me to sleep past 7. I arose to find DH and the twins sprawled out all over the living room reading books. And so I joined them, and that is where we stayed for the next couple of hours.

We eventually wandered upstairs, where I continued with the badge sewing while watching the old and new versions of Charlie/Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. We all just kind of hung out in the game room, watching movies we've all seen about a thousand times and playing on our computers. It was nice.

We totally skipped visiting my mother this weekend. She called on Friday and offered a "free pass" for the weekend. I didn't really think she meant it, and wasn't really planning on taking her up on it, but it was so nice to not have to go anywhere today.

Now I'm ready for another week.

Lawyer Happiness

2011-10-19T15:29:00.000-06:00

I spent all morning in a difficult, technical deposition of a professional expert. The expert is an engineer and the questions involved complex mathematical concepts well-beyond my remedial math capabilities. I insisted that my client, also an engineer, be present for this deposition so that he could assist if the deponent got too technical with his answers. Which also means that the client was present to critique my skill as a lawyer and my understanding of these technical concepts.

So it really made my day when I got home and found an email from my client telling me that I did a great job today. Compliments are few and far between from paying clients, and this one in particular is the curmudgeonly sort. Plus, when he hired me he told me that he was deciding between our firm and another lawyer who is also an engineer. I assured him that even though I wasn't an engineer I could handle the job, and it was nice to be able to prove it.

Seriously???

2011-10-13T20:02:00.000-06:00

My mother is still wheelchair bound and still in rehab. She cannot stand at all. The only way she can transfer from her bed to the wheelchair is by sliding on a board. Getting her from one place to another is no easy task. Neither are bathroom activities. There is no way that someone who is not properly trained can move her at all.

Yesterday I accompanied my mother to visit her doctor for a check up and to schedule her surgery. Of course, they wanted to take a take an x-ray. It was a major ordeal that took three nurses to move her from the wheelchair to the x-ray table and back again.

The x-ray revealed that the temporary spacer was out of socket. This seemed like not a good thing, but the PA didn't seem too concerned since it was only a temporary part and she wasn't supposed to be putting weight on it anyway.

So we scheduled her surgery for next Tuesday, which made us both happy. (Yes, she is driving me crazy, but that's another post.) She should be able to go home a couple of weeks after the surgery.

Today we went to the hospital for pre-registration and to get her labs done. One of the labs ordered was a urinalysis. This presented a problem, because she cannot transfer from her wheelchair to a toilet. I asked if the urinalysis was really necessary. The nurse called the doctor's office, which confirmed that they needed the urinalysis. The nurses discussed how they were going to get this sample. A catheter was discussed, but they didn't have an order for a catheter. So they asked my mother if she thought she could transfer onto a toilet with help. She said she would rather try that than a catheter.

And so the two nurses carried her into another room, and I waited right outside. After a few minutes I heard her scream. And a couple minutes later they brought her out crying. She said that they had shifted all of her weight onto her bad leg and that it really hurt. I had no doubt that it hurt since the hip wasn't in the socket. But they were done with her, so I took her outside to be picked up by the transport service. She seemed ok by the time she left, and I headed on to the office.

She called a couple of hours later in tears, saying that the pain was excruciating and the nurse at the rehab facility wanted to talk to me. The nurse asked me to come in and sign a statement about what happened at the hospital. I refused--it was clear they were in CYA mode, and I felt no obligation to help them--particularly since she was in their care when her hip was knocked out of socket.

She called again mid-afternoon to tell me her pain meds had kicked in and she was feeling better. But the rehab facility had done x-rays and her femur is broken. WTF? I did not see this coming. I was sure the pain was because the hip was out of socket. The damn hip replacement that she is supposed to have installed on Tuesday is attached to the femur!!! I have no idea what this means for her surgery. Of course, the rehab facility couldn't reach her doctor by the time they figured all of this out, but they are going to try to get her an appointment first thing in the morning.

And , of course, she is looking to me for answers. But I told her that if I go lawyer on the doctor and hospital there is no way they're going to touch her again, and she really needs this surgery. Her doctor is supposed to be the best in this area at this specialized hip replacement--that's why she's here, she couldn't find anybody in Hometown who would do the surgery.

I'm not sure how to proceed at this point. First, I want to hear from her doctor. But if her surgery is delayed, I think the hospital sure as hell needs to be picking up the tab for the extra days in rehab. With some mental anguish thrown in. And I think the doctor bears some responsibility for demanding a probably unnecessary test without properly considering her mobility issues.

I guess we'll just see what tomorrow brings. But I'm anticipating that the surgeon won't do the hip replacement until the femur heals, which could mean several extra weeks in rehab. We might be needing a plaintiff's lawyer--although with the tort reform laws in my state, it's hard to find someone who will take a med mal case.

Listamania: Things that irritate me

2011-10-13T08:00:00.001-06:00

1) Smokers. Especially those who throw their butts out their car windows. And the ones who smoke in the car with their kids. And the ones who smoke in places that force me to walk through their cloud of carcinogens to get wherever I am going.

2) Left Lane Squatters. The left lane is for passing. If you're not passing anybody, get the Hell out of the way.

3) Able-bodied people who take the elevator up one level. Really, you probably need the exercise anyway.

4) Able-bodied people who block the flow of traffic in a parking lot so that they can park 10 feet from the door. See No. 3, above.

5) Costco. I love Costco, but the fact that you have to have a card to get into their super-secret club is stupid. And when you go to check out and they ask you if you have your card. What the hell do they think? I had to have the damn card to get in the damn door. And when receipt checker comments on the things in my cart. What if I have something embarrassing in there? I would really prefer she act ambivalent about what's in my cart. Today, the receipt-checker felt up the super-soft blanket that I bought. Don't feel up my blankie--it's creepy!

The Tooth Fairy

2011-10-09T08:42:00.000-06:00

This morning a very sad TT came downstairs to tell us that the Tooth Fairy did not come last night. She still had her tooth and she didn't have any money. Oops. DH and I both completely forgot. She lost the tooth while at PS's robotics competition yesterday afternoon, so there was a lot going on, and she didn't say much more about it the rest of the day. But still, parent fail.

And my kids are too old and too smart to believe in the Tooth Fairy. I told TT this morning that maybe the Tooth Fairy hid the money in her room and she needed to clean her room to find her money. She replied that I was just trying to trick her into cleaning her room.

I am 100% sure that they do not actually believe in the Tooth Fairy. But we still pretend that they do. TT was bummed this morning, and I really just wanted to hand over a dollar and tell her to move on. But I didn't--instead I made up excuses for the Tooth Fairy. I'm not sure why. I guess because I felt like we sold out Santa too early with PS. When she was about 7 she asked point blank about Santa. I didn't want to lie to her, so I told her. I really wish I had fibbed and let her hold onto the Santa magic a little bit longer.

I have no intention about coming clean about Santa to the twins. (Yeah, I know they've figured him out, too--but Santa make Christmas fun, and he brings gifts that mom would never buy.). But the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny--I would be ok if they would hop on along their merry way.

Sickie McSickerson

2011-10-07T08:04:00.000-06:00

So the school called yesterday to inform me that TT had vomited and that I needed to retrieve her. The nurse said that there was a virus going around ad it looked like TT had it. She looked terrible when I picked her up, but there was no more vomiting and she perked up within a couple of hours. But the rule is that you can't return to school for 24 hours after you barf, so despite the fact that TT is exhibiting no evidence of yesterday's ailment, we are home again today.

And SS awoke complaining of a headache and a stomachache. She wasn't acting very sick, but I erred on the side of not exposing anyone else to the alleged virus and allowed her to stay home, too.

Now they are both acting perfectly fine and making demands under the guise of being sick. "Mommy, will you make me pancakes?" "Mommy, will you bring me a glass of water." "Mommy, will you turn the light on?" "Mommy, can you find the remote?" And I am accommodating them and appreciating this bit of stolen time with my girlies.

But I am going to make them do their homework in a little bit.

Listamania: Things I love about fall

2011-10-06T08:00:00.007-06:00

I'm trying something new and different--a weekly post called Listamania. It will be a list (duh) based on whatever topic pops into my head.

1) Cooler weather

2) Carving Pumpkins

3) Roasting pumpkin seeds

4) Thanksgiving--the best holiday!

5) Wearing sweaters and boots

6) Football (but only my teams and preferably live)

7) Cooking big pots of soup, pot roasts and chicken pot pie (I am very seasonal with food and don't eat any of these things when it's hot outside)

8) Snuggling under the covers during cool fall nights

9) Honeycrisp apples

Listamania: Things I want

2011-10-04T20:00:00.001-06:00

In no particular order and with no deep, meaningful issues (like world peace) considered:

1) A custom header for my blog.

2) This skirt. Oh yes, in pink.

3) A tummy tuck. I've given birth to twins--enough said.

4) Less chaos in my life.

5) My job, but where I get home in time to pick my girls up from school and cook dinner. And where I have time to take all the vacations I want. But I don't want to be a mommy-tracker or a part-timer.

6) Magical cleaning fairies. I'm trying to hire a housekeeper, but so far the hunt isn't going very well.

7) For all of my student loans to be paid off.

8) The new iphone--kinda. I need a new phone, but I'm waiting to see the consensus on the 4S before ordering.

9) To lose 20 (cough30cough) pounds.

10) A shorter commute. 25 miles of city traffic each way sucks--but I have no choice if I want affordable housing and good schools. But I swear, when my kids grow up I'm going to live in a loft in the city.

Zombies

2011-10-03T22:07:00.001-06:00

At PS's request we visited the temporary Halloween shop that recently opened. We visited when we were shopping for PS's part, but it had just opened and wasn't really set up yet. On this visit, they were all ready for Halloween. The store was fully stocked and there were creepy scenes set up everywhere. The centerpiece was a merry-go-round filled with zombie babies. At the back of the store were plenty of full-size zombies that moved and made noise and lit up. And then there was a half-body being eaten by a giant rat with accompanying sounds and movement. Yeah, it was disgusting.

But it was all pretend in a well-lit store full of people in the middle of the day. So we laughed at the zombies and moved along.

And then last night TT came into our room twice because she couldn't sleep. She can't stop thinking about the zombies. And tonight she has been out of bed three times and is currently in my bed. Oh boy.

TT is our most sensitive kid. The movie Coraline also gave her nightmares (one of PS's favorites!), so we are careful about what she is allowed to watch. And she frequently had night terrors when she was very young. But I did not realize that visiting the Halloween store was going to freak her out. I was more worried about her seeing the giant penis costume than the zombies.

Not sure how to fix this one.

Fatness

2011-10-02T21:33:00.000-06:00

I seem to be getting fatter. I am not happy about this. Last winter I started gaining weight when I was exceptionally busy at work. I was working lots of late nights, and eating crappy fast food on the way home from work. After gaining 10 pounds, I brought those bad habits to a screeching halt. I did nutrisystem for about 6 weeks, lost the weight I had gained, and reformed my eating habits.

I pretty much gave up soft drinks--down from a daily habit to maybe once a week. I drink water or iced tea. I pretty much gave up french fries. They are now an occasional treat (although I met DH for lunch on Friday at a place that has fries drizzled with olive oil and rosemary, O.M.G!) I no longer eat fast food at 9:00 at night--I keep food at work for late nights or I wait until I get home. My freezer is stocked with food, so that our eating out in general is greatly reduced. I make sure I have protein for breakfast, which makes me feel fuller so I don't eat bad carby crap. I take fruit to work every day for a mid-afternoon snack instead of relying on the carby crap that is stocked in our kitchen.

And yet, I am getting fatter again. WTF? So much for small lifestyle changes making a difference. I guess I need to start keeping a food diary, but it is so much work. Grumble.

I Am the Queen of Cool

2011-09-28T21:31:00.000-06:00

DH went for a run tonight and I went along on his bike. It was dark when we left (because it was 99 here today). Of course I can cover a lot more ground on a bike than he can on foot, so every once in a while I would loop around a block and then catch back up with him.

So he was running down a long road, and I did a loop and then did not see him when I came back to the road. Finally I caught a glimpse of his iPod bouncing along a couple hundred feet away. He had turned at the end of the road and was headed back toward me. So I looped around behind him and caught up even to him while he puffed along. I was kind of surprised he didn't say anything, and I sustained my trash talking (ahem, personal training) because there were a couple of walkers just a few feet away. So I just kept pace with him for a couple of minutes, moving so slowly on the bike I was barely staying upright.

Then he looked over at me. And I realized that the guy in the white shirt and black shorts with an iPod in an armband was not my husband. Oh crap! I took off pedaling as fast as I could without saying a word! I was mortified, and the poor guy probably thinks I'm some crazy stalker-biker lady.

And then I could not find my real DH after that. I rolled around the neighborhood for a while (praying I didn't run into the DH doppelganger again) eventually just headed home so I could call DH and explain why I abandoned him.

Teenagers

2011-09-26T21:49:00.000-06:00

I'm having trouble believing that I am now the mom of a teenager. I don't feel old enough to have a teenager.

As much as I would like to get away from the birthday parties, the benefit is that it gives me the opportunity to spend some time with the kids' friends. I really like the group of friends that she has developed over the last couple of years. There were only a couple of carry-overs from elementary school--most were newly found when she started middle school last year.And there were definitely a couple from elementary school that I wasn't sad to see drift away. But the girls she hangs out with now all seem like genuinely good kids (and I guess they are, every single one of them was inducted into the National Junior Honor Society along with PS tonight). There was no drama or over-the-top craziness at her party. Everyone got along and seemed to have a really good time.

But even among her friends, PS is different. They are all still giggly girls who squeal and hug and play with each other's hair and smush together like puppies on the sofa. That is so not PS. No squealing, no smushing, definitely no hair touching (last year, when she was in cheer, she often complained, "Mom, the cheerleaders keep trying to fix my hair.") She is physically smaller than the rest of them--several inches shorter than most. And they have all started developing while she is not. At all. She doesn't wear make-up or flat iron her hair like the rest. (Is all this because I let her skip a grade and she is the youngest? Maybe. But I think she would still be among the smallest. And I had no hint of boobs until I turned 16.) But she seems to be doing ok socially, even if she is the most restrained and self-conscious in her group. And I am a-ok with her looking younger if it keeps the boy issues at bay for a while. (Although we did have a boy at the party! Just one--a friend of the entire group. Definitely no romance issues that I could detect.)

But boy, when I see other kids her age, I start to freak out a little. At the NJHS induction tonight, several of her classmates looked and dressed like college students. A few had on skin-tight skirts that barely covered their naughty bits and left me wondering what on earth their mothers were thinking. Several more were wearing heels (that they did not know how to walk in.) They just all looked to grown up. And then there was tiny PS.

It will be interesting to see how she changes over the next couple of years. Will she always be one of those girls who's just not into hair and makeup--or will she grown into it? And how different will her sisters be? They are definitely more the huggy, squealy, puppy piling types.

Today I Don't Feel Like Doing Anything...

2011-09-25T09:58:00.000-06:00

This was an exceptionally busy week. I had a hearing on Tuesday and a mediation of Friday (my first solo!) and in between my bosses were demanding deadlines on new projects by the end of the week--which made for some very late nights for me. Everyone in the office was swamped and the Big Bosses were becoming visibly agitated at having to compete with one another for assistance with their matters.

On Tuesday the moved my mother, which was definitely a positive thing, but I had to work in a couple of trips to bring her new things that she needed, which added to the chaos.

And then there was PS's birthday and the party. Lesson learned: never try to plan a murder mystery party in two weeks. Especially when you have an unpredictable job that could explode at any moment. I had gone shopping the weekend before, but I had to do pretty much everything else on Friday night and Saturday morning. It was A LOT of work.

I had originally planned to try to make a cake, or, more specifically cake pops, in a shore fit of lunacy in which I forgot that I am completely incapable of decorating anything. My test batch of cake pops last weekend were too wet so they wouldn't stay on the stick and looked like delicious little balls of bird gak.

By Friday it was crystal clear that there was no way in heck I was going to be baking anything, and I had resigned myself to picking up a cake from Costco. But then a friend called and I was venting about how much I had to do and she said, "I can help! Just let me know what you need. I can come over, I can do food, I can do the cake." (I have given this friend a lot of free legal services lately, and I think she really wanted a way to pay me back.)

And so I said, "Can you make a Jack Skellington cake?" Thinking something like this:

And she made the most awesome Jack Skellington cake I have ever seen that must have taken more hours than I can possibly imagine:

Yay! She was a huge life saver!

And then about 5:00 Friday night, my brother called to tell me he decided to come down. He was originally coming this weekend, and then he called last week to say he couldn't and then he called Friday night to say he changed his mind again. So that added to the chaos a bit more.

Saturday morning, DH drove PS to a robotics competition 45 miles away, so I didn't have them to help out. My brother went to see my mom, but at least he took all of the other kids with him, so they weren't underfoot while I was cooking and cleaning and decorating and costume making and murder mystery clue assembling.

I don't know how we managed, but somehow we pulled it all off. The house looked hauntingly awesome, the kids managed their own make-up for their costumes, the food came together, and all of the kids claimed to have a great time.

Since it was a murder mystery party, DH made a backdrop for mug shots to take all of the kids pics as they arrived. We had prints made while the mystery was being unraveled and gave all of the kids a book of their mug shots as party favors:

The party was a success, and I am exhausted. I swear I'm going to spend the entire day in my PJ's catching up on the new television shows that start this week. Definitely time to recharge.

Slutty Sailors and Mad Scientists

2011-09-20T21:52:00.000-06:00

So, I totally spoke too soon with my last post. Being away from the office for a day put me behind on everything, and all hell broke loose as soon as I returned.

Advice for young attorneys: don't count your settlements before they hatch. Cases I though were all wrapped up started unraveling, parties started defaulting on already settled cases, clients I haven't heard from in months suddenly needed me, and Big Boss started bringing me in on a big case that is suddenly moving very fast. And I had two deadlines that I had uncharacteristically procrastinated on meeting to deal with.

Oh yes, and in the middle of it all, my mother's case manager informed me that they were planning to move her this week to another care facility. It's a long, convoluted explanation about insurance. The new facility is a lower level of care (not acute care, where she has been), which is where I wanted to put her in the first place, but was told she could not for a multitude of reasons that do not appear to me to have been resolved. But it seems like change will be a good thing, so I didn't really fight it.

They also decided, without consulting me, that the move would be today. I had a hearing today*, so she was on her own for the move.

We visited last weekend so that we could un-decorate and bring back all of the stuff that she had accumulated in anticipation of the move. My aunt stopped in while we were there and told me that she thinks my mother is taking advantage of me because she is suddenly getting my attention after we have barely spoken for 5 years. It was nice feel validated by someone who knows our history. And hopefully it will make me feel less guilty when I don't have time to visit.

And, of course, in the middle of everything else, I am frantically trying to pull together PS's party. Her character in the murder mystery is a mad scientist, and we have been looking everywhere for a reasonably-priced lab coat (I don't have time to order online without paying ridiculous expedited shipping charges). The ones at the costume shop that just opened all have "clever" names on the breast pocket like "Dr. Howie Feltersnatch" and "Dr. Seymore Bush." Totally appropriate for a bunch of 13-year olds.

But I eventually found a slutty sailor costume on clearance (a short white dress with buttons) that I decided I could hack into a lab coat by shortening the sleeves and hem and repositioning the buttons. We'll just splatter it with a little blood and be all set.

*The hearing totally sucked. It was an administrative hearing--where a government agency gets to make up its own rules, not publish them anywhere, and apply them as it sees fit. The agency had taken a default after failing to provide notice of a previous hearing. Their position was that the agency is not required to provide notice of a hearing. Um, seriously? Thankfully, we are entitled to appeal and get a trial de novo in a real court.

Sickness and Murder

2011-09-13T10:28:00.000-06:00

I am home with a sick kid today. It's amazing how the child, who with tears in her eyes insisted that her throat hurt too much and she felt too bad to go to school, was miraculously healed enough to go play Mario Kart the moment I told her she didn't have to go to school. And she just scarfed down the omelet I made for her and rewarded me with an enthusiastic "this is delicious!"

So in hindsight, it seems like she could have made it through school, but I guess we'll get a mommy/daughter day instead. Fortunately, today is a convenient day to be out of the office. The summer was painfully slow at work, and this month has picked up only a slightly steadier pace. The extended slowness is always a concern, but it is well timed for the crises in my personal life.

The issues with my mother are holding. She is settled into the long-term care facility where, hopefully, she will stay until her next surgery. It is literally a two-minute drive from my office. The case manager mentioned that they would like to move her to another facility with a lower level of care (not acute) for insurance purposes, but I don't see that really happening as she is still completely bedridden.

She has made comments to my brother that she doesn't see very much of me. But I have been there nearly every day since she was admitted. On the days I wasn't there, someone else visited. There have only been one or two days that she has had no visitors. And I have taken her every, single thing she has asked for (with little thanks for it). Fortunately, I have moved past the point in my life where I need her approval.

In other news, plans for PS's murder mystery party are well under way. We are having lots of fun planning menus and decorations. Our murder mystery is set in a haunted house, so we can go all Halloweeney. (Yes, it is a little early for a Halloween theme, but PS is a bit goth and somehow always manages to bring a bit of Halloween into her birthday parties.)

And my brother is planning to come down the same weekend to visit our mother. PS is super excited that her cousins may get to attend her party. I am too, but also a bit overwhelmed at hosting a party and house guests at the same time.

Where I Was on 9/11

2011-09-11T09:15:00.000-06:00

The twins were about 6 weeks old. DH had left for work and I was dozing with the babies when he called and said, "Turn on the tv. They are saying on the radio that a plane just hit the World Trade Center."

And I said, "You must have misheard. That isn't possible." It was just so preposterous.

I turned on the television in our bedroom and confirmed that DH had not misheard. I was watching as the second plane hit the second tower and was glued to the television for the rest of the day as the whole horrible scenario unfolded.

PS was not-quite three, and I remember putting the living room television on Blue's Clues and being oh so thankful that Nickelodeon was not interrupting its programming. I stayed huddled in my bedroom with my infant twins, crying and wondering what kind of world I had just brought these babies into.

PS was surprisingly content to watch tv all day--maybe because we had strict limitations on how much television she was allowed to watch, or maybe because she sensed that something was wrong. The twins also seemed particularly easy to deal with that day.

Watching the memorial coverage this morning is hard. Especially when they showed the segments about the kids who lost their parents. And the kids who never knew their fathers. Those kids are about the age of my twins and I can't imagine how different their lives would be if they never knew their dad.

Party Time

2011-09-08T17:51:00.000-06:00

PS's birthday is three weeks away and her friends have started asking if she's going to have a party because last year's party was so much fun. One of them said that it would be really tough to top last year's scavenger hunt party, and I think she's right, so PS and I have been brainstorming for another awesome party idea.

I think we've decided upon a murder mystery party. When she floated the idea to her friends today they agreed that it sounded "awesome." I've never been to a murder mystery party before, but it always sounded like lots of fun.

Now our challenge is just to find one that is teen appropriate. There are a ton of places online to download kits, but they are all on websites that look like they were made in someone's basement in 1995, so I'm a bit hesitant to order.

So readers, has anyone bought a downloadable murder-mystery kit that you recommend? Or have you played one of the boxed games? Any party tips?

Chaos Continues

2011-08-30T20:30:00.000-06:00

Exhaustion is setting in. I'm stressed and cranky.

I visited two nursing homes this morning and still made it to work by 9:30.

Had a completely unproductive day. But at least all my bosses were out, so there was no one around to harass me.

Left the office at 3:45 to get my mother transferred to the long term care facility. Stopped along to way to drown my troubles in very bad food. Fries and a chocolate shake from McDonalds. There is just something about the hot, salty, carbyness of the fries combined with the cold sweetness of the shake that makes life a little better. And yes, I have been known to dip my fries in the shake. My kids do this, too. Yum!

Got her all set up and told her at 6:45 that I had to leave to make Back-to-School Night for the twins. She said, "Wait! I have to see if I can get online. I'm supposed to play poker with my friends online tonight." Because poker is so much more important than meeting the kids' teachers.

So I pulled out her little netbook and tried unsuccessfully to get an internet connection. I told her she was going to have to ask her nurse if they had a wi-fi password because I had to go.

Finally left at 7:00, and she was irritated that I hadn't figured out how to get an internet connection.

Drove 80 mph all the way home and made it to the school at 7:30 exactly. Spent the next hour and fifteen minutes touring the twins' classes while simultaneously texting PS instructions for uploading pictures that she has to have printed tonight for a homework project (of course, she couldn't have bothered to get this done before the deadline and I haven't been home to nag her).

Finally home, twins getting ready for bed, DH still helping PS with homework. Need to go pick up PS's prints--was going to beg DH to do it, but he is knee deep in math homework that I am not smart enough to help with.

Really just want to go to bed.

DH is even more awesome than I realized

2011-08-29T21:05:00.000-06:00

a/k/a Today REALLY Sucked

Dropped the kiddos off at school and headed to the hospital. My mother wasn't there. Nurse said she was taken for a CT scan and should be back any minute. So I went to buy parking vouchers and coffee. And she still wasn't there. And I waited and waited and finally decided I had to go to work.

Got to the office and called and she put me on the phone with her hospital case manager who is helping to find an assisted living center. Which is just code for Old Folk's Home. She sent me a list of about 20 places and it was my job to narrow the list.

Then Big Boss went insane and decided that my immediate assistance was required all day to help prepare for an arbitration that we have know about for at least 3 months and for which we are not the primary attorneys (insurance defense counsel is handling, we are general counsel). He gave me about 5 research projects and then buzzed me about every 5 seconds needing some document or other that I was apparently the only person in the office qualified to locate (especially frustrating when said document was literally sitting right in front of him).

In the middle of all that I managed to call 4 places for info. My plan was to visit this evening or tomorrow morning.

But Big Boss kept buzzing and demanding.

Then, My mother called to tell me they are moving her TOMORROW. (So much for buying those parking vouchers this morning.) Oh holy crap, how was I ever going to find a place by tomorrow? Believe me, at this point I would have gladly hired someone to research assisted living centers, but I didn't have time to find anybody.

And Big Boss kept buzzing and demanding.

As the afternoon pressed on, it became clear there was no way in heck I was going to be able to find an assisted living center on my own. So I recruited my brother to check the state's records on medical facilities, and poor DH had to tour the ones I had selected.

Yes, he is the awesomest husband in the entire world. I hardly had time to even hand off the information. Poor guy had virtually no information but he was a trooper and at least someone has seen the inside of these places.. Every time I picked up the phone Big Boss barged into my office looking irritated.

About 7:30 tonight, Big Boss said, "Do you have that research done yet?" To which I replied, "No, because you keep needing me to do other things."

And then he said to Partner, "You need to divide this project with LC because she can't get it done."

And I have him the raised eyebrow look I give my kids when they are telling a fib, and he said "I mean because I keep needing her."

OMG, I was ready to strangle him. I was the angriest and most frustrated I have ever been at this job--although I'm sure the stress from the mom situation contributed. (And no, I wasn't not getting my research done because of her--I spent maybe 30 minutes on the phone with that stuff, shoved what I could onto my brother and husband, worked through lunch and barely took a bathroom break all day and billed 10 hours).

Another day like this and I'm going to have to start keeping a bottle of Jack in my desk.

Flashback

2011-08-29T12:04:00.002-06:00

"What would the child you once were think of the adult you've become?"

I saw this on Pinterest and began pondering the answer.

I certainly didn't envision the life I have now. I always said that I would be a doctor. I never really wanted kids. Didn't spend too much time thinking about a husband. Probably assumed that I would still live in Hometown.

But I don't think that kid would be disappointed that things turned out differently, because what I have is good.

Sometimes I feel a tiny twinge of regret for not pursuing medicine. I think that I would have been good at it. But law is a really good fit for me, too, and I think it gives me far more time with my family.

And I'm so glad that fate took over and gave me PS, because having kids is definitely the most awesome thing that's ever happened. (The twins were more intentional and less fateful, but still awesome.) Oh yeah, and DH--he's pretty awesome, too.

So I think Kid LC would be pretty proud of Adult LC. Life's not perfect, but it's pretty darn good. And I'm happy. I wasn't happy for much of my childhood and was clinically depressed through my teen years. I think kid LC would be pleased that I grew up and found happiness.

Brave New World

2011-08-26T20:25:00.002-06:00

So I don't quite know what to do with my current situation, with my mother being suddenly thrust upon me. I have worked hard to keep my distance from her, and I have spent more time with her this week that I have in the last 5 years.

I won't go into details, and I know that many don't understand. You can't understand if you had a good mom. It took DH a very long time to understand because he had an awesome mom--but he has finally seen enough to sort of get it.

She just never made her kids a priority. Whatever man was in her life was her top priority and my brother and I were frequently left to fend for ourselves.

So they only time we ever really got along was when I was in my early 20s. When I wasn't a responsibility or burden for her, but before I had my own kids, which were just too much of a bother and took attention away from her. She wanted a buddy, not a daughter.

And so she has been tolerable for the last few days because all of my attention has been focused on her. I've been the buddy, not distracted by my kids. I've barely seen them this week because I've been with her. But before I left today I said, "I'll come back tomorrow and bring the kids."

And she said, "As long as they don't hit my leg."

OMG--they are 10 and almost 13. They aren't toddlers--it's not like they're gonna try to crawl in her lap. She's not exactly a snugly, cookie-baking kind of Grandma anyway. But the sad fact is she doesn't want my kids around. It will take attention away from her.

And now I am being dragged into taking time away from my kids to focus on her for the next two months. I have got to figure out how to define this new relationship and draw a new line. My kids have always been and will continue to be my priority and she will have to learn that she comes after them. She won't understand--and she certainly thinks that I owe her more than I do.

But I've really missed my kids this week. And I really do not want them to have the disdain for me that I have for my mother because something else was always more important.

Waiting

2011-08-25T15:48:00.002-06:00

At the hospital. I worked until 11 this morning, and then headed over to the hospital to be here for my mother's surgery scheduled for 1:15. We figured they would take to pre-op a couple of hours ahead of time, and I wanted to be here to talk to he docs.

Of course, 1:15 came and went. They finally took her down to pre-op at 2:30 and didn't take her to surgery until 4:00. But the monitor in the waiting room that's supposed to keep me updated shows that they haven't even started the surgery yet. Looks like it is going to be a late night.

Thankfully I found a make-your-own trail mix bar in the cafeteria, so I have provisions for my wait. And my laptop, nook and iphone to entertain me. How did we ever survive before we had all of our electronic accoutrements?

Like an Injured Cat in Heat

2011-08-24T20:43:00.002-06:00

TT got her violin today and SS gets her viola tomorrow. Gee, I had forgotten how much fun it was to have a beginning instrumentalist in the house.

Meanwhile, today my mom asked her doctor today how long she would have to stay in Big City before she could return to Hometown. He told her that she needed to stay here until after the replacement hip was installed--at least two months. She has a host of new docs here and they want her to stick with those docs during this treatment. And really, she's in better hands here with specialists at an excellent teaching hospital than back in Hometown where the best of the best are unlikely to practice (and in fact, failed to find this infection despite the fact she's had a low-grade fever for months).

But I'm not sure how to deal with the next two months. Our personal issues aside*, I'm just not sure how to fit a sick parent into the mix of my already very busy life. Of course, we've been down this road before with MIL. It was really hard then, and we were not the primary caregivers and the family had a lot of support.

Here her options are inpatient rehab or my house. We would be primary caregivers and would have a lot less support. It's looking like inpatient rehab, because we just don't know how to make my house work (and that's really not a path I want to go down). We brought the wheelchair in the house tonight and it won't fit through any of the bathroom doors--and there is not much room to expand the doorways even if we wanted to go that route.

But rehab means that I will have to fit visiting into my schedule several times a week. She doesn't have any friends or much family here. It's only been two days and the work/hospital/kids schedule is already wearing on me.

Ugh, there is no good answer here. And by the time she gets past the two months, they install the new part, do rehab after that surgery, and then get around to doing the hip that they were supposed to do in the first place we are looking at a 6-month ordeal.

*She has, surprisingly, been on her best behavior. Yesterday she even asked if I had lost weight. I've never heard that--only how much she thinks I need to lose. I think she understands her predicament. I know my brother had a chat with her when he had to bring her down for her first appointment with this surgeon and she started giving him attitude.

Looong Day

2011-08-23T19:20:00.002-06:00

Up at 5:30 for mother's hip replacement surgery. Got a call at 6:15 informing me that surgery had been pushed back to 10:15. Of course, I was already on my way. But at least I had time run by Starbucks.

In the pre-op room the anesthesiologist, Dr. Wong, came in and introduced himself. My stepfather said, "Oh, we were really hoping for Dr. Right instead of Dr. Wrong." OMG, I wanted to crawl in a hole and disappear.

10 minutes after they took her back for surgery the surgeon came out. She has cysts/tumors in both hips, and they were going to aspirate both to find out what was going on. When they aspirated the left hip it had a big nasty infection. Surgeon said he can't do right hip replacement while left hip is infected. The only option is to operate on the left hip, remove the tumor and the existing hip replacement and put in an antibiotic spacer for two months until they can confirm the infection is gone, at which point he can put in the left hip replacement.

In the meantime, she has no left hip for two months? How does someone not have a hip for two months? I do not understand. I try to ask surgeon these questions, but all he wants to know right then is if we want him to proceed or if we want to wake her so that she can make the decision (even though there's not a decision).

We tell him to wake her. She needs to know if she's not going to have a hip for two months. And so we wait and wait for word from the recovery room. An hour-and-a-half later we can go back there (yes, she was under for 10 minutes and had no surgery). The doc already talked to her, just as she was coming out of the anesthesia. She does not understand that her existing hip replacement part is being removed.

But I wasn't on any drugs and I heard exactly what the doctor said. And I am peeved that he talked to her before we were allowed back there. God, doctors are such pains in the ass.

So anyway, the new procedure is scheduled for Thursday and she is admitted and on super-antibiotics until then. We have no idea how long she will be stuck here. And her right hip, which has her wheelchair bound, can be replaced for months. And her husband has to leave tomorrow because he has an appointment with the oncologist on Thursday and a bone marrow aspiration on Friday because he was just diagnosed with non-Hodgkins leukemia.

I left the hospital at 3:00 and headed to the office until 7:00.

Now exhausted. Just wanna go to bed. Need to find out if the surgeon is supposed to come by in the morning and if I need to be there before dawn to catch him.

Then I have a CLE for half a day tomorrow, back to the hospital, back to the office. Fortunately the hospital is within 15 minutes from my office. The next few weeks are gonna be tough.

Crazy Busy Exhausting Day

2011-08-17T20:45:00.002-06:00

Got to work at 8:30 for a 9:00 client meeting. Saw client crossing the parking lot on my way in. So much for having time for meeting prep.

Had an end-of the-day deadline arising from the meeting. Then another client called with another end-of-the-day deadline.

Then a pro bono client for whom I have been working on on a custody modification left me a frantic voicemail. We pretty much had an agreement for temporary orders regarding custody and decided to hold off on fighting about child support because we wanted temp orders in place before school started.But Dad decided he wanted temp orders to be permanent and only wanted to pay 1/3 the statutory guideline for child support. He freaked when we insisted on the minimum statutory guideline (even though he is high income and we could likely get more) and the whole thing got really ugly and almost blew up. Fortunately cooler heads (the lawyers') prevailed and we are back on track.

In the middle of everything else, I noticed that my phone wasn't charging. I borrowed the receptionist's charger and still no luck. So I popped into the Apple store on my way home. My phone was 4 days out of warranty. And they gave me a new one! Yay Apple! They made a crappy day a lot less crappy.

Finally made it home by 8:30. The kids were bouncing off the walls. Today was our nanny's last day and she bought them all huge bags of candy. But they are bummed that she is leaving; she's like a big sister to them.

Tomorrow is meet the teacher night and school starts Monday. Still not ready.

My Favorite Movies

2011-08-15T19:29:00.002-06:00

I'm watching Father of the Bride. I love this movie. It is one of those movies that I will always watch if I find it showing, no matter how many times I have seen it. Others on that list...

1) Dirty Dancing
2) Pretty Woman
3) Grease
4) Steel Magnolias

Yeah, I'm all about the chick flicks.

Home!

2011-08-14T09:51:00.002-06:00

After a fantastic week, we finally made it home at midnight last night. Kinda feel like I have vacation hangover this morning.

We spent out last day hitting the outlet malls--well timed since storms blew through that morning stirring up the sea and making the water murkier and the shore yuckier than it had been all week.

I wanted to do a bit of school shopping for the kids--although we really don't do serious shopping until October. I bought the kids a ton of new clothes at the beginning of summer, and it will be to hot to wear jeans and fall clothes for at least another 6 weeks.

But they did all get new shoes. Believe me, setting 3 girls loose in a shoe store is a true test of patience. DH was a real trooper. My 10 year olds bought size 8.5 running shoes! I wear a 9! They look like they a wearing clown shoes with their tiny bodies and giant feet.

I got some great deals at the Ann Taylor outlet, but my biggest find was a new work bag. Right after I graduated, I took my grad money and bought a giant red leather Fossil bag that was the perfect size for carrying files back. It was very sleek and polished with clean lines--kind of a handbag/briefcase hybrid that worked very well for carrying to court or depos.

I carried that bag every single day for three years. But it started to look pretty shabby. The seams and hardware were holding up fine, but the beautiful red was fading to white (a problem I wouldn't have had with a natural colored bag), and it just felt too worn to carry. Sadly, I tucked my beloved bag into the back of my closet, and began my search for a replacement.

Most recently I've been carrying a huge red kate spade nylon bag that PS has dubbed "the lunch box." I get tons of compliments on it, but it is just not working out. It will hold files, but only vertically, and everything just falls to the bottom and crumples. Before that was a gorgeous burgundy suede Cole Haan bag. It would hold a single file folder, but not an entire Redweld. It wasn't quite polished enough for court, and the suede didn't really work for summer.

So when we were out shopping, I wanted to check out the Fossil and Coach outlets in my new bag search. The Coach outlet had great prices, but nothing like what I needed. And the majority of their bags were the signature print. I really like the clean lines of the classic leather Coach bags. I hate the signature print--in Coach or any other label. At the risk of offending my readers, I'll just say it--I think it's tacky and screams "look at my label."

And then in the Fossil outlet, I spotted it. My exact bag. But shiny and new. And only $80--less than half of what I paid for the original. Now, I did check out the rest of the store. But I didn't find anything else as polished and perfectly suited for work. And so I bought it. Yes, the exact same bag that I bought back in 2007.

Is that weird? It feels weird. But I love that bag. It is exactly what I need, and a bargain at $80.

And yes, all of my bags are red. I guess it's my thing. And besides, I can carry the red regardless of whether I am wearing black or brown and not feel uncoordinated.

Winding Up

2011-08-11T12:59:00.002-06:00

Yesterday we headed to the Naval Aviation Museum-it was very cool. Tons of war planes and the kids could sit in many of them. DH and the twins especially enjoyed it. PS is suddenly too cool to sit in the planes and has decided everything is boring.

On our way out we noticed a little sign that said "Lighthouse Open," so we detoured to visit a 150 year old working lighthouse. It was also very cool. It was my first time to visit a lighthouse and we got to climb all the way to the top (177 steps!). On our way back out we learned that the lighthouse was rumored to be haunted and has been featured on Ghosthunters.

Today we went on a dolphin cruise. We cruised around the key for a while before they came out, but we finally did get to see a pair of dolphins jumping in the wake of our boat. Now the kids are begging to go to Sea World so that they can pet dolphins. (Funny, since we went to Sea World right before the twins turned 3 and SS was terrified of everything--we couldn't even sit in the top row of the stadium for the Shamu show without her freaking out).

And then my mother called. She is having surgery on August 23rd and will be in the hospital for at least 2 weeks before she moves on to rehab. But she doesn't know if it will be inpatient or outpatient rehab. That is my $10,000 question. And they will only do one hip at a time, so this whole scenario will have to be repeated.

She also told me that her husband found out yesterday that he has cancer. (He's been ill, that's why my brother drove her to my city.) So he will be in hometown dealing with chemo and the other evils that constitute cancer treatment, while she is here having her hips replaced. Yuck.

Tomorrow is our last full day here. We've had fun, but it is enough. I am ready to be back in my own home and bed. Not looking forward to sorting through what will surely be an overflowing inbox, though.

Vacation and Reality

2011-08-10T08:49:00.002-06:00

Yesterday went much better than the day before. We spent the morning figuring out how to drive a boat and navigate waterways, took a nap, had an early dinner at a local hot spot owned by Jimmy Buffet's sister, and hit the beach at dusk.

I've decided early evening is my favorite time to go to the beach. It's not so dang hot, the crowds have thinned, and the colors are beautiful.

This morning, DH and the twins have gone fishing and I am enjoying some quite time. Our condo is small--a one bedroom, with bunks built into the hallway and a pull-out sofa; maybe half the size of our downstairs at home--and we've had plenty of togetherness. Plus, our friends Damp and Sandy have moved in, and this gives me a chance to sweep them back out without three kids underfoot.

So everything is great again--except for the call I got from my brother yesterday. He had to drive our mother* from Hometown to my city to visit a specialist. She has severe health issues that sort of began when I was a senior in high school and she fell and broke her hip (she was 43). Since then, she's has had both of her hips replaced twice, along with every other major joint in her body.

Anyway, she recently fell again and needs another hip replacement, but can't find a surgeon in Hometown who will do it and is wheelchair bound until something is done. Apparently this is a major undertaking because her bones have deteriorated so much. So she started looking in my city and finally found a surgeon who will talk to her. My brother (who is cursing me for being out of town right now) was charged with bringing her down for her appointment.

The city doc said that she has tumors in both hips and both need to be replaced. He also wants to do aspirations in both hips to see if the tumors are malignant.

So, it's looking like she's going to be stuck in my city for a while. Right now she is staying with her brother and her brother and sister are helping her out this week. (Both live on the opposite end of Big City from me.) But I have a feeling she's going to end up with me. Her doctor is really close to my office, and the hospital is closest to me. Besides, her brother and sister have their own jobs and lives.

I am not terribly happy about this. First, because I have really tried to keep my mother at a distance (for my own and my kids' sakes). And because my house is not wheelchair friendly. There are multiple steps up the front walk, and a tight squeeze through the back door. Only the master suite is downstairs. The kids' rooms and the guest room are upstairs. Her staying with us means DH and me moving into the upstairs guest room so that she can have our room downstairs.

Ugh. Despite my issues with my mother, I do feel an obligation to help out with this situation. But I reserve the right to bitch about it. At least I have 3 days of vacation before I have to deal with this reality.

*I have mentioned occasionally on this blog that I don't get along with my mother, and have essentially cut of ties with her. I talk to her a couple of time a year, but I intentionally keep her at a distance because I don't need her drama infecting my life. The reasons are numerous and I don't feel like going into them now, but they are justified.

Vacay Day 2: This Vacation May Kill Us

2011-08-08T16:36:00.002-06:00

Today do not go well.

We started off at the little zoo that could--a lovely little zoo full of playful critters that you can get a bit closer to than at most of the big zoos we've visited. And the girls got to ride a camel and play with lemurs.

Unfortunately, halfway through our visit, PS started feeling bad. First she started seeing spots, then she said her head hurt and she was getting nauseous. I had to leave DH and the twins playing with the lemurs while I ran PS back to the condo. She cried the whole way back. I'm pretty sure she was suffering from her first migraine. I gave her a dose of super Excedrin and a cold washrag on her head and left her alone in a cool dark room for a while.

After I retrieved the rest of the family from the zoo, I took the TT and SS down to the beach while DH stayed with PS in the condo. The wind was blowing today and the waves were crashing hard. I took the kids' boogie board into the the water and was immediately rolled into the sand, and have road rash (sea rash?) on my shin to show for it. For the rest of the afternoon a stream of blood slowly leaked down my leg.

A little later I had retired to the beach with a magazine while the girls played in the surf. SS had a floaty mat and TT had a ring. They started floating a little down the beach from me. They were right at the edge of my comfort level. And, then, within a minute, they were beyond my comfort level. I started walking down the beach toward them, reached TT quickly. I could hear SS yelling at her, and from the tone, I knew she was scared. I ordered TT back to the beach, and headed out toward SS. Even as I was moving toward her, the ocean seemed to be drawing her farther and farther away.

I am not an athlete, but, thankfully, I have always been a strong swimmer. Still, about halfway toward SS I started getting worried. I couldn't touch at all, and she still looked so far away. We weren't on a public beach, so there was no lifeguard. Only a handful of other people, who I hoped were paying attention. Three-quarters of the way there, I was getting tired and really worried. It was pure mommy adrenaline that got me to SS. I finally nabbed the end of SS's mat and side-stroked my way back to shore. It was a whole lot easier getting back to shore than going out. But by the time we did get back my heart was beating about a thousand beats per minute and I was breathing hard. I think it took two hours for my heart rate to come back down.

Once we got back to the beach, I plopped down to text DH. But my iphone said that the temperature was too high to operate. (WTF?) So I carefully balanced it in the cooler. In the meantime, the girls went back to collecting shells in the surf.

And then SS got stung by a jellyfish. So she comes up to me screaming. And, of course, I'd left the bottle of vinegar back in the condo. Right at that moment the wind grabbed TT's floaty ring and rolled it, on it's side down the beach. It rolled and rolled and rolled--at least a couple hundred yards.

So I was still recovering fro my deep-sea rescue, one kid was screaming in pain, and the other was running down the beach after a $2 floaty. At least my phone cooled down so I was able to frantically text DH to bring down the vinegar and help us Sherpa all of our beach gear back to the condo.

By that time PS was feeling better, so we all schlepped back to the condo and crashed for a nap. I can now feel every single muscle in my shoulders and back. At least I got a nice work-out.

The Leisurely Life

2011-08-07T20:06:00.002-06:00

We made it to our vacation condo., after a 12 hour drive yesterday. Of course, the drive took a little longer after a spontaneous detour through a Civil War battleground. The battleground wasn't particularly exciting, but along the battleground tour we stumbled upon a war ship that had been sunk and then raised in the 1960's. It was very cool and definitely made the detour worthwhile.

This morning it was ungodly hot and humid. We came from hot and humid., so I didn't expect the heat to affect us. Here is is less hot and more humid which I think is worse that the more hot and less humid that we came from.

We delayed going to the beach so that we could stock up on groceries and floaties (because we hadn't already dragged enough crap with us). Fortunately, but the time we made it back to the condo, showers had moved through, dropping temperatures and taking the humidity with them. We spent the rest of the afternoon until sunset on the beach, and the kids are begging to go back first thing in the morning. Yep. We have absolutely nothing planned, except on Tuesday when I have reserved a pontoon boat so that we can explore the bay.

So far this vacation is going well.

Baby It's Hot Outside

2011-08-04T07:34:00.007-06:00

I have tried not to complain about the heat. I'm just thankful that I'm not pregnant. I carried PS during the second hottest summer in [my hot state's] history. I think we've surpassed that, and it's now the third hottest summer. But it was hot and I was hugely pregnant and miserable and we lived in a crappy duplex where the air conditioner broke every other week.

So this summer hasn't been so bad. I'm not pregnant and I pretty much go from my air conditioned house to my air conditioned car to my air conditioned office and then back again.

Until yesterday. Our house was uncomfortably warm last night at 80 degrees. I though the a/c was just having trouble keeping up in 110 degree heat. But we woke up this morning sticky and sweaty and realizing that the a/c definitely was not working.

We called our neighbor who is an a/c guy, but he was already off on another job. Fortunately, though, he was able to help DH diagnose the problem on the phone and after a quick trip to the parts store we were back in business. Total cost-- $60 and a six-pack for the neighbor.

But the heat seems to be making people crabby. This morning the gate to my office parking garage wasn't working. The lady in front of my kept swiping and swiping her card to no avail. So, since I was stuck behind her, I hopped out of my car to try my card. (I knew she worked in my building because I've been trying to figure out her vanity plate (CU AT PK) for a year.) The gate didn't work when I swiped my card either. So she snatched my card out of my hand and said, "Let me try it." After swiping unsuccessfully another 5 times, she shoved my card at me and said, "I can't believe this, today of all days." Never did her mouth utter a "thank you" for trying to help out.

Then at lunch an equally cranky woman was excessively bitchy to the guys who work the little cafe in my building. I had to bite my tongue to keep from telling her to drop the attitude. Instead I was just extra nice to the cafe guys (these guys make my lunch multiple times a week, I'm always nice to them, anyway).

Seriously, is it necessary to take your crappy attitude out on everybody around you? Eat some damn chocolate and get over it.

Layoffs

2011-08-01T21:04:00.002-06:00

A few weeks ago my co-worker was let go. My firm took great pains to ensure that I knew that it was a performance based decision as opposed to an economic one. And that my position was secure. That they fully intended to replace co-worker.

Today a secretary was laid off. The reason: the firm has decided not to replace co-worker after all. So we are (were) overstaffed. It was a business decision--an economic one. Quite a different tale than the one I heard a few weeks ago. But again my firm took great pains to assure me that my position is secure.

So I am the low (wo)man on the totem pole, and it now looks like it will be that way for a while. This doesn't exactly give me warm fuzzies--even though my bosses were highly complimentary of me after both incidents.

On the one hand, I anticipate that I would be the next one out the door if the economy worsens. And I don't know if I would see it coming, because I'm pretty sure the last two didn't (although I definitely noticed enough buzzing in the office both times around to know something was up).

On the other hand, I've been busy since my co-worker left. I am the only full-time associate supporting 5 partners. I think they'd be in trouble without an associate. But it also means that I get all the crap jobs that the partners don't want to do, and that would typically be handed to a lower-level associate. I'm just not sure how I feel about this scenario. My firm is top-heavy and I don't know if there is enough room left for me to grow.

I guess I have some thinking to do, although I don't know that it even matters in this economy.

3 Weeks

2011-07-31T07:52:00.003-06:00

Until school starts. Ugh. I am not ready for school to start. I love our summer pace. I don't have to nag the kids to get moving in the morning. I get to sleep in a little bit because I don't have to nag the kids to get moving in the morning. The sun is shining when I wake up. Traffic is sooooo much better--I can make it to the office in 30 minutes!

And when I come home, I don't have to spend my evenings working on homework or school projects. No soccer practice. No teacher meetings or concerts or PTA programs I have to attend.

And I get to spend more time with the kids in the evening. 8:30 bedtimes mean I only get to spend an hour or two with the kiddos during the week. During the summer, we may be going for a bike ride or going out for yogurt at 8:30.

I'm just not ready to get back to all that. But I spent most of yesterday buying school supplies. And beach stuff. At least we still have vacation to look forward to, our last hurrah of summer. We leave next Saturday for a week on the beach. And I'm gonna need it by the time I survive this week at work.

Making Headlines

2011-07-27T19:04:00.002-06:00

Ok, maybe not headlines. But my client was featured in a national news story that was published this morning, regarding the case that I mention in this post.

We knew the article was coming. Shortly after the hearing a reporter started hounding me for a comment. Sadly, I had to decline since it is likely that my client will have to testify again and I didn't want to give the defendants any ammo to use against her. But the article was really nice, and painted my client in a good light.

Oh yeah, and I was mentioned too...for declining to comment. Still, it's my fist press mention. Another entry in the baby lawyer book.

I Love to Ride My Bicycle

2011-07-26T19:52:00.003-06:00

DH took PS to a concert tonight, so it was just the twins and me. Despite the fact that the thermometer on my back porch was reading 109, I agreed to take a bike ride with them. Fortunately, DH just got a bike for his birthday, so I had one to ride. It's probably been 20 years since I spent any amount of time on a bike. (I'm 36--got a car when I was 16, haven't had a bike since. Yep, 20 years.) Fortunately, it's just like "they" say.

Well, except that the kiddos insisted I wear a helmet. I've never worn a bike helmet. The girls were baffled by this. It is beyond their comprehension that there was a time when people didn't wear bike helmets. So I wore the helmet (and it was dang hot).

I think I may need to get a bike of my very own. I forgot how much I missed cruising around the neighborhood. And it's nice that the kids are big enough that I have to worry about keeping up with them instead of the other way around. (The main reason I never got another bike--it just didn't sound like fun with little kids trailing behind at turtle speed.)

Not to mention the exercise factor. We weren't out very long because of the heat, but I was still feeling muscles I had forgotten about. And the bike is doc approved, since I have old lady bones.

Double Digits

2011-07-23T20:24:00.002-06:00

My twins turn 10 tomorrow. Which means that all my kids are now in double digits. Where did the time go? It seems like just yesterday I was 9-months pregnant with twins. Or breastfeeding practically 24 hours a day. Or trying to figure out how I would ever survive three-year-old twins.

And now they are 10. They have become awesome people. And they are actually useful. SS makes the best fried eggs and iced tea in the world. TT just takes whatever the world throws at her and keeps right on rolling without a complaint.

And they are still sweet and cuddly and love their mom and dad. I still get about a million hugs and kisses a day from them. (PS would hardly give us a hug if her life depended upon it; she is not big on physical affection.) And when we watched tv together last night, SS curled right up next to me the whole time. I love that they still do this.

We bought them new big kid bikes for their birthday. With hand brakes and gears. And cell phones. (We were on the fence about that one.) They are getting big. I miss buying Little People. But we did get some Legos, one of the few toys we can buy anymore.

It has been weighing on me a lot lately how little time we have until all our kids go off to college and start their own lives. When I was young I NEVER wanted kids. But they are definitely the most awesome thing that has ever happened to me.

Feet and Anger

2011-07-21T15:48:00.004-06:00

Took TT to the ortho today who said that her toe is NOT broken. She just has a bad sprain (her foot is still really swollen!). No more splint, no more crutches. Woot! She can ride her bike and go swimming again and, best of all, our beach vacation isn't screwed up. (Can you imagine a cast on the beach?)

He also hesitantly said that she could still go to the amusement park for her birthday this weekend. I'm a bit concerned about this, since she would now be walking on it all day. I had a bad sprain when the twins were about 10 months old. We went to Chicago a month later and I walked too much the first day and was miserable the rest of the trip because my foot hurt so much. That sprain took forever to heal and hurt a heck of a lot more than the fractures I had last summer.

And in other news I am mad at DH. We went out last night, so he picked me up from work, leaving my car in the underground parking garage. He dropped me off at 9:30 last night--right at the stairs to go into the garage (he couldn't drive into the garage because the pass was in my car). And then he left! Without making sure that nobody murdered me and that I actually came back out of the dark, empty parking garage. Who does that? Whenever I drop off DH, or anybody else, I always make sure that they are safely in their car and actually moving before I leave.

He thinks I am ridiculous for being angry. I think he is lacking in civility.

Cooking Weekend

2011-07-17T17:22:00.004-06:00

This was supposed to be a cooking and cleaning weekend, but it ended up more of a shopping and cooking weekend. Haven't made much progress on the cleaning, but at least I have a refrigerator full of food and a week's worth of meals in my freezer.

A commenter asked about recipes a few weeks ago, so I'll share what I did:

I brought home 3 lbs of chicken tenderloins and used 1/3 of it in Brown Butter Ravioli with Crispy Sage and the remaining 2/3 in Crock Pot Santa Fe Chicken. We had the Brown Butter Ravioli for dinner Saturday night (it was really good) and froze the Santa Fe Chicken (haven't tried this yet) for later in the week.

Today I browned 5 lbs of ground beef with a little onion and bell pepper, 2.5 lbs of bacon (use the oven!) and cut up a rotisserie chicken from Costco (a great cheat!). Most of the bacon and the chicken will be used on Monday and Tuesday to make Chicken Bacon Ranch Calzones and Garlic Chicken Farfalle (this is so unbelievably delicious). The rest of the bacon went into breakfast burritos that were frozen for later in the week.

I added spaghetti sauce to part of the ground beef to be used in Skillet Lasagna and spaghetti in the next week or two. I added refried beans (along with a little cumin, chili powder, onion powder and garlic) to another part to make burritos for lunch this week. (I really, really hate store-bought frozen foods for lunch). I have several more portions of ground beef stored in the freezer for later.

Tonight we had T-bone steaks with homestyle green beans and modified version of Crash Hot Potatoes.

I'll admit that this set of recipes isn't particularly healthy. The pasta dishes use lots of butter and cream. Also, I don't regularly buy bacon, so the number of bacon dishes is an anomaly. And the 5 lbs of ground beef will probably last for a month. We are also carb-heavy. That's always my weakness. I love carbs and the kids never gripe about pasta.

But I think cooking from scratch with real ingredients has got to be better than a bunch of over-processed foods. And we supplement with lots of fruits and veggies. And, most importantly, I can have dinner on the table in less than 15 minutes every night this week.

Chaos

2011-07-15T20:17:00.002-06:00

I keep dreaming about wind. Last night I dreamed that I was walking through a courtyard and it was very windy. Another woman was walking with a big purse that was hanging open and the wind suddenly filled up her purse and lifter her into the air like a hot air balloon.

The night before I dreamed that we were traveling and stopped at a little shack in the middle of nowhere. We were stuck there for 3 days because it was so windy that the dirt stirred up by the wind impeded visibility to the point that all nearby roads were closed.

I think the wind dreams are symbolic of the chaos that has taken over my life.

Work

It's busy. That's a good thing. I am much happier when I am busy. But it is hectic busy. And I'm still a little frustrated by the monotony of my job.

Home

My house is a mess. There are baskets of clean laundry all over my bedroom. The rest of the house is generally messy. Our nanny is supposed to supervise the kids' chores and perform light housekeeping tasks. She's been slacking. But she is going off to college soon and only has another 6 weeks with us.

I think that we have decided not to replacing her. The kids really don't need a lot of supervision these days. PS turns 13 soon and is very mature and responsible. The biggest challenge will be getting kids to their activities, but we will talk to the neighbor to see if she is interested in helping out with this.

The good news is that I am testing out a new housekeeper next week. Hopefully having someone come in every week will help with the house-mess chaos.

Kids (and dog)

Bob is doing great. He is already back to chasing bunnies in the yard and running up and down the stairs.

Speaking of stairs, TT broke her toe walking down the stairs. I've broken lots of toes and don't usually consider it a big deal. But she broke the big one and it was hugely swollen and bruised half-way down her foot. So I took her to the doc this morning who put some funky splint-thing on it, gave her crutches, told her not to put any weight on it, and referred us out to an ortho. (Yes, this is the kid who broke her arm and has only been out of the arm splint for 6 weeks.)

She thinks having crutches is super cool. But she doesn't get how much this is going to make the rest of her summer suck. The splint she has now can't get wet. So no pool. And we have a fully paid beach vacation scheduled in 3 weeks! And her birthday is next week. She's fully expecting a new bike and to go to the Big Amusement Park. So if she gets a bike, she won't be able to ride it for a month. That sounds like a sucky birthday. And she will be totally bummed if we can't go to the Big Amusement Park.

Finances

DH's employer started a crazy new insurance plan this year, and health care costs are insane. Oh how I miss my PPO. I don't think it would be so bad in a regular year, but with all of TT's issues this year, it's ugly. But at least next year we'll have a better idea of how much to contribute to our FSA. We way underfunded this year because we did not fully understand how this new plan would work (his employer automatically funded the FSA, but we blew through that by April). Not to mention the ginormous vet bill that we just got, compliments of Bob.

It's not debilitating, just not well planned for and adding more stress.

I just want my kids and my dog to be well and my house to be clean. Is that too much to ask?

Awful Night

2011-07-09T22:19:00.002-06:00

About 8:30 this evening we headed to the neighbor's house to water her plants while she is out of town. I told the girls to put Bob in the backyard before we left so he wouldn't try to run out the front door.

Bob was quite unhappy that his family was in the neighbor's yard while he was stuck in our yard, and was doing his best to ram his head through the fence. So we told PS to go back home and let him into the house. A few minutes later, her sisters followed. Just as DH and I were finishing up, TT ran back over to tell us that Bob had gotten out and was taking off down the street. PS and SS had followed, so DH took off running after them. I went to get the car, with SS in tow. (This isn't the first time Bob has taken off, and the best way to catch him is to convince him to take a ride in the car.)

As I reached the end of our block I caught a glimpse of SS standing at the edge of our neighborhood. Which borders a busy two-lane highway with a 55 mph speed limit. When I reached the highway I saw the girls and DH standing on one side screaming. It was hard to see what was going on in the road because it was dusk and the oncoming car headlights put everything into silhouette. My biggest fear at that moment was that one of my children would take off across the highway after the dog. Traffic was too heavy to pull onto the highway, so I just laid on the horn, hoping it would make the other cars slow down and pay attention.

And then the cars in both directions stopped and I saw DH and PS take off across the road. SS was still on the side opposite me. I pulled onto the highway and saw that Bob had been hit. I flipped a u-turn in front of the stopped cars--my top priority was to get SS into the car before she tried to cross the road, or a car came onto the shoulder and hit her. I walked down to where DH and PS were, and I could see that Bob was lying down but moving his head. Lots of other people had stopped and were out of their cars trying to help. (DH said later that some strange lady came over and started yelling at the kids who hit Bob. It wasn't their fault a big black dog came darting into traffic. And PS said that lots of other people were crying.) I yelled across the road that I would bring the car over (it was a few couple hundred feet away on the other side of the highway.)

Meanwhile, someone found a blanket, which was made into a makeshift gurney to carry Bob to the car. He looked to have a broken leg and was bleeding from his mouth. We loaded him into the back and DH called the vet. PS and SS, who had seen everything, were hysterical.

We headed to the vet's office, and she met us within just a few minutes. Bob was very calm in the car, and stood up when DH tried to lift him out of the car. In the vet's office he was panting heavily, but he was standing on his leg and wagging his tail. X-rays showed no breaks or internal injuries. He just has lots of road rash, swelling in one knee, and apparently bit his tongue. The vet sent him home with lots of pain killers and antibiotics.

It is awful seeing Bob hurt and the kids so inconsolable. They are all trying to blame themselves. (And yes, he should be better trained.) SS is sleeping on the couch tonight so that she can stay near him. But the worst of all was the very real fear that one of my kids was going to get killed on that very busy highway. It was like watching a movie in slow motion and there was nothing I could do.

It looks like Bob will be ok. We can clearly see how this situation could have been worse in so many different ways and know that we are lucky it wasn't worse. And we are so grateful to everyone who stopped to help. We wish there was a way to let them know that Bob turned out ok--especially the kids who hit him and got yelled at.

Have a Safe and Happy Holiday

2011-07-03T21:21:00.003-06:00

We took off Friday afternoon and headed to Hometown for the holiday weekend. Our plan was to let our kids experience some of our favorite things about Hometown--something we never get to do because we always have a whirlwind of relative-visiting when we're here.

And so yesterday morning we went hiking in the fantastic canyon that we spent a good part of our teenage years in. We were thrilled to find that the kids loved it as much as we do. The twins apparently learned all about tracking when they were at Girl Scout camp, and so they had great fun pointing out tracks and informing us of whether they were opossum or raccoon or deer or horse or armadillo or coyote.*

Last night we took FIL to dinner and an outdoor theater production. (I think DH is done with musical theater for the year--this is our third production in as many weeks.)

And today we visited our grandparents and finished the day off with a barbecue at my dad's house with my brother and nieces. (We had to fit the mandatory visits in somewhere.) It was nice getting to hang out with my brother and his girls. I'm pretty sure my dad never anticipated having 7 granddaughters and it's a little crazy when they're all together, but also a lot of fun.

Tomorrow we head home. I think the kids had a great time (TT told me as much).

*DH's sibs went with us and I overheard this conversation between my 6-year-old niece and 3-year-old nephew:

Nephew: What's a coyote?
Niece: It's a kind of wild dog.
Nephew: Ooohhh, that sounds scary.
Niece: It is scary. They eat people.

Crazy Week

2011-06-28T20:15:00.002-06:00

This week is crazy week. PS is attending a half-day engineering camp on the campus where I attended law school. Meanwhile her sisters are attending lego robotics camp* in our little suburb, 25 miles away. And of course they both have to be at camp at 9:00 am. Fortunately, my sweet neighbor agreed to drop off the twins, since it is only 5 minutes from our house.

PS's camp is 5 minutes from my office. Which means that she spends the other half of her day with me at work. I spoke with Big Boss about this last week, and he was less than thrilled--concerned about having kids wandering through the office. Um, she's 12, going into 8th grade. She sits in a corner and reads or plays video games or watches movies on my laptop (exactly what she would be doing at home). I have never had my kids at the office before and don't intend to make it a habit. It's a one time event and a great opportunity for her. And nobody else in my office has kids, so no issues with setting a precedent.

So I took her anyway--and I'm pretty sure he hasn't even noticed that she's there.

Today we carpooled with DH so that we could go directly to the funeral visitation tonight (an hour away from home) and didn't get home until 9:00. Tomorrow is the funeral, which will be an all day event with lots of out-of-town relatives. But FIL will not be staying with us, so at least we don't have the added stress of overnight guests.

Friday we head to Hometown for the weekend (where we will be staying with FIL). There's a lot to do between now and then, both at work and at home.

*Yes we are geeks. The twins are also attending a science camp later this summer, further reinforcing our geekiness. The purpose of PS's camp is to get girls more interested in engineering--still a heavily male-dominated field. And interestingly, my girls were the only girls attending the sold-out lego robotics camp.

A Mother's Rant

2011-06-26T07:33:00.002-06:00

To the lady at the table behind us at dinner last night: yes, I did give you an icy-cold death stare. Your baby screamed the entire time we were at dinner. It was not "fussing," it was screaming. And as much as you may have wanted a nice dinner out, so did every other diner and the restaurant and they were deprived of this opportunity because of your selfishness. Not to mention that your child was tired or hungry or otherwise ailed, and simply did not want to be there.

I understand that it may have been a long time since you have gone out to dinner. But that is one of the consequences of having children. Believe me, I have missed my share of hot meals, dinners out, movies, concerts and theater productions, because I had young children. And I have had to leave restaurants and church and shopping malls because I had babies who were uncooperative. It's no fun to have your meal wrapped up to take home, but that is what you do when your child is screaming at the top of her lungs. And now that my children are old enough to leave the house and act like civilized human beings, I really don't want to listen to your child scream. I've suffered through years of missing out on fun things because of my children--now its your turn. It won't last forever (unless you're the Duggar Family). Suck it up and realize that the world does not revolve around you and your adorable little bundle of screams.

To the lady who attempted to bring her one-year old to the theater last night: A one-year old is never, ever, ever going to sit through a theater production. One-year olds like to talk and play. They do not like to sit still for three hours and watch adults sing and dance on a stage 50 feet away. At least you figured this out early on and removed your child. But really...you're not going to be able to go to the theater for years unless you get a babysitter. Just save yourself the cost of the tickets and rent a DVD.

To the the adults who kept entering and leaving the theater in the middle of the show last night: unacceptable. I didn't let my 9-year olds leave in the middle of the act to go to the bathroom, but it is hard to explain that this is poor theater etiquette there were so many adults coming in and out. (It later appeared that these adults were the parents of children who had a very short spot at the end of the second act--which seems even more appalling to me. If you kid is in the show, you should know how an audience member should behave.)

To the adults who left candy wrappers in the floor of the theater: Disgusting. This is not a movie theater. Food is not even allowed in. How hard is it to pick up your own trash?

Long Week

2011-06-24T19:46:00.003-06:00

So our kid-free week has come to an end. It was fun, but I am definitely too old for the going out every night thing. And I am so glad to have all my girls back. They have hardly stopped chattering (or eating!) since they got home.

But it's also been a dramatic week with my co-worker getting fired and DH's great-uncle passing away this morning. We visited his aunt and uncle earlier this week, knowing that the end was likely near, which brought memories of our last days with MIL. Because all of our side of the family is out of town, we will likely have company coming in for the funeral. Company meaning FIL and likely his wife. That is still a touchy issue (yes, I know some of my readers are critical of this.)

I guess I need to do some major grocery shopping and house cleaning (not to mention the disgusting camp laundry--thank god I don't have boys because 3 girls are gross enough).

And I have a spa appointment tomorrow morning. I have a GC that I have been sitting on since my birthday and it has to be used by the end of the month--this was the only time available when I finally called a couple of weeks ago. Not great timing with the kids just getting home and company in, but hopefully it will help me relax and deal with it all.

Always look on the bright side of life

2011-06-22T22:25:00.002-06:00

I was whistling this all morning after seeing a certain musical last night, although it's a bit cheerier that I feel.

My problem with being too slow at work has just resolved. My co-worker was fired yesterday. He was the only other full-time regular associate, so much of his work will likely be shifted to me until a replacement is found (which, if history holds true, could be a while).

My bosses took great care to explain to me that it was not a lay off and that my job is absolutely secure and that they could not anticipate a reason that they would ever need let me go because I am such a valuable asset to the firm. But while it was nice to hear high praise for my work, I felt terrible for my coworker. It wasn't really a shock, though, since I had been tasked with re-checking his work on several occasions.

He asked to talk to me after he found out, and the bosses agreed to this. And he asked what he could have done differently (I think he was truly shocked). I told him that if he wasn't getting feedback he needed to ask for it. You can only improve your work product if you know what the problem is. And sometimes you have to detect subtleties to know that there is a problem. (He knew I was re-doing one of his motions which should have been a bright red flag.)

He also complained that he didn't get enough input when he didn't know how to do something. We didn't talk much about this, but one thing I learned early in my career is that "I don't know, but I can figure it out" is a great answer. The key is that you have to be able to figure it out. He wasn't able to do that, and no senior partner wants to baby-step an associate through drafting a simple motion or discovery. You have to take the initiative to find a form or a book or someone a couple of years ahead of you who can point you in the right direction.

So, those are my bits of advice for young lawyers: be someone who can figure things out and be proactive in discovering your weaknesses.

Camp in the age of the internet

2011-06-19T07:24:00.003-06:00

This morning I am tying up all of the last minute details before we send the kids off to camp. One of which is setting up an account so that I can email the girls at camp. You can't use regular email. You have to use the GS proprietary system that lets you send "bunk notes" that are printed off and delivered to the girls with the regular mail. Oh yeah, and you have to pay for this service. Messages start at $1 and go up by $1 per add on if you want to make it in color or add a picture or a word game. So one email can end up costing $3. And you have to buy credits for this service in $10 increments. Per kid. So I have to pay a minimum of $20 to email my kids at camp. Makes a postage stamp look like a bargain. (Not to mention I already went old school and hid little notes throughout their suitcases.)

This is a little irritating to me. Especially because I have been getting blast emails for the last two months encouraging me to buy a bunch of overpriced crap to be delivered to my kids while they are at camp. They are definitely playing the "show your kids you love them through material possessions" card. I didn't really think that was what GS was all about.
I think scouting is a great program, and I know that the money made off of these ventures goes back to the scouts, but I am not loving this particular fund raising mechanism.

Meanwhile, PS's camp is not allowing any electronics, either. (Can you imagine the number of cell phones and ipods that will be confiscated by the end of the week from 300 middle schoolers?) But they have set up a twitter feed so that the parents can see what is going on. So yesterday I joined the 21st century and set up a twitter account. I still don't really see the point of twitter, but maybe I'm just getting old. I'm following a few business, and it seems to me like I have just voluntarily signed up to be affronted with even more advertising. Why would I do this to myself?

However, a new social networking site that I LOVE is pinterest. I describe it as a visual bookmarking site that you can share with the world. Your "pins" are images/links that take you back to whatever you are pinning. I can spend hours on this new time-waster.

Summer Camp

2011-06-18T05:37:00.003-06:00

Tomorrow the twins leave for camp, and PS heads out on Monday. DH and I will be empty-nesters for a week, and we plan to take full advantage. We've already got tix to the theater, a baseball game and passes for the movie theater that serves booze (and mediocre food).

But getting ready for camp has become a major undertaking.

On Tuesday we were informed PS must have a one-piece swimsuit for camp. Do you know how hard it is to find a one-piece these days? Especially for a 12-year-0d trapped between kids and juniors sizes? She already has a modest tankini, but the half-inch of belly it shows might cause boys to be overcome with lewd and lascivious thoughts. (Can you tell she's going to church camp?)

So I took a two-hour lunch on Wednesday to peruse the frou-frou mall a block from my office. (Note to self: Do not go shopping on the day you wear your highest heels.) I would text pics of what I found, and PS would respond with "ughs". I came home with a suit she thought was "ok," but that ended up being too small. (This shopping challenge is complicated by the fact that PS has been volunteering with the stage crew of our local theater company from 7-11 every night. I rarely get home before 7, so there has been no chance to go shopping together.)

Thursday the kids were directed to pack while I was at work. I got home at 8, only to find that 4 out of the 5 pairs of shorts each twin had packed were too small. So we flew out the door to hit Old Navy before they closed at 9:00. Fortunately, they were running great sales and I was able to pick up 8 pairs of shorts, 2 bathing suits and a couple of t-shirts for about $100. Woot!

Unfortunately, we got home to find half of it didn't fit. Apparently the kids have grown a lot since last summer. So last night we repeated our expedition, this time trying on. Whew! At least the twins are packed. But PS still needs new shoes and a swimsuit and possibly a couple of pairs of shorts, so there will be more shopping today.

And then on Sunday, we make the 4-hour round trip to drop off the twins. Happy Father's Day--you're getting rid of the kids for a week!

Loose Ends

2011-06-11T06:32:00.003-06:00

1) I seem to have come out of my funk. Still don't know what is going on with my kid, though, since they had to rerun a bunch of her bloodwork and it takes forever to get results. But since she is acting perfectly normal these days, it's hard to believe that something is wrong.

2) We are not filing a grievance against Lawyer A. I do think his conduct was both despicable and unethical. But filing a grievance against an attorney is a very serious, career-altering move. I discussed it with my partners and we decided that since his conduct was recorded on the record and the judge admonished him in open court that this matter had been handled. My client is already stressed by being involved in these proceedings that she is not a party to and has little interest in getting involved in another mess by filing a grievance.

3) I'm still slow and bored at work. I was at a CLE yesterday and ran into an old law school friend. She asked what I was doing and if I liked it--and my response was "I'm bored." I couldn't even bring myself to couch it or tell a little white lie (although I am a terrible liar, anyway.) And then, one of the points made at the CLE was that if you are discontent, or worse, unhappy, you need to make a change because you only have one life and you need to get the most out of it. And a corollary point was made that very few good things in life happen without risk. I am taking this advice to heart and trying to figure out what to do about it.

We're going to Vegas

2011-06-07T19:03:00.003-06:00

We just got notice that DH's employer is sending him to a conference in Vegas in the fall. And I think I will go with him. His conference runs Sunday night through Wednesday, so we could fly in together the Friday before, spend the weekend together, and I can fly back home on Monday morning.

We've been to Vegas once before, and I didn't really care for it. It just seemed so fake. And the cigarette smoke that permeated everything really inflamed my allergies. And I got tired of seeing boobies everywhere. And I'm too cheap to gamble.

So why the heck to I want to go back? Well, we really want to see the Beatles' LOVE show. And a weekend away in a nice hotel sounds pretty good. And a subsidized mini-vacation is always a good thing. (When the kids were little, they only time we got to go anywhere was when DH had a conference. Hence, the last visit to Vegas.) And now I know exactly what to expect going in and think that 2 full days is just enough time.

Yay--it's nice to have a little trip with DH to look forward to.

Re: the last two posts

2011-06-06T22:16:00.003-06:00

The judge signed the order granting the government's injunction at 9:30 Sunday night (the emergency injunction was to expire today). My client's testimony was cited by the court and clearly given a lot of weight. This was fantastic news for her, as all of the defendants worked hard to undermine her credibility during cross examination. And it assured her that her testimony had not been for naught.

A great day to be a lawyer

2011-06-04T05:45:00.002-06:00

Despite my fury Thursday night, which had not dissipated much by Friday morning, the hearing on Friday went really well. From a law geek perspective, it was actually fun--and it's been a while since I've had fun while working.

My client was the key witness for a government agency in a civil suit involving many, many defendants represented by about 10 different law firms. Most of the lawyers were old white guys, several from very large and prestigious firms. A handful of them were there to meet with me why I arrived and convince me that I was wrong and that the judge would surely rule against me.

I let them know in no uncertain terms that I would fight any attempts to recall my client to the stand. The lawyer I had spoken with the night before (we'll call him lawyer A) was a total arrogant ass who probably wouldn't know the truth if it bit him in the ass. Lawyer A is not a biglaw lawyer, and I suspect his attempts to intimidate me were at least partially for show for the benefit his higher paid counterparts.

And then the government lawyer arrived and he was almost as furious as I was about Lawyer A's conduct and also let him know it.

When court finally started, the government lawyer introduced me to the court so that we could deal with the issue of my missing witness and whether she was still under subpoena. I told the court about the other attorney's conduct and explained that she was not there and that I did not believe that she was obligated to be there or to that she was still subject to the subpoena with which she had already complied, and that all parties had already had to opportunity to examine her.

Lawyer A attempted to favorably spin his conduct and then said that by telling my client not to comply with a subpoena, my conduct was equally inappropriate. The judge ignored Lawyer A's statement about me, and mildly admonished* Lawyer A for his conduct and ordered him to have no additional contact with my client. The court did not immediately rule on whether my client could or would be recalled to the stand, and wanted to hear from another witnesses first. (Which drew objection from Lawyer A, because he wanted my client to be at court just in case the court ruled in his favor.)

By the time the court took a break, Lawyer A decided that he didn't need my client after all and the court granted my request to formally release her from all outstanding subpoenas.

I have to admit that I am really proud of how I handled the whole situation. I got the desired result for my client, and stood up to bullies, and I presented a good, short argument to the court. Standing in that courtroom with a federal judge, a dozen or more lawyers, an above-average number of spectators (and probably press), I felt like LC versus the world. But I wasn't even nervous, because I knew that I was right.

I've come a long way since my first argument in court, where my knees were shaking so much I could barely stand up straight.

* Lawyer A's behavior was truly abhorrent for several reasons I have not mentioned.** I kept it short in front of the court, because my goal was to protect my client rather than implicate his professional conduct. I did not want the court to disregard my argument because I was just "throwing stones" at the other attorney.

**One of the things he told my client was that I had not been practicing for very long and probably wasn't used to practicing in federal court. How dare you implicate my professional capabilities to my client--especially when you're just making shit up. I'm admitted in every federal district in my state and I regularly practice in federal court. I'm the go-to girl in my firm for federal procedural issues, and I know the nuances in the local rules for the different districts.

Shaking with Fury

2011-06-02T23:01:00.002-06:00

lI have somehow managed to become counsel for a nonparty witness in a federal case. I attended a hearing with her on Tuesday where she testified that she was represented by counsel and gave my name on the record. She was thoroughly examined for over two hours, and we left after her testimony because she was sequestered from hearing the rest of the proceedings.

I'm following the case on PACER and so I knew that the court had requested additional briefing and that another hearing was set for Friday. But nobody contacted me regarding her testimony and, based on the briefings, it did not appear that additional testimony from my client was necessary to resolve the outstanding issues.

And then, this afternoon, one of the parties contacted my client to ask if she would attend Friday's hearing. I told her that his attorney needed to contact me so that we could discuss it. No call. And the more I thought about it, the less inclined I was to allow my client to be put through the cross-examination ringer again.

I came home, had dinner with the kids, watched a movie with DH, and was heading to bed at 10:45 when I saw multiple missed calls and texts from my client starting at about 9:00 tonight. The party's attorney had been calling and texting her about appearing, and was threatening to have her arrested if she did not appear!

OMG, I have never been so angry at another attorney. I immediately called him (yes, at 11:00 tonight, because he was still texting my client when I finally talked to her) and told him to immediately cease all communication with her. He informed me that he is the president of the ethics division of our state bar and that he had committed no ethical breach. Bullshit. It took me all of 30 seconds to find the rule that expressly says you can't contact someone you know to be represented by a lawyer without the consent of the lawyer. Not to mention the rule that says you can threaten people with civil or criminal process unless you have a valid basis for it. Maybe I should have informed him that I got an almost perfect score on the MPRE.

And then he kept going on and on about his 20 years of experience and how [Judge's First Name] would issue a bench warrant the moment he asked for it and that my client was obligated to return to court or be in contempt. I told him that he was awfully confident.

Anyway, I'm meeting him at court in the morning, but my client will not be there. He's pretty peeved about it, but I'm ready to fight this battle. I don't respond well to unethical bullies, and I'll be happy to point out his transgressions to the court.

Thoughts on Disaster

2011-05-30T08:02:00.002-06:00

I can see how all of the horrible of weather events lately could lead a non-atheist to believe that the rapture is coming. Hurricanes and tornadoes and floods and wildfires. It seems that there hasn't been a corner of the world left untouched.

I grew up in tornado alley and tornado warnings were pretty common, so I've never gotten too freaked out by tornadoes.* As kids, we pretty much had to be able to see the funnel before we took cover. Once the sirens went off, the whole neighborhood ran outside to look for the tornado. Our neighbors were to only family on the block with a storm cellar, and there had to be an imminent threat to go down there. It was dark and dank and full of bugs and mice and who knows what else.

But the recent tornadoes and horrible destruction in Joplin and Tuscaloosa have us all a little more on edge when the storm sirens start going off. One night last week the sirens were going off for hours. The kids spent the evening hanging out in the closet under the stairs with their bicycle helmets on. (Nerdy!) At one point they had the bright idea to take the dog and two cats in there with them--you can imagine how well that went over. DH and I were sitting on the couch about 15 feet away.

And this weekend, wildfires were taking over our hometown. They already suffered wildfires earlier this year that burned many homes. This time fewer homes were burned, but two of those were in the neighborhood that FIL and other relatives live in. They were all forced to evacuate last night. That was definitely a little too close for comfort.

I don't remember a year with so many adverse weather events. It does leave you wondering what is causing it and when is it going to end.

*I was at a business dinner about a year ago, and my tablemates were fascinated when they learned my hometown. They wanted to know if I had ever seen a tornado (yes, several), if I had ever been in a tornado (within about half a mile), how often tornadoes came along (a lot).

An update of sorts

2011-05-24T18:19:00.003-06:00

We finally heard back from the rheumatologist's office today. All of the tests that they have results for are normal. But some of the tests "were not obtained" so they are sending us a scrip to have more bloodwork done. WTF does the tests "were not obtained" mean? Did you lose some of the 15 bazillion vials of blood that you already took from my kid? Were they broken, contaminated?

TT will be thrilled to learn that she has to be vampirized again.

Meanwhile, my funk continues. It is more than just being worried about TT. It is also because I'm not happy with my job. I have been very slow for several weeks now. It is always unsettling to be low on hours for an extended period of time (although it is good timing with all of the medical appointments and end of the school year activities), because the possibility of layoffs always lies in the background. But I am reasonably certain that I would not be the first to go even if things don't pick up soon.

But besides being slow, I am bored. I work in a specialized niche of commercial litigation--and this particular field just isn't especially exciting. I feel like I do the same thing over and over. I would kill for a little variety, but I am in a true boutique firm (no, a 40 person insurance defense firm is not a litigation boutique, Mr. Recruiter).

I need something exciting, something that challenges me and makes my brain work. I'm not getting that right now, and the days just drag.

But I am hesitant to make a change. I have a level of comfort in my firm. I'm afraid of another crazy boss, and I get along with the attorneys that I work with now. I also have flexibility. I can leave early for a teacher conference or stay home with a sick kid and nobody really notices or cares as long as I am getting my work done. No one has ever made a peep about my billable hours. My billables requirement is low, and I am paid well--especially considering the billables requirement. And I am certain that I am on a 7 year partnership track, if that is what I want.

Besides, the job market is still pretty soft. But I really need some interesting work before my brain goes soft.

Out of Sorts

2011-05-17T16:00:00.002-06:00

I have been feeling a bit off lately. Cranky and short-tempered. Not as productive and organized as usual. And I'm pretty sure it's starting to show at work. At least twice in the last week one of my bosses have asked me about something that I either completely forgot about or was slow to complete. That is definitely not my style.

I'm not sure what the source of my off-ness is. I think a lot of it has to do with being worried about TT. At her appointment last week, I expected the rheumatologist to say that the ANA test is an unreliable indicator and that she just needed a recheck in a few months. Instead she ordered a battery of new bloodwork. They are testing for Lupus. TT doesn't have most of the typical symptoms, but she has a few. And it will be another week before we have test results.

Lupus is scary. Definitely not something that I want one of my kids to have to deal with. But I feel like we are too lucky. We have three really awesome kids. They don't have behavior issues. They don't have mental health issues. They don't have health issues (until now). They are smart and do well in school.

It seems so unfair that my kids don't have any real problems when I have friends and acquaintances whose kids have autism and Tourette's and epilepsy and severe behavioral and mental health issues and cancer. And so I'm afraid that it's our turn to have to deal with something terrible.

I felt almost despondent today when I spilled a cup of coffee all over my desk. It didn't hit anything important--so no big deal, right? But it just felt like one more thing piling up on me. I need to shake this off and get over this hump.

Alone and Bored

2011-05-09T09:57:00.002-06:00

How is that possible? Because I set a speed record in the shower this morning before I had to hop back out and barf my guts up. I'm guessing it's a virus, because food poisoning doesn't make sense. But it doesn't feel like a virus. It feels like a hangover. Or pregnancy. I'm 100% certain it's neither of those, so I guess we're back to a virus.

And so I am lying here, trying to be still. And bored. And trying to figure out how to handle TT's appointment with the rheumatologist this afternoon. It is a 30-mile commute into Big City, and right now driving in a car sounds, well, nauseating. And if it truly is a virus, I don't want to expose anybody else. But it is a really important appointment and I really want to be there. (DH had planned to meet us there, so he could just take TT if I can't make it. But I'm anal-retentive and I know I'll get all grouchy if he doesn't ask the questions I think he should. Yes, this is a personality flaw.)

I've got another hour to see if my stomach settles--maybe it's only a six-hour bug-ha!

Happy Mother's Day!

2011-05-08T08:14:00.002-06:00

I hope all of the law moms are adequately spoiled.

DH and I ran the urban dare race yesterday. It's not a regular road race--it's kind of like a scavenger hunt. We had to solve a bunch of clues to figure out where to go, and then plot out the best route between points throughout downtown of Big City. We finished in the top third which I think was not too bad since it was our first time doing this kind of race, and since I'm still grounded from running. DH definitely could have finished faster without me slowing him down (or maybe not, since I'm a better navigator and more familiar with downtown).

We're guessing that we walked 5 miles (in 2.5 hours). Now I can feel every single muscle from my waist down. Seriously, why does my butt hurt so much? I think I may be more out of shape than I have led myself to believe.

This morning I have been showered with drawings and poems from the girls. I love the things they write, they're so funny. DH got me a GC to Barnes and Noble so I can refill my Nook (although I have no shortage of books--but book buying is my weakness,) and tickets to see Rock of Ages (which I may have dropped a few hints about).

Next week is a crazy one on the kid front. TT finally has her appointment with the rheumatologist and a recheck with the orthopedist. And we have PS's award ceremony, programs by the twins on two separate days, and a teacher conference --all in the middle of the day! I really wish our suburban school realized how difficult mid-day events are on parents who work in the city. My bosses may think I've quit my job, with all of the time I need to be out. And DH's department is in the middle of a huge project with an imminent deadline and they aren't allowing anyone to take time off right now. Good thing I'm not especially busy at work right now!

This and That

2011-05-01T08:49:00.003-06:00

It was a good weekend in the LC household. I accepted the award on Friday and received many nice compliments (and turned many shades of pink). I'm still astonished at how little is required to be recognized. The conference was really good. I was impressed with the quality of speakers at a small bar association's conference and I picked up some good info.

TT and SS, along with the rest of their troop, earned the bronze award in Girl Scouts, which is the highest award they can earn at their level. Yay!

And DH finished his second 5K. But it was not just a regular old 5K, it was one of the new-fangled run through the woods, jump over fire, climb over barriers, and swim through a mud pit kind of 5Ks. We don't have official results yet, but his time was respectable--not too far off from his first 5K, which did not involve all of the obstacles.

It was really interesting to watch the sizes and shapes of the people crossing the finish line. Many flabbier people were well ahead of their skinny-mini counterparts. It just goes to show that thin does not equal fit. And well-defined muscles do not mean that you are automatically prepared for an intense cardio workout.

DH and I are doing an urban race next weekend. Kinda like the amazing race with clues and trivia and obstacles. I'm still grounded from running, but I have been walking, and I think I can handle this. Hopefully our brains can compensate for my lack of athleticism.

Well, that was really unexpected

2011-04-28T19:58:00.004-06:00

So, I got a call today from my contact at Legal Aid. She informed me that I am being presented with an award tomorrow for performing the most pro bono hours in a certain county. How is that possible? It's not in Big City where I practice, or in the suburb where I live. It is one county over from where I live, and I did pick up a pro bono case there last year. One. And it was not a complex or particularly time-consuming case.

The first thing I asked her, was "are you sure?" And she assured me that she was. Apparently nobody steps up for pro bono work in that county, and it is one where there really is a great deal of need. I interned in the district attorney's office there when I was in law school. As a second year law student I got to work on two capital murder cases (one was a death penalty case, and yes, the D was sentenced to death), a first degree murder, an aggravated kidnapping by a meth dealer (I think I know how to build a meth lab now) and plenty of other drug and child molestation cases. No chance in heck I would have been able to work on those kinds of cases in Big City--their interns worked on DUI cases. But this county is rural and poor and overrun with drug problems--and there were only 4 ADAs

Anyway, I really do not feel like I deserve any kind of award. But the legal aid contact was pushing hard for me to attend. She said that that they already had the plaque engraved and that they had already paid for me to attend the bench/bar conference tomorrow where the awards are being presented. And so I guess I will go and graciously accept an award I don't deserve (and pick up some free CLE credit!).

But I had to reschedule a meeting with a current pro bono client to attend. Can you say irony?

Nice break

2011-04-24T19:56:00.002-06:00

Happy Easter to all who celebrate.

We spent our weekend in a little cabin on the edge of a river with the most fantastic multi-level deck that leads town to a fishing dock. Despite predictions, the weather remained clear, and we had a great time.

DH and the kids caught lots of fish while I sat on the deck watching a reading, frosty beverage in hand. I decided to re-read the Harry Potter series. I have only been through the series once, and I started when I was pregnant with the twins--so about 10 years ago. The last book came out the week before I took the bar exam--can you imagine what torture that was? It is fascinating to re-read Book 1 and pick up on all of the hints and bits of foreshadowing. And it is so amazing to realize how carefully J.K. Rowling must have planned to be able to tie it all together. I very rarely re-read book (because there is always something new and unknown that I want to read!), but I'm so glad to have picked this series up again. My goal is to get through it before the last movie come out.

Anyway, we also fit in a short canoe trip and about 5 miles of hiking. We tried to stick with the easy hiking trails because of TT's arm, but at one point she decided to take off running at top speed. The kids were about 20 yards ahead of us, and I heard PS yell "don't run!" and then I heard TT crying. She had tripped and landed face-down, right on top of her splinted arm. She was covered in mud, scraped up her uninjured arm, and had a big gash on her knee. But the splint seems to have protected the broken arm. Lesson learned: don't take kids with broken arms on any trails--or even let them outside--until they are completely healed.

I wish the weekend were longer. I'm not ready to start another week.

At least tomorrow is a fake Friday

2011-04-20T16:17:00.002-06:00

Well, yesterday sucked and today wasn't much better.

I spent my morning in a settlement meeting. We were so close, I really thought it was a done deal. And then opposing counsel demanded a term that we just couldn't agree to. Everything fell apart from there. Argh.

Headed back to the office for 2 hours, which was just enough time to resolve another case. At least I accomplished something today.

But bitchy secretary just had to stop by my office and start prodding me: "So, you kid's arm really was hurt, huh? I guess you were wrong about it not being broken. I bet you feel really bad about not taking her to the doctor." I just gave her the evil eye, because all of the responses I was thinking in my head (like "fuck off, bitch") would have been inappropriate from an HR standpoint. (And the only reason she knows any of this is because she eavesdrops on my telephone conversations.)

Left the office at 2:15 to pick TT up at 3 for our 3:45 appointment. Somewhere in there we had just enough time for ice cream. Yay! Waited for 30 minutes to see a doctor for 2 minutes who decided that we only needed a splint, not a cast. That was good news. Casts are itchy and can't get wet. At least TT can take the splint off to bathe...and scratch.

Came home, played a raucous game of Boggle (we're all about the scatological humor) and sent the girls off to pack for our trip this weekend. Then I checked the weather, and it is supposed to storm all weekend. Fantastic. So much for hiking and canoeing. Hopefully we can still squeeze in some fishing (fortunately TT casts with her right hand--it's the left that is broken--because she has been begging to go fishing). And I guess we'll be packing up the Boggle.

After this week I am REALLY looking forward to a weekend in a cabin with a bottle of wine and trashy magazines.

Major Mommy Fail

2011-04-19T21:06:00.002-06:00

Over a week ago my nanny called to tell me that TT had fallen at school and hurt her arm. The school nurse thought she was fine, but Nanny thought it looked swollen and said that TT was complaining about it a lot. So I left work early so that I could take a look and determine if she needed to go to an urgent care center (of course, it was 4:00 on a Friday afternoon and I wasn't getting in with my doc.) And because I have broken half the bones in my body and nobody (including the school nurse) ever believed I had a break--except my mom. ( And every time she said it was broken it really was.)

But when I got home it didn't look very bad. So I just hung out with her and watched to see if she was using or favoring her arm. I started tossing toys at her to see if she would catch them. And she really seemed fine. So I did not take her in.

Sometime last week, she fell at school (again) and hurt her arm (again). She has been falling a lot and has been getting big ugly bruises, so I called the doc to make an appointment. And they couldn't get me in until this Monday. Yeah, I was annoyed, but she still wasn't acting particularly hurt, so I didn't push it. Meanwhile, over the weekend, TT fell (again) while riding her bicycle and hurt her arm a third time

So Monday she finally got to see the doc, who took five vials of blood (for the clumsiness and unexplained bruising) and ordered an X-ray because she though TT's arm was pretty swollen (but not bruised, despite the giant bruises she has been getting everywhere else).

Today I got the results of both. TT's wrist is fractured and we have an appointment with an orthopedist tomorrow to have a cast put on. Yeah, totally missed that one. Apparently I did not inherit my mother's ability to diagnose broken bones. (I went more than two weeks with two broken feet last summer before I saw a doc, so I really should have know this.) God, I feel terrible. I felt like a mommy failure when PS first had to get glasses because I hadn't noticed sooner that she couldn't read anything. This is about a million times worse.

And while her bloodwork ruled out most blood disorders, her ANA count was very high, which can be indicative of an autoimmune disorder. We have been referred to a pediatric rheumatologist, but apparently, there is only one pediatric rheumatologist in all of Big City. (How is that possible?) So who knows how long it will take to actually get an appointment with this doctor. Meanwhile I am trying not to freak out. WedMD is not helping. But I did get some comfort from reading actual medical journals that seem to indicate a fairly high number of false-positives with this test.

Of course, adding to my worry is the fact that this child is an identical twin. Which means that if she does have something serious, there's a good possibility that her twin could have the same thing. Ugh. It sucks when you can't protect your kids from crap like this.

Cranky

2011-04-14T19:00:00.002-06:00

I hate Word 2007. Hate, hate, hate it. I have had it on my machine for years, and i have never figured out the stupid ribbon menu. I can't freaking figure out how to do anything.

I have to file a brief with the state supreme court tomorrow. It's done--I just need to do the table of contents and table of authorities. I don't do these very often, and it is always a PITA. And for some inexplicable reason, I am far more tech savvy than my staff, so if I can't figure it out, it ain't gonna happen.

I started playing around with in in Word 2008 for Mac, and it worked ok, but the TOC wasn't picking up all of my tagged titled. And it kept changing the font--which is bad because the rules contain very specific font requirements.

So I thought I would just bring it home and work out the kinks on my PC, because I'm a PC girl and generally blame the stupid mac for all of my problems. But the Word '08 of Mac is about a million times more user friendly that the '07 on my PC.

But I'm about to throw my laptop out a window, so I guess I will have to figure it all out on my mac tomorrow.

It doesn't help that I am seriously hurting right now. I was rear-ended on my way to work on Tuesday. It didn't seem too bad--his car looks a whole lot worse than mine. But I was pretty sore, and by the end of the day, I made an appt with my doc. She gave me some scrips, but I didn't fill them, because I'm not big on taking drugs, and the pain was not unbearable. And then today I woke up and couldn't turn my neck. Now I have shooting pain in my neck and shoulders. I really want to take a muscle relaxer, but I was trying to finish formatting my stupid brief first.

And I had a hearing on a pro bono matter that left me fuming. The prosecutor flat-out refused to consider any evidence that was favorable to my client. Then she said, "my job is to decide guilt or innocence." Hmmm, I thought that was the jury's job. I'm pretty sure the prosecutor's job is to ensure justice is had. To me that means considering all of the evidence--not just the state's version of events. She also said (this is a juvenile truancy case), "I don't consider it bullying when it is many different kids doing it over a period of time. It's only bullying when it is one kid who repeatedly harasses another." WTF? She also refused to voluntarily turn over any discovery because "it's sounds like you are on a fishing expedition so that you can build a lawsuit against the school district." Again, WTF? When I worked in the DA's office we always turned over the entire file upon request. I think she is a bully, and most of the kids she deals with don't have the benefit of a lawyer.

Weekend Ramblings

2011-04-10T18:05:00.004-06:00

PS and I had matinee tickets to a local theater production, so we made a day of it and headed to the mall for lunch and a bit of shopping. It was a nice mom/daughter day.

Afterward we headed to a nearby running store that I have been meaning to visit ever since I broke my feet. $125 later and I was fitted with a sparkly new pair of Asics Gel Nimbus 12. (Doesn't that sounds like something Harry Potter would wear?) I have definitely never paid that much for a pair of running shoes, but it is much cheaper than a pair of robot boots. Interestingly, I was sized at 7.5. Every pair of shoes in my closet is a 9. Apparently I'm not a 9, I just have super-wide Barney Rubble feet and have been ordering up to compensate for them.

Then we decided to make a quick run into Central Market to grab a particular sauce that I use as a base in DH's favorite dish. Ha! That place is freaking nuts on a Sunday afternoon--comparable to Disneyland on a Saturday in June. There were people every where, and they weren't especially polite. And it's a maze like Ikea--once you're in, there's no leaving unless you find one of their super-secret exit passageways. And the trip was futile, because they no longer carried the sauce that I went in for (although a very helpful employee did help me locate a couple of similar products to experiment with). I definitely won't be visiting Central Market on a weekend again any time soon.

Finally made it home in time for dinner and to help TT out with her research project. Her topic is "volcanoes." Her teacher told me last week that TT was having trouble focusing her research. Ummm, ya think it's because her topic is "volcanoes."? That's pretty dang broad. I told TT that we needed to start an outline of what we are trying to learn about volcanoes. I also insisted that we research with books instead of doing broad internet searches. Stunningly, her research is suddenly more focused.

Meanwhile, I am becoming an expert on volcanoes when I need to be drafting a response to a petition for writ of mandamus that was requested by our state supreme court and is due in a week. I was making good headway on Friday until I got a call from our nanny telling me that TT had hurt her harm and that she thought it might be broken. I rushed home (and after observing TT for half an hour determined that her arm was definitely not broken), and intended to return to my writ response this weekend. But the weekend is almost over and I've made no more progress on my response. I see a late night in my near future.

Sum-sum-summertime

2011-04-08T20:13:00.004-06:00

It seems like spring has just started, but summer is already moving toward us, full steam ahead. I've signed all three girls up for summer camp--in the same week!!! What are DH and I going to do with a week without kids? We could go for dinner or drinks every night. We could go to the theater, or the comedy club we've been meaning to try, or a baseball game. And we won't have to worry about rushing home to relieve the sitter. It will be like we get our own grown-up camp. And the kids will be having a blast.

I've also reserved a condo on the beach for a week at the end of the summer. We had tossed around a couple of ideas for a summer vacation, but this is the most economical. (I'm trying to reserve vacation funds so that we can take the kids on a cruise within the next year. Unfortunately, a trial just got set on the week I was shooting for, so we'll have to see how that plays out.) I'm so looking forward to a week on the beach--although August seems like a really long way off right now.

And by the end of summer I've got to make some major decisions about what I am going to do with the kids next year. My nanny is going off to college, and I just don't know if we still need a nanny starting next year. The twins will be in the 5th grade. PS will be in 8th--and 13. PS is super responsible and definitely doesn't need a babysitter. I have a little less faith in the twins, but they get home from school only about an hour before PS.

Also, our nanny helps out with the housekeeping and the kids laundry. That is huge. And she's available to run the kids around when they have after-school activities. Maybe I can just replace her with a housekeeper with light child care responsibilities, although in my experience it is tough to find someone who does both. At least I have a few months to figure this out.

Adventures in Babysitting

2011-04-06T21:27:00.002-06:00

I answered the call of a friend who desperately needed a babysitter so that they could go visit her DH's mom in the ICU,where babies aren't allowed. It was well timed because I was already taking off early to pick my girls up from school because my nanny needed the day off because her mother was having surgery. And since so many people jumped in to help us out when MIL was sick, we appreciate the opportunity to pay it forward.

So I got to spend the evening with a 10-month-old bundle of adorableness, and my girls got a little babysitter training. They have never spent much time around babies, and none of them ever really played with baby dolls or shown any interest in babies. They still didn't show much interest in this baby. But I made PS feed him and change his diaper and I have a hilarious video of her trying to wrestle him into his pajamas. He was a really good sport during all of this.

I ordered a pizza for dinner, which was an experience in itself because Pizza Hut has the suckiest mobile app ever and would only let me have a pizza delivered to my home address. (I was babysitting at the baby's house.) I couldn't even fix it by logging in directly to their website on my phone, because they have an equally sucky mobile web page that also would not let me change my delivery address. Get with it Pizza Hut--surely you can find better programmers that this. I finally got a pizza ordered by, gasp!, using my phone and calling (although even that took two phone calls).

So the pizza guy rang the door bell and the dog started barking ferociously and the baby started fussing. I handed the baby to PS and squeezed out the front door to keep the dog from eating the pizza guy. Who was a 30-something white guy with a jeri curl and a KISS necklace. Who proceeded to tell me all about his own dog, and then run back to his car to grab his cell phone so that he could show me pictures of his own dog.

Finally got rid of the pizza guy, gave my kids pizza, and fed the baby some baby-cookies that he seemed to really like.

Despite the fact that he refused to go to bed when his mom said he would, he was a really good baby and so very cute. It was nice to spend an evening with a little one, but I'm pooped and so darn glad that my girls are big now. I truly have no desire to go back to having babies. They're just so much work--although it is a heck of a lot easier to chase after one than two.

The craziest thing I heard all week

2011-04-02T20:43:00.002-06:00

"I'm sorry, but my expert is not available on the day you noticed his deposition because he is going to Mount Ararat to help find Noah's Ark."

Seriously.