I am somewhat freaked out by my to-do list at work. It is long, and I am already juggling more cases than I ever did at Old Firm. I have been handed a few small cases to run with, and several medium to large cases that I am second or third-chairing. And then there are the projects on cases that I am not really involved with, but the attorney's just need a little help.
And in the middle of all the business, the school called on Wednesday and insisted that TT had pink-eye and that I pick her up. It didn't matter that I know my child, know she has allergies that affect her eyes, and had seen her a mere hour and a half before when she was most assuredly pink-eye free. I had to leave work to retrieve her and then make a doctor's appointment to acquire a note stating that the kid has allergies that sometimes make her eyes look red. (DH often deals with these kid emergencies, but he was launching a new international website last week and could not get away.)
So, missing a day of work has not helped, and I really need to put in some time today so that I don't get any further behind. I also have to draft a petition for my pro bono client. The one I picked up 3 months ago, when I was unemployed and had nothing better to do. She just last week returned the documents that I need to file her petition--arghhh!
And in the middle of all this, we had two soccer games yesterday and horseback riding lessons today. And I got the smackdown from PS's Russian violin teacher last week (she is very strict and I love her!). I told her that we were considering dropping violin lessons because PS did not seem dedicated enough to continue. Violin Teacher basically told me that it was my job to push PS to practice, that PS had the talent and ability to be a very good violinist, but that PS needed discipline. Violin Teacher then basically stated that white American children are lazy and undisciplined and not living up to their potential, and that the top orchestras in this area are filled with Asian musicians because their parents push them harder and they are far more disciplined.
The thing is, I push the girls very hard at school. I have had more than one teacher tell me that I push too hard. I have on many occasions asked for more challenging work for my kids because I don't think they are being being challenged to work to their full potential at school. But I don't do this with their extra-curriculars. My mindset has been that the girls need to find their "thing"--what they are good at and what they enjoy, and that the internal drive to be the best will follow.
I am extremely competitive. When I played an instrument, I wanted to be the best, and I practiced a lot to make sure I was the best. My parents never told me to practice--and honestly, probably wished that I had practiced a little less. I guess I expected the same from my kids.
But Violin Teacher made a very good point. Teaching kids the discipline to do something, even when they don't want to, is key to making them successful adults. Acquiring the discipline to practice the violin teaches PS the discipline to study when she gets to college or graduate school. And this is especially important for a smart kid who breezes through school.
So maybe we'll stick out the violin lessons--at least through the end of the year.
2 comments:
My parents forced me to practice piano as a kid, and I'm very glad they did. Our kid is only 1, but my husband and I have already had fights about how hard to push him when he gets old enough to try something and want to drop it. I plan on being brutal, he doesn't. But then, he regrets dropping piano lessons because now he can't play, whereas I find playing the piano one of the biggest blessings of my adulthood. It's led me to amazing friendships and experiences, in school choirs, church choirs, and playing in bars with a local band - all cool stuff that I wouldn't have had without it. Our fiddle player in the band was forced to play by his dad - he dropped it in his early twenties but picked it back up a few years later and now totally loves it.
So, clearly, I'm coming down on the "force the kid!" side! :) Just my two cents!
That's a very good point about the lack of discipline (I know I definitely have a huge lack of discipline, in all aspects of my life), although I do question making/allowing a child to practice an instrument as much as it takes to become a child virtuoso. There should be some balance in there somewhere! But I was allowed to quit after two years as a child, which was a huge mistake. I loved playing, I just got bored with practicing. Then I took lessons again as an adult, but had to quit again for a lack of funds/carpel tunnel issues. But now I'm trying to find a new violin teacher. It's been about 8 years since I last played, and I loved it so much, I want to get back into it. Maybe even play in a community orchestra someday when I'm old and rich enough to have such free time. ;)
But I think music lessons are just as important as making a kid learn history or geometry or chemistry. Entirely possible they will never ever use those exact skills as adults, but it's the process of learning that is important, not necessarily the subject matter. I agree though, if she doesn't like violin that much, let her find an instrument she does love. I always preferred strings, but some people love the brass band instruments (and all the band geekery that goes with it).
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